Why Does Scorpio Freeze You Out, Or Amputate A Relationship?

brown scorpianSelkie writes, regarding the stereotypes of the various signs…

“…lots of Scorpios are harsh people who actually greatly enjoy judging others (even people they’ve never even met or talked to); insist on playing seemingly inexplicable games with people for years on end; take pleasure in seeing “certain” (or “certain sorts of”) people punished, and in freezing out the “unworthy,” and who are stubborn to the point of harming both themselves and others – even the people closest to them.”

The comment is out of context so check yourself if it offends you. I wanted to address the phenomena of Scorpio freezing people out. It definitely happens and it’s never been addressed on this blog.

I have been frozen out by a Scorpio. Though I’m not a Scorpio, I have enough in the eighth house I can do a pretty mean impression of one. I’ve learned to freeze people out myself. The act is an act but I would argue the motivation.

Though games are played and Scorpio withholds to manipulate and so forth, most times when Scorpio freezes someone out… amputates I would say, it is almost always an act of self-preservation. I learned this the hard way, which is probably the best way. Here’s the story:

Some years ago I had a Scorpio pal; we were friends, not lovers. He was educated and generous with me. He shared his knowledge, told me jokes, listened to me, kept me cheered and just in general supported me in many ways. He was an outstanding friend and while I always appreciated him, I taxed him greatly. I was immature at the time. I was high maintenance and I just didn’t seem to be able to understand his agony although it was expressed.

He was Jupiter rising like I am and people think we’re buoyant to the core when this is simply not the case. But anyway, he told me and told me and told me that he was suffering, but I just kept coming. I cringe when I write this but whatever. This is what I did and eventually he pulled the plug.

gold scorpianAnd he didn’t just pull the plug, either. He wrote me a passionate letter to let me know he had thought long and hard about what he was going to do. He said he had been up nights tossing but felt he had no choice but to let me pass… he just could not deal with me.

He apologized though there was not one reason why he should have, other than he knew I would feel feel pain due the separation. And he said nothing at all derogatory. He simply stated his truth. He was in pain and he felt he needed to isolate himself so he could work things through.

This was about 15 years ago. I’ve come to understand his position. You can be a kind, generous person and he was. He was mentor type and I know he liked me and valued the interaction as much as I did at one time but I was killing him. I was pretty much his entire inner circle, and while it was not my intention, I was sucking the life right out of the guy. In hindsight I would say I was freakishly greedy and insensitive and in short, this was a friend I deserved to lose.

I have since learned to consciously amputate myself and when I do I always recall the example this guy set. I make sure there is no other option because while I know the other person is going to bleed, I think it comes back on you twice as hard. In other words, though I don’t know, I’m pretty sure his pain was beyond my own.

It’s so painful when this happens in my life I don’t ever want to reattach to anyone who has pushed me to the edge where I had to detach. I just don’t trust them which is the same thing that happened with my friend. I know because I rattled his cage now and then for a number of years. He never responded and I know why. But here’s the point I want to make:

I could go on and on and about how cold this guy was shutting down the way he did. Pooooor Elsa. But fact is I did something that provoked his actions. Matter of fact I did one hundred things that provoked his actions. I’d just say if you find yourself amputated by Scorpio, you might want to check your own stuff. This is especially true if you know them to be an above board type.

Because Scorpio doesn’t (generally) explain, it’s easy to call and consider yourself their victim when you’re anything but. People are human and they have their limits and so many people ask to be cut. They beg and beg for it. They won’t stop until they’ve completely done you in and when you finally make a defensive strike, this is their cue to cry injury. Whatever. I have little sympathy. I have seen the movie only about a million times.

Have you ever been frozen out by Scorpio? Or if you are Scorpio (or a reasonable facsimile) have you ever felt yourself forced to amputate? How’s this feel on your end?



Why Does Scorpio Freeze You Out, Or Amputate A Relationship? — 253 Comments

  1. as scorpio moon, i know when i am ‘done’ with someone, i’m ‘done’. usually after being stretched beyond limits. struggling with a friend right now who is juggling multiple life issues and cannot see anything beyond her own pain. our friendship has disintegrating into her unloading and my commenting. not sure she even sees me as anything more than a free therapist. when i try to distance myself in a gentle way, she reaches out saying that she never lets her friends ‘go’. *eeek* nice for her, but it’s getting more and more difficult for me to continue. at this point, i could easily just cut ties and walk away without a second glance, leaving her wondering, i’m sure, what happened to her nice friend. in other words, in this rambling post, i think my scorpio moon nature allows me to absorb a lot more than usual,emotionally, until like an overfilled balloon i pop. then it’s too late.

    • I am Scorpio moon to I can be very sweet and moody at times I give people chances on top of chances and after awhile I can’t take it

  2. I have Venus in Scorpio and a lot of Virgo, so I like to serve and I have can handle a lot of dark stuff. But, it does get draining and I have had to let a few people go because I would hold all of their crap and they would leave me hanging with it. Most of the time that’s fine, but every once in a while, my life takes a noise dive and you are right, in self-preservation mode, I have to reserve some energy for me and they get cut off.

    Another thing I’ve noticed recently, if I can’t make the cut, sometimes the universe will step in and make the cut for me. I have one particularly draining friend that after 30 years of friendship and 10 or so years of talking to her daily, got mad at some advice I gave that she asked me to give and quit talking to me. Cold turkey for 3 months. It was at the exact time that I thought I needed her most, but now I think it was for the best. She’s recently started calling again, but I am reluctant to answer. I feel a lot better about life without her daily dumping on me.

  3. “… if you find yourself amputated by Scorpio, you might want to check your own stuff. This is especially true if you know them to be an above board type.”

    I have a friend of years and admire her ethics and ability to just Know people (she’s a scorpio with pisces moon).

    She’s amputating me since the last time I was with her. I was being way to friendly with her boyfriend, but not on purpose! (Sag moon – I smiled to much). Her boyfriend completly monopolized the conversation and kept calling my attention when what I really wanted to do was – Just be with her alone and talk to her only. I never liked him but always lied and said yeh, he’s ok. I think my friend ended up with him for fear of ending up alone. I never told her this – maybe she knew and did not like being judged – I don’t know what else could I possible done wrong. She wasn’t treating me with the same respect since, maybe, a year or so.

    To tell you the truth I don’t think in this situation I’m the one to blame, the one who did something wrong: I think that what is at stake here are her insecurities, deep ones, a jealous nature – and her venus is at the early degrees of capricorn. I don’t wanna say “it’s her fault!” – I think she’s dealing with, maybe, paranoia, jealousy… and maybe I’m being blamed. I don’t know. Anyway, my friend is really amputating me. Everytime I try to contact her she doesn’t even try to be nice. It’s ok, it hurts, but what can I do? Nothing and just accept 🙁

    Maybe this is a sign of Saturn aproaching my venus… I don’t kown.

    • I am an Aries and interested in a Scorpio he is so sweet we have being friends for quite some time and lovemaking is so beautiful I love gazing in his eyes I will do whatever this man want me to do he isn’t the typical Scorpio everybody say they are not in love yet but not to far from falling in love

  4. Wow Kashmiri, that truly sucks. Sounds like you were dealing w/one of the unevolved Scorps.

    I am a Scorpio w/Scorpio Rising & Jupiter in Scorpio as well. I have done the amputation thing – it has been with 2 long time friends who began to just take me for granted, it was always about them, and my thoughts and feelings were always either ignored or negated. I got tired of being the third wheel in my own friendships, ya know?

    I just walked away with never a word or confrontation. Just DONE.

    Horribly difficult to do and not conceived lightly, but the time was right.

    There are certain Scorps (just like other signs) who give and give and give and are very generous, and it takes a considerable amount of energy and thought to feel comfortable enough to make friends to begin with (I’m talking a HUGE EFFORT here to open up), so when one of those treasured ones that you’ve poured so much of yourself into begin to go south, it is horrifically painful to detach, but I think most of us Scorps are of the ‘rip the bandage off’ mode of thinking and try to get away in one clean tug. I think Elsa has it right in it being an act of self-preservation.

  5. I recently got rid of a co-worker who I thought was a friend. I have Moon conjunct Pluto with Saturn in Scorpio.
    My co-worker thought she could play me and use me.
    I gave her a taste of her own medicine and she’s still feeling the burn. I cut people off when they least expect it.

  6. I am a scorp and I amputate all the time. I never do it maliciously nor do I judge. Too many people have judged me and done so so wrongly that I just don’t. But I amputate and if it feels like I am freezing someone else out…why? am I not allowed to keep close to me those that I like and those that I don’t like keep them away?

  7. I’ve frozen out many people in my life. I’ve just got rid of a recent batch of so called friends whose constantly increasing needs for attention and energy from me was literally making me ill. I couldn’t take any more. Scorpio freezing is SELF PRESERVATION folks! We give more than others, that’s why people take more and if the taking becomes excessive and unbalanced, your health and sanity could be on the line.
    It never ceases to amaze me how oblivious others are to the mechanism of their relationships with scorpio types. If you always feel like a massive weight has been taken off your shoulders after a heart to heart with a scorp, that’s because you’ve simply downloaded your burdens onto their shoulders and they are now doing the intense and painful job of processing your crap for you.

    And you scorps out there, stop the free therapy sessions for all your thankless so called friends. Let people take full responsibility for their problems and learn to work them out on their own or with the help of a fully qualified psychotherapist who is PAID to do that job.
    Scorps, you think you’re doing people a favour but you’re sooo not. You’re simply supporting them in their refusal to take their emotional issues seriously enough to seek expert professional help. Why should they when they have you on tap.
    And the karmic repercussions on scorpios as they misguidedly take on problems that other people refuse to shoulder themselves are substantial, often leaving them weak, exhausted and depleted, often without a word of thanks or appreciation from their beneficiaries. It’s funny how they all remember how incredibly important you are to them when you’ve finally cut them off for good.

    • Wow, this is the greatest explanation… I do the therapy sessions for my so-called friends constantly… I am Sun Pluto in Scorpio and Scorpio Venus…But enough is enough…And Im about to cut a so-called friend that was draining me and have done a lot of s**t… and its always: Oh you are so cool, you are so great…. Well, wait until you see how uncool I can be… (Thanks Pluto transiting my first house for making me realise how much I degraded myself for unworthy people)

    • “we give more than others.”

      That doesn’t fly at all when compared to the martyr of the zodiac. I’m attracted to aspects of Scorpio women, but they definitely take a LOT more out of me than I do them. Everybody does.

      • The Martyr of the zodiac? You are Pisces I suppose. I am married to one. I think we give and take equally.

        Don’t clump all sun signs together. Its just bad astrology.

    • Totally agree. It IS self preservation, literally a survival instinct. Sometimes I feel like there are people out there who are psychic vampires and just take and take and take…devoid of love, and can’t give anything back. I REMOVE MYSELF from their influence in my life.

  8. My scorpio rising bowling league friend foze me out of her life last spring. Stopped sending me emails, stopped calling, quit bowling,everything. I still have no idea why and I will probably never try to find out because I hate confrontations (Pisces asc). She was a bossy Leo sun who thought she knew how everyone else should live their life (even though her life was fucked up on the verge of divorce, overwieght and miserable unless high or drunk) I say Who needs that bullshit!! (Capricorn sun)

  9. Regardless of the rights and wrongs of Scorpio ‘freezing’, I just want to say, it’s still scary as hell!

    I’ve been on the end of one and yes, it was partly brought on by my own behaviour, and it may be self-preservation on the Scorpio’s part, but it doesn’t negate the fact that the reluctance to talk things through before freezing gives the other person no option. Self-preservation it may be, but it’s also a power thing, a way of having the last (non-)word, if you like. I’ve loads of Sag and Gemini and Scorpio freezing is scary, frustrating and debilitating sometimes.

    I’ve since re-established contact with the Scorp (partly cos he has has Libra rising and is a bit more conciliatory), but the old issues are never raised, and consequently never resolved. I’ve learnt to accept it and to accept my own need for resolution without projecting it on the other person.

    This is a dilemma I’ve never been able to resolve – when is talking too much, and when is not-talking too little? Ah well, we fumble through the best we can.

    • I had to amputate my Scorpio mother to keep my sanity. She was giving me asilent calls, made me paranoid and I lost many friends because of it. The worst part is that I confided in her and she said nothing. Until one day I confronted her when I knew it couldn’t be anyone else but her. There were other things like, she wasn’t interested in what’s m what’s been happening into my life but dump her stuff while we are on the telephone. When I was having a lot of problems but she had no sympathies for me. There was no point in talking to result these issues as she would not change. So there you have it. You might like to have talked it through but there are times there is no point.

  10. I’m not a Sun Scorpio, but I have Venus/Pluto conjunct (in Virgo). I’m the same way with overly needy people. I amputated one a few years ago. Frightening because the woman was, unfortunately for me, dense, and I had to plunge the knife in without any painkiller to finally get rid of her.

    She craves drama and having people around her, and, well, I don’t. I’ve also amputated a lot of strongly Cancerian types right out of my life for the same reason. All that ickiness makes my skin crawl. I’d rather not deal with it, so I freeze those kinds of people out.

  11. jj — you are so right about scorpios stepping back and suggesting to people that they seek professional help. i’ve mentioned it to my friend, time and again and she has a gazillion excuses from ‘not wanting to do the work’ (YOU don’t want to do the work, you just want ME to do it for you…) to ‘i can’t afford it’ (this from someone who is set for life *sigh*), it’s too bad, we’ve been very close over the years, and of course, there’s that scorpio loyalty, but i just can’t take it any more (and ironically, one of her biggest issues is that she’s alienating family and friends and can’t/won’t understand why)

  12. I’ve been frozen by a scorpio friend – she was an internet friend and I also had visited her once for a weekend. Online I cut her bad, inadvertantly hitting her most sensitive spot. So she wrote to me about how it hurt her and never talked to me again.

    I have a really good scorpio friend now. And she had to cut out all of her friends at one point. Then years later she met me. And the things she worried about bothering me due to her past, didn’t bother me a bit. Apparently her old friends would put her down and drain her energy.

  13. My husband has a stellium in Scorpio including the sun. What I have noticed is that he doesn’t suffer fools easily, unless they’re his friends! Then he suffers them for way too long! (some of the stellium is opposite Saturn in Taurus, maybe that’s why)

    I’m thinking of one guy in particular who was a total loser. Treated his wife like crap. Treated my hubby like crap too. He stuck with him until one night it got so bad he just said “you are RUDE!” and dropped him off at his house and never ever spoke to him again. That guy deserved it.

  14. i don’t know if it’s my 8th house (i don’t have personal scorpio planets… just uranus.)

    but if someone is wounding me and i don’t have any expectation of them stopping, i will cut them out.
    sometimes only until i can feel i can bear it again. depending on whether it’s something malicious or just crosswired needs (i can’t always hold those sorts of pain against someone.)

    i usually don’t say why. unless i actually see a hope that they’d actually want to resolve the situation. or if it’s a final close and i want to make it extremely clear that they’re unwelcome in my life (which i try to be nice about but there’s not many gentle ways of saying that.)

    my scorpio stellium friend likes to understand people. it’s an obsession, i guess, to dissect how people tick. she’ll focus on someone for awhile, and then, when she’s reached a certain point she might realize that they’re… toxic, or dangerous, or projecting all over her, or whatever, and tries to pull back, and people get upset, feel they’re getting cut off (since they’re used to that scorpio focus and can feel the bounceback when it lifts) overreact, and make her feel like she has no other choice but to cut them off completely. (and she can get harsh. likely too harsh.)
    anyway, that’s how she describes it.

  15. Scorpio ASC….I’ve done this to a handful of friends. I’ve said in another post I get these friends who end up being clingy/needy/jealous, it just drives me nuts. I try to stick it out with them, and I’m even honest about how they make me feel (like I have a super-jealous boyfriend on my hands), but if they don’t get the point then I have to let it go. I never related it to my Scorpio ASC but wow, it’s true, each one drained the hell out of me. When I reached a point of maturity, I realized that as much as I hate to hurt anybody, these relationships were very toxic and flat out unecessary. I never have intended to freeze people off completely, but instead wait until they mature themselves. Oh yeah, and my Saturn is in the 11th.

  16. Kashmiri–No, it makes me look like an insensitive clod. 😉 Now I know why I never attracted Cancer or Pisces men. (Scorpios, that’s another story. Hubby is Scorp rising.) Not only am I blunt, I’m not a cling-on.

    I honestly don’t think male Cancer or Pisces types would go for a Leo Sun, Sun conjunct Mars, and Aries rising. 😉 Just generalizing, of course, but it’s telling that I never dated any.

  17. “…most times when Scorpio freezes someone out… amputates I would say, it is almost always an act of self-preservation.”

    Maybe so, but I have to question the validity of Scorpios’ every perception that they NEED to preserve themselves. Sometimes they’re just afraid – yes, even a Scorpio!(I mean, I know one who, after hearing about the film, “I Am Curious [Yellow]” way back in 1967 has flatly shunned all things, ideas and people Swedish – because they’re “sexually immoral”! And I’m NOT exaggerating.) Sometimes it’s flat-out selfish – an attempt to control someone else. I have a choice example; I apologize for its length, but I’m hoping that Elsa and/or any of you out there can tell me if, or where, I’m wrong!

    If you’ve ever seen or read Edith Wharton’s “The Age of Innocence,” my mother-in-law is the same type of person as the character of “May,” who was surely modeled on a Scorpio woman. (In fact, if you want an example of what the Scorpionic freeze-out can do to the lives of everyone around them, without the Scorpio ever once being anything short of gracious and polite, read “The Age of Innocence.”)

    When I was first introduced to my boyfriend’s mother (now my husband since 1992) she came into the room, barely shook my hand, was very polite – then disappeared into the back of the house for the rest of the evening. My husband mentioned (-only then! He hadn’t thought it important..)that she didn’t approve of people who were overweight, which I was. OK; everybody’s entitled to their own opinion. Between that and the fact that she clearly sensed that her son was serious about me (first woman he’d brought home who fit that description), from that night on, I DID… NOT… EXIST. No, seriously – even when we went on to live together, my existence was never even referred to, period. For more than a decade! (BTW, I got along great with his father, who was as nice as could be.)

    I knew I certainly hadn’t done anything wrong – in fact, this lady had never even talked to me beyond polite intros, so I went along with it. Whenever she asked my husband to come for holidays & birthdays (always with no mention of me, & very pointedly, so both he & I would “get it”) I encouraged him to go; I think family’s important.

    Eventually, we moved about 120 miles away; in the first couple of years, it was still the same deal with her. Just before one Thanksgiving, out of the blue, my husband’s FATHER called up to apologize for “their” awful behavior toward me and to invite me for Thanksgiving dinner that year.

    I went; my “acknowlegement” by my husband’s mom consisted of her acting as if nothing had ever happened,as though I’d always been warmly welcomed by her, and certainly with no hint that her husband had called and actually apologized. And so it’s been ever since! My husband and I never acknowleged to her that she had frozen me out from first meeting through the ensuing twelve years, and neither did she. I wish I could say I was always perfectly gracious, but I did have a bit of a reservoir of anger built up about being judged & frozen out like that for so long, and in the first couple of years it came out every so often in stupid little indirect ways I now regret. But I’m long over it. My in-laws have been wonderful to me in so many ways for years now. Everything’s been fine for a long time… well, as far I my husband and I can really tell with a Scorpio. (Just a JOKE.)

    My mother-in-law lost years of what could have been a close relationship with her son and his wife – for what? Unlike some Scorpios, I don’t think you can or should try & control who your kids decide to love, what they decide to work at, etc. (and that’s a whole ‘nother story about this lady and her family). I mean, offer parental opinions, talk with them, etc, but when you have to let go of it, let go – right? (Wrong?)

    But she still runs constant Scorpionic “scams” on her own family, though apparently I’m now exempt. Example: She’s extremely afraid of anything new but won’t admit that, even to herself, so when her husband got a cell phone & wanted to get one for her (for safety’s sake), she sweetly pronounced that NO ONE needed a cell phone – and just as sweetly refused to take the phone # of her own husband’s cell! She still refuses – on some “priciple” is all my husband & I can figure -and recently had a plan to force a family member into a completely arbitrary event of her creation, that he’d SAID he did not want to (and what’s more, couldn’t) attend – and ended up screwing it up HERSELF all because she couldn’t call her husband on the road when she needed to!

    Scorpios (& those who are heavily influenced by the 8th house and/or Pluto) are often incredibly wise, loyal people, and have traits that I admire greatly (and wish I had!). But, like May Welland Archer, they often have a self-induced, hard blindness and resistence to admitting the very existence of anything – or anyone – not to their liking! Other signs all have their failings, too. But Scorpio can really make sure it HURTS, if so inclined, though when done out of selfishness, it often ends up hurting them just as badly. I just wished it could be mentioned among all the praise, that’s all.

    Am I wrong?

    • Edith Wharton’s “The Age of Innocence” is my all time favorite movie.

      May is certainly not a Scorpio. She cannot fulfill Newland’s desires for an emotional life or intellectual stimulation, but she does symbolize the perfect wife and marriage partner for his social class and time.

      There isn’t a Scorpio alive that would live an emotionless life with a man that truly loves another woman. A Scorpio woman would leave him and live alone. The Scorpio in the movie is Ellen. Not May. Ellen, the Countess Olenska, fulfills Newland’s longing for an emotional fantasy life. And, is in love with him but cant have him so, she would rather be alone. That is a Scorpio.

      May was a Capricorn. Her husband the cheater, A Sag.

      You asked someone to tell you if you were wrong. Based on this movie, you are wrong. And, its common for in laws to dislike each other. That’s where all the mother in law jokes came from.

      May loved her husband. What her husband and her cousin were doing was shitty. He proposed to May. He married her. Ellen (who was also married) had no business going near her cousin’s fiancé and then husband. And, she did the right thing by leaving when she learned May was pregnant. May told her cousin she was pregnant because that Capricorn was not going to lose her husband or her place in society. Standing in society means much more to a cap than it ever would to a Scorpio. Typical Sag husband….out fooling around….

      I’m quite certain I have this right 🙂 (favorite movie) (and I have 5 planets in Scorpio)

  18. Ah now I feel like a bastard.
    I do think Scorpio’s are, when above board and solid, generally right when they cut. But I also want to stick by my projection thing, because I’ve seen scorpio’s even above board do that too.

    I mentioned being cut twice by the one scorpio in the other post and its true, the first time I was told (years later) it hadn’t actually happened (although that leaves me rather confused about the unanswered calls and emails), and the second time I was told I was right about what I’d thought/felt/the situation and it was the closest to an apology I got.

    In the end in that particular case I still get so much richness out of the relationship that I opt to continue even at risk of being taken down again, in fairness I don’t think going down either time did me long term harm because I was right (whereas if I had been wrong I think it might have done me good) but its definitely made me super cautious about how I communicate with this person. I have an even higher degree of paranoia and fear of judgement and unless I can communicate face to face and see and feel her reaction I pretty much toe my way like its eggshells.

    • LMFAO.. ?? Yeah, we do this! To be honest, this is how we process an offense or slight! We need to remove you out of the equation and then go within to dissect your actions.. If you were right then we’ll let you back in… But, if you approach us in the same manner again you’re back on the outs..and the process repeats itself!! Lol???

      • Yes…this is true…I have Scorpio in the Sun and a Scorpio Rising and I am excellent at “the cut off!”…I have had family that claimed they “loved” me and fake ass friends that I demoted to “non factors” (Evelyn from Basketball Wives) after I gained serious amounts of weight and once I cut their asses off…I lost about 200 lbs over a period of time. Then these dumbasses tried to have me hospitalized, by claiming me crazy for cutting them out of my life. They talked so much shit…and kept doing more shit to the point of even having my children taken from me through Child Protective Services here in the State of Michigan…Yet these are the same weirdos that said I needed therapy and “help” from a professionally trained and certified Psychologist and now even a Psychiatrist because I cut them off and lost weight without any diets or surgeries..I am a natural athlete and professionally and street trained dancer…so the weight comes off quickly for ME..especially when I implement “the cut off”…I think these people are sick and in much need of serious mental help being all up in my business! They talked shit when I gained weight and they still talk shit now even after I lost weight and are insisting that I be around them even to the point of pulling a fake ass eviction and “superimposing”(Hayes-Bey, Maurice A.) Community Living Arrangements through various scenarios living with the same talking shit family members and homeless shelters!…However, being the “Queen of The Cut Off”…I have learned from my own grandmothers and aunties how to cut people off in their faces when I am being forced to assimilate with the same violators of my human rights to not be bothered with them…and forced assimilation is illegal by they way…These weirdos need to “get a clue”(Graham, Leigh) and realize once a Scorpio is done with you..that is pretty much it! I really appreciate this forum..so we continue to discuss different scenarios of “the cut off”…whether you guys have been victims of “the cut off” or you are the one doing “the cut off” yourselves…us Scorpio are ruthless like that..with explanation.. especially after we have been good friends or family to the “victims”…I have been there and extremely loyal to these people to my own detriment to the point of homelessness and still homelessness and assisting with social responsibility without hardly any thank yous from these same ingrates…smh

  19. My Scorpio freeze-out story goes like this….I am having breakfast at the company cafeteria with a table of women,one is a stunning Swedish Scorpio,just having given birth to her first child several months before.She is tall,dark,looks VERY much like Ingred Bergman.She is nursing so her curves are extra curvy,she is at the height of her feminine powers.The guy who trains the bomb sniffing dogs walks in and says a happy hello to her-now comes the freeze-she straightens up in her cafeteria chair,shoots a look at him out of the corner of her eye,kinda sideways,with this kind of seething vibe and turns her back to him,without a word being spoken.Full-on,turning away,freezing out,and as she repositions herself,she kind of sways hers hips in this kinda seductive exclamation point at the end of the sentence.No one else at the table is noticing this little beheading going on except me and the dog trainer.She has the tiniest little smile on one side of her lips.I look back at the dog trainer and he is devastated.I know this guy and he is a pushy Leo type,now completely wilted.If I had a Geiger counter it would be going off.She has just fried him.He is speechless.No one else is seeing this but me.I know her husband was friends with the trainer,but I never did ask what it was all about.I was in awe of the whole energy of the exchange.It stays in my memory as an example of the Scorpio freeze out.This happened 15 years ago and I still remember this vividly.One other thing,so many Scorpios out there!Who knew you were all watching so quietly until your question was asked.

  20. Thank you, Elsa! I wasn’t tryin to villify Scorpios, just balance out what I’d been reading for several months! My MIL really isn’t crazy; she’s just a very extreme version of the negative Scorpio’s tendency to judge too quickly then stubbornly stick to it because, well, she sees it as a sign of weakness to back down & admit she was wrong (or even that she MIGHT have been wrong)! She’s actually turned out to be a very good-hearted person who just has a rather extreme & overly fearful reaction to anything (or anyone) she considers a threat, for whatever reason.

    Having had a negative Scorpio mom who ended up cutting herself off from everyone in her life (except me) via that same stubbornness, I’ll admit I’m a bit oversensitized to the overly quick judgement and almost gleeful freezing out that can be found in a negative Scorpio/8th house/Pluto-influenced person.

    BTW, just for the heck of it, yesterday I asked one of the other Scorpios I mentioned in my post (… who’s been despising/rejecting all things & persons Swedish for decades now due to what she HEARD about the film “I Am Curious[Yellow]”) whether she’d consider ever buying anything from IKEA – she said she absolutely wouldn’t; it’s a SWEDISH company! 😀

  21. Umm – this may be surprising – both my Scorpio mother and step-mother have done the same, shunning / making a scene over houseguests. It’s kind of funny from my perspective because I could see how they acted (including those times they were civil to houseguests) and what they said / really felt after they left. Reality: they don’t want dreaded outsiders who haven’t passed a security check in their homes. It added a special spice (read: distrust) knowing my step-mother was doing the same thing (racking me and my sister over the coals) when we weren’t in front of her.

    Well, come to think of it, she did it when we *were* there too, when she couldn’t contain her venom…

  22. Venus, Moon, Neptune conjunct in Scorpio for me. I think that most (not all) Scorpio’s have this ability to see straight through a person’s facade thereby eliminating the need to build relationships based on superficial needs. They just don’t have the ability to live on the surface so when it comes time to end a relationship there is no other recourse but amputation. I mean, really, what is the purpose of hanging on to an arm that has gangrene? I can see that is is rotten beyond reform. The person next to me can smell it and the next door neighbor has already alerted the neighborhood to my condition. What’s left to do?
    Ahhh, Scorpio’s are realistic and not afraid of the truth I’d dare to say. I don’t see it as “freezing” one out or even being mean. It is just not a healthy habit to hang on to parts that are causing the rest of the body harm….and a Scorpio understands the effects of festering decay like no one else.
    I like amputation. It is clean, quick and healthy for all involved…whether they know it or not at the time.
    While I feel for those on the receiving end of the scalpel I can only wonder what compels them to put themselves “under the knife”?
    What do you think, Elsa?

  23. Nobody asked me but I decided this topic isn’t dead. 🙂

    Part of the issue with this amputating phenomenon is there’s other people involved besides the two in a relationship .. like, children. I remember the quiet tow-headed boy of one of my friend’s married to a Scorpio looking out the window waiting for his dad to come home .. and his dad wasn’t going to come home, he had wandered off and impregnated another woman. (Or was it two? I don’t remember all the florid details of the relationship unraveling – but eventually it dispersed with a bang.) First he put them into debt via his purchasing ‘services’ at s&m sex parlors.

    Still .. that friend wanted to keep the Scorpio. I don’t understand it either. They leave a void and I think it’s natural, human, to take the step into it and towards them.

    Who has tips / techniques for not stepping into the void (I suspect they’re getting energy when you do that you know)? Think I’ll need them for Pluto transiting the 7th.

  24. i have a scorpio ascendant, sun in scorpio conjunct pluto in the 12th house. i had to cut off people from my life from time to time, most of them i was able to heal, although things were never the same as they started.

    jesus helped me to open my heart to possibility of almost complete forgiveness. when i found my life was lacking direction, it was by calling jesus into my heart that things started to lighten up. i bagan to think and pray for those who dont eat, those who are ill, etc. yes, i do find this corny when i’m back to my normal state. but in these brief moments, i seem to no longer think about those who have done me wrong or i dont like, etc. it is like i’m temporarily released from all my hatred and all i want is peace.

  25. Just curious: Why does scorpio tolerate so much crap that they eventually need to amputate in such a dramatic way? Why not just ask for the offensive behavior to stop when it occurs, and save themselves a lot of abuse (and the other person the pain of amputation)? It seems that scorpio tends to create the ideal conditions for amputation to be an appropriate response. Cause and effect?

    • As a Virgo Sun with Pluto conjunct my Sun in my 8th house, with Mercury, Mars, and Pluto in my 8th, Gemini Moon squared to Pluto. And Venus, Jupiter, and Neptune in Scorpio……

      I guess we think people should intuit when we need our space. I froze a friend out because she was trying to man handle me and she acted like a werebeast! I could not take anymore and that was that! Over…done….!

      Plutonians don’t truly do the confrontational thing like fire signs. We slink off to rage in private and act like the offender does not exist anymore. We rant and rage and possible smash things in private, but put on a straight face for the public eye. And we do want the people around us to read our minds, body language, etc. Because we can definitely read others.

  26. Goodness this is so true, your statements and how Scorpio will eventually cut off the ties to those who have caused them enough grief. And in answer to the last comment from Ana, as to why we tolerate so much that we eventually need to amputate in such a dramatic and final way?

    Because we must. Sensitive water signs can absorb so much shock, so much upheaval, so many intrusions and acquiesce seemingly forever without end, like the rivers which unceasingly flow into the ocean, or the lake where you can throw rocks and more rocks and still the lake stands unhindered after the ripples subside.

    Yet there is a limit to everything. At times it is necessary to dam the river to keep from drying up. And the dam once erected will not give way so easily as much thought was given to putting it in place.

    It is wise to not push your luck with a Scorpion since they keep tabs on the factors weighing against your favour and once a bridge is burned, there is no turning back.

  27. I am in the process of freezing someone out at this time, and yes, it is difficult on my part.

    A new-found cousin, about four years ago,from Sweden who has visited already twice, announced a few days ago, via internet, that she was planning a “one week or so” trip to us in May. We didn’t mind meeting the first or second time, but it is really an inconvenience on our family. She didn’t even consider that we didn’t want her to visit and put us out again, and now for a whole week.

    Besides the inconvenience, she (She’s a November Sagittarius) is totally obnoxious. She brags, isn’t interested in a two-way conversation, and is quite insulting to me.

    I think part of her problem is that “European Snobbery” so prevalent over there. While here, she made a plain ordinary chicken dinner, held it up on a platter, and acted as though we had never seen real food. When she stopped at my house, she asked me to turn my computer on, then proceeded to teach me how to use it; I had had a computer for over 12 years at that time. I politely let her teach me. In fact, I have been politely letting her be who she is. She emailed me to have me clean up an English version of her bio. It took me 12 hours. Then she informs me that she writes English very good. Grrrr! Could have fooled me. She bakes bread, sends a pic, and the recipe–of course assuming I had never baked bread, which having been a house wife for 30 years, I have and do bake quite well thank you.

    Anyway, my father was really upset at the thought of her visiting again. He would have felt obligated to pick up her hotel costs and commented, “I feel like this just fell out of the blue and the worse part, I’m the one who will have to entertain her for a week.”

    What did I do? After a day or so of fretting about this, I just decided to be honest (well not entirely honest–that would have been really cruel). I e-mailed her and told her that this trip to the US is not possible at this time and gave her a variety of honest reasons. Told her that if our situation here changes at some point in the future, we could maybe plan a trip for her.

    Afterwards I deleted her from my e-addresses. I will no longer answer her e-mails. She cut off!

  28. Just found this topic (I need to spend more time exploring this site)….

    I have the ability (as I think most Scorpios do) to compartmentalize aspects of my life: things get stuffed into a compartment and left there until I have the time (or desire) to open it back up and deal with it. Some compartments stay sealed up for a very long time. It is a coping mechanism I learned (discovered?) while very young.

    I have placed several people/relationships, including family members, into sealed compartments. It was never something done impulsively. As Victoria stated, there was no other alternative: I felt my survival — emotional and mental — was at stake.

    As far as it being done abruptly… well it may appear so to the other people involved but there’s always significant history behind the decisions. And yeah, we’d drag all the crap out and re-hash it over and over and never get anywhere. When people are irrational and can’t hear what you’re saying, what’s the point in continuing?

    Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity. –Albert Einstein

  29. Wow!! I had no idea Freezing was such a universal Scorpio technique. I guess I have seen my mother(scorp sun, pluto in the 8th) freeze people out of her life for years, but I never connected it with what I do. I have Sun, moon, mercury, venus, and mars in Scorpio, so it’s hard for me to define were the Scorpio energy is coming from sometimes.

    Freezing is most defiantly a tool of survival and self preservation. I use to feel guilty about doing it, but I have grown to realize it’s best for everyone involved if I do what I need to do.

    For me, Freezing gives me the time and space I need to cool down, and sort out the feelings that lead to the freeze.. The time and space help me to refrain from descending into petty power trips, or doing something I might regret, etc… when the wounds are still raw. It also allows the Scorpio time to re-define themselves…..

    I like to think of it as putting myself in cold storage. Most people I have frozen over the years were only blocked out of my life wile I healed and came to terms with my feelings. In recent years I have warned romantic partners and very close business associates at the beginning of the relationship that complete isolation and cutting off all communication is how I operate when I am extremely wounded…. But I also add that I am usually open to re-defining the relationship down the road, when I am ready…… I am close friends or on speaking terms with most of my ex-lovers. Good friends are hard to find and life is too short to hold a grudge forever(is that Jupiter in the 1st speaking??)…..

  30. So I read many of the comments here and although there certainly are some valid points being made, I really don’t think this general “rule of thumb” applies to all Scorpions. As they say, it all depends on the specific chart and personal transits.

    “Freezing out” is a final tactic reserved for when totally finished with someone because you consider them a wasted investment of your precious time and energy as in a total write-off. So you cut your losses, and carry on with your life as if they never existed in the first place.

    I don’t think that “freezing out” is a temporary measure at all. Leave this feeble cop-out manoeuver to the unevolved Scorpion who is not yet aware of how to deal with a hurtful situation in true Scorpionic fashion.

    As a triple Scorp with Moon, Pluto and Scorpio rising I haven’t too much experience with people wasting my time but admittedly have been hurt a couple times very badly.

    I didn’t “freeze” those ladies out. That would have been too easy. Plus it would have been the easy way out for them. Do you really think a Scorpion would let someone who has hurt them badly off so easily? Hardly.

    When people hurt you, betray your sacred trust or abuse your love and friendship, the thing to do is hang around the sidelines in the shadows for awhile. Let them think that you froze them out by making yourself somewhat scarce, yes, but remain everpresent and in control behind the scenes. Your spirit lingers. Your invisible presence and ominous energy remains unscathed. Your ghost succumbs to wreaking continual havoc veiled in at times subtle, at times outrageous, activity executed at inopportune occasions.

    For it follows that when these offending parties expect you to freeze them out, you are doing them a favor by doing so. This is not revenge, this is foolishly fulfilling their expectation!

    The evolved Scorpion never plays to another trumpeter’s tune. A true lone wolf, the Scorpion marches to the beast (beat) of his own drummer. They devise their own strategy and avoid the obvious. They lurk in the shadows of subtility and seductive selective madness.

    The whole idea is that your traitors and abusers feel false security in thinking you will not bother with revenge and that you will forget the matter by simply “freezing them out.”

    No, as a bonafide certified triple Scorpion (quadruple if you include my ascendant) I believe the best way to deal with such horrible people is to torment them. Aim below the belt. Knife behind the back. Get them where they deserve it, when they least expect it.

    Get these mortal offenders so paranoid, they are constantly expecting you to pop out of the shadows and out of the murky water like a gator lurking in the slime of their subconscious ready to devour.

    This is the time to disappear and do more important things and carry on with your life with more worthy individuals. You can always return to check up on the abhorrent offenders at a later date and more convenient time. At which point you can monitor their stress and anxiety-o-meter and devise an even more poisonous and deadly arrow to hit the mark, again, waiting for the moment they least expect it.

    This cycle can continue for however long you wish. Remember, the true Scorpio is a master of manipulation and control. I will never date or ask a Scorpio woman out for this reason. No matter how attractive or sensual or sexual she may be it is simply not worth the headache.

    And because she is a woman, she will beat the Scorpio man at his own game as she is master of it. Women do not play fair. To the male mind, the female response is entirely emotional and frequently irrational. Simply put, she will catch you off guard and manipulate you to fulfill her own pleasure in beating you at your own game.

    (Re: Jupiter in the 1st house, well that just means you are big on yourself or have an exaggerated overinflated self-image)

  31. “Remember, the true Scorpio is a master of manipulation and control.”

    First Degree Burn,

    I don’t disagree with your statement I quoted above, but I think the expression of manipulation and control can take many forms in expressing Scorpio energy.

    I love to manipulate material objects and transform them into art or functional objects. I prefer to bend people to my will using genuine kindness and honesty.

    As for control, I prefer to exert control over my self, and my reactions to hurtful situations.

    I have preformed a few perminant amputations over the years. I have no regrets because the people I froze out of my life were holding me back or damaging to me.

    When I freeze someone at the end of a relationship it’s for the purpose of coming back to myself and giving me space so I don’t act out in a way I might regret. I have great respect and love for most of the women I have had romantic relationships with. In most cases my love for my ex’s has never gone away. It just transformed from romantic intimate love, to universal/friend love. For me, holding a grudge, and seeking retribution or revenge is a waste of my energy. It does not feed my soul to punish people for hurting me. The way I see it, it takes two to tango and when two people choose to be in a relationship they are choosing to open themselves up to each other. If you end up getting hurt, or betrayed, those are consequences of choosing to open up to that person. Betrayal sucks, but we have a choice in how we react to it. I do have instincts to punish/sting people when they hurt me, but my experience has taught me it’s an inefficient use of my energy, and does more damage than good…

    I also believe “an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind” -Mahatma Gandhi

    “(Re: Jupiter in the 1st house, well that just means you are big on yourself or have an exaggerated overinflated self-image)” quoting First Degree Burn

    No doubt! I do think highly of myself!! 🙂

    • I’m a Scorpio rising with Pisces Sun and Jupiter in the first house. I used to freeze people out when i was younger all the time. Im known for it but I feel not without good reason and always at the end of my tether about dealing with something that doesn’t change despite trying many different ways. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learnt more mature creative ways of dealing with people but at the time that was all I knew. In one easy step my problem was solved. Good bye. It was definitely a self preserving mechanism. I probably still do it but in much more subtle ways, just ignoring someone when they speak is freezing them out in my opinion. I think highly of myself but I also think as highly of other people so feel its ok.

      • Yep I freeze people out simply by giving them the stink eye and then ignoring them. They can FEEL they are not wanted in my presence, and so they amputate themselves. But I don’t let people walk on me anymore nor do I tolerate their BS. If I have a issue I speak my mind about it. That’s why people think Scorpio’s are mean, because we speak our minds and it comes off as rude. A scorp does NOT care if you think they are rude. We gave you or opinion, take it or leave it.

  32. “complete isolation and cutting off all communication is how I operate when I am extremely wounded…. But I also add that I am usually open to re-defining the relationship down the road, when I am ready……”

    Does this occur when someone intentionally hurts you or when their presence triggers pain in you for some unrelated reason, past issues, etc.? Just curious, as this happened to me twice last year. As much as I have thought it over I cannot find anything I could have done to either of them. Both wanted to be close to me for a long time and I was slow/cautious to let them in and once I did things were great…then they both got scared or something, shut down and left with no explanation. Perplexed me (and hurt me) to no end. But I guess it is to be expected as I currently have Pluto transiting my moon in the 7th.

    Re: Jupiter in the 1st – it’s good to think highly of oneself 😉

  33. Ana,

    I have amputated people out of my life without communicating anything, but when I do this it is someone who seriously wronged me.

    When I freeze someone out at the end of a romantic relationship I communicate my intentions and reasoning behind them.

    When it comes down to it, we all handle things in different ways. I was raised by pacifists, and my dad encouraged me to study Buddhist and Sufi philosophy starting at age 12, so a lot of my coping mechanisms are rooted in a philosophy of non-violence and not harming others……

  34. I really think this is a more complex issue than simply freezing someone out. Eventually that ice will melt(metaphorically), don’t forget Scorpio is a water sign. I think the hard task is figuring out when people should be forgiven. I have experienced having people really hurt me, unintentionally or no, and then try to come back in my life, no communication whatsoever for many years, once I was doing really really well, and I assume they wanted somthing from me… What more could I possibley have that you haven’t already taken?!! The funny thing is I usually let them back in, as long as there is no foul play… that is I errect firm boundaries and then don’t allow them any closer. I can admire your seek for answers on a spiritual level, as somtimes i feel that this is the only place answers will be found.

  35. Des,

    I learned how to forgive and let go and process my anger over a 15+ year period. I know what it’s like to sting people and take revenge when someone betrays me, but I never found these effective tools in getting my needs met. Hurting people that hurt me just made me hurt more… I have a lot of empathy, it’s a blessing and a curse… I feel pain I inflict on others, and it sucks… The empathy also facilitates forgiveness, because I can understand were the other person is coming from, or at least I try to. I also strongly believe in the golden rule, “treat others as you would like to be treated.”…..

    I don’t allow every person I forgive back into my life. I won’t forget what the person did, But I won’t hold on to the anger associated with the incident…. we are all human and we all fuck up, so it goes….. unprocessed/repressed emotions are like thrones in my being, I will feel it until I deal with it…

  36. Scorpio rising. I don’t freeze people out much, but once we’re done, we’re done. I think the only person I’ve consciously tried to freeze in the last five years is my last ex, because despite him being a Scorpio, he e-mails me yearly. And I just don’t want to know how badly he is doing any more. I e-mailed him back once when I was in a good mood and have regretted doing it ever since. I should have stonewalled better.

    My most painful freeze out was by an Aquarian, but it was pretty similar to Elsa’s in that I was clearly smothering and clingy and crazy and well, deserved to get the freezeout. I can’t blame him, really, though I certainly hated him for years on end.

  37. jj you say it:
    “Scorpio freezing is SELF PRESERVATION folks! We give more than others, that’s why people take more and if the taking becomes excessive and unbalanced, your health and sanity could be on the line.”

    That’s exacly the scorpio point.

    I’m a scorpio mars and I did amputate.
    I amputated my own father because his issues were mirroring mine. I’ts terrible.
    When the energy between me and the other goes downward, I see the end is coming, and I do it myself.
    I was amputated as well, and even tough I can assume there was a reason, I do wish it didn’t happen.
    truth is : being amputated by a scorpio hurts ( more than getting the same treatment from other) because it always means something.
    other sign might just lose theyr interest on you or they might be too much in to themself.
    The scorpio stays with you because and as long as he understands YOU.
    And it hurts to be taken away such a gift.

  38. I have Scorpio rising conjunct Neptune and will amputate if I feel it is my only possible escape route, but I don’t generally let things devolve to that point if I can help it. Funny, right now I am going thru a forced amputation from my mother-in-law who’s got Scorpio moon as part of a grand cross in her chart. But amputating people from her life seems to be a recurrent theme for her.

  39. I am a scorpio rising. Question: Why do you stop eating at a meal at a certain point? Because you’re done. You usually have no feelings about being done, you just know you don’t want anymore. Thus, how it is with me. It’s usually a pretty emotionless process, though I feel bad that I don’t feel worse. I’ve hurt people this way, and they’ve done the whole victim thing. Maybe justifiably. But if I’m done, I’m done and I really don’t feel like trying to care anymore.
    How’s that for cold?

  40. I’m only speaking for myself and as a Plutonian (though I do have Juno and Uranus in Scorpio), but if any so-called friend decides to make me a target of drama (even just implying nasty things about me but not said out loud), I amputate, end of story. Some times this has to do with a number of previous issues I’ve had with them though, but my tolerance of asshatery is very low, especially after my Saturn Return.

    I don’t think Plutonians or Scorpios always do at last resort, and I think a lot of the times has to do with a mixture of difficulty of verbalizing all the issues they had with the other person (fo r me it sometimes takes years), and a desire to avoid future conflicts, which would be very nasty if they held on to those relationships.

    (Pluto aspecting Sun, Moon, Mercury, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune, Ascendant, Midheaven, Eros, Eris, Ixion, and etc; Saturn, Vesta, Orcus, Amor in the 8th house)

  41. Scorpio rising – I ampute people who don’t understand. The last one was supposed to be my friend. Yet she thought I would arrange a meeting and not show up. she was the one who changed at the last moment the place and didn’t even bother check if I was where we agreed.So I was stand waiting in cold. Before that I amputed my mother – there’s not forgiveness here. You hurt me well right back at you. I rather be alone than with mean or stupid people!

    • I also “would rather be alone than with mean and stupid people”….and I do not see anything wrong with it.

  42. I have not said anything before on this blog so I would love to do so now!

    As an Aries I have a tendency of minding my own business. I have also been in the middle of a bad Pluto transit and several Saturn ones so that’s the only business I can and should mind. So when I lived with a Sagittarius + heavy, heavy Scorpio influence I was fast to cut myself off from that before the living situation was even over.

    She wanted total control of the household and was a non-master at lying right out of her teeth when the lying would “preserve” her at that given moment. She definitely set up an veil of invisibility in the household. My Cancer boyfriend could not come in sometimes because the vibe was so nasty.

    Anyway, throughout that whole situation I never understood what she had against me. It only started when we lived together. We were friends before. But later she let me know. It was just simple things to do with the way that I live, which have little to no effect on her, especially when we barely had the same schedules. I guess I am a no bullshit kind of gal. I had cut off any business in the household and used it for sleeping. Eventually I found that wasting anymore energy on her and the house was bad for me as I was struggling with college classes, my art (which suffered) and working as much as possible.

    At the end it blew up because her lies came back at her. I ended up losing a few bucks out of it but overall I came out okay (but have been needing to take ample time to recover, to make sure I don’t attract someone else the same again.)

    Sadly, the details of everything are too long! I am 22 and this is the last person I am living with for a long time. Just think of every “roommate” thing that may bother someone.

    I guess the Scorpio cutting off or the unexplained unhappiness with someone as a form of self-preservation makes sense. My Scorpio influence is a Mars in the 8th and that’s it. I have done this with people before, oftentimes too late (Mars in Taurus). Her reasoning was pretty cheap and the direct influence of some serious fear of her past. She is a master at cutting people off. But I figure that maybe attempts at “getting me back” would have been better suited if she had something to say to me or think about me that was somehow new or really got at my insecurities.

    I guess after dealing with Scorpio influenced people in the past, like my mother, I tend to find their attempts to be humorous and melodramatic. The situation ended with her literally finding any way to kick and scream out the door but was always one step behind. Even though she was not perfect in the house I never thought of mentioning it, I was not bothered. I tend to be a pretty no-bothered kind of person so these kind of things always make me laugh. So much energy wasted!

    It was creepy, though. She was a nut-job and a repellent. None of my friends wanted to come to my house! And now that I have moved it’s still hard to get them to come by. Hahaha. I think the worse thing about it all was that I was so quick to check my own stuff throughout the whole thing. The situation taught me that I was not as much of a disaster as I thought I was. Funnily enough. I regret letting her unwarranted anger get the best of me at the beginning. I’d always rather mind my own business.

    Afterward I started hanging out with a Scorpio who sticks around with people through the grit, no matter if they frustrate her. She’s the kind of Scorpio who inspires me. People are more apt to cut her off than she them. She is pretty fearless and intense. But then, she has an Aries moon. 🙂

    I understand the Scorpio way of handling things and was mainly responding to the comment above from First Degree Burn. I understand that kind of anger mentioned above, my Mars is in the 8th, but I choose to try and curb it in other things such as art, sex, writing, etc. Anytime I have become vengeful I have learned how fruitless it is in the long run.

    Scorpios can sure teach you quite a bit about life, though. And that’s always a good thing. 🙂

  43. I have moon conjunct neptune in scorpio and am so sensitive to the processes of the people around me I can get really ill if they’re toxic. But I’m also very empathetic so tend to attract damaged people – you can imagine then the amount of freezing and amputation I’ve had to do in my life. Part of the reason it has to be done without explanation is that I have found these kinds of people become so dependent on your soaking up their crap for them, that if you try to explain why you won’t deal any more, they drag you into yet more scenes designed to drain your energy, they won’t be reasonable about it (because then they’d have to admit they’ve been unreasonable). This moon/neptune aspect also gives me pretty powerful clairvoyant abilities, and I’ve found that if I do explain to people what I won’t tolerate any more, their judgement and criticism and constant chewing over what I’ve said comes back to me clairvoyantly, and even though I’m physically away from them, I’m under attack psychically. So basically, sometimes I’ve just got to amputate, without explanation, to save my health and sanity. What I’m looking at now in myself is BOUNDARIES. Why do I attract these kinds of people and why do I let it get so far that amputation has to happen? Because at the end of the day it seems they don’t actually want help, they want someone to dump on so they can keep avoiding their issues. Maybe it goes both ways, maybe I want them to dump on me so I can keep myself so busy cleaning up other peoples crap I don’t have to look at my own. Hmmmm. After all, if I had any self respect I would not allow it. Anyone got any idea how to set boundaries while remaining empathetic? How to stop users taking advantage of your kind nature- without becoming unkind?

  44. yes, to all. it’s cold and sad and sometimes necessary. and sometimes nobody did anything wrong, really, just one person is a reminder of a time in someone’s life they haven’t reconciled yet and they need to heal, and won’t if the person is around, reopening the wounded memories…

  45. My sister would bring over either a friend or a boyfriend and right away I would know if they were NOT right for my sister. I would freeze out these people my sister associated with. I’d tell her they were no good for these reasons blah blah blah…then when they would come around I’d give them the dirtiest evil eye, tell them if they f*cked with my sister I’d break there knee caps slowly. Now though this may sound not so nice, I was NEVER wrong about these certain people. This bothered my sister incredibly, because deep down she knew I was right and didn’t want to deal with change. Now that I’m older I’m developing a higher vibration of Scorpio and deal with these things differently.

  46. Scorpio rising and sun conjunct mars/pluto. I amputate and have been amputated. It works for me. I see life as energy and in certain situations the energy is just no longer there. Sometime one argument and there was no going back but other times when people have done it to me I see that there was a crisis looming over time – an irritation that was just building. I think some relationships last forever and others fit a period of time in your life and when these end they create a space for new energy to come in. I find it an honest way to operate although I appreciate that for some people it is hard.

    I had a scorpio boyfriend last year and when it finished I knew there would be no contact – that I wouldn’t have to worry about that with him and I respected him for that. A year later he passed me on his bike and we had a quick text exchange – glad you looked well etc. It was honest, heart felt and again contained. Nothing since. I like that – its honourable and real.

  47. Wow, what an incredible thread! Putting the proof to the reality of the longstanding “powerful Scorpio” myth.

    I’ve had close Scorpio friends over the years, and for long long periods of years, 30 years and longer. I have a strong 8th house myself with Pluto and Mars there. Scorpio friends are only good friends. I have no casual scorpio friends.

    Funny the timeliness of this topic/thread for me, though it seems to be recurring and long-lived itself (a scorpionic thread). I have for a long time been negotiating a freeze-out/amputation with a Scorpio friend of 35 years. Yes, I am often a needy type, but he recognizes that I am not always that way. There is so much I could say on this topic! It would fill a small book. My Scorpio friends chose me, for the most part, so I don’t feel the onus of having driven them off. In fact, it still hasn’t happened in any simple way. I lost one potential Scorpio (romantic) friend once, due to his jealousy over a third, Cancer friend. He never hung around to see who I actually preferred.

    And in fact, it was a Cancer lady with a Sag rising who once very notably and stingingly froze me out of her life. For my own part, I’ve done the freezing out thing a few times or more. Most significantly with a long standing Aquarius friend, someone who I once or twice felt very needy towards. This Aquarian situation reminds me of the situation Elsa has described elsewhere with her son’s sometime Acquarius friend. The man in question is exceedingly good at making me feel frozen out. I can’t tell you how much. It’s radical though, let me assure you. Still, I’m the one who has amputated him. It feels like my only possible reaction to what they call the “detachment” of acquarius that I have too often found so unbearable.

    And let me apologize that there is someone else here called JJ. It’s too confusing. I don’t know who was here first or more consistently, but anyway I’ll be changing my user name when I can think what to change it too.

  48. I’m not a Scorp by Sun, Moon, or Asc, but I do have a strong Mars in 7th in Scorpio (an already strong placement with many, many aspects in my chart that make it much stronger). Scorpio friends are convinced that I’m just another Scorpio. I cut people out mostly out of self-preservation, but after much thought. I have probably already gone through grief/anger/etc of ‘death’ of the friendship/relationship before I even cut the person off. The cutting off actually occurs after I’ve mostly healed. I no longer need them around because I’ve healed – the damage has been done, I don’t need it done again, so goodbye. And cutting off feels bad on my end, but it feels justified and necessary, even though I’m deeply aware of the pain on BOTH ends. I will especially cut if I feel like the pain on my end was much larger. As soon as I realize the other person as toxic, manipulative, etc, they are OUT.

    But I do also cut off as a sort of punch in the face, since punching for real would tend to have oneself tossed into jail. I will also cut off in a way that SEEMS like revenge, but I actually do it because I feel the other person is being REALLY stupid and is totally wasting my time, like someone having a bitchfit and is no longer being remotely rational. I have no energy or time for childish tantrums from adults. It’s actually me stopping myself from seriously injuring the other person. If I just pretend they don’t even exist, maybe the desire to kill them because they’re acting like a subhuman will become subdued.

    • I know right…for ME….the cutting off is best for the person on the other end….why do jail time for the irrelevant?…when I simply prefer to do other things in my life that makes ME Happy and not be bothered with a bunch of crappy people that I know I was great friends and family with…that “switched on me”….that would be a waste of my time and life..

  49. This an addendum to my comment from April of last year which was not intended to spark humour but rather fear and torment. As I read my own words a year later, I am cut to the quick. Amused, amazed and keenly aware that such inexcusable behaviour is bereft of conventional expectations, I continue to “lurk in the shadows of subtility and seductive selective madness” . . . but have fine-tuned my attitude to fit the frame of political correctness.

    Little do my coworkers, colleagues and comrades know. After all, they judge the man by his cover.

    And we all know Scorpio is the master of veiled intention, a tender, sensitive and passionate soul who hides big teeth behind a blank stare.

    • What does it mean if a scorpio says they love you. and then you say f*ck you! because you think they are lying and then they say no, they are done denying it and says that the reason they haven’t “lock you off” for good (slang in my country for a freeze out or when you never speak or deal with someone again.) is because they love you. me and this scorpio (romantic, well sexual) relationship. We’ve both betrayed an it is a seemingly toxic relationship

  50. I’ll do/take amputation over gangrene anytime and no other acceptable treatment is available. Just use clean sharp tools and do it fast and do it well.

    And a modicum of explanation is called for everyone’s sanity -unless the person is absolutly off their rockers.

    I am not a scorpio but my 8th is busy with my mostly placid Taurus Sun. Merc and Venus.

    Oh and fuzzy or nebulous approaches are probly the least efficient, painfree ones.

  51. I just had a Scorpio guy who I was dating for five months do to this to me and its just plain cowardly. The good part of him he was supportive and focused on us but then again he was secretive and cunning and never took responsiblity for his bs. I tried to break it off with him recently(I am a Sag with a Pieces moon and Cap rising and have a venus in scorpio) bc of his non committment issues. He sucked me back in, made me think he wanted to work out said he wanted to reveal how he really about how he feels..only to freeze me out! Ugh… What a waste of time! Not a good friend, boyfriend or anything who does that to a person. We could have remained civil. Scorpios will suck the life out of you and try to mind**** you at the same time. His “feelings” and “issues” were way more important than mine. Completely self absorbed..Never again! Thanks for letting me vent!

    • Sounds very very similar to my situation with dealing with a scorpio.
      Besides this one had a girlfriend who he said was over and wanted to move on from her and start new.
      I knew he had feelings for her still, but he made it clear to me they were not going to get back together and I was willing to help him through it and the many other issues he had. For more than 3 months he led me on saying he found the right one and a whole lot of other bs. So I started sensing he was waiting on his “ex” &would ask him about it more often. Told him to tell me whats real so we won’t waste each others time and energy and each of us can go do something else but he continued it reassuring me to be patient with him ect. So I was like ok.
      Not 2 1/2 weeks later after speaking to him a night before, he broke communication with me, and not only that but did it through the girlfriend.

      Waste of time on unevolved scorpio trash. Spineless and most of all cowardly. He wanted the upper hand instead of being a man about it when I confronted him about us splitting up.
      This isn’t speaking of the mature scorpio who knows how to be a man. They are priceless.

  52. Would it be OK to make a distinction between ‘evolved’ and ‘unevolved’ Scorpios? Define evolved as spiritually attuned. Unevolved somewhere below earthworm. An unevolved Scorpio is possibly the worst type of human to encounter.

    I’d suggest the issue isn’t how cruel Scorpios are, but rather how to detect the difference. A spiritual Scorpio can be of great benefit to one.

    I offer this only because I come from a bit of Scorpio and although I could ignore others’ suffering at their hands because I know how to deal with the bast#@d Scorpios, I feel compelled to provide some navigation.

    I instantly detect a Scorpio’s spiritual orientation and ignore the earthworm variety while draw near the phoenix variety. Even another Scorpio luxuriates in the presence of a transcendent Scorp.

    P.S. My post isn’t intended to cause more controversy around those dang Scorpios but rather provide some road-side assistance.

  53. This all reminds me of the Tom Cruise – Nicole Kidman split. He’a a Scorp rising, and she was quite vocal about how he just ended it, no warning, no nothing, and she said he never told her why. Closed the book.

    I’ve been amputated by a double Scorpio friend. No warning at all. She just stopped all communication one day. She used to try to solve all my problems for me. It was weird, she used to take responsibility for things that weren’t hers to take. I certainly did not want her to, but she always seemed so worried about taking care of things. I don’t know if that’s a Scorpio trait, but control certainly is.

    I actually had that happen one other time too. No Scorpio in her chart, but she had Mars rising in Taurus square Pluto exact. All her friends were Scorps though. Out of the blue one day she told me she didn’t want to be my friend anymore. Via email. It was good timing, as I was having a hard time with her negativity, so it was all for the best, but I still was not expecting her to ‘break up’ with me.

    I have a male friend with no Scorpio except Saturn in Scorp on the Dsc and he has amputated many people in his life. Every single one of his siblings to be exact. All for different reasons. He says he has no problem closing the book on people.

    I agree, an integrated Scorpio is a glorious thing to behold. It’s a rather rare thing to find however, but they are out there.

  54. actually makes me think of two relatives of mine. an aunt and uncle. both scorpios. The aunt spent two years in seclusion a good 10 years ago and came out of it this beautiful person with some amazing kindness and very giving. My uncle on the other hand has been dealing with drug and alcohol abuse since his teenage years. Has yet to clean up his act.

    She is amazing to just be in the same room with and he will bring down a whole family gathering.

  55. I met my Scorpio Sun, Moon, Venus when I was 15 years old. We started off as just playing around like teenagers. By the time we were 18 we had begun a more mature and intimate relationship. My Scorpio was (and still is) very ambitious so school was the be-all and end-all of his early twenties. However, while he clearly told me not to wait for him and that I should find someone to love me, I only used other men as emotional bookmarks until my Scorpio found his way back to me. Now, he tells me that he has met someone (we are about 22-23 years) and he is completing his BA in Biology. He begins to talk about the future. Suddenly the woman is pregnant. When the baby is born he comes to me. I do not get pregnant although had I, I am not sure he would have married me anyway. The next year she gets pregnant with baby number two and he comes to me to tell me. I have not gotten pregnant yet. Time passes and I realize that my youth is going fast but I do not make the move for another six years. However, when I do my move is to another state altogether. I realized that being accessible to him was my downfall. He finally marries her and well he has started in on his masters degree…..I do the unthinkable one day by calling the office — leaving a message with the receptionist “to tell him that his wife called.” This was a Thursday late afternoon. By Friday evening he had called and asked had I left the message. Yes. Well off went the kid gloves and he flat out told me never to do that again and further never to refer to myself as his wife. I told him to f***k off and hung up the phone. He called about 15 times that evening and each time all I did was answer the phone saying the same two words and hanging up. By midnight I needed a drink. I unplugged the phone. That was the last time I spoke to him. He never came over to talk me into staying or to try to comfort me. I lived in that apartment for another four years and he never came there once in that time. I met my present husband, and we have been married for 18 years. Fast forward to October 25, 2009. I had a feeling about my ex and something about all of the deaths this year got to me. I knew his mother’s address and mailed a birthday card to her care hoping she would give it to him. I did not write my postal address — only the city and state. On November 2 he emailed me using the one I wrote inside the card. The first thing he said to me was “I have been looking for you for years.” He claims he hired a private investigator which cost him lots of cash but he never found out anything about me. Here’s the thing…he thought (1) that I was dead or (2) that I was in jail. I can’t figure out why he would think that at all ! Go figure. Well, we talk more and email some. Finally, the calls and emails stop in week two (beginning November 9). In week three I learn that he is in Medical School and getting his PhD. All of my emails go unreplied and none of my voice mailed are returned. Week three (Thanksgiving), I ask how we are supposed to learn about each other after all of this time if we don’t communicate. He states that “people don’t change.” In the next breath, though, he says “I don’t really know you, though do I?” So, I say, if people don’t change then I am the same person you claim I am your claim that you don’t really know me is a gross contradiction. He says, well…”I don’t know…but I have to get ready for school.” We hang up and I deleted my Yahoo account with that email address.

  56. “I realized that being accessible to him was my downfall.”

    Honey you said it yourself. And Benjamin Franklin said an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

    Go figure 😉

  57. OK, been browsing through this extended trailer of Scorpio love/hate relationship comments, opinions and points-of-view, but this one by “First Degree Burn” on April 30/08 takes the cake, like OMG:

    “When people hurt you, betray your sacred trust or abuse your love and friendship, the thing to do is hang around the sidelines in the shadows for awhile. Let them think that you froze them out by making yourself somewhat scarce, yes, but remain everpresent and in control behind the scenes. Your spirit lingers. Your invisible presence and ominous energy remains unscathed. Your ghost succumbs to wreaking continual havoc veiled in at times subtle, at times outrageous, activity executed at inopportune occasions.

    For it follows that when these offending parties expect you to freeze them out, you are doing them a favor by doing so. This is not revenge, this is foolishly fulfilling their expectation!

    The evolved Scorpion never plays to another trumpeter’s tune. A true lone wolf, the Scorpion marches to the beast (beat) of his own drummer. They devise their own strategy and avoid the obvious. They lurk in the shadows of subtility and seductive selective madness.

    The whole idea is that your traitors and abusers feel false security in thinking you will not bother with revenge and that you will forget the matter by simply “freezing them out.”

    No, as a bonafide certified triple Scorpion (quadruple if you include my ascendant) I believe the best way to deal with such horrible people is to torment them. Aim below the belt. Knife behind the back. Get them where they deserve it, when they least expect it.

    Get these mortal offenders so paranoid, they are constantly expecting you to pop out of the shadows and out of the murky water like a gator lurking in the slime of their subconscious ready to devour.

    This is the time to disappear and do more important things and carry on with your life with more worthy individuals. You can always return to check up on the abhorrent offenders at a later date and more convenient time. At which point you can monitor their stress and anxiety-o-meter and devise an even more poisonous and deadly arrow to hit the mark, again, waiting for the moment they least expect it.

    This cycle can continue for however long you wish. Remember, the true Scorpio is a master of manipulation and control. I will never date or ask a Scorpio woman out for this reason. No matter how attractive or sensual or sexual she may be it is simply not worth the headache.

    And because she is a woman, she will beat the Scorpio man at his own game as she is master of it. Women do not play fair. To the male mind, the female response is entirely emotional and frequently irrational. Simply put, she will catch you off guard and manipulate you to fulfill her own pleasure in beating you at your own game.”

  58. Poor lowly Scorpions, nothing better to do with their lives than exact revenge for slights real or imagined. Have fun, y’all, I’ll be out here being happy and doing cool stuff.

    • Del-

      I am a true scorpio woman. Scorpio sun & moon. You have completely misunderstood. If someone slights me, and I had respected them previously-it’s only FAIR they get a taste of their own medicine. One of the best feelings in life is respecting yourself and not being anybody’s door mat-at least for me. I have frozen MANY people out-including my own mother. If someone brings me pain and tears-they aren’t worth a lick of my time. I’ve also done the fake freeze out as I bide my time to let my stinger go haywire. I have certainly taken revenge on lovers who have done me wrong and I will get down and dirty to see to it that someone gets to taste the same pain they fed me. Not only that-I have the decency to WARN men I am vindictive before they ever feel my ire. If they choose to get me so angry I want to “sting” them then that is a choice they made on their own.

      There is no healing-there is no peace until I have avenged wrongs done to me. This isn’t only my sign-it’s my past. I was taken advantage of HORRIBLY as a child and I never want anyone to have that power over me again. The moment it feels like someone has that power-I can’t heal until I’ve taken charge of the situation and delivered the appropriate sting to their transgression. The smartest thing someone can do once they realize they’ve hurt a Scorpio is to apologize and mean it as quickly and as fervently as possible. You may avoid my sting if you do that. The freeze out is usually phase one before I really deliver my final blow. I like it when people don’t see it coming. I dislike hurting anybody who has hurt me.

      You get what you give. If you hurt me I will hurt you back. If you love me and are there for me, I will love you and be there for you back in anyway I can. When that code of honor is broken, all bets are off. Once I’ve delivered revenge THEN I go out and be happy doing cool stuff. Bad feelings last MUCH longer for me when I don’t take action to return the pain someone has caused me. If I think a freeze out will hurt the other person the most-I leave it at that. If I know you have a weakness that would hurt you more than that-depending on your transgression I will go after that. If I feel like you’ve hit some sort of middle ground with hurt-I will take the middle ground revenge.

      Only after I’ve vindicated a hurt can I completely heal and then remove that person from my life permanently. I’ve had people who couldn’t deal with my intensity but after they lost me in their life-they missed the love and loyalty they had from me-and they wanted me back in their life. If you couldn’t realize the great friend/lover you had in me before-I won’t trust you to actually realize it later.

      Very few people are beyond being stung in my life. Only those who have gone through hell for me can get away with committing a transgression against me.

      You may think all that is lowly but I live my life by these rules. You get what you give. Don’t expect to mess with me and get away with it without me doing something in return to hurt you back.

      Some people say an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind BUT if you take my eye-you had BEST be prepared to give one in return. That’s how I roll.

      • whoops-made an error. Meant to say above I dislike hurting anybody who has NEVER hurt me-and I enjoy returning pain to those who’ve given it. My bad.

      • I have a daughter who is a scorpio who has amputated me. We had always been very close, loving, traveled together. But then she moved to California and changed little by little, became distant, saw the bad in people and became very judgemental, manipulative, passive aggressive. She was hurtful, yet she couldn’t see it. Her freezing me out of her life had to have been the most hurtful mean thing I’ve ever experienced. I was devastated. I love her so much and miss her. But she chose to create a problem rather than fix a problem, she chose to turn her back on her loving family, too good for any of us. She was loved and respected and she did this to even her grandparents who never did a damn thing to her but love her. She loves a great life, has a happy marriage, and has no need for anyone. In fact, she is slowly but surely mashing sure her husband is more separated from his family, who are great people. My question is, what’s the deal? Can scorpiis see their own contribution to a problem, can they see their own lack of grace in the lives of people who love them. And will she return to us, so scorpios ever feel guilt or shame? They may feel justified in their actions, but do they ever reconsider and then return? I miss my daughter.

        • Dear Sms2020 you have my deepest sympathy and respect.
          I am so sorry this happened and that you’re hurting. People do things sometimes without being able to see themselves. Whether this is by design from the universe, (astrology seems to suggest it is for some) or a serious problem to be fixed, we don’t always know I think.

          Take care of your heart and the hearts of those dear who are still in your life. Let your daughter go for now. She is grown, married, and in a different space in life. She may come back, she may not, but her soul has a path and it doesn’t sound like this is about you. This is entirely her and I am sorry you’ve been hurt this way. Be good to yourself.

  59. Yes, I was frozen out by a Scorp or rather, he initiated the freezing process and I completed it; I guess it was a fixed sign vs. fixed sign deal, where, IMO, finality was the only logical solution. It was stinging and actually made me physically ill BUT I still feel it was preferable to other Scorp experiences I have with family members, who are not so easily “cut offable.” My mother, with Venus in Scorpio, is one of these! She shows love “the Scorpion way” which to me, as a Leo rising with Aquarian Sun/Venus/Mars, just ends up feeling like being tortured with red-hot pokers. Or pincers. Both!

  60. I’m a Scorpio rising and have had to amputates a few close friendships so far. It’s very true to Elsa’s situation where I felt I was just so unappreciated and misunderstood that I had to cut ties out of self-preservation.

    I think w/ Scorpios being misunderstood is just the most painful part of an unequal relationship. That’s all we ever really want. True, Scorpios are very judgemental, but they suffer from their own judgement of themselves most of all, so they want someone who knows them in and out and can still love and accept them, flaws and all. Scorpios can give deep, true, honest-to-god validation but it is hard for them to receive this from others.

    Interestingly, I went through a 6-month period when both my Scorpio best friend and my Scorpio boyfriend (the two ppl in my whole life that I felt the deepest, most wonderful connection to) were both amputated from my life. I cut off my best friend because our passive-aggressive ways made us grow apart and that hurt me a lot, and my boyfriend cut me off because he was much older and more mature and realized I couldn’t give him the love he wanted.

  61. I don’t have any planets except Uranus (in the 12th) in Scorpio, but I do have A tight conjunction with Sun/Pluto in Libra and Mars in Cancer in the 8th.I have to say, the aputation theme sounds pretty familiar to me.For along time I didn’t have aword for it.I just knew that when someone had maxed me out through abhorrent behavior/abuse etc… that I was very good at putting lots of effective “distance” between us.I also am good at leaving some associations with lesser offenders to simmer on the back burner for a minute.

    It takes a while, and a lot, but I am capable of getting to the point of being totally cold to these people’s feelings.That’s when I’m most polite.And the trust? GONE.I amputated a scorpio friend of mine after years of verbal jabs and insults stemming from her insecurities and imagined slights on my part.Just did the same to a fellow Libra when I realized she was too competitive/envious of me to really want the best for me.That hurt like hell..but she’s been calling mutual friends with the story…”haven’t seen her for months…I’m worried”.

    The fact is that I am now starting to realize the emotional depth of connection I am capable of building/pulling away.I don’t know if it’s more of the Cancer self-protection/indirect thing going but it has been my modus operandi for my whole life.I own it now as an adult though.

  62. I am not a Scorpio, but I am somewhat Plutonian with Pluto conjunct the ascendant and a few planets in Scorpio. I also have lots of experience with Scorpios, because every close relationship I have ever had has been with a Scorpio – friendship and romantic. The funny thing is, I have been more the amputator than they have – I have had to cut myself loose from them, because they were so taxing to me, and harmful to me. They seemed to be living off of my energy – sucking it right up.

    I am not proud of this, but I am a notorious amputator in relationships – and maybe this is Pluto in my chart. If you’ve ever hit rock bottom, been to hell and back Pluto-style, because of a relationship, you don’t want to go there again. You would rather send someone else to hell than go back there yourself.

    The amputation? It’s painful, of course it hurts. It hurts because Plutonians tend not to love freely and selectively, but really LOVE our loved ones intensely. It’s like losing a part of ourselves. But you get over it, you have to – because you realize it’s for your own survival. Freezing someone out is easier than slowly breaking away, too. It’s less complicated – like going cold turkey off an addiction – and it works.
    Plus, I hate to admit it, but it is kind of a satisfying way to punish this loved one who hurt you. Secretly, ha ha. The love is there, but who doesn’t want a tiny bit of satisfaction?

    Well, this is my experience. I hope you found it helpful.

  63. Scorp. moon, venus in 8th opp pluto. However, scorp moon is softened by a trine to venus in pisces…so I never really cut anyone off, until a few years ago, when I was betrayed by friends. I cut them off pretty much completely…it hurt like hell, but I couldn’t take it anymore, I was pushed to the limit.

    I have also been frozen out by a Scorp. Not really sure why? He always wants the upper hand, very controlling. I think majorly insecure and over protective of himself and of getting hurt..he was hurt very much as a child and thru life. Its a defense and im learning to see that…but as a scorp with my own abandonement issues, its really hard not to take it personally and feel hurt.

    I read somewhere once that many times scorps marry each other. I think this may happen because a scorp is the only one who can really know the pain and insecurities of another scorp. and tolerate all the intensity and baggage that sign comes with.

  64. There is truth and there is truth.

    This whole collection has been more helpful and insightful into the scopian mind than anything else i’ve recieved in the last seven years of varying agony over a singular scorpio relationship.

    First degree??? Try third degree burn… at least.. when salt of the earth meets the fixed water ice of a scorpio. A chemical burn that leaves scars and fractures the psyche of both parties involved. Holy moly. I am still trying to reconcile with this particular lad. As I, sun sign capricorn, am the soulmate to his best friend, sun sign taurus -I cannot help but think it would better if we could bury at least one of the hatchets involved in our association. As well as honestly, get some long overdue honest insight and closure out of the whole deal.

    What can crack the ice anyway? Obviously a spiritual angle is helpful… come on with the compassion! as well. I don’t even hold the godawful aforementioned revenge and psychological shadow puppets against scorpio. I admire it partially. It’s hard to find words to facilitate peace… what can one who wants reconciliation really say to a scorpio?

  65. miss p, i like your blog very much. if there were no comments here, i think i’d read it ten times a day. but every couple of weeks you touch on scorpio, and it feels like everyone and their mother comes around to slander the scorpio. i hate to admit how much it bothers me, which is why i was so touched by this entry.

    it was very touching, and truthfully i can entirely sympathize with you – i was amputated by someone when i was very young, and the pain of that was something i still can’t talk about. it wasn’t the amputation that hurt me, it was the shame i felt over my own carelessness toward this person who was only trying to help me heal myself. she wasn’t a scorpio, just a fiery pisces who reached out to me when i was still coming away from a horrible childhood. she was never unkind to me, but the weight i put on her was sinking her ship. and the healing she gave me took effect anyway; that hurt the worst! i swallowed up everything and gave nothing and i still walked away the winner. it took ten years to forgive myself for what i did, and when i came to her with my apology she told me how much she’d missed me and how proud she was of me. that’s the type of kindness a great pisces can show, and my gratitude for this experience can’t be articulated.

    i have the sun, merc, venus, and pluto in scorpio. aquarius moon, capricorn rising. perhaps if i didn’t get her lesson at the age i did, i might have become like the scorpios your readers say they fear and loath. but really, i’m nothing like they say and neither are my many scorpio friends. i’m very opposed to all this “but if you meet a bad scorpio” business because i’ve met bad cancers (ouch!) and bad capricorns (run!) and bad aquarians (terrifying!) and bad geminis (suicide!) and even bad pisceans (hide!!!).

    thank you, seriously. not just for saying something nice about scorpios and endeavoring(with astonishing tact) to articulate what scorpios can’t say – very few things in life happen suddenly so if someone got “amputated” they were probably a serious danger to the body – but thank you for writing about something which caused you discomfort. your bravery and your willingness are invaluable lessons to me.

  66. I was thinking all of this talk of amputation as an act of self-preservation reminded me of a bible verse :

    Matthew 5:30 “And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”

    Spooky, huh? 😛

  67. You are sooo right im a scorp. rising w/ sun in virgo and i helped my friends out alot and went out of my way for them…once lol when i was in the 7th grade i gave my friend my treasured bratzs books XD i loved those..and a doll that was just for christmas then on her b-day she wanted me to buy her a DS nintedo ds those things costed alot .. and then she used to play hit me which i hated >.> but idk i still hung around her and i do that too that free session therapy XD lol idk i love helping people, listening to tjheir problems and just helping but … uhh people always seem to shoot me down >.>

  68. “what can one who wants reconciliation really say to a scorpio?”

    I’m sorry that I hurt you so badly, I didn’t know what I was doing. Please kill me quickly and get it over with.

  69. Scorpio sun here. Your piece has really helped me, actually – indeedy, the image of the ‘cold, callous’ scorpio is a shallow depiction, and there’s usually more going on when you really plum the depths of a situation. I’ve recently dissociated myself from two friends (who are also friends with each other – it was a circle of sorts). This has caused me a massive amount of anguish and pain, but I really felt compelled to do something, only after thinking long and hard about it. Freezing people out is not something I do lightly, and I’m also extremely averse to confrontation, so perhaps the ‘freezing out’ action is a consequence of that. The few times I’ve done this has usually been because others have been superficial, emotionally draining, and opposed to my personal values. I’m certainly not perfect myself (painfully aware of my own shortcomings). I know distancing hurts those on the receiving end, but it hurts the scorp just as much.

    Thanks for your honesty and insight 🙂 x

  70. wow…just came across this thread now (: haha it’s a little late i guess but who knows, maybe a scorpio who has decided to cut off this thread will come back? 😉


    i just recently discovered that i am a pisces sun with aquarius moon & scorpio rising. what does it mean to have all 3 water signs?

    also, i’ve realized that i have a very extreme personality. i can be extremely giving, generous, kind, will be with you through the ups & downs…but as soon as you betray me, the guillotine drops with no remorse. i never really realized i could be this harsh until recently. i’ve cut out a couple best friends over the years after they had wronged me to a point that felt like they didn’t appreciate the things i did for them.

    i think scorpios or scorpio rising tend to be extremely loyal. and if you double cross them…that’s it. we knew we did everything possible to cater to that person and hold them down. that’s why they have no guilt or bad feelings about cutting off people cold. when you give of yourself completely & it’s not reciprocated… byebye.

    anyways, i feel like i’m kind of screwed with this match up. pisces & scorpio rising? man it explains a lot..lmfao. i will be the best friend you’ve ever had. i will sacrifice myself for you. i’ve even given really nice, expensive gifts to some of my best friends. but once you show me you’re brushing me off, you’re getting the sting & i’m gone.

    i think scorpios also have an uncanny ability to hold off & give the silent treatment. i mastered that as a teenager…if someone screwed me over, i could go years without speaking a word to them. of course it’s not comfortable, but it sends thema very clear message about f***ing over kind people & taking people for granted. i don’t think people ever get over the sting of the scorpio…do you?

    i want to know if anyone else is pisces sun + scorpio rising??? halp…lmao

    • Scorpios are good people,but bragging about intentional hurt against someone is wrong on every level.We all were created by God and have good in us..As ppl we should grow and stop taking matters into our own hands after being hurt by someone.Be true to yourselves .Most scorps drive a hard bargain and done mind hurting themselves ,to hurt someone else..It’s really sad,a lot of them end up alone in life because nothing can meet what they want in life .Im an Aquarius and I love a Scorpio?but I’m being forced to stay away because I’m not the way she wants me to be .So our love just passes.Ive gotten ok with it and accepted it after trying to show her I am human and problems and hurts are meant for growth and to be worked out,if you really love ,like a scorp is said too..I find my love more lasting than hers,she only sees where I hurt her,she hurt me as well,and I still always gave what she needed when she called.Thats true love.Some say they string you along.Coudl be.But my truth is ,love has one definition,and If I do love you ,I will forgive you and be there for you.Scorps feel as though this a needy person Or smothering person.So sad,because you miss out on good love with judgement that is not the case!!,..Everyone do not intentionally hurt you Scorps…pray for forgiveness to enter your heart!

  71. hey people who came back to this post XD i have a question…why do we freeze people out?! i do it a lot..at the first sign of betrayal or lies, i’m gone in a flash. sometimes i feel a little bad later, but i guess it’s a protective mechanism.

    anyone know why we do this???

  72. I have no Scorpio or 8th house in my chart, but I did amputate a friend that I felt like a 5th wheel with. He was talking to his 4 other friends while ignoring me. It came to the point where after about 3 months of observation that I realized our friendship was going nowhere and that we just weren’t meant to be friends.

    To be honest we didn’t have that much in common and he probably was just pretending to be friends out of pity because when he met me for the first time I was sitting alone at my university eating. Lol.

  73. It’s pretty much a: storming, forming, norming, performing and finally separating stage

    People enter your life for a reason, and when that purpose has been filled, they take off to fulfill their other duties

  74. Wow. What a well written article.

    I think Scorpio’s are way sensitive (the evolved ones), and have high levels of emotion, and don’t know how to simply detach (like Aquarius) while still being around. For some reason that energy can be all or nothing. I think they have strong survival skills, and are in contact with their animal nature – and I gues the amputation is about survival on some level. My mother had a lot of scorpio energy. They thing about her with her family – it was almost Sicilian – once you were in – you were in. I am grateful for it and I hung in there with her, but I also had to learn how to see through things. She froze me out emotionally for several years (ages 19-21) when Saturn was transiting scorpio for all things. I was still a member of the family – but there was no emotional connection. I did the same thing to her for about three year about 10 years later. We fought it out – but she wanted me to say my truth and fight back – .

    It is a karmic relationship I guess – but that is not necessarily a bad thing – as I decided to be water/rock. My pisces part – water – dripped, dripped, dripped, and Taurus patience hung in there. I think there is mutual respect now, and a relationship – but that passage to adulthood was difficult.

    I don’t know why that energy feels it has to be all or nothing – but I think it hits them in their core – like they won’t live on some deep level.

    I am sorry about the loss of your friend. I had an intimate relationship with a male that I was frozen out of – took about 10 years to get over.

  75. Scorp Sun here. A few comments here are disturbing.

    This issue of amputation is so complex. Many thoughts on it and some have been raised already. Self-preservation is true. However, lurking and hovering and lying in wait type of actions….I don’t know what that is other than stalking, mindgames, interfering with another’s life to a scary degree. That’s not Scorp. I don’t know what that is but it’s likely to be explained more by the psych DSM-IV manual than an astrological sign.
    I’m a scorp and never ever would do that or have that intention. If someone betrays, hurts or is toxic, bad enough that I need to amputate, that’s just taking a healthy action to get crap out of my life.

    It’s upsetting to read that friendships of decades – 18 years, 35 years, etc. – are amputated. Apart from abuse being involved, what the hell?? Do you just get tired of understanding? If you’ve managed a friendship that long, obviously it had a great deal of good and health in it. Amputating after that long sounds …. upsetting. Odd.

  76. I was friends with a male Scorpio for a few months, after about two years of knowing him. We got along fairly well, had a few spats here and there (I’m a Sagittarius, I don’t know if our different signs had anything to do with that), but we had this huge blowup – all a misunderstanding – and that’s what I think made him rethink our friendship.

    I always let him set the boundaries, and I like to think I did most of the work – he never texted/IM’d/called me first, and that frustrated me (it’s one of the reasons we argued). But he was a very good listener and we had really nice conversations…and I was in love with him, but that’s another story.

    In short, we had a massive fight (I inadvertently caused it) but we apologized like before and he said he really ‘valued’ me as a friend, and he was glad we’d worked things out.

    One day (a few weeks later), we were texting for almost all the day – everything was fine. I went onto my Facebook at approximately midnight, and – he had unfriended me. His (now ex-) girlfriend had also removed me from her friends (we weren’t quite friends, but I’d placated her and saved his skin during an argument they were having, so I suppose she deemed me worthy of being a Facebook friend). I texted him right after I found out and asked why he’d done it, and he said immediately that he hadn’t been on Facebook since he left, he didn’t know what I was talking about. I said, “So we’re still cool?” and he said, “Of course.”

    But he never refriended me, and I texted him a few times and he didn’t respond to those. About two months went by with not much contact – he just gave me noncommittal answers, the barest of details, and finally I said, “Screw it, I miss him, I’ll see what he’s up to.”

    Lo and behold, he did respond, but the moment I asked how his senior year was going, he didn’t reply back. Again, about two weeks later, I tried to contact him again, and finally sucked up my pride to refriend him. He didn’t accept it, but based on his Wall, friends list, etc., he went on every day.

    We had several mutual friends, all but two of whom he removed, and I’m wondering if we’ll ever get back to where we were before all this stuff started.

    Any suggestions, or is this a lost cause? I know we’ll see each other someday, somewhere, and I’m wondering what’s going to happen…

  77. Lest we forget that Scorpio and the 8th house is all about manipulating behind the scenes, and ultimately, control of the situation.

    8th house is also about sex, death, and other people’s money.

    So, if a Scorpio decides to cut you or themselves off, consider the motive. There is always a motive.

  78. Dumped and amputated by Scorpio. No warning. No discussion. No mutual agreement. Uncompromising. Lethal. Cut their nose off despite their face. In the end it was necessary and appropriate…but why so cruel?

  79. And KathyF….you made a very interesting point. I can say, though, that I’ve not found another best friend, nor did I ever consider him my ‘best’ friend. I loved talking to him – still do. I am a bit surprised at your ‘They start off more vested in the friendship then I am, and are constantly calling, texting, etc. so I never feel the need to’ statement. It’s eye-opening…I just wanted to make him like me, I suppose.

  80. Australia
    Know the feeling, lots of passive aggressiveness as well – didn’t want to be cruel I think but easier way for him was be “nice” but avoid/cut communication. Devastated, it is very cruel. I would never treat someone like that who had been so close and hadn’t mistreated me.

  81. I am so pleased that I came across this website. It has help me so much to understand and move on.

    I have been losing my mind, driven there by a Scorpio freezing me out, then who dumped and amputated.
    I am a typical Virgo practical and analytical I understand that relationships end however what I could not understand how a close loving relationship could just end so abruptly without any warning or explanation.
    I still don’t know if it was the result of self preservation or whether he had just lost interest, I do know however that I no longer need an explanation from him. Instead I just accept that it’s over and would not even entertain a friendship should he come back my way. I will never date another Scorpio

  82. Hello, everyone! Due in part to this site, I’ve been accepting that it was my own fault that my Scorpio cut me out.

    The other reason is that my best friend, who’s a Cancer, is dating an Aries. She gave me a lot of insight into her mutual water-sign (Scorpio), and I in turn tried to help her understand Aries, because he and I are a lot alike (like, scarily so).

    They had their first major fight – he unintentionally lied to her, or she thought he lied to her, and now he’s scrambling to fix it. She cut him out and told me precisely why: she can’t stand liars.

    Anyway, it brought a lot of the old pain back, and I now realize that in my quest to impress and placate Scorpio, he found out that I lied to him, and that was that. I was out.

    I wish I hadn’t lost him. I spent three years loving him, wanting him, and I screwed everything up. Seeing my best friend completely amputate her boyfriend, seeing how coldly and completely she got rid of him because he inadvertently (and accidentally, he says) hurt her…that’s precisely what happened with my Scorpio.

    Now if I see him again, and I know I will someday, I don’t know how to react. Should I ignore him, or say hello, or…just walk away?

  83. Lynn…

    You let him go his own way, he may just come back when he’s ready if not don’t sweat it just carry on with your life. He’s in pain but he’s more or less living his life.

    Anyway to this topic… I agree with the whole topic to be honest. Natal Sun, Venus, Mercury and Pluto in Scorpio. Plus a progressed Scorpio rising means I understand the need to amputate. Which comes after a long and hard time of deliberation, should I or shouldn’t I?!

    I give too many chances I realise, I allow people to do whatever then when I say something in response to their nonsense or behaviour its always ‘don’t speak to me like that’ or ‘you’re jealous’ or ‘you’re behaving like that cause of the things that have happened in you’re life’. Those are some of the few things I’ve heard that for myself when it gets to that point is really my need to amputate and say goodbye without warning. As others have put it ‘ripping the bandage off’ which pains but will always rise to a higher understanding about myself. It allows me create new boundaries. I’ve thought about those statements for a while and realised that those are their judgements and not about my actual character. I can be blunt and its without the bullshit, ‘if you want a shoulder to cry on don’t come to a Scorpio they’ll tell you the truth, look for another sign’. I couldn’t agree more with that statement.

    It seems that no matter how many times I or many Scorpios say to a person what is irritating them or hurting them many don’t listen then end up with the silent treatment come back and do it all again. I wonder if they learnt the lesson at all?! Or if they just enjoy provoking?! Let’s be real that energy, those listening ears, the encouraging words and that loyalty to a fault shall soon disappear as the waters run dry or the constant dropping in the ocean has reached that point where the waters are still, frozen, no longer flowing or just crashing violently against all the drops of debris.

    I’ve lost a lot of friends including a boyfriend because I got to the point of ‘really? Are you really telling me this superficiality? Isn’t there better things to speak about?!’. As well as no longer having the time to comment on the dramas of others, I can’t keep enabling people to not learn their lessons, take care of themselves or grow as people as they suck me dry and thrive because they can’t be bothered to look at and process themselves but expect me to do it and tell them. I have things to do!

  84. I’m a Taurus being frozen out by a Scorpio I love dearly. It’s like being hit with a 2×4 out of the blue – she said she loved me recently, I wasn’t aware of any problems and we were having good times. Then she emails me that she needs to stop having our Netflix movie nights for a couple of weeks while she works long hours. Okay, that’s sad, but I can do it. I called or e-mailed only a couple of times a week before I discovered that she wasn’t answering, then spaced it out further, but in nearly a month she’s only answered once.

    The trouble with freezing me out is, I have no idea how to conduct myself – how can I find out if she’s not speaking to me? She’s kind of softer than many Scorpios. She told me right at the start she had a horrific childhood and is afraid of closeness, and our 6 ½ years have been studded with big and little backoffs. Always a 2×4 out of the blue. I came to believe they were readjustments when she was feeling too close. She said she didn’t understand why she did that, but I might be right. I backed off and called her less often, but every now and then put out a feeler to see when she was ready to come back, and she always did. 2 weeks at the most.

    But this time, it’s gone twice as long as ever before. Even when it’s a business question, I can’t get an answer. I’ve done the office work for her business for years, but I’ve put it on hold while she wasn’t speaking to me, except for upcoming tax deadlines. In the end I need to know whether to hang on and see what happens or to put together all the tax stuff and passwords and leave it in her house, take my things and leave my key behind. I need to know what to do about this old car I lent her.

    Besides that I need to know whether to process this as an ending, or not. I need to get out of the limbo. Even if I never can find out what I did – and it would be nice to be able to make some sense out of it in my mind, as I move on.

    Our lives were intertwined in so many ways. I can untwine them if I have to – yes I’m feeling destroyed but I do not have to be needy at her. I do not cry at her and have always made a point of not doing so. But I’m not ready to make my own unilateral decision to untwine our lives no matter what she does. I still want her back. I feel like whatever I do is likely to be wrong – either I precipitate the amputation myself by putting out connection feelers if she wants to be rid of me, or I precipitate it by untwining everything if that’s not her intention. I’m sure it’s silly to think I should do one of those, but I have absolutely no clue which one.

    We always said we’d take each other’s cats if anything happened, and I know she’ll miss my kitties as much as I’ll miss hers, if it comes to it. I’m just having so much trouble believing she’d really do that, that it could really happen. Because after all, I don’t have anything to tell me definitely whether it is happening or not.

    And it seems so sad, such a waste, when we always felt we were so good together (or at least we both said so) to just cut it off when, if I did something, we could have talked about it and I could have apologized/explained/reformed. I thought that’s what one did in a relationship. She’s my first Scorpio and I had no idea it could end like this.

    Any advice… if anyone’s still here?

  85. I work with a scorp who is in a serious relationship, we got to be what i thought was friends, he would call me about small things he could have put in an email, or not bothered telling me at all, we always went off topic, he flirted and teased, but it was all safe, he lives in another state, then, he just stopped. Its been a few weeks, i still have no idea what changed, working with him has its awkward moments, for me at least. It messed my head up a little, wondering what i did to provoke his sudden, and i mean overnight, change. I got bitchy over the next 2 days, but im over it now, if i have to talk to him, i keep it short, i stay on topic, im not going down that road again, i just wish i knew why he pulled back, it was so innocent and just fun chatting

  86. Jennifer w, I believe that what happens is something in their own heads, not anything we did. The first time, mine told me it wasn’t anything I did, which left me utterly baffled. I think it has to do with getting closer, until some invisible line is crossed and they panic. What seems safe to us may not to them. I’ve been astonished at how much she is like descriptions of both abuse survivors and Scorpios – why they should be so similar puzzles me.

    She’s told me she confuses herself, which is oddly comforting. I’ve come to believe there IS nowhere I stand, I only have this moment and however it is now. I’ve also come to believe there is no progress in this relationship, only cycles. I can ride them out if I let go of expectations and just enjoy, in the moment. Not so easy for a Taurus, but I’m learning.

    Mine came back, and we’re kind of feeling our way from here, not as close as we were, but my panic buttons are gradually quieting down.

  87. Can anyone help me with my problem. I am a Scorpio female and have been in a relationship with a Scorpio male for 1 – 2 years. First year he was here and there, hot and cold, then he came back after 5 months and told me he loved me, missed me, we are meant to be etc. We have been fine for a year, no rows or anything. Then we went on holiday a month ago had a very slight disagreement, he left my house in a rage and I havent heard from him sice. He has not replied to anything, not one word???

  88. I have a Scorpio boyfriend, we’ve been together a year or two. Very close, loving, warm relationship BUT 5 weeks ago he stops communicating with me. He has ignored every text, call and knock on his door. My mum passed away at the weekend, he knew she was very ill and that I was caring for her. Still nothing… I text him to tell him she had passed away and I eventually got a text back saying how sorry he was, truly devestaed, told me to read some book, and then finished off by saying that he wasn’t in a good place at all right now?? WELL I KNEW THAT!!! it’s all about him. Why do these men wallow in self pity, can they really not help it? After 2 years together, practically living together, how can he just do this?

    • Going through my Scorpio guy not communicating with me. & doing a lot of research to figure out what to do next. Your story was very eye opening and I am so sorry that someone could be so callous to you at such a difficult time, that is shocking.

    • stinger51 – they just do it because they are selfish!

      my scorpio boyfriend really loved me as long as i was babying him and serving his infantile needs due to his stress and he was also not in a good place right now. as soon as i had something stressful in my life, he can’t take it. it is all about him…

      after i took great loving care of him, he just cut me off when he felt like it…selfishness – that’s the reason.

      • You hit the nail on the head. They freeze people out for being needy because only the needs of the scorpios count. All scorpio are this way to some extent. I’ve known many very selfish, self involved scorpios, but never a truly evolved one. Is there such a thing? I am an aquari, picses rising, sag moon.

  89. Hello D,

    I think you should reflect on your own statement to understand the behavior of your friend.

    “I was being way to friendly with her boyfriend, but not on purpose! (Sag moon – I smiled to much).”
    “not on purpose” is only a defensive statement..it’s human not to want to accept being guilty…

    Due to your over friendliness with her boyfriend, this has caused:
    “Her boyfriend completly monopolized the conversation and kept calling my attention…” Well, deep inside you wanted it to be like this..maybe you craved for his attention as well by observing his closeness to your best friend -no friend would like to admit this. But just think about it..be sincere to yourself….

    Being a Scorpio myself, I can sense this is not true:
    “when what I really wanted to do was – Just be with her alone and talk to her only .I never liked him but always lied and said yeh, he’s ok”
    You felt left behind when you are with them-which is normal since they’re supposed to be closer together even when you’re there..

    “I think my friend ended up with him for fear of ending up alone..” No, your friend ended up with him cause you have started to (without realizing maybe) be flirty with her boyfriend-she is hurt-sure-but wanted both of you spared of her justified anger…Scorpios are the type to rather cut you out from their life for some reasons than to be hypocrite to you…
    Maybe if you apologize and accept that you’ve gone a little overboard-she’d have more respect for you and try to forgive you..even if she does not renew the friendship with you afterwards..

  90. Ugh, I am so in the thick of this right now.

    Where to even start. Mine is a Sag moon, Leo Sun Scorpio Acs. Doesn’t get much sexier. We’ve known each other 20 plus years, but only became friends in the last 4 after a chance meeting. Turns out we have lived completely parallel lives – both married young to strikingly similar partners (both currently bored to death with them too), two kids the same ages, all the same interests, etc. Our sun signs are opposite, our Venus is opposite and we both have water signs that tend to dominate aspects of our sun signs (I’m Cancer Moon, Aquarius Sun Virgo Rising). There has been crazy attraction from day one, but we have pretty much squashed it except for little flirting here and there. All very civilized.

    About two months ago I admitted I had deeper feelings. It was a stupid thing to do, but I just couldn’t take it anymore in my mind and I know he feels it too. He of course wouldn’t admit to anything, but he doesn’t need to. I know he wouldn’t have bothered forging the friendship if he didn’t care. He said he did not mean to be harsh, but he was going to pretend I never told him so we could preserve our friendship. I was fine with that.

    He immediately went and told his wife, saying it was a tough decision but that ultimately he did it because she deserved to know. I was pissed; I kind of figured that since he didn’t admit to anything, he had no right telling what amounted to my business. But whatever, what’s done was done. He communicated for a few weeks, up until she decided to get involved. Which I handled, humbly. Even after that he still stayed responsive for a while, kept saying things would blow over and we would all coexist, but out of the blue last week just disappeared.

    I have very little experience with Scorpios, but I am wondering if this is what is happening now. I’m being amputated. Technically I didn’t do anything to “hurt” him – who gets hurt when they find out they are loved? But maybe it’s deeper than that. Who knows? I probably overloaded his ridiculously fragile ego.

  91. Elsa,

    This is a great article I’m a Scorpio with a Scorpio rising and I do the freezing out of people also. People often ask me why I feel it’s necessary to cut people out of my life and I often explain it as such,

    “I give people a rope when they wrong me.. They can either pull themselves back up and we move in a positive direction or they can choose to hang themselves with the rope! It’s completely their choice!”

    It truly is a preservation of self, sanity and to try to keep the little respect we have left for our offender in tact. It’s hard to express and explain without sounding mean, evil and like many have described a “succubus!”

    Scorpio’s generally don’t go around trying to hurt others. Honestly scorpios love with so much of themselves and their hearts, but they also have an ability to see psychically to the heart of the issue.

    Many times I’ve told boyfriend, friends, coworkers, family the outcome of a given situation months and years before it occurs. Scorpios can see the inner workings of something on a different scale or a different perspective than others. It pains us and I know because of my loving, motherly nature I try to nurture and teach… Hoping I can help without involving my stinger but sometimes it’s enevitable.

    I’m the kind of Scorpio that oozes scorpio. I have penetrating eyes, people always assume I’m flirting whether its male or female, when people guess my sign they automatically assume scorpio. I’ve learned to do “trial cut offs”

    I let people know I’m cutting them off because they’ve crossed my boundaries and I will go as far as blocking phone numbers and everything until I’m ready to speak. The reason for the extreme is because my Mercury (communication) is in sagg and I tend to be a little harsh with my words when hurt and angry… Especially to those I’ve let into my inner circle.

    All these years later … I’d reach out to your scorpio. We are not as unforgiving as it may seem. Especially if we are in the Eagle aspect of our sign.

  92. i find venus in capricorn –very very controlling and defensive
    often having a very narrow ‘take on life ‘, –
    if you are in they will dote on you -pick u up drop u off –butt its all for themselves really
    they get security by controlling their environment –
    at home in beaurocratic organisations where they seek advancment and recognition -status etc .well that sag’ moon is very in our face its playfull changable
    exuberent -attention seeking
    you /they cant help it -[jupiter rules this moon and gemini s opposite so playfull inconsistent -self indulgent emotions
    —know thyself!! -plenty more fish in the sea to play with .L.O.L.

  93. I love this thread.

    I have a Scorpio North Node conjunct my Uranus and opposite my Sun-Jupiter in the 6th-12th.

    I definitely amputate people. But only after I’ve given them chance after chance… and ONLY when it comes down to self-preservation. And it’s always quick and unexpected (to both me and them) – and I NEVER look back. Once the amputation occurs, it’s as if the relationship never existed.

    I almost amputated one person a couple weeks ago at the Mars/Neptune square when some deception was uncovered. But knowing me well, he anticipated an amputation and did some pretty heroic damage control. I’m still not out of my shell, but I’m not stinging any more, so… we’ll see.

  94. Chasing Kelly

    When someone has so much self loathing esp a Scorpio they cannot love anyone else properly? He is obviously very messed up…I have a similar Scorpio ex-lover, he adores me and I him but he’s having counselling for his issues from his upbringing, I will not get involved with someone who cannot live freely. Mine goes between being cold (his own protective measure) and caring in the most beautiful ways but you see this is their problem and ultimately cruel. I know he’s not a player and these are true feelings, I know many of his associates.

    Sorry this is this way for you. He is not stable and you should just allow him to move on and open your heart for someone who can give you without reserve. I know this is hard because Scorpios can be incredibly passionate and evoke very deep emotion from people, they are transformational people you see, but that doesn’t mean they are meant to be. He was the love of my life but I won’t waste the rest of it pining after someone who is not capable of giving (and he isn’t)

  95. Fire crab, thanks so much for your reply. I am sorry for your situation as well. You are spot on with him having issues. His mom died of alcoholism when he was very young and he had a very turbulent childhood – he battles a very low self esteem & tries to hide it. I think it was easier for him to move on once he found out I was moving, but it is hard for me to understand because I don’t cut people off, I don’t stop speaking to them. But, being in a new city will help.

  96. Yes having a new start will help, I don’t cut people off either but sometimes I understand the need to “amputate” if it is t meant to be, it can be too painful and a waste of your life waiting for someone to sort their head and heart out, give yourself a fresh new start!
    Scorpios have ALWAYS transformed me, it’s always been painful although sometimes it’s been helpful to my growth, but I am very wary of getting sucked into their intensity now.

  97. Amputated by a Scorpio bf this year. Didn’t see it coming. I was hoping and willing to work on us. Why does he keep messaging me? I would rather he stayed gone. I doubt I can ever be friends with him again. He’s always told me “exes are exes for a reason” however, now that we are exes, he continues to message me and act like he cares. Can he please stay gone and leave me alone? I do have feelings for him still but my only choice is moving on and working on my self.

    -Heartbroken Leo Woman

  98. I have a scorpio stellium…I amputate, after a lot of agonising on my part and definitely as a last resort… I try and talk things out, I try and work things out in my head…I take a lot of shit before I say enough…

    I have recently amputated my ex, who is a Scorp AC (our ascendants are within 3 degrees of eachother but I am a Sadge AC with a 12th H scorpio Sun, he is Aries)…I didn’t think he saw it coming, since I tried to be okay with his totally selfish behaviour months after our break up…but then I had to give up, he was already going out with a woman 20 years younger than him and started that relationship within months after breaking up with me and a relationship where we were going to get married…then he started writing me emails of how he missed me and how important i was etc…I confronted and said I know about your relationship you should stop writing all this, he didnt stop, I stopped responding, it was painful still to receive his emails on one hand and know his news of the projects and travels with his new girlfriend who had totally replaced me in his life…he didnt want to let go of me and I was so heartbroken, he called me because I didnt answer his mails…I said, it’s enough, I have nothing to say to him, I have lost him and he has lost me too…He is still trying in strange ways, being very indirect about it…It’s still painful, because I love him but I cannot take it anymore for my sanity, for my life…

    So yes, I amputate, when it’s absolutely absolutely necessary and I am sure I can vouch for other scorpios that it’s equally painful to be on this end as it is on the receiving end.

  99. I have amputated people when I could no longer bear to have them in my life. It is very painful for me, but I must protect myself. Taking a thorn out hurts but it has to be done before the flesh rots.
    – Scorpio sun and ascendant.

  100. This is an interesting topic because I used to believe the only time I “amputated” a person was when they stabbed me in the back (unforgettable, imo and therefore impossible to continue a relationship with). I rationalized that they were untrustworthy and did not deserve my friendship. This is a true belief. I am far from perfect but the loss of my friendship will make them regret they ever told my secrets (or whatever great injustice was done by them) because they will miss me. I think I still believe this but it hasn’t happened in a long, long time.

    Ha! It’s no wonder a Scorpio moon (me) is so mistrustful.

    Lately however, I noticed that I have been shutting out someone who has been a friend for a very long time. This is because I feel badly after we speak. I feel like she’s judging me and that she doesn’t “get” me anymore. This is difficult for a Scorpio moon – to be in a relationship where we don’t really connect. I have not “amputated” her and would never want to hurt her but the thing is, with Scorpio moon, relationships are profound and are not entered into lightly. If something is amiss, it does have to be removed completely. I’m not sure why, maybe because we don’t do half-measures. It’s just the way it is.

    • I understand self-preservation. However, what this person did was mean and there is no explanation for it. From my perspective we went from friends to zero in no time and he refused to explain it. But, he was never able to communicate, he always shut down when it came to talking about feelings. My observation is that is why he is a big partier, always planning big destination trips with big groups of people and it’s always a big party – stay busy so you don’t have to think kind of thing. He is not the type that you can have a deep conversation with, he won’t let you. I believe I was the only person in his life that was grounded and had those kind of conversations. I wasn’t taking recreational drugs and drinking every weekend to numb myself. He ended up resenting me for it is what I think. He was also not the “great friend” that I read about Scorps being. He was a complete flake and lied to me several times, as he did all his “friends”. I was always there for him because I believed he had more potential than he was showing and I believed I saw good in him, I know I saw glimpses of it. When he was with me he wanted to be good – I was the light attracting the dark. It is so hard to move past it because of me knowing him to be one way towards me and then turning into some evil person who refused to ever speak to me with no explanation and all I have is what my sister tells me to go on. I feel like I am in the Twilight Zone. I have never had conflict like this with anyone.

  101. Chasing Kelly

    I think Scorpios (and those with strong Scorpio influences such as Scorpio moons) can amputate THEMSELVES or parts of themselves, I know a Scorpio moon (square sun) who just is so driven they never really confront or deal with their emotions, until they come out in illness. Likewise with damaged people, I know one who started counselling but stopped as the “can if worms” was too big it would never go away. So they locked it up and threw away the key.

    I can see this will be a very long healing for you. Believe me I’ve been there (still am in many ways) please don’t waste your life pining after someone who can’t change, until he heals and starts to understand and love himself (you are not his saviour or counsellor) he will only cause heart ache and destruction. People who are that damaged are actually very adept with evoking emotion in others quite naturally but freeze when it comes to dealing with their own, but they crave and want closeness and emotion but cannot let go to trust, you will end up a dried husk, they can be like emotional vampires. As empathetic as I am to whatever scars they may have, there is a point when behaviour is either “right” or “wrong”, he is and should be an adult.

    In my case I have a passive aggressive Scorpio who does NOT amputate as such, but pushes and tests to see if I will (he has moon/mars Cancer) but ACTIONS are the things to trust not words. Damaged people operate on a different level of (in) sensitivity, they don’t even notice things that may really hurt you because they have become numb and cut off their own sensitivities.

    I think this has been valuable to me hearing this as I read back my own words from a few months back and realise I have a way to go…please understand this is not preaching…I am going through the same thing just perhaps a bit further along.

    This Stellium passage of so many planets in Scorpio has us all examining the nature of cutting off, sacrifice, unconditional giving and intensity, death both real and metaphorical. It’s tough, Scorpio gets to our very souls, the deepest parts of us we perhaps didn’t even know existed, the ugliness ..and the light…it’s transformational, if you must burn be a Pheonix!!

  102. Some peoples behaviour deserves to be put in the freezer! ..but generally speaking I think just cutting people off with no explanation or attempt at healing is immature…it shows an unwillingness to confront things and forgive and ultimately is actually worse for the amputators psyche than the person they cut off. Yes there are unforgivable behaviours that breach our standards and expectations for ourselves but the person needs to be told that.

  103. I can relate to First Degree Burn’s comments way back there. It can be a delightful hobby, fueled by the betrayal’s sting. Everybody’s got a different way of getting it out of their system. Some people do it quickly and are done, like maybe Aries. But the deep hurt Scorpio feels sometimes encourages a protracted period of vengeance. Outsiders don’t know how much it can kill a Scorpio inside. Really, you don’t. Saying “get over it” or something like that won’t cut it.

  104. As a Scorpio myself.. We will ice you if we feel you are playing games, superficial, or just not being truthful, or not valuing the relationship. Most of what we believe ..is tied to loyalty and honesty … When two and two don’t add up to four… I immediately seem suspicious.. I will withdraw as long as I need to protect myself…to understand your motives.. When I or if I feel that the relationship should go on … Then I proceed… When I Let go of someone… I grieve for months if not years … It’s not easy to do … Or is fun… I will think about that person frequently….this is quiet painful!

  105. Do Scorpios really stay away from deep loving connections? Why did he push me to the limit with his passive aggressive words and his mind games, contact then no contact? I lost it and said he disgusted me. I have never been so hurt by anyone before. I never let anyone in before until him. I cared more tha he realizes but I had to protect myself. He didn’t argue back, just froze me out. How can a person that says they care for you, treat you like dirt ? I lost it, expressed my hurt. Are Scorpios so darn perfect they think they are above hurt? I feel they are really missing the big picture. I only freeze out people that break my trust.

  106. I just ran across your article. I am a Libra with Taurus rising. My daughter is Scorpio, Aries rising. We were the best of friends during her teen years and even into her young adult years. We’ve had plenty of fights along the way — some of which I could she her cutting out of her life for. After she got married we maintained the closeness even though she was living in another state. I paid for her wedding, made the floral arrangements and paid for and shipped the decorations. She thanked me and I was happy, but I never put myself in the position of making it an issue for my own gratification. Last May she went 50/50 with her brother on a Mother’s Day gift for me. In July she started emailing me about how she had asked her brother for advice about getting a passport. His response was the same as that given by Homeland Security. She didn’t like the answer and instead of addressing her contention with him, she peppered me with emails about how she was through with him. The emails were so profuse coming to my work email, I had to block her. I then sent her a letter and told her that she was handling the issue in a negative way and that it seemed that when it came to family members, she always took the negative road. She immediately cut me off (froze me out) and told her friends on Facebook that I had hurt her feelings and that she had decided to cut me out of her life in June. I’m confused. A Mother’s Day gift in May; she decides to cut me out of her life in June, but then contacts me in July to create an issue so she can cut me out of her life??? As a Libra, I am cut to the core. What hurts more is that she is due to deliver a child and I am to be forever cut out of the child’s life. What can I do to get our relationship back on track with my daughter and have a relationship with my granddaughter?

  107. And you scorps out there, stop the free therapy sessions for all your thankless so called friends. Let people take full responsibility for their problems and learn to work them out on their own or with the help of a fully qualified psychotherapist who is PAID to do that job.

    Scorps, you think you’re doing people a favour but you’re sooo not. You’re simply supporting them in their refusal to take their emotional issues seriously enough to seek expert professional help. Why should they when they have you on tap.

    And the karmic repercussions on scorpios as they misguidedly take on problems that other people refuse to shoulder themselves are substantial, often leaving them weak, exhausted and depleted, often without a word of thanks or appreciation from their beneficiaries. It’s funny how they all remember how incredibly important you are to them when you’ve finally cut them off for good.

    *********** I agree with this one above ***********

    I have read through most of the comments. Its hard to read some of it. Boy people have a lot to say about Scorpio. I don’t think there is another sign where people have this much to say. Sounds like a lot of you really LOVED the Scorpio person are were really taken by them…..

    I know this. A lot of Scorpios were abused as children. By adulthood most have seen the dark side of human nature and know it well….and can see through bullshit.

    I think Scorpio is the must misunderstood sign. I also think next to Pisces its the most USED sign. You need a friend to listen to you agonize endlessly ….you need one to prop you up and give you what you need and then kick you back in the ring….. call your Scorpio.

    More later…..

  108. I have a Scorpio stellium. I’m not as strong as people percieve me to be. It takes a lot of energy to manage my tumultuous inner landscape. I just don’t always have a lot for others. I’m sure some would call me self absorbed. I am actually. But it’s better for those around me. I don’t want to take them to the abyss with me. I don’t want to destroy anyone.

    Another thought. People are confused by me because my decisions and conclusions seem to be drawn out of thin air. When in fact I have agonized and put myself through hell to express myself. I have to be around people that take my words seriously. If I say “I’m tired”, that means “I’ve been tired for a long time and I’m struggling with it.” This is actually one of my gauges for a potential relationship. What is their reaction when I speak from my soul?

    That’s all I can write at the moment though I have a lot of thoughts. Thanks for writing this Elsa:)

    • I’m this close to freezing someone out. I thought it might be helpful for others to know what’s going on in scorpios head right before the freezing out happens. In this case it seems like everytime I think things are ok between us he will say or do something that makes me feel like he’s suspicious or unsure about me. He’s actually used the words “I’m unsure”. It’s making me feel very insecure. It’s very uncomfortable because I feel like I’ve been a very good friend to this person. I mean I’m a human being but I’ve been there for him. Ultimately why I feel the need to pull away is because I’m not being appreciated. If I feel for a second that my presence is not wanted or valued I do not feel comfortable. Im feeling very taken for granted. Who wants to feel like that? I’m sure other signs would deal with these feelings in a different way but I just want OUT. I feel powerless and I have to feel powerful. Not over him but over myself. I’m not going to put myself in a position to be vulnerable with this person if my feelings are not going to be treated with respect. I’m sure he’ll be surprised because I’ve always been available. And I haven’t expressed how crappy I feel. I’m not saying it’s right or cool at all. But it’s how Im able to survive in this situation. And ultimately I want people around me that support me and who I am and help me with my survival, not threaten it.

      • I should also mention that i am dreading doing this. I know it will hurt me more than it hurts him. I know this. I know I will be in for a lot of pain and anguish. But I will have my personal power.

  109. I didn’t go through all comments – too many! – but yes, I’ve been frozen out by a Scorpio last year. I had the most intense crush over this foreign guy who played in my band, a witty, handsome, sexy as hell Virgo rising. He started being flirty with me and sh*t and I led him on. We started having very deep conversations, but I can be a tad too intense when I’m into someone – I wanted to dig into his Soul and maybe it was too much too soon for him. So at some point he kinda cut me off, only to come back later on a seldom basis. We no longer talk as much as we used to but I know the attraction was mutual and maybe still is, he just doesn’t seem to want to go back there anymore especially now that I have a committed relationship to take care of (which he’s aware of).
    But still.. I still think Scorpios are among the most fascinating creatures of this Planet, and I really Love them.

  110. Self-preservation and/or punishment. It sends a message. But it’s not a message you can reply to. It is one you have to live with. It’s final.

    • Wow, this was an interesting post and the comments (yes, I read every single one) were just as fascinating and eye-opening. The fact that the comments have continued literally for YEARS says a lot… this is a fascinating subject. Soup said something I wonder about, “I know this. A lot of Scorpios were abused as children. By adulthood most have seen the dark side of human nature and know it well….and can see through bullshit. I think Scorpio is the must misunderstood sign. I also think next to Pisces its the most USED sign. You need a friend to listen to you agonize endlessly ….you need one to prop you up and give you what you need and then kick you back in the ring….. call your Scorpio.”

      I find this to be a perfect description of me… I suffered horrible abuse as a child. I won’t go into the details. But I have put up with horrible things out of people, all the while thinking I was the problem, because that’s what I was told most of my life by those closest to me, so I believed them for years. Not till I met my very stable Libra husband 21 years ago did I start down the path to healing. It’s been a long hard road, but I’m getting there. Now I don’t tolerate that bullshit anymore. I’m 48 years old and my abusive mother just passed away last year, giving me the first moments of peace. I really should have given up on that toxic relationship when I was 18, but I hung in there for dear life, thinking someday she would come to value and appreciate me in some way. Never happened. After her death, my family didn’t even tell me she had passed… they held the funeral without me. Did I mention these people are not even my blood? Yeah, I was adopted. So that was pretty much the final straw for me. I didn’t even get any closure, so at that point I simply cut them off entirely. Amputated, finally.

      I was fortunate enough to find what remains of my biological family, and to my great relief they don’t resemble my nasty adoptive family AT ALL. They’re pretty cool, actually. Well, after all this stuff, I have decided that it is perfectly okay not to subject myself any longer to toxic relationships, and I have easily amputated a few more unhealthy friendships without so much as a backwards glance. It’s sort of like spring cleaning, and I feel SO much better. I finally figured out that it wasn’t ME that was the problem… most of my friends never treated me that way, my son and husband never treated me that way… those people were just crazy, and I was crazier for putting up with it! Never again!

  111. I’m a Scorpio sun and rising Aquarius. I personally have freezed people out, mostly as lessons to those people and I usually do it gently and slowly cut off all contact. I also do it when I feel that the other person is relying on me too much and using me. I’ve mostly only frozen people out because I feel they need to be able to live on their own without me doing things for them. Also, to determine if a Scorpio is a friend and is only testing you by being cruel or if they don’t like you and is being cruel, look at how they interact with those around them. Personally, my tests aren’t difficult or painful as I am only testing for honesty and intelligence but I will become cruel if I find someone annoying and I will find the best way to hurt them without seeming like it to anyone on the outside.

  112. I recently had to amputate someone. They betrayed me, that’s why. Sometimes it’s just that simple. I could be a phony and pretend to forgive her, but I don’t. Integrity is important to me. And I’m not going to keep her around just to punish her. Because I don’t think I could contain the urge to hurt her.

  113. I finally get this. Completely. Had no idea I was actually the Scorpio (plutonian really). I’ve done this a few times and self-preservation is exactly it. I didn’t know that I was this person until today.

    I’ve had to leave a lot of people and places behind because I just don’t have anymore energy to give. In order to live my life I can’t see a single reminder of what I’m leaving behind. I torch it all behind me. It’s not out of malice or entirely out of anger against another person. I miss things but I’m rebuilding and I can’t give away that energy to people that have proven to drain me/ not keep me afloat.

    A friend just asked if I liked the intermediary people who also get cut off and I told him it isn’t about that. I like them but it makes no difference. The friend of my enemy is my enemy, to be blunt. I went through hell with their friend, I never want to be even remotely near them again. I don’t want to be around anything that reminds me because its too painful or I don’t get enough out of the interaction. I’m not uplifted by it.

    Just saw this above me:”If you’ve ever hit rock bottom, been to hell and back Pluto-style, because of a relationship, you don’t want to go there again… ” – Plutonian If a relationship is beyond salvage because everything about the foundation is rotten and the people involved aren’t willing or able to own their shit and stop accepting the unacceptable I have to go.

    I’m also currently learning about the boundaries I lacked, still lack, and how to maintain them. Everytime I’m being tugged back by someone, I struggle with whether or not I can come back to that branch but I don’t believe I can come back at all. Its difficult but its what I have to do for my own sanity right now.

    “I literally put people in the freezer. Is that bad?” – Moon Neptune. I hope you’re still doing this and taking requests.

  114. I really don’t understand the whole revenge, getting back to etc. I recently experienced some sort of revenge from a Scorpio girl. She was so paranoid about where I am and what I do and accused me of something that I didn’t do. I never cheated in my life and I believe in fairness and truth. If i’m not happy in a relationship and like someone else i just say it. I fell asleep one night without saying goodnight and she accused me of cheating lol.

    Everyone has been hurt in life, but revenge in my eyes it’s exactly the opposite of what you Scorpios thing it is…it’s just weakness. Looking back she planned her revenge to a T for couple weeks. I chose to ignore her act and asked her to please get out of my life, no one needs such controlling and manipulative psychos in their life.

    And for you Scorpios that get hurt and try to justify your partner’s cheating acts: let’s not forget that you signed up in a partnership, your fault for being in that relationship and partially your fault for the relationship not working.

    So stop wining, learn from it, forgive and you will become a better person.

  115. Im a Pisces with a rising in Capricorn & moon in Gemini. I feel the only sign that can handle my complex personality is Scorpio & what I’ve come to realize about those “mind games” is that your Scorpio is just figuring you out .If you feel a Scorpio has figured you out and is playing with your emotions SPEAK UP. Tell them they know everything. Tell them they are geniuses & that they know just what to do to piss you off .Always Give them space to process you . They don’t always know how they feel til they completely understand your emotional patterns for themselves. I usually channel my anger into sexual energy so my Scorpio wife makes me mad on purpose now. Im financially stable &ridiculously generous to my wife and im being completely honest when i say her body is the only body I get hard for. She is my princess and im a free spirit so i try not to make her feel caged in whenever shes with me .she means the world to me .I guess my obsessiveness works for her advantage in that area .we’ve been married for 6 years and my advice is be yourself and I speak your mind. Give space for yourself and your partner so you can have energy to love each other properly .Communication is key .Scorpio is a sign that hides their feelings already so both partners being secretive about how they feel won’t be very beneficial to the relationship. Just a tip

  116. I went through two scorpio amputations (just a correct word) and they were both so similar that my psyche related these two together automatically: I dreamt of the first scorpio almost every night for a whole month when I first met the second scorpio. They both just decided to never respond to me or meet me again. The first one was a friend from school whom I spent a lot of time with during university because I wasn’t interested in making new friends since I was terribly depressed and it was fun being together anyway. I never talked to him about it. After many years of simply being stupefied about why he ended things so suddenly, I started doubting that he may have been developing feelings towards me and just decided to cut things off before things went down the hill. The second scorpio was even a bigger mystery box because he approached me personally. It would make one think he was interested and we know how relentless scorpios get about things that interest them. I did nag to him about my day to day difficulties and listened to his advice as part of my own testing system (capricorn sun, etc..) but I never over did it. I dont leach onto people for emotional support, that’s just how it is. We mostly talked about diverse things and interests. But then, just when I realized that he became totally comfortable with me and dropped the knight in the shining armor act, he started to vanish for months and then turn up again and became vindictive and disagreed with me on everything or simply ignore me during conversations. I got angry but I was ever forgiving and took everything that went wrong as part of my shortcomings because I really did like him (with my venus, mars and asc in Pisces) and I tried to make things click back on properly again. Funny thing is, the more I tried the worse things got. And then came the amputation. And so, I believe that self preservation for Scorpio works in two ways although it’s all related to the fact that sometimes they can’t handle the depths of their emotion towards a person: (1) if the person is too abusive and (2) if they are not ready to invest in it… which is what happened with me I guess.

  117. I’m a Virgo female with Venus/Mars Scorpio and I met a Scorpion male about 3weeks ago…we had great conversation, extreme chemistry, we laughed, talked…then suddenly, he just vanishes on me…Rained Ice down on me and banished me to Siberia…this after telling me that he thought I was the Total Package that he wanted and needed.

    I’m sorry…I don’t get it. I did nothing wrong, did not break trust with him or sap him of his precious energy…just a gal wanting to go out on a date with a guy that I was Perfect.

    And it’s not the Freezing out that hurts so much..it’s the fact that within this 3wk silent period, I’ve sent emails asking him he he just wanted to forget about it…he answered back, said no…that he didn’t want to hurt me (whatever that meant) and then went silent again.

    I’ve tried the sending him emails just to remind him that I’m still interested and genuinely am concerned about him..and crickets…absolutely nothing from him.

    As a Virgo, we don’t let people in very much, we don’t allow people to come in too close, so to have this guy gain my trust and just walk away without any explanation or at least a get lost…I don’t get it.

    Scorpios are not God’s Gift and no matter how deeply they feel, it needs to be said that there are OTHER PEOPLE ON THE EARTH THAT HAVE FEELINGS TOO.

    I find this behavior cruel and childish.

    I just sent him an email telling him Later as in MUCH MUCH…and the Scorpio in Venus/Mars will mean he’ll never get the chance to say another word to me…which is sad because had he only explained it to me, I probably would’ve understood.
    I don’t understand cruelty and life is too short for games.

    Brokenhearted Virgo Gal

  118. I think sometimes I freeze someone out if I feel like I’ve hurt them in some way. It’s more like exiling myself than freezing the other out, but it comes across as something malicious. I think if a scorpio is unsure if they’re good for the other or not they will not engage. Its a compassionate move in the eyes of the scorpio.

    • Libra Noir — I appreciate your take on the situation and can even understand that a bit…however, I am old enough to know what’s good for me and what’s not.
      As I told him in response to his “I don’t want to hurt you more” line, I replied that I should at least be given the opportunity to decide whether or not I wish to continue, and this is what upsets me the most..it feels as though he’s totally taken away my power to decide anything…to engage or not, to communicate or not. I honestly don’t think it’s being done in a malicious manner, but it sure feels manipulative as hell. Yet the flip side of this behavior is also being done with conscious effort — meaning each time I’ve sent him email asking him if he wanted me to just go away, he has responded to that only once with a resounding no.

      So, my question is this: If Scorpio are big on trust and fear a partner/potential partner will leave them, how can they (Scorpio) treat others in such a manner? It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy — push people away enough and most times, they will leave.
      Funny thing is , he’s been stalking me on a social website we both belong to. I finally blocked him from viewing my profile and have cut off all avenues of giving him access to me.
      If he wants me, he’ll have to surface and say it.

      He and I have so many things in common and it really took a lot for me to remove the walls I’d built around my heart and let him in. I mean, he asked me out, we set the time/day for the date, and he just vanished. Gosh..I hadn’t been stood up on a date since high school!
      And when I wrote my above post, I was so mad I could’ve spit nails…if he does resurface and approach me, I would speak with him again…but I’ll be much more guarded this time. He won’t find me so amenable this go round because now, I don’t trust that he won’t do it again. I hear that can be a pattern with some Scorps.

      In the end though, it’s not about words. It’s about actions.
      Actions ALWAYS speak louder than words.

      Thanks for your insight though. It is appreciated.

  119. I am a Scorpio mother and have frozen out my own daughter. How I loved her, doted on her…I gave her my heart and soul….she was my sunshine. I was Demeter to her Persephone. She married and had a child, my first grandchild. I thought I couldn’t love a child more than my own daughter but I am besotted with my granddaughter. I also thought that nothing could tear my relationship with my daughter apart, but I was wrong. If you want to hurt a Scorpio, lie to them. If you want a Scorpio out of your life, disrespect them, take them for granted, use them for your own gain. You see, we don’t love easily. When we do, we give ourselves completely but you must be worthy of it. We don’t tolerate, from anyone, deceit, insincerity, ill manners

  120. I am a Scorpio mother and have frozen out my own daughter. How I loved her, doted on her…I gave her my heart and soul….she was my sunshine. I was Demeter to her Persephone, we even got these tattooed on our arms. She married and had a child, my first grandchild. I thought I couldn’t love a child more than my own daughter but I am besotted with my granddaughter. I also thought that nothing could tear my relationship with my daughter apart, but I was wrong. If you want to hurt a Scorpio, lie to them. If you want a Scorpio out of your life, disrespect them, take them for granted, use them for your own gain. You see, we don’t love easily. When we do, we give ourselves completely but you must be worthy of it. We don’t tolerate, from anyone, deceit, insincerity, ill manners, or rudeness. So, there it is…..it’s over.

    • Lisa I am also a Scorpio mother who has had to step back from my child who I’ve loved so much there are no words. Doted on him gave him my heart and soul, he also my sunshine. Same thing, had a child. My first precious grandchild. This child is the absolute love of my life….I just kept on giving.

      I have been used, talked about, lied to, talked to like dirt, schemed for money, taken for granted, oh the deceit, insincerity, ill manners and rudeness …and he also let his wife do it.

      It’s over. I will always love and adore my child but until he is mature enough to reciprocate and give some love and concern in return. I have to step back. It’s hurts too much. Hurts so much I have walked around unable to function. No….no more. The pain is just too great.

  121. I used to be obsessed with figuring out this sign- I wanted to understand how someone is able to touch something inside you so deeply, to understand you without any words spoken. Scorpio is beyond fascinating and mysterious. I have always attracted them since I was knew high, lol. First experience was 4th grade, my first crush. It’s always the same kind of dynamics at first. Like the staring and energy dance, eye sexing etc… it’s a lot of fun…way too much fun to be the Scorpios object of interest. My first boyfriend was Scorpio, I was 12… I seriously will never forget how I felt when I was pulled in by him. Its was like heaven on earth honestly. I was treated like a queen in the center of my own fairyland. Now he’s my husband. A big time lapse happened from Jr high to the time we married. In the mean time, inbetween not seeing each other, I fell deeply in love with another Scorpio. The true love of my life. But circumstance was always in the way of us being together. He has always loved me from afar..extremely deeply. But out of compassion, he didn’t engage when I wanted him to. He engaged when he wanted to, to find out something… or when he had a moment of weakness, or wanted to make love to someone who loves him more than anyone else ever could..who knows? He definitely knew something I didn’t. Ah well…

  122. Well, I guess the writing’s on the wall. I think he’s really gone and has chosen someone else. I am devastated.

    I just don’t understand how he could have engaged me, got me to open up and tell him my heart’s desire and then just drop me like a bad habit.

    Of course I have no proof of this…just something I feel, even though I’ve been holding out hope..hope against hope. It took a very long time for me to get to a place where I could let someone in and now I feel as though I’ve been knocked back 100 paces, kicked in the stomach and spat on.

    The really devious thing was that I found out he had been “stalking” my profile online for quite sometime and even managed to run off one of my friends…he won’t even speak to me now. I am honestly baffled by how this all happened but moreso, WHY?

    Out of all the people on the site, he chose me to hurt. I am so…I don’t even have words for it.

    Now, I will have to figure out a way to balance what he has done to me against how I will have to approach new guys that might be interested in me….I just can’t believe that he’s taken me back to a place where I said I never wanted to be again.
    Maybe this was the lesson? To go back and review how I approach love? I don’t know.

    I am just beyond devastated, shocked and very, very sad.

    • I’m sorry 🙁 I understand the pain. I wish they did explanations, but they just don’t, usually. It sucks. Just try to be the best version of yourself you can be. This is sort of vengeful thinking, but they don’t like to see people to get over them easily. It most likely will bother him.

      • If he sees you move on easily and are doing even better than before, he might even come back into your life. This may be manipulative, but it’s worked for me. Although I was a teenager when I did this, so.. But, I do know Scorpio.

        • Yes, I have heard this about Scorps. But using this tactic could totally backfire on me…you know…
          “Be careful what you wish for.”

          Besides being manipulative is NEVER good Karma.

    • Sorry to hear your pain, I underatabd similar has happened. Who knows why….could be anything from an ill equipped emotional reaction to a sociopathic one…the important thing is to 100% realise it’s about his issues not you. Hard I know when you trust and open up but 9/10 “rejection” is more about the other person than ourselves. Don’t let this stop you from loving but sift through it for the lesson being easy on yourself…there always is one 🙂

      • You know, I’m in my mid 40’s, so it’s not as though I’ve never had heartache before, and I’m not even mad/hurt over him going with someone else…it’s not about that.

        Some people might read my first post and be like: “But dang, it was only 3weeks that you met/knew him. That’s not even a relationship.”

        I tell you that it is. Each of us, are in relationships with the other once you meet them and have some kind of interaction. We are in relationships to those we work with, those we casually know in lives.

        Yet somehow, I never picked up on this facet of his personality. Which is rather odd, since I have a lot of Water in my chart (Virgo Sun, Cap Ascendant, Gemini Moon, then the rest is Cancer, Pisces in the 12th and Scorpio). I’m usually able to pick up on undercurrents of things..but Him…I never saw it coming that it would transpire the way that it did.

        One thing I can tell you is that once you reach my age, hopefully, you understand very quickly that it’s okay to be rejected by someone. My Grandma had a saying: “Rejection is the Universe’s/God’s Protection.” So like I said, I’m not upset that he found someone. Truth of it is, I’m glad because this means that he won’t have an opportunity to further hurt/damage me emotionally.

        I called up my BFF, she married a Scorp and asked her husband what he thought of the situation, by letting him read a few emails from him. He says that he thinks I scared him. That once he discovered that I was capable of giving him the relationship that he actually wanted, he got scared and ran. Because as he put it: “Any man that says he likes you/wants you/desires you the way he told you, no matter how busy he is, will make the time to see/be with you. This is particularly true with Scorpios.”

        This made a lot of sense to me.

        As for moving on and living the good life…that’s gonna be pretty easy. I say this because, in hindsight, it is a VERY GOOD THING that it was so brief. This means that I wasn’t too emotionally invested in the thing and with Pisces in my 12th house (house of secrets/hidden things/subconscious), I am able to process a lot of things when I dream. And dream I did last night. Typically when I dream, I dont’ remember it very vividly, but it usually consists of me sitting straight up in bed from a dead sleep with the message the only thing remaining.
        My message this morning at 3:53am was: “Let it go.” And just like that, I felt better.

        My friend’s husband says to be vigilant, that he’s going to be back “because he desires you.” And that any Scorpio male that is willing to state that so quickly, so openly is already “obsessed with you.”

        Had he caught me out like this 20yrs ago, I would make him pay upon his return (Scorpio in Venus/Mars), but now older age and wisdom just says to “pick your battles wisely.” It’s not worth my time.

        Thanks for all the support. But I’m going to be okay…in fact, better than okay. Today is a whole nother 24hrs.

        I wokeup this morning feeling much better and with a different, more positive outlook.

        • Great! And I agree with much of what you say…
          The “love of my life” is a Scorpio…he bolted and hurt me dreadfully… But we stayed in contact (no intimacy) and 4 years later we are good friends, he is not capable of being in a relationship (depression) he also feels he can’t provide for me as he would like to (which is his issue) and I decided he is not good for me…He as much told me it (ne and us) all terrified him…I love him so much but it is what it is and we’ve found peace after much haranguing each other. He is better as a friend but I do rely on his strength to keep it there as there is big chemistry between us.

          • Elemis:

            Thank you for sharing.

            I think the strangest thing about this ordeal, is that right from the get-go…it was as if we’ve known each other our entire lives.

            I read Tarot cards (but in this instance, I had to go my other friend that reads cards because I was too close to the situation to have an objectivity)..I had her do a couple of readings and what she said was that it was a Past-Life connection/Karmic.
            Which is true because we both remarked on how comfortable we felt with each other. My horoscopes for the entire month of March kept saying that I would encounter a Past-Life Teacher/Guru and that it would be eye-opening experience…then to boot, he appeared out of nowhere on March 22nd, the day of an Full Moon Eclipse in Libra.

            He expressed that he wanted to be “open, honest and communicate with me”…the he knew what he “liked”, and that he was “open to answering any questions” that I had.
            He wanted to “take it to the next level.”
            We even discussed that Karma/Destiny/Fate/Free Will.

            All-in-all, this gives me some small measure of comfort…that he did like me and that it is his Free Will that makes this situation so. My card reading friend says that the Universe will continue to work out his Free Will and to expect a message sometime around the new Full Moon in Scorpio {May 4th}. That it would be a message that would make clear everything and that the Universe would let me know that “it is meant for me.” Don’t know what the it is, and not too concerned about it either.
            She says that he’s still stuck in the past pain of his previous relationship and that meeting me was too much for him, so he chose to find someone else to help assuage his pain/guilt, but that in time, he would find that I was the “real deal”…and also to be vigilant because the 8 of Wands was the outcome…he would be back.

            It’s just too bad that he has poor communication skills. Because, really, I’ve been in that dark place of dealing with the pain of a bad breakup. I’ve been in that place where I was stuck and couldn’t move…for 11yrs!
            I’ve had two dates in 11yrs and have been celibate for 9 of those eleven…so yea, I can SO totally relate.

            I’ve had a Saturn transit for the past 12yrs and I swear, I don’t want to incur any bad Karma…mine is clear right now, and this means that even though I won’t allow him back in, if he does contact me, I will at least forgive him.

            Sounds crazy, right? LOL

            • No not crazy, mines sun/uranus is exact conjunct my South Node I always knew it was an inevitable parting and encounter. I would see signs with his name on it all the time (unusual) and I had a synchronous incident about us that to this day I find hard to comprehend. I think strangely he believes it more than I (and I’m the esoteric one!)

              It’s taken me 4 years to get truly over the longing. Having him help by talking to me and being open was both a blessing and curse.
              I know it’s horrible not having direct answers but scarred people can be hurtful. You have a great understanding and strength to move forward.
              Life is short …we must move forward

              Blessings to you xx

        • “Any man that says he likes you/wants you/desires you the way he told you, no matter how busy he is, will make the time to see/be with you. This is particularly true with Scorpios.” True. Unless it’s that he is hung up on someone else. If this is the issue, he will probably never tell you this, of course. Sometimes, Scorpios I’ve known, hold out for people for a long time. They have trouble letting go sometimes. He may have developed feelings for you, and backed off because he didn’t want his feelings for you to overshadow his feelings for whoever he still holds onto. Anyhoo…you should come to the boards if you need advice. More people may weigh in.

          • PIseas314 – Thank you for your insight.
            On a rational level, I understand what you are saying and this too makes perfect sense, and if this is indeed the case, I can respect and accept it.
            Since I’ve no way of knowing for certain what is going on with him, I can only go with what my intuition is telling me (and even this could be way off the mark–but I don’t feel it is).

            In the past, when something of this nature has occurred (offering love and being rejected), I would just walk away and never look back, however, there is something quite different about this situation.

            I don’t know why I feel that I should I offer him love and compassion when he is obviously so not willing/ready to accept it from me. I can only say that I deeply feel that I am to do, without any expectation of his acceptance…do it because I feel that I should assist him into stepping into his “Full Power”…to become his authentic self.

            Yes, I will admit that I wish to be there in his life if/when this happens, but yet understand/accept that I may not be in the final chapter. This is okay with me.

            I will come back periodically and update any changes or not.
            And if I need any advice, I will most definitely avail myself of any offers of assistance/advice that may be forthcoming from people here.

            Again, thanks.

  123. Here’s an update:

    Last time I was here, I said that I would be receiving some message or that something would be revealed over the Scorpio full moon….

    Well…it happened…only I can’t make heads or tails of it.
    No. I did not receive a message from said Scorpion Male…

    What happened was this…but first let me preface what I’m about to say with a statement:

    There is some kind of major shift/transformation/awakening going on in my life, and not to be all metaphysical, but this is not something that one can discuss with lots of people, so I came here because You Scorpions here, will understand…not what is happening in my situation, but will understand the idea or transformational processes.

    So here goes:

    On the 1st May, I was still kinda feeling in a funk about the whole situation between (Let’s call him Sentinel) and myself. I realized that I was in grieving process even though I wasn’t consciously aware of it. I also realized at this point, that it was okay to grieve and in doing this, that heavy, dark feeling seem to lift…Systems Go.

    On 2nd May, I decided to go hang out in the Nature Preserve by my house…just be in Nature and all that means. While sitting on a bench, I asked the Universe to send me some kind of sign that “this” (Sentinel or the situation) was meant for me.
    A few minutes later, I was looking up a the bright, blue sky and saw a cloud that seemed to come down towards me….it was the strangest sensation of like falling. None of the other surrounding clouds seemed to exhibit this behavior, so I continued looking…cloud kept coming down towards me..I kept falling.
    So, I got scared. Got up and walked away.
    And the Virgo in me came out most strongly: Wind Currents. This particular cloud was being manipulated by wind currents, nothing more…just a pocket of air making the cloud do this strange thing.
    And I left it at that. But…when I got back home, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the Universe had sent me a message..I just wasn’t willing to accept what I saw, so I asked the Universe to send me another message/sign…one that I would MOST DEFINITELY not mistake for anything else.

    Morning of May 3rd…I wake up at 5am..bathroom..to the kitchen to make coffee. I wake my daughter up at 5:30am. We have breakfast and she goes into the bathroom to get herself ready for school. Five minutes after she goes in…she runs out screaming bloody murder….I’m thinking it’s a spider, as she has a fear of spiders…Me: “What the hell?” She’s trembling and only points into the bathroom..I’m thinking..It must be a Nuclearized Spider…20ft big…right?

    Instead, what I find is 5″ Scorpion in my bathroom sink. I almost fell through the floor. Granted, I live in Texas. Granted, there are Scorpions here. But in all the years I’ve lived here in TX, I’ve NEVER FOUND A SCORPION IN MY HOUSE. Moreorless, in my bathroom. I took a picture of it, because I couldn’t believe it myself.

    Then too, for the past two nights, I’ve had the strangest dreams. And this morning, I woke up at 2:22am. I looked that up on the Angel Numbers site and it was interesting.

    So…I have received some kind of messages, only I don’t know exactly what they mean..at least not yet.
    What has happened though in terms of Sentinel..is that there has been then attitude of indifference that has come over me…meaning, at this point, I don’t care what the outcome will be/is.
    And maybe…this was/is the lesson…to learn to detach yet still maintain a feeling of love/compassion…Does that even make sense?
    I don’t know…but that’s how I feel…detached, but compassionate and loving.

    Anyway…this is my update and if anything else develops, I will come back and share.

    And a bit thanks to all you Scorpions here on the board…believe it or not…I feel safer here with you guys than anyone else.
    Particularly in explaining whatever this is that is happening with me. I think you guys will “get” it.

    • I had similar messages and synchrobicities one to this day I still have trouble believing
      Definitely that was my lesson …love with non attachment which is a Buddhist philosophy

      • Elemis:

        Being a practicing Buddhist…I know this well and thought I was doing really well with this aspect. I have learned to release attachment to many things in my life and this has served me well.
        Which is why I am so taken aback with this particular situation…I’m not sure how to process it.
        Intuitively, I know this is what the situation tells me, but where I’m stymied is, how I was caught so off guard and fell back into attachment…
        The Universe is indeed a strange, wonderful thing and it’s Power is Awesome. LOL

        Thanks for sharing.

    • yes i definitely get the “get it” i am a female scorpio, dated a pisces for year. Went really well, ended very bad, he moved different states. We’ve been broken up for about month. I went through so much emotions and he never seemed to care or value the relationship as much as i did. All he did was pick and i always tried to improve. i kinda had to revaluate my life and figure things out. And then one day i was hanging with my friends and we texted once that day and we snapchatted a couple times, i then decided to just not talk to him for some reason, i just got the sense of not caring anymore. I still of course have an eager deep inside but it doesn’t over power me. i feel ready to let go. He did call me like 4 times i only answered once only bc he neeed me. I always have the door open for you if you need someone, i will keep my distance and remain aloof. It’s very true, when we freeze someone. That’s it. He kinda got mad at me for me being me and me being there for him i guess? idk pisces. He blocked me or whatever. I usually would freak out and try and get his attention. But i felt no care. I care for him. But we really do get to a limit and it’s like we don’t even mean to feel this way. It’s our way to protect ourself, literally, naturally. He’s toxic, it’s funny bc he really tried so hard to get my attention and i really didnt bother. I’ve seen in others posts. “I’ve done this before, but ive grew up. i don’t let much people into my life” That is also me. i’m surprised how unexpectedly it came. It’s a relief. I really do enjoy before a scorpio:)

  124. I’ve just been frozen out by my Scorpio friend just recently. At least I think so. It started on the beginning of our senior year. I knew him in past years but I never really talked to him. We became friends through a leadership class and we were always good friends to each other. I myself am a Aries with a Leo moon and a Libra rising. Anyways we started off great and it lasted like that until the second semester. By then, he knew everything about me. I could tell he trusted me and that I was dear friend to him as well. Yet I didn’t know a whole lot about him. So I kept on going into the relationship trying to pull some stuff out of him. He was silent the entire time. He then started ignoring my texts, communicated with me less and less, and soon started acting quite douchey. By the end of senior year, he stopped talking to me. I have never stopped being a good friend and will not stop. I know everyone has their secrets, but if he trusts me, he shouldn’t have to keep private about anything unless it’s absolutely necessary. And event though it was a quiet leaving, it felt heart-wrenching and terrible on my part. I really wish I had my friend back. Or I wish I could confront him about it without him hiding in his sheep or only giving small talk.

    • Hiya 🙂
      Not everyone is as comfortable as you seem to be with opening up. Many Scorpios in my experience aren’t and are very secretive. This shouldn’t necessarily be an indicator of how much they trust you. I’m not sure of the nature of your relationship but personally I don’t think you need to know everything about anyone to have a good relationship, it’s not about withholding secrets, it’s just some people need a private space. Personally I’ve a very open person but I would start feeling uncomfortable even if an intimate partner starting pushing or trying to pull information out of me.
      Just a different view and hope you can mend your friendship 🙂

  125. I am a Scorpio , I do cut people off and yes we do have a sense about people , its not so much a judging as it is a gut feeling , if I see someone I’ve never spoke to or met but I get a bad feeling an impression about them I will never speak to them I’ve been on this earth 42 years and I can honestly say time tested my gut is never wrong , the times I ignored was always the times I found myself in bad situations . the times I listened it saved me a lot of headaches so yes I always listen to my impression (my gut) first . Plus I recently went through amputation of a friendship and a family member , I was constantly berated by nonsense from two female friends as well as them trying to use me repeatedly , I stopped talking to them twice b4 it happened a few days the first time , almost a week the second time and they were very disloyal , I would stick my neck out for them stick up for them but when it came down to me I was told they weren’t getting involved they never had my back , so I cut them off three weeks ago , they kept trying to talk to me even asking me if I was mad , til it got to a point where I had to text them and tell them why I cut them off and that I never want to be bothered with them again , my sister as well after years of her abuse of alcohol and drugs I had to tell her I was done with her too she was a drunk who cares about no ones feelings but her own and I’m not that way I worry about everyone’s feelings , and unfortunately if u make me feel like I’m wasting my time or I dnt like you or you make me repeat myself over and over I will cut you off with no recourse , these days people do things to other people and feel they are not supposed to have any repercussions , and they walk blindly through life that way but when they are forced to deal with the repercuss of their actions they act like it is the other persons fault for what they brought on them selves , that is why Scorpios cut people off to avoid the conflict not because we are afraid but because we know the damage we will do if the nonsense continues and the destruction usually comes in verbal and emotional form and if that dnt work we will fuck you up , physically , that is what causes us to cut people off , for their sake not ours

  126. UPDATE:

    Two months to the day: I hear from HIM? He’s so nonchalant…sounds so happy-go-lucky….
    “Hi, how are you. I was absent awhile, but I’m back (on the social media site)…I moved back to Vegas and I just wanted to say, you are a dream and absolutely beautful, but since I’m no longer there it will have to stay a compliment…however, if I were still there, I’d would’ve taken you out every chance I got.”


    I can’t even process this. I don’t know what to do, what to say or how to even feel. Just when the pain was starting to subside…he SHOWS UP? And acts as if nothing happened?

    I AM AT A LOSS FOR WORDS. I can’t even think right now.

  127. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Can someone try to explain this to me?

    I haven’t even answered him back. I think I’ve just been sitting in front of my computer for the past 45 minutes slack jawed…I’m not even sure….It’s like I’ve been sucked into a wormhole and time no longer exists.

  128. Elsa…

    I awoke this morning to another email. But here’s the kicker:
    This person claims to be someone totally different…even though the physical description, birth dates and writing styles are EXTREMELY similar.
    In this instance, I don’t think a birth chart is going to be of any use, as obviously this person has another agenda.
    I’m going to have to ride this one out and just see where it leads as I truly believe that this is the only way that things will be revealed.

    I have read the horror stories of Scorpios and mind games and am starting to believe that this person is very crafty, cunning and devious….after I received the first message, I laid out three Tarot cards and the overall message was “false messages, deceit, trickery and cunning.”

    I believe indeed, that is one and the same person, but now I’m curious to see just how far he will go.

    I will come back as developments occur…OR not.

  129. I am wondering if there is a way to repair the damage done to cause a scorpio to shut down. My partner and I recently decided to have a break, more so on his part. Our relationship has been strained the past few months with an unusual downpour of life’s grievances causing myself unbelievable stress and unknowingly relying on him to much, and causing strain on him and our relationship. After some time apart I’ve seen how unfair I was to put so much pressure on him and in out relationship. I don’t know how to mend and explain this to him as he seems to be closing himself off to me, and I fear I cld have lost any chance I had to salvage and make amends. I’m wondering if there is a way to get through to my scorpio or once he has cut the tie is there no going back? Is there any time limit if so? Thanks for any thoughts xo

  130. I’m a Scorpio woman, deep feeling and want to be loved. If a person I love hurts me I can’t process words to express myself. I don’t feel safe. The last straw is I don’t want to talk to you ,I don’t want to see you for fear I may forgive you in my vulnerable state.I have to protect myself from further hurt.This is how I amputate. Not with words ,with action.

  131. Hi,
    I’m a Scorpio Sun, Merc, Venus, Mars. I’ve done the freeze out quite a few times with relationships/friendships. It helps me to just shut out the pain of their major betrayal. It’s like a “clean up” “sweep out the dirt”. There is, however, no going back at that point. If they apologize and are truly remorseful..I greatly appreciate that..however, their is no going back. My top priority is not to hurt THEM… it’s a coping skill. Although, if it does hurt them, that’s an added plus. I was just shut out by my Scorpio moon boyfriend. I apologized, took full responsibility for the heartache I caused him.. I hope he accepts the apology..but I do know it is over..and although I am also heartbroken..I have learned from it..

  132. Okay here’s an update:

    Last I was here, June 6th, 2015…I’ve been super busy at work and haven’t had the opportunity to share what I discovered:

    I posted on June 6th, that the Scorpio man resurfaced with an email, but had different details. I said that I would talk to this “new” Scorpio man and see what the deal was.
    Turns out, It is NOT THE SAME SCORPIO man…but someone completely different after all. The email that was sent to me, in it’s wording, was so dead spot-on in terms of how the situation unfolded, that it made me think it was him.

    That the 1st Scorpio male would have been here in my town working and from Vegas was okay, but to have this 2nd Scorpio male be from my town and move to Vegas is something odd….that this 2nd Scorpio male would send me an email that appeared to be an explanation of him moving back to Vegas, etc…causing me to think it was the 1st Scorpio male was truly coincidental and I don’t believe in coincidences…lol

    There has been over 90 days of no contact with the 1st Scorpio male and I’ve been trying to come to some type of acceptance over what happened (or didn’t)..which has been/is good for me. Yet, whenever I feel that I’m moving forward, the Universe does something that will bring him back into the forefront…like this 2nd guy showing up with the email. I am beginning to conclude that the Universe does not want me to forget. There are too many synchronistic events happening that are utterly, totally and completely SO out-of-the-ordinary, that it is difficult not to take notice and pay very close, very strict attention to them.

    I deleted my profile from the website where I met the 1st Scorpio male and where the 2nd Scorpio male saw me…just trying to minimize whatever is going on, because surely, I do not understand what is happening.
    I am slowly healing and making progress, but ever so often, the Universe will send some kind of sign that knocks me back a few feet and I must start all over again.

    This is INDEED, still one of the STRANGEST experiences I’ve ever had in my life.

    I finally broke down and got two different Tarot readings and they have confirmed what my own readings have been saying: It is NOT OVER between us. The last reader, who is arguably, one of the best I’ve run across, gave me some final words on my reading:
    “Prepare yourself because he will return…quite suddenly, unexpectedly and with a force that will knock you down.”
    This is something I’ve felt deep down all along.

    Now, I’ve read that once you’ve cut-off by a Scorpio, it’s the end-all-to-be-all..But yea…don’t know how I know that he’ll return…I just do. It’s something I feel in every fiber of my being.

  133. Hello All

    I am a scorpio november 8th

    About 5 years ago I did a major amputation on my whole circle of friends. I like to call it “spring cleaning”. I came to a realization that certain people were jealous, unsupportive, dead weight or it seemed like they were only hanging around me to benefit, or to learn secrets about me to spill them to others to hurt me in the long run. It took me about 5 months to go through with the action. I do admit that I feel better and since the negetive people have been removed, great things have happened in my life. The only thing that I will admit to is that I am still in pain. I have no friends. No one to go dancing with, or even go to the beach and scope out the hotties playing basketball. No fun, just work. I mean I go on dates with guys but my heart longs for that female/female connection. Im a girl girl to the max so its really hard not having a female companion to talk and be silly with.

    Ive blocked people, deleted peoples numbers, ignored emails of reconciliation. Most poeple do not miss me until Im dead and gone…and i have emails with then trying to crawl back into my life to prove it.. I read them and laugh and go about my life…. but secretly my heart hurts. It seems like I miss the friends who hurt me the most. Its like the friends I looked up to were the ones who did me in the most…and I just can not get over that. I was loyal I was true and in the end I still feel as though in a way i have lost.

  134. I have a scorpio girl , she says she does not love me yet she acts differently.

    Recently she been communicating to me less emotionally and acting cold is this normal or does this mean she lost interest?

    She also says if you like me when will you start to worry about me, that’s after she told me she does not love me.

    I don’t understand.

  135. Scorpions help please …My scorpion guy broke up with me since may and since then I ve been begging and pleading him to resolve issues with me but he refuse…just few days he told me that there is no love to fight for and he never loved me and I wnt force him to be in a relationship with me…please what should I do… He also told me that there is no hope of me expecting that things will work out.. The last time I called him he warned me not to call again that am barred from calling him and texting him and also I should leave him alone.

  136. Onyi, I am sorry to have to tell you, but when a Scorpio/Plutonian says it is over, that is what they mean. It is better that you move on and find someone else.

    And you definitely do not want to push him too far. Time to move on to greener pastures.

  137. Just found out, the hard way, that a S male I know likes me. I say the hard way because he saw me kiss (a peck, but on the lips) a longtime family friend and now he’s giving me the deep freeze. I’m hoping he comes to realize that it wasn’t done to get him jealous and gets past it.

  138. Dear Ladies I hope you can help me!
    I’m sagittarius rising sign taurus my scorpio woman abandoned me I think, because she blocked me from whatsapp,facebook and the others!
    the reason she forgot my birthday. I’ve waited all day and changed my status at whatsapp about 22.30 at night to remind her it’s my birthday to day.A few minutes later she sent me 5 messages to congratulate it,of course I was disappointed and complained a bit and told her she broke my heart couple of times!
    this is my last message I sent her because she blocked me I saw it the other day
    ”you broke my heart but anyway I always want for you the best because I love you…”
    it’s been 14 days I’m still blocked and I can’t reach her to ask what’s wrong!
    anyone can give me advise what to do?

  139. I’m a scorpio and a young lady and I do amputate many relationships. The only people I don’t amputate are my family because to me, family is the most important thing. I don’t know why I do it but I think it’s a way of coping. I had a friend who didn’t treat me very well and we were constantly fighting, so I completely shut her out. Without warning. I changed my phone number, I blocked her on social media accounts, and that was our final year of school, so I didn’t havr to worry about seeing her again to explain myself. I did actually see her at the supermarket one time but I didn’t say hello and she gave me the evil eyes. I know I sound like a cruel and cold person but when I choose to be done with someone, there is no changing my mind. I have no desire to work through it. A person only gets one chance with me and they often can’t redeem themselves. I can forgive but I sure as hell don’t forget. That’s why to the people posting here whether or not their scorpios who froze them out will talk to them again, the answer is probably not…It will take a lot to convince a scorpio otherwise. I only cut out one friend. The others were all romantic partners.. And I’ve frozen out A LOT of romantic partners. A LOT.
    For instance, One boy I really liked( sooo much) was from Spain(foreign exchange student) and we had been together for maybe 6 months. Anyway he told me he loved me and not long after that he had to go back to Spain. Then I get a call from him and he tells me that he’s met up with his old french girlfriend. Said that he was “confused about his feelings”. I ended that call abruptly and never talked to him again. Since then I’ve recieved a few calls and emails from him asking if he upset me and wanting to know if we could talk about it but he doesn’t understand that the damage is done. I want nothing to do with him anymore. And I don’t intend on ever forgiving him. What makes his spanish a** think he can tell me he loves me and then take it back only alittle while later? You don’t say something like that and then take it back. Anyone who says something like that without actually meaning it is a fool and I don’t have the paitience for fools. And let me tell you what,there are a lot of fools. And I’m not about to settle for one.

  140. Being a scorpio sun, my friendships are intense and I take them very seriously. My biggest aggravation is when people do not appreciate me. Usually my friends don’t care about me as much as I care about them and I get hurt. I have a few friends who like to go on and on about how great their other friends are right in front of my face. One of my friends is BFFs with a girl who made it clear to her that she doesn’t really like me. When I’m with my friends, I make an effort to make them feel very important and then I feel unappreciated when they don’t do the same in return. It may seem random and quick when I cut off friends, but truthfully it takes A LOT of built of resentment for me to finally explode. Scorpios have no limits and they keep pushing through when friends disappoint them. But it’s only a matter of time before I explode and at that point I am too far gone to slowly distance myself, I just completely disappear.

  141. I have had to freeze friends out to protect my heart. I have a scorpio stelium. In the last year I froze a friend of 28 years out. She used to lean on me with all her problems. Her daughter has been a drug addict for 20 years. I have always been there to lift her up ,to wipe her tears. She told me I was the only friend she could share her problems with. Then last spring I showed some weakness. Showed her some of my pain I have had through life. Her birthday was in July and what did I see? Pics on facebook of her birthday party she was having that I was not invited to. Since I have seen her a couple of times,been polite, but I will never be there for her again.

  142. I’m an Aquarius have a strong attraction to Scorpios, growing up with a Scorpio mother (abusive) and older brother (distant). I always felt misunderstood and abandoned by both when I needed them most. In my adult life I seem to form quick, immediate bonds with Scorpios of both genders, but as each bond is broken I distrust them more and more. With the males I’ve noticed a pattern of instant attraction/connection, and a bit of a courtship dance that culminates in them making the first physical move. But as soon as I show any deeper interest they retreat or downplay what I thought was a very real connection, to the point that I lash out and walk away. I’ve read Aqua and Scorp square and our friction is natural, and intended to teach us both lessons. However, I’m frustrated at my inability to understand the lesson, much less communicate in a truly fulfilling way with people I genuinely admire. Scorpios are captivating to say the least. But I wholeheartedly distrust them with my feelings. What am I missing?

    • Scorpio men are that way, period, regardless of you sign, although a squared sign is always a little more of a challenge. You need to play it very, very cool with them until they make their intentions very clear. Very sorry you had bad experiences. We (I’m one) are not saints, but when we’re good, we’re very, very good and…you know the rest.

  143. As a Scorpio, I’m going to tell you how it is. We give more energy in a relationship than any other sign. However, we don’t receive even a quarter of that energy back from others. We give intense thought, loyalty, inspiration and most of all love. We want to see other people happy. We thrive on it. We’ll do anything to make you happy. And to have your love. However, when we are double crossed or feel someone doesn’t care or isn’t trying or giving any energy at all, stung. Whoever is on the receiving end of the sting, is now as good as dead. Seriously. I’ve had best friends for 20 years and cut them off and never looked back. I was in love with someone for about 10 years and was treated like shit A LOT but my love for them was too strong. Eventually, out of the blue, I had enough, cut them off and have never looked back as well. That person who hardly cared sent messages to people I wasn’t even friends with trying to find me, doing everything they could. Eventually, after a YEAR of trying, they got a hold of a family member of mine (I never responded nor did the family member) and they pleaded to know what happened. This was coming from someone who only cared about 15% of the entire relationship now all of a sudden 120%. It truly makes people realize what they’ve done when a Scorpio stings. We don’t like being played, being vulnerable, treated like shit. Even if I did put up with it for years, we love so hard that sometimes, as hypocritical as it seems, we look past the bad. Also, I was extremely young and naive at the time. A Scorpio knows when it’s time to sting. We may wait it out for days, months, years but that’s what makes our sting so unexpected and painful. We greet you with a smile and a handshake then sting you. Just don’t cross us is my point. Also. we are also extremelyyy private (self preservation) which is truly a blessing in my eyes but I can see the cons, as with everything. We never give ourselves away 100%. You will never know a Scorpio fully, ever. We may trust you 100% (RARE, if ever!) and tell you “everything” but we’re still hiding a lot for our own sanity. Also, we may agree with you & say one thing but be thinking the complete opposite. We love to share our thoughts however we hate to share our thoughts, if that makes sense. I’d say a lot of Scorpios are loners. We want 2 great friends versus 1,000 “ok” friends and will sting everyone around us and be alone in life rather than treated like shit. Maybe when we’re younger and going through puberty, etc. and just want to be accepted (I did) we’ll put up with shit, but as I’ve grown older, I don’t have time for games anymore. Another big thing: never, ever lie to a Scorpio!! This is how you will get stung! We are human lie detectors. I genuinely mean this. We KNOW when someone is lying. Even the best liar. The best liar being a Scorpio. We’re better at our own game than you are. It’s literally a feeling that comes over us. I can instantly tell if somebody is lying and have called multiple people out on it and they’ve admitted to it. We are also very blunt. We will tell you like it is. We don’t sugarcoat shit. We expect the same in return as well. I’ve written a novel so I’m going to end this here. I hope this helps some of you. Just trying to give insight into a Scorpio’s mind. Research Scorpio’s before you get stung!!

    • Another example really quick: I just stung a “friend” of 5 years yesterday. She had it coming. My stinger was filling with poison for sometime, if you will. She would always complain about how nobody is there for her (when I put 200% into the friendship) however she was the one that was never there for anybody. Yesterday I told her an old friend of mine whom I lost contact with over the years (didn’t sting them, just happens) committed suicide. Her response was literally “that sucks” and that’s literally all it took. Two words, stung. Give us energy back. That’s a huge reason we sting is when we care and you don’t.

  144. I’m not a Scorpio but I am an eighth house sun so I understand it. I’ve frozen a few people out of my life that I was once very close to. The reason was exactly that … they sucked the life out of me. I didn’t go into explanations with them because they weren’t willing to look at themselves so it would have been a wasted effort on my part. How do I feel? Mostly sad about it, but sad that the relationship between them and me was so unbalanced in the first place.

  145. Well. even though I’m Scorpio, with a fww prominent position in that sign also, I’m pretty much easy going and not too vindicative(strong Sagittarius, also :)). But I have cut off some of the toxic people from my environment, and it was because they were REALLY out of line. I mean, you have to be extremely insensitive and mean in order for me to do that, because I’m loyal to the people in my inner circle. And after that, stays nothing. No emotions, no love, no hate, just indifference for the cut-off one. That is Scorpionic and really hurtful for the other side, but what can I do? Even my patience and understanding has its limits…

  146. Anybody who has ever been important to me has usually had a planet in Scorpio bc it’s in my 4th house. They feel like family and I get bonded very quickly. But these days, I have to be choosy of the Scorpio company I keep. Saturn in Scorpio taught me this. I understand the need for space and long periods of silence because I need that too but I will never understand the want for prolonged mind games. Blowing hot and cold all the time.?

    In fact, I’m about to amputate a couple of Scorpios who popped up in my life few months ago after years of a “freeze-out” session. My heart went cold towards them in that period of time but after a few weeks and genuine interest on their part, it slowly thawed out and I was cordial and even tried to rekindle the friendship. It was short-lived and even though I know better, I keep holding onto what was. ? I’m going to give it a couple of weeks and let all the emotion of these stormy skies pass a little. Because if I burn those bridges, it’s really over and I have to be 1000% sure I’m not gonna try to jump back into those waters and swim back… Because, despite doing this, I care for both of these confounding people deeply.

    • Saturn in Scorpio taught me this. I understand the need for space and long periods of silence because I need that too but I will never understand the want for prolonged mind games. Blowing hot and cold all the time.?

      I am natal Scorpio, progressed Sun in Capricorn. I say, and not without some relief, that I “used” to be a Scorpio. Got involved with a guy who’s now progressed Sun Scorpio with natal Saturn in Scorpio (progressed still there, too.) Your statement, above, sums him up. Having already gone through all that Scorpio sturm und drang, I understand it, but still don’t appreciate it. Maybe this is Karma paying me back for having been a Scorpio in my “earlier” life! Don’t know what your natal Sun sign is, but my advice is to just keep leading by example. Scorpio people (eventually) know when they’ve been wrong, and they will appreciate you giving them enough space to repair the damage.

      • You’re certainly a very enlightened Scorpio, lolabelle. ? I appreciate earth signs so very much, especially Capricorn. I never have to question the loyalty of a Capricorn friend nor their ability to shoot straight from the hip. I have natal sun in Cancer but it sits in my 11th house which expresses more like a detached Aquarius. I need my family but I also need lots of space and honor my friends and family’s needs for that as well. But I don’t like drama and won’t tolerate it for long. Caps understand that too. ?

  147. hi ,you can call me cat,ive been with my scorpio princess for three years I love her so much,,but now she don’t even return my calls are texts..im a handsome pieces male in my early fiftys ,and she is beautiful scorpio in her early 40s we had an amazsing first two years we would laugh and cry together,we where unsapateable..our thrird year ws wy different we spend more and more time apart mmand now she don’t talk to me,t all ..ithink because she didn’t answer me I begegan thinking she was talkiug to others,and I offen acused her of che,now when I call her she don’t answer and don’t talk to me ,,its hard because we live 75 miles aprt and don’t see eachother what can I do .to win her love once again,i now understand her ways,,i read somewhere that once a scopio loves you shell love you for ever..deep down in side I know she loves me,,were both in to tattoos,and I have her name twice ,and see has my name seven times all over her body,,pls help,,our do you think i really blew it didn’t i.called her all kinds of names took back gifts ,just about anything I thougth that would hurt her..now im the one hurting..whaqt do you think I should do..plz help,,the catt

  148. I have an 8th house Sun and Moon and Venus/Pluto. I do this. I have completely shut out every ex I’ve ever had plus a couple of so called friends- they are literally dead to me: obviously they are still alive and walking around in this earth, but my feelings are completely shut off to the point that they might as well be dead, not breathing. I could give not one shit about them. I would not give them one ounce of my energy again for anything unless they gave me 10 times what they ask from me, and then immediately after, it would go right back to them not existing. I agree it is an act of self preservation: these people have bludgeoned all traces of trust I had in them. They have burned me, repeatedly hurt me (i give people multiple chances), they have disrespected me. I have this current issue with an ex and it gets quite complicated when a child is involved, because there are people like current SO’s who for whatever God forsaken reason think you should want to know all about their life for the sake of the children as if I give a rat’s ass what they do together. No. All I care is that my child is safe. I don’t wish to be involved in whatever shenanigans they do together. …she thinks I should be more involved with them as co parents..it bothers her that I don’t ask her about their “adventures” with my child. She says that I should ask HER about their adventures they do while I’m not present so we can “co parent”. As if I don’t know already what kind of life she has. I have already lived it. I do take great interest in whatever my child tells me about his life outside of me. I do ask him and I never had mouth any of them but I could not give a shit less what they say they do. And ah…this bugs her greatly. Do I care? Nope; Dead. To. Me.

  149. “Heather on November 24, 2007 at 9:29 am said:
    I have Venus in Scorpio and a lot of Virgo, so I like to serve and I have can handle a lot of dark stuff. But, it does get draining and I have had to let a few people go because I would hold all of their crap and they would leave me hanging with it. … in self-preservation mode, I have to reserve some energy for me and they get cut off.”

    I’m a lot like Heather. I have an 8th House Libra Sun with Virgo Ceres sextiling Cancer Vesta. I am a classic fixer-upper/doormat in relationships! After a while, I wonder why I feel so used and unappreciated after all my unsolicited hard rescue work! Don’t these people see the letter “S” emblazoned on my chest? lol I terminated my marriage and several friendships long past their expiration dates as it began to impact my health. I’ve learned to set up guilt-free, appropriate relational boundaries. And, most importantly, offer my assistance ONLY when asked!

  150. This one made me think of my Grandmother (Cancer Sun, Moon Virgo)and her Scorpio Sun, Sagittarius Moon, Son. There was so much hurt and pain between the two of them for years. He would distance himself and his family for a year or so and then come back. (Probably his Sagittarius Moon). Eventually they hurt each other enough that my Grandmother wrote him out of the will. After that he wrote the entire extended family off for good. How sad that my Cancer Grandmother couldn’t see how much she hurt her Scorpio Son, when she treated his children different than the rest of her grandchildren. So now we all carry their pain years after they both have died. So sad.
    I like Scorpio’s. I don’t have a lot of 8th H, but I do have planets in Scorpio , so I usually know when to stop provoking the Scorpion/ Eagle.

  151. “Joly63 on April 8, 2016 at 1:20 pm said:
    I’m not a Scorpio but I am an eighth house sun so I understand it. I’ve frozen a few people out of my life that I was once very close to. The reason was exactly that … they sucked the life out of me. I didn’t go into explanations with them because they weren’t willing to look at themselves so it would have been a wasted effort on my part. How do I feel? Mostly sad about it, but sad that the relationship between them and me was so unbalanced in the first place.”

    AMEN! You are preaching to the choir, Joly63! I have an 8th House Libra Sun and I was the only who petitioned for a divorce which came as a complete “shock” to my ex. I had to take the same steps with abruptly ending a few energy-sucking friendships – my Pisces Moon was drowning in their pain!

  152. Hi Elsa…great article and a fine explanation which clears up an action I, as a Scorpio music teacher/mentor, have performed and always felt bad about. The ones who need spoon feeding always left me drained to the point I wouldn’t/couldn’t pick up my guitar sometimes all evening after one of their ‘lessons’. It’s a relief to know that it’s self preservation and even though I mo longer ‘teach’…I casually mentor; but only seekers who tend to be motivated and in turn motivate me. Thanks again.. …
    pax et lux

    Bobby Stahr

  153. I’ve dated a Scorpio (another one) who currently has Uranus transiting opposite his Venus. Since this transit has begun he has taken to amputating me and then coming back. Dumping me and then coming back. Over and over and over again. And he’s not doing it for self preservation. I made the mistake of trusting him when I told him I have a serious fear of abandonment and he has continually used it to manipulate and own me. It’s gotten so bad that I made very clear to him the last time he did this to me that if he ever pulled this crap on me again, I would do something so incredibly damaging to his life and his reputation to all who know him that he better be serious and stick this time. And as predicted, off he ran. All silence. For weeks and just before my birthday (he likes to do it right before my birthday) but I don’t make idle threats. I have contacted him and he now knows that I fully intend to follow through with my threat. He’s mulling it over. Either way, I could give two shi** that he’s a Scorpio. I’m an 8th house Leo Sun and Mercury and Virgo Venus. No one f***s with me any more and gets off Scott free. He’s terrified and has told me as much. He should be. Because my birthday is a week away, and his destruction is the gift I give to myself. …I don’t take kindly to manipulation.

    • I also have Pluto transiting my first house and Pluto in Libra, right on top of his Venus. Scorpios don’t scare me and they shouldn’t constantly be spoken of in such a way as to give their sign more power or severity than any other. His Scorpio games worked on me for awhile, but only because I chose to see the best in yet another Scorpio POS (sorry to those of you that are not that way). It’s his loss, not mine. I learned what Scorpio stuff he was made of and I’m all the better for it… So that I can knowingly escape him and his manipulations and he can be all alone in his little Scorpio cavern, quivering, too afraid to come out into the light. He’ll be the one who suffers in the end. He can amputate all he wants, but no one can be as destructive as a lion ready to rip you apart. I don’t accept amputation. It’s cruel and emotionally abusive. There’s another word for amputation and it’s “abandonment”. There is no power in abandonment. Only cowardice. And unlike the scorpio, the lion doesn’t hide. I’m in plain view and make no secret about my intention to go for the jugular. Which, as he himself said, “makes him sick with worry and terrifies him beyond belief”. …as it should. The thought of it brings me nothing but pleasure.

  154. Wow…never seen so much open admittance of vengeful petty motives. If I recall, scorpio is the sign of transformation. The totem animal changes based on how evolved the scorpio is on their path. The mighty phoenix does not hold grudges or freeze people out. They transcend the situation n learn where the problem behavior needs adjustment…hence the deep thinking sharp mind. Problem solvers with penetrating solution. These blog answers are an archive of all the ways scorpio fail their karmic tests. The ego needs to die before the phoenix can take fought into the ether

  155. My youngest son has a lot of Scorpio. He has Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter in Scorpio. When he cares about someone or loves them he does it to the depth of his soul. It is 100%. He feels more deeply than any other person I’ve ever met. The thing I’ve noticed about him is if someone comes to him honestly and “with their heart in their hands” he will treat that person as if they were the most precious thing in the world. When he connects he connects with his mind, heart, and soul.
    However, I have seen him walk away from people and break off all communication when they hurt him deeply. I have known many Scorpios in my life and I think my son pretty much sums up my experiences with other Scorpios. They are some of the most emotionally honest people I’ve ever met. When you are loved by a Scorpio you are loved completely and deeply.

  156. Wow, this was so long ago. I am in the same boat with a Sun Gemini/Moon Pisces. I am a Sun Pisces/Moon Scorpio. I have completely cut her out of my life because she was extremely selfish and would only call or hang out when she was depressed. It sucked the life out of me, but I understood. The last straw was when she kept telling me to “try this guy” or “try this other one” all guys she had slept with. I am not like that. She introduced me to this gentleman whom I fell in love with. Fast forward 10 months and he tells me that they had sex years before he met me. Friends don’t do that to friends and I completely cut her right out, yet she still doesn’t know why, but she is dead to me.

  157. i have this scorpio friend. we were very close. spoke daily on the phone and texts. we got along extremely well. then one day she started distancing herself slowly..more and more. fast forward a few months later:if I don’t reach out, I don’t hear from her. she never calls. hasn’t for months. it’s not like we got in an argument, or I upset her. it’s like one day her love (friendship love) for me was gone

  158. Complicated story, am a pisces man, was in a relationship with a scorpio woman, we were both young..almost certainly the most intense relationship of my life, we both thought of each other as ‘soulmates’ after 3 years I was forced to live some distance away, we say each other every weekend, the connection didn’t fade. She started a new job, had some guy hitting on her, I didn’t know..guess it was new, exciting. Went with it, kissed him, full of remorse, upset, apologies…loved me. Was so confused, thought she was young, maybe had to just let her go, make up her mind. Told me we would be back together when we could be, that she would love me forever. I went away..dealt with the knowledge she was with someone else as best I could, tried to hold back my emotions, told myself not to throw blame around, create pain. Met up months later for our ‘anniversary’ so painful, same thing, we’d be together when it ‘was right’…last thing I saw was her crying and saying she loved me through a train window…never saw her again. Got a phone call, couple of months later, the ‘I love you’s’ continued throughout this time, cold as ice, its over…no emotion, no care, finished. Wouldn’t even see me when I went to see her in person. Felt so unbelievably cruel. Got the impression I was viewed as ‘needy’ by this stage, when I’d taken all the pain of thinking of her with someone else on my own back.

    Got on with life for a few years, and no-one entered my world who moved me like that again. Had a few relationships, but couldn’t invest or commit. Went to another country, ten years, travelled coast to coast, met a lot of people, found friends along the way, one person who I loved, but very differently, wanted to lookafter them because they were hurting, never forgot the scorpio girl…always told me she would ‘die for me’…so hard to forget. Now I’m back. Part of me wants to write and say, this is the way its always been for me, I always hoped I would see you again. Part of me still hurts from the freeze…I don’t think I could ever have done that myself..but I understand that everyone reacts differently, she froze me because otherwise she wouldn’t have been able to go on. Part of me doesn’t write for ‘fear’ of saying the wrong thing, and taking the double hurt of another freeze. Part of me wants to say, this is what you did..thinking I’ll probably engage her anger/annoyance – but maybe its closure and I can hit the road again, knowing its destroyed beyond repair. I’ve never felt such horrible conflicting emotions my whole life, I hate conflict, I try and care for everyone, I never looked back at anyone I left behind ever before..impossibly hard. Suggestions ?

    • yes this exactly my story. i’m telling you close enough. We were made for each other. You know exactly what i’m talking about. I’m a scorpio female and he was a pisces. Together for over a year. He moved to a different state bc he had to and i also started a very new job. We talked from time to time. We weren’t sure what we wanted but we always had this crazy deep bond. i am in the middle of the break up still, it’s only been a month. I actually seemed to freeze him out, out of no where. He plays a lot of games and i fall for him all the time. I finally accepted the break up and noticed i can’t control what has changed. He lives far away. He won’t be back for a while or ever. It was hard to let go but i couldn’t string on the pain and keep hoping. i do love him but i think we need to figure out selfs out. We were so head over heels for the relationship we lost ourself. I believe our bond is always ganna be there and i do hope one day we are better for one another.

  159. Sad story but you are so so right Elsa. Amputation is always an act of self-preservation for Scorps. It’s a ‘defensive strike’. Thanks for putting it in the right prospective.

  160. lol instead of complaining and analyzing your Scorpio Moon, maybe you should analyze yourself and look at what you’ve done to hurt your friend so much…as a Scorpio Moon myself, I can say that we are extremely loyal and great friends and would not cut someone out of our lives unless they’re severely hurt and taken advantage of us over and over and over again…

    to say that you have no sympathy, clearly states that your friend made the right decision

  161. You didnt have a friendship at that point. That was a long series of stings. Think back to when your friendship first started. It was completely different right? What happened between then and the first sting.

  162. I know Scorpio/8th house can amputate to get even, but ever thought that sometimes, Scorpio amputation may have to do with transformation?

    When a Scorpio is in the process of transforming or after it has transformed, they shun the energy that used to be incorporated into their former being. (Scorpios/8th housers literally merge energy with others) To allow themselves to experience the energy again, would be like killing the person they are becoming or have become…. it hurts too much to go back, so they person becomes dead to them, unable to ever get back in. Impossible because Scorpio a new person. Just a thought.

  163. So I then bumped into your blog, coz I recently got a subtle tension with an Aunt who happens to be Scorpio-Libra Cusp. I hate to say this, but she’s pretty much a devolved scorpio type. Grumpy, greedy and secretive. I have always believed that when people get old, they become wiser and evolved, but not this Scorpio aunt. She has been worse than ever. Even if she won’t speak, you would feel her vibe, and to be honest I get really irritated by it. I couldn’t really blame her. Basically the family she came from was dysfunctional to begin with. She and that Pisces Aunt are just toxic. One day, I am hoping I could get rid of them. Just nasty draining toxicity. Manipulative and bully.

    And another one, two years ago, I froze out a scorpio woman coz she dysfunctional as well. She was a very jealous and self-important. She just wants to compete with friends and wAnts to ace out on them. She wanted everyone to focus on her. If she doesn’t get what she wants from a certain person, she decimates the person through manipulation and falsities such as baseless rumors. And its weird coz she’s just the most ruthless and unsympathetic scorpio I’ve ever met. I got fed up with her shit and so I cur her off. She still lurks around me and even attempted to lace around my circle. But just no. Lol I killed her in my life just like that.

    Then there’s this very special Scorpio friend I had. He was really nice to me. He’s been there with me throughout, but I’ve been doing things that kind of really tore his trust and couldnt blame him, I mean was too playful and didnt realize my mischievousness already hurt him. It was already too late but I understand him and so I let him go.

    By the way I am a plutonian in scorpio.

  164. Funny article. You said you were taxing on him? Wow! Someone beat the Scorpio at their own game? Good job Elsa! If you didn’t have the upper hand… and come in with that uppercut. That Scorpio would of sized you up in no time… I never met a Scorpio that didn’t try and manipulate their prey in some sort of manner.

  165. Elsa, I’m a pisces and have been frozen out by a Scorpio man. He is my soulmate. When we kissed for the first time it rocked my.world and I cried that someone could make me feel to secure. We remained friends and then he came to see me in April and after that it went horribly wrong. He said he was busy and I got mad and then eventually he cut me off. I miss him everyday. I truly believe we are meant to be. Will he wake up and realise that I was the one that would have loved him the way he needs?

    • I wish you the best of luck. Ive been frozen out by my ex scorpio for nothing. It was his own lies. that burnt him. His revenge for what ever good it did for him hurt my badly. Im a Leo woman that doesn’t play games. He was my best friend at least i thought he was until i found out his truth. Drugs, alcohol, pimping, communication seller it all was what he is. Im still trying to figure out wtf happened. I let go. I had to. The best kisser and liar I’ve ever meant in my life. Just remember your own worth.

      • I’m sorry this happened to both of you! Shelly, coming from a Scorpio woman here, who’s been with a man who was a drug addict, PLEASE try to forget the good memories and stay away from this man. It isn’t worth it. I’ve had my ex drug addict completely take me down with him because of good memories. One almost lead to my arrest just because I was living with him while we was doing these illegal things and I had no idea of this. Mourn the loss – but I hope you let this one go!

  166. Finally, someone gets it!I am so happy to see I am not the only one.
    Unfortuately, I have had to cut others from my life. I didn’t really want to because it was a drama. To me, it was a survival instinct, they were killing me with their unspoken abusive feelings towards me. They would say one thing on the surface and feel another thing subconsciously and I was experiencing their negativity. You can’t make people be self aware or compassionate, so I had to remove myself from their orbit…or cut them off, whatever…for my own mental, physical and emotional health.

  167. i guess the only scorpios i know have fire energy in them mostly,
    so they dont like negativity and when they come across too much of that, they will cut off. Pisces usually is their trine and pisces gives good illusion and love/exalted in venus and hates negativity too. If ever their sextile earth signs get together with water,they gotta have water too, or too much negativity is painful. and to be too controlling. controlling is a no-no. from what i have noticed. I have seen them cut off family if too much negativity and controlling behaviour.

  168. I’m too am a Scorpio. I can say that Scorpios usually doesn’t cheat and that’s big to us in relationships. We rather cut ties then to cheat and if we do cheat you’ll know why whether you say or not but rarely. Even slight thought we catch in ya behavior that may lead to you cheating tho is enough for us to go cold on you. You can call it jealous or controlling but it is what is. We aren’t cruel, shut off, jealous or anything they say in a negative manner. We in fact have positive feedback for the negative traits they deem us to have. If we are jealous — relationship wise then when we display it though some may take it as insecure it’s just our way of saying “Hey I don’t want to lose you”. Even tho some may never view it that way. I believe we are hopeless romantics, so when we are wronged in a relationship of any sort it makes us cold towards you or the doer.

  169. There were two times where I was cut out by a Scorpio (both were Scorpios) and I deserved it! Just being blunt (1st house stellium). I don’t know anyone who is that clean and hasn’t been a little dirty, if you want to find someone with armpits as clean as Clorox, go ahead! Some people are sociopaths and deserve to be cut out, but there are times where the Scorpio is just being overly proud. It happens, but I do see that the other half of the time Scorpios are right in their assessment of others! 🙂

  170. I’m a Capricorn female, Aquarius Moon, Taurus Rising. I generally keeps people at arm’s length and it takes a very long time for me to open up to others. My circle is very tiny.

    My heart had been hurt by a Libra man and I didn’t date anyone else for nearly a year. I poured myself into my work, family, and friends, and stayed away from men.

    Then this handsome Scorpio man pursued me – HARD – despite my walls. He was kind, sweet, patient, well-traveled, and romantic. Our connection was really strong from the beginning. He listened to everything I had to say for hours. He was such a gentleman and never let me lift a finger. His kisses were the best I ever had. He swept me off my feet on our first date.

    As soon as I began to fall for him, after about three weeks of texting all day, calling every day, and seeing each other twice weekly, he began to distance himself and pull away. I asked him if he needed space and before I could finish my sentence, he immediately told me he did not need any space. Yet he seemed emotionally unavailable.

    He had a million questions for me – and wanted to know about all about my life, but hardly responded to my questions about him and his life. He either had one word answers or would change the subject. The worst part is when he would be silent in response.

    Before the three week mark, he would text me everyday to say good morning and good night. He would text me first and respond to my texts immediately throughout the day. He seemed so invested in finding out whatever problem I had and helping me come up with a solution. But after the three weeks passed it became hours before he would respond to my texts. And I started to notice that I was often the one texting him first.

    At first I had to plan when we would see each other because he would not set up any dates after the first one, but he always readily agreed to what I planned. As he began to pull away, I would ask him if he still wanted to keep seeing me and was interested and he would always say yes. But in my heart, I felt differently due to his distancing. He would always deny that he’s being distant. He would say he was tired or he was busy or that he fell asleep before he could text me back.

    I felt like I was doing all the work and he wasn’t trying to see me.

    I could feel that his interest had completely diminished. We had not seen each other for 10 days and he was not doing anything to try to see me…no matter how I tried, he never had time or he wouldn’t respond to whether a date or time worked for him. When we finally met up after 10 days, he did not try to do be physically affectionate and seemed like his mind was elsewhere.

    I asked him if he wanted to break up and he said no. I asked him if he could be gentle with my heart and he said that that would make him responsible. This really unsettled me.

    It felt like he did not want me anymore, but he also didn’t want to let me go. I asked if we should take a break and he could come back when he was more interested. He said no, and that no one knows the future. That was so vague and cryptic and he wouldn’t explain further, so I just wanted to go home.

    I had a sneaking suspicion that he had been seeing someone else. On the last day I saw him, he was texting a woman back and forth right in front of me and when I asked, he told me she was a client. I didn’t believe it because she sent him a pretty picture of her face. It made no sense that a business client would do that. I thought about all the other things that made no sense.

    He did not want me to see his place. He did not introduce me to any of his friends. Whenever I would discuss where the relationship was going, he would change the subject and tell me to look at his actions. Well at that point, he was only texting me to say good morning and good night. He wasn’t sharing anything about his day or his life like I was. But he texted me faithfully every morning and every night.

    I called and told him that I wanted to spend more time with him… going hiking, or to the beach, or hanging out. Something to bring our bond back to where we were. He told me he understood, but he didn’t do anything differently… just texting me to say good morning and good night. But this time, I was only the one texting him first and he would take hours to respond.

    After another week of this, I sent him a text message indicating that I thought he was seeing someone else…specifically that “client,” and I wished he could be honest with me.

    I never heard from him again.

    I called and texted him a couple of times and he never responded.

    It’s been 8 weeks and I’m angry with myself for falling for someone and being so open with someone who refused to be open with me in the same way. Even though we never slept together, I feel so stupid and used. All the signs were there and I should have broken up with him.

    I didn’t want to lose such a handsome man without giving him a chance to explain himself.

    I usually keep walls around my heart and I can’t believe this has happened. I can’t believe someone could be so cruel to pursue someone so relentlessly and then drop them without a second thought. I don’t understand why he couldn’t just tell me he didn’t want to be with me or break up with me in a normal way. I feel like I gave him plenty of opportunities to open up.

    I’m still not even sure what happened here. Normally, I would walk away without a second thought. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before in my entire life. I’m so angry with him at times that I could scratch his eyes out. At other times I try to see things from his point of view with compassion but I’m really struggling to understand his point of view. He didn’t even care enough to tell me oh, so I shouldn’t care either, right? And yet I do.

    In my last text to him, about 2 weeks after he ghosted me, I told him that if he saw me at any point to keep on walking…

    Any insight from a Scorpio male would be greatly appreciated.

  171. Im an aquarius with moon in scorpio in the 8th house and I have major pluto aspect as well,I don’t know if its just me but I tend to be intimidating,I’m usually hated by my family because I cant keep my emotions in check most of the time,I’m the least favorite,I feel no one cares about me except my gf,I’ve never experienced that kind of special friendship that I would love to have and maybe I never will but this year taught me major things and I’ve cut someone who I considered my bff because shes not giving the same effort as I have,I’ve learned to let go a lot easier now,I’ve learned to respect myself a little more so people wont take advantage of me anymore and best of all I have learn to love myself a little more

    When it comes to love I don’t like to be chased and be charged like a bull it turns me off and will make me run faster than the flash,i tend to like the quiet ones,when i love i lose myself to the other person,i love deeply that’s why i guard my heart earnestly.

  172. Oh yes indeed! Moon/Pluto conjunction in Virgo, Sun/Neptune conjunction (plus Mars) in Scorpio – I have had to let friends go when I (finally!) realise it is all about them. My sun Virgo daughter had to help me see the light on one occasion – however it helped me to understand that I need to tap into how that person makes me feel – consistently not good then it is time to move on, however sad that may be.

  173. I have Scorpio on the cusp of the 11th house. I definitely amputate relationships with friends. I’ve done it several times.

    I’ve never thought of it as a Scorpio thing. I’m a Leo and you don’t offend or embarrass me and get away with it. I always think of it this way: I’m depriving you of me and I can’t think of a better way to hurt you than that. Yeah, yeah, I know, typical Leo!

    I would never amputate family though. Never.

  174. The worst amputation ever: waking up and discovering that she has committed suicide. She did leave a note, “sorry for all the grief I caused you.” The real grief was only beginning. I doubt if you will either read or respond, so I will just leave it there.

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