Last night when I talked to, Ben, he told me about a friend of his, he was irritated at him over a period of time. He’d known the guy for 20 years and then one day, he said something about what he was irritated about the guy never forgave him. It hurt him.
Ben still sees the man, knows the man, etc. but their friendship has never been the way was. Obviously this was not Ben’s intention but that doesn’t matter, what is done is done and he can only feel regret.
This happened to me recently. Someone said something to me and I just hit door, on the way out. I have no intention of ever passing through that door again. I can’t in my wildest imagination, envision it. I don’t know if this was intended or not and I can’t see that it matters – I will never be about to forget the communication.
I mention this because Mercury is conjunct Uranus in Aries and mouths can go off pretty easily. It just seems something worth keeping in mind.
I also should mention, my mouth has caused people to sever relationships with me, probably more times than I can count. I have apologized at times and my apology has not been accepted. I don’t dwell on things like this but I’d also like to have fewer accidents so I’ll be taking my own advice on this one.
Have you ever said something to a friend, they simply could not forget?
I’m sure it happens all the time because when asked my opinion, I’m very direct and don’t lie, but no one has ever said anything about it to me. However, I am the one who hears things I never forget – Mercury Jupiter Pisces. I remember everything. Things people have done and said to me are always in the back of my mind when I deal with them. All of my friends have screwed me over at some point (even my own mother).
I amputate people who really piss me off regularly. However, if I did that to everyone who has said or done something shitty to me, I’d be totally alone (and I don’t surround myself with a lot of people as it is). It usually takes a pattern before my Pisces gets fed up.
Ya I did something like that. Online and to a scorpio. I have since been mindful of what I say and when. Yesterday I felt like cutting a connection but it was stopped by merc retro and in the end all worked out beautifully. I am putting more faith in god right now and it’s been rewarding.
I’m one of those people who can’t ever forget when someone says something nasty to me… and all I have is Moon in Pisces sextile Mercury in Taurus (you’d think that’s good). The people who hurt me usually have heavy Capricorn. Almost like they get a kick out of saying things that are heavy and watching me soak them up and die.
I lot of people don’t like it when I mention “peptides” and say all our feelings are ours. Mine are mine, yours are yours, his are his, etc.
No one has the power to climb into my hypothalamus and tell it what peptide to create, then flood every cell in my body with. Nor do I have any power to climb into someone else’s hypothalamus and direct its production.
The truth only hurts when what we’ve been living is an illusion and we wanted that illusion to continue. When it isn’t supported, we will turn from someone who does not support it to those who do.
If we address our beliefs (9th house), we will find the sources and causes of all our insecurities, why we feel we need love. Why we feel afraid all the time, what emotions are we addicted to and why?
Sensitivity and insecurity are two different things. I was born hyper-sensitive but I was also insecure and it was my insecurities that hurt me.
Yes both ways. Been the sayer and the said-to.
It’s harder to try to address something irritating with a friend than with an acquaintance. By the time I’m irritated the thing’s got a charge to it that comes across much more potently than the issue might have warranted. Then there’s the extra hurt of the implication that the irritated person has been sitting on this irk for however long; a secret betrayal.
Anyway my irritation is usually about me, whether I can see it at the time or not. Sometimes I can find a way to expand my view to talk about it differently; sometimes not.
I get irritable really easily but try to keep my mouth shut about the small stuff. What will it matter when we’re dead?
I have had this happen both ways, too. Only once was my saying something. It was an older friend of mine when I lived in Paris. I have no idea what I said or did to her but I never heard from her again.
This Mercury/Uranus to my sun and Pluto transit is . . . quite something.
ditto this part of Isernia “It usually takes a pattern before my Pisces gets fed up.”
dunno if people don’t get over what i say (well, the off-beat humor, maybe, but nothing attacking).
it’s more than likely the REVERSE, where i internalize, then have to purposely release something said/done.
Yes. I have regrets, and hope the rest of the journey will have me with fewer regrets. I’m mostly innocent. Mostly. Adversity is teaching me to redirect my Chiron (in the 10th/Scorpio) and side-step. It takes a lifetime.
Once I said something to the new friend of an old friend (a rather pushy, but loveable old friend of about 13 years). The new friend was telling me about getting finnagled into rearranging furniture for old friend, until the wee hours. This was the night before a test and she should have been studying (we were all attending a local community college at the same time=small town/economic downturn, ya know).
I gave new friend a piece of advice -bless my Sagg asc.- by saying “Sometimes you just have to tell _____ to f*** off.” Yes, a little harsh in retrospect, but I had just gotten out of a job where I was cursing like a sailor for three years straight, and I didn’t mean it to be detrimental. But it was. New friend got drunk, then talked to old friend about it, putting her spin on it. Old friend calls me, I tell her yea, I said it, sometimes you guilt people into doing things for you, blah blah blah. Relationship was never the same.
I wish now that I had just talked to her about it in the first place, but that’s a major lesson for me; learning to confront people and call them on their bull when I think I’m being manipulated.
this happened with a scorpio. she’s been going through a rough spell and taking it out on me. i have been patient with her and letting her know when she’s gone too far. one day, she REALLY pushed me and i haven’t really talked to her for about four months. she still texts and i respond with one word answers. i don’t dislike her per se, but, i am tired of her taking her BS out on me.
I’ve more often had incredibly hurtful things said to me. I’ve gotten used to it in a sense.
I’ve been forced to deal with issues that make others very uncomfortable, and sometimes they can stick their foot in their mouth as a result. I may forgive, but I never forget.
I was pondering on this very recently. It occurred to me that I can pretty much tolerate anything anybody says and not react. I have got a thick skin for that type of things and not easy to offend at all. Except only, when I’m sick or injured and the other person knows it. I can recall two such incidences where I’d severed ties, when the other person said something which normally wouldn’t hurt, but seemed incredibly rude at the time of my vulnerability. I never forgave them for that.