Why Am I Constantly Disillusioned?

Caspar David Friedrich Wanderer NeptuneI just finished with a client who is constantly aware of the gap between what is there is and what there can be. I’ve worked with him many times over the last ten years.  He tends to ask the same question, though it’s not obvious.

I write:

“Your two questions relate in that you are dissatisfied with what is real and tangible and being done. You have the capacity to imagine things… best case scenarios. There is nothing wrong with this. But “best case scenarios” often can’t be achieved. Even if you (or whoever) do achieve something like this, it will be fleeting.

“Fleeting” can mean one minute or one year or whatever.  Great possibilities you can dream up, can’t exist in reality over time.

Example, you buy stock in a company and it goes way up. Fine!  But something else goes down.  And the stock that went up, could have gone further up.  Life is a constant disillusion if you view it this way…”

The client is strongly Piscean with Jupiter and Neptune, prominent.

Is this familiar to you? Have you found a remedy? What is it?

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Why Am I Constantly Disillusioned? — 23 Comments

  1. Ive heard twice in the last week, “if you have no expectations, youll have no disappointments”.

    I have Jupiter sq Neptune. I havent completely got this licked, but I have found it helpful to think of everything that happens as a blessing. Aint easy, takes practice, but seems to work.

  2. My 9H Scorpio Jupiter/Neptune conjunction quinqunxes my 4H Gemini Mars. I gullibly (Jupiter) thought (Neptune) that if I constantly (Gemini) changed (quinqunx) my actions (Mars), I’d get a different result. Yes, that is the definition of insanity! I’ve permanently removed my rose-colored glasses; I trust my instincts now.

  3. With Jupiter in the 12th and Neptune in the 9th, I struggle mightily with this issue. Sometimes I’ll be flying high with visions of the future, and other times I’ll be morose for days, disappointed with my life and the world in general. I’m still wrestling with it, but to me, it comes down to faith. Faith (Neptune) that the universe is bigger (Jupiter) and a hell of a lot smarter than me, and that everything is unfolding according to plan, and that plan is in the best interests of everyone (Jupiter). It’s not easy, but I don’t really see any other way out.

    • I totally relate to this. I have a Grand Water Trine with Jupiter in Cancer, Neptune in Scorpio and Sun in Pisces. It’s a perfect example of too much of a good thing. I have struggled with fantasy and disillusionment my entire life, and after 50+ years, I still haven’t found a way to get it under control. I love what you wrote here though and will try to remember this.

  4. This is a hard one, because when youre so Piscean, (I am too) there is this fog that keeps you from seeing your current situation clearly, all you know is it feels wrong in some way, so you start to dream up a better one without having the clarity to know what to do about the current one– either to change or leave it. So you stay sort of stuck in this spiral, not knowing what it is youre missing.

    I actually pray for clarity and it helps me. I specifically ask the angels to help me. This seems to help me, especially for day-to-day problems. The bigger ones seem to have to reveal themselves a little at a time. There’s a timing for everything. I think intuitively we know that. So patience is also important. Acceptance too.

  5. I have natal jupiter opp neptune and merc and sun sag, neptune trine moon so had a big dose of over the rainbow but I consider praying for discernment & mars virgo a saving grace. Even if I’m not currently fulfilled I look for best practices and work hard on the modules that practically make up the fantasy. eg growing things, numbers and accounting course, project management course etc. I like Elsa’s saying virgo is serve or suffer and I have worked as a remedial massage therapist, tutor in high school and primary etc. It’s rough accepting reality sometimes though.This is an era of small local wins with so much structural damage to systems which used to be stable.

  6. Yup, I drive a bus; dude retired
    I put in for shift ,got it ,yeah!
    Another dude pulled seniority
    Lost it,boo hoo; so then the hot shots mama sick ,I got run temporarily ,5 weeks $$, yeah?
    Management always Two weeks
    Ahead, first paycheck 3 weeks in
    Find great disappointment in that,bullshit
    Management changed pay sheet I feel cheated!( teeth grind)
    Guess they didn’t think I would
    notice, or read or add?
    So now I tell boss thanx !&?##
    Tonite after just a 12 hr day tries to keep me in spot (mouth drop face twist,back to teeth grind)
    As hotshots ‘ truck broke down
    Might be visiting mother another
    Week?
    Argggh, truth is, if they didn’t pay
    Me I might pay for the ride each day
    As I am obsessed with the trees and ponds and brushy growth I
    See while working
    Perspective,finding happy can feel elusive ,tap your heals and realize
    There’s no place ,like me and now!!
    I am banking on like some strange
    Mysterious inheritance, cause Lotto
    Seems silly at this point
    Happy winter, decided I need
    Hot yoga ,hmm what does that cost?
    Back to Farina( sounds like kitty food for people, like ground brown rice grits, cheap dinner)Arggh

  7. Familiar fersure. It’s been a lifelong struggle for me too. Expect to go to my grave with it.

    Various tools have helped a little with specific issues.

    Currently getting into Theravada Buddhism via the book I Met a Monk.

  8. I feel you have to shift your optimism to another path or option. You have to keep believing in your higher good, otherwise what else is there? Like the La La Land happy endings there could be multiple ones, or none at all. But without the belief to keep going you’ll never know. And am writing this from a real sonar depth of a knockback right now. I was looking for maybe a Jupiter / natal Jupiter transit / opposition related post to find a clue. Saturn is square natally but the illusion that the path will be easy because it is meant is I guess the illusion. Neptune or something but it’s like either a fork in the road or am on the wrong path. There is no way of knowing just now.

  9. Ascendant sun south node mars in Pisces. Boy ever since April 2010 life seems like a constant bang. But I hear you. Relate with what you wrote.

  10. With my Asc rulers Jupiter and Neptune(not conjunct) in the 8th I find being over-idealistic is more of a problem than actual disappointment. I just expect too much and have learned to be more grounded even though it’s a Scorpio house. I do try to lead an uplifting life through helping others achieve their goals which seems to be easier than helping myself!

  11. I always ask myself:
    “What is the worst-case scenario of this situation?”
    Then I am prepared and often pleasantly surprised.

  12. Piscean types – myself included with Mercury + Neptune conjunct the SN in the 12 th – were served notice to change when Neptune conjuncted the SN in Nov 2016.

    We can no longer inspire and direct ourselves from the top down with our high spiritual ideals.
    Creating ourselves and our experience from the lower and darker instinctual and emotional centers has become imperative. Trusting and moving with a bodily held instinctual intelligence is now much more possible….

    This shift from spiritual inspiration to personal emotive inspiration will become even more imperative with the Pluto Saturn Nodal elimination this spring….

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