Venus Opposite Pluto – Death Of A Lover Or Spouse

woman-with-mourning-shawl-Van-Gogh-A client asked me if her husband were going to die.  She’d read somewhere that the Venus Pluto aspect in her chart, indicated such a thing.

I am pretty sure, Stephen Arroyo mentioned this possibility around Venus Pluto. I’m sorry I can’t reference the book. I read it twenty-five years ago, but I’m pretty sure he was specifically talking  about women with Venus opposing Pluto in their chart.  Arroyo was a great astrologer who only wrote about things he’d witnessed firsthand. I have seen the same thing he has.

I’m not talking about women who lose their husbands via age or natural causes. I’m talking about traumatic separation.  I’m talking about women who find their husband dead via suicide. I am talking about women who wake up one day to find that their husband is GONE, never to be heard from again.  I am talking about your love being obliterated.

I know a number of women and stories of women who have suffered such a thing. It’s my packed 8th house. One thing I have seen is that if the opposition is prominent (say, lying across the ascendant/descendant), it’s entirely possible this happen to a woman more than once!

Women who kill their husbands might have something like this in their chart as well.  Their spouses keep dying, yes?  But what’s important to know is that this is not the only way this aspect can manifest.

With Venus opposing Pluto, you’re guaranteed intensity in your interactions with others. Also, if you’re 40 or 50 years old and this has never happened, you’re probably at less risk than a girl of 20.

Also, some people suffer traumatic loss of a partner when they are extremely young.  Like a twin, whose twin dies as a baby.

People wonder if the transit (Pluto opposing natal Venus) puts a person at risk for this.  It does but it’s only one possibility of many. I can’t see living in fear, because you have something like this in your chart. There is nothing you can do about it.

If you wake up one morning and your husband is not in bed. And if you go in your backyard, open the shed and find him hanging, there is nothing you can do.

I know this for sure.  I was out with that couple, the night before the husband took his life. We said goodnight at midnight. My phone rang at 6 am, when his wife found him dead.  The woman had lost her first spouse to suicide, five years earlier.  Things like this get your attention.

There’s another point to make.  Jackie Kennedy lost her husband in a horribly traumatic way.  She does not have Venus aspecting Pluto. This just goes to show you there are mysteries in life..

Do you have Venus in aspect to Pluto in your chart? Have you ever suffered a traumatic separation from a loved one?



Venus Opposite Pluto – Death Of A Lover Or Spouse — 154 Comments

  1. My husband has a tight trine between Venus and Pluto. He lost a ton of people in his life, especially when he was young and Pluto was crossing his Asc. His ability to transcend pretty much blows me away. I guess that’s Pluto in the 12th.

  2. I have Venus Opposite Pluto natally and I just read that passage from Stephen Arroyo–so yeah, that’s who it’s from.

    Personally, my kind of out there theory is this placement is a past-life thing. We toyed with people’s emotions recklessly in the past so now we are getting a taste of our own medicine. I can attest to being frequently consumed by my own emotions toward others.

    I can’t get angry about it–it’s just what I have to endure and learn from. Hopefully be better for it.

    • Hope you are right Sara. My ex bf definitely manipulated me and used my love for him. He is having Pluto opp. Venus ascendant transit now and he deserves a taste of the pain and humiliation he inflicts on others. And yet, I still love him. (I’m natal Pluto/Venus exact trine btw – and KR what you say rings true)

  3. I think Howard Sasportas talks about it too.
    So, I have this. Pluto opposes both my Sun and Venus natally. Pluto is in the 4th, Sun/Venus in the 10th/11th (not near the IC/MC though).
    I’ve never experienced the death part of this aspect.
    But I have experienced very, very painful separations and some painfully let’s-just-say “complicated” relationships. I have very rarely experienced the ‘let’s go out to see a movie’ or ‘let’s go for a trip’ part of being with someone. There were long intervals of solitude between relationships, because at some point I had decided that if *not* going through the pain meant not having a relationship, then I won’t have one, thank you.
    As Pluto squares my Sun now, and my progressed Venus with it, and also natal Venus in a few years, not to mention it’s own natal position too, I find myself in therapy shedding more and more light on the issues of love and pain – and a whole lot of sh*t connected with that (that includes every standard Pluto interpretation, apart from literal death).
    I don’t know if indeed it’s better when one’s 40, I’ll get back to you in a few years for this one :).
    I just know this thing is in my chart, it’s mine, I want to own it and do some good with it…and that also means giving me a good relationship for a change. I guess you could say I’m more willing to risk now.
    I really wish that the people who have lost a loved one, in the ways you describe, have had all the loving support, from the universe and the people around them, to go on with their lives and feel happy (at some point) after all that.

    • Okay I’m a triplet and my mom said she almost lost us we all have Venus in Taurus and scorpio in Pluto but honestly its in the 5 house my Pluto so is it possible to have fear in losing kids?

    • I have venus semi-square Pluto as a natal aspect. My venus also has an opposition from my Jupiter(in 8th ruled by Pisces) & my Pluto ses-quiquadrates my Jupiter. My fiance’ died in 2013 when I waz 26yrs old. His exact cause of death waz ambiguous (Pisces on 8th?). An overdose.Don’t know whether it waz intentional or accidental as he waz suicidal yet had a previous drug problem &had been clean for 5yrs. When transit pluto started going thru my 5th house conjunct my natal Mars which in turn activated my natal venus trine mars(conj. Natal neptune) he passes away. Anyway, I don’t know if the venus/Pluto aspect maybe an indication of such a POSSIBILITY or not but this article now has me thinking

      • I don’t believe these aspects /transits are a doom sentence or that they caused any of this in my life.But I do believe they revealed an inclination of a possible outcome of the situation as we humans are creatures of habbit. So if we keep repeating unhealthy actions or habbits astrology can show potential outcomes of these inclinations.

  4. All I have to say is OMG. Yes, and this has always been a great fear of mine. I’m constantly feeling as if my love/s are going to die :/ I even tell them they better not die all the time and I must sound like a loon! But I feel/fear this.

  5. My Venus squares my Pluto (along with Mars and Saturn). I have not lost any lovers or partners in traumatic ways, but I am terrified of losing my husband. The horrible truth of it is that one of us is likely to have to deal with the death of the other at some point. The men in his family tend to die in their 60’s, and the women in my family tend to die in their 90’s – so if nothing worse happens first, I know logically, that I’m likely to lose him before I’m ready to.
    That, and he drives like an asshole.

  6. No, but I heard two stories about my cousin’s friend from my cousin.

    He and his girlfriend were out on a double date. On the way to the car they were holding hands, and a car hit her and drove off! She was killed on impact, and he was left traumatized.

    A few years later, he had became much kinder, more serious, and was driving with a friend (who is a girl) in the passenger seat. He was driving drunk and hit a tree*. Car completely wrapped around it. His friend was killed instantly, and he is still in a coma. Both families were compassionate about the whole ordeal.

    *Creepy thing is that tree is called a “dirty tree” or “evil tree” because several people have been killed hitting it. It’s a stigmatized tree. The tree is in a very bad spot, and basically shows up out of nowhere. My cousin has almost hit it before too.

  7. I have always felt like it would be so traumatic to lose the live of my life, that I’d die too. Like Romeo/Juliet. It’s that deep… I have Pluto in Libra conjunct Saturn in scorp both retrograde opposing Venus. And sun, moon, merc in the 8th. Sun/moon square neptune on the south node in the 5th. I feel love grief constantly. It’s more than intense.

  8. I have the trine but will get the opposition via transit when I am 63. But then losing a spouse around then becomes a definitely possibility anyway.

  9. I have the sextile and have experienced traumatic separations, but certainly not to this extent. I mostly lose myself in obsession, which then makes it a very hard uphill climb when I have to divest myself.

  10. I don’t have any of this in natal but one relationship where my Pluto conjoined his Venus, I actually used to get “flashbacks?” or panic attacks where I thought he was going to die, horrible. it would just come over me out of the blue…unfounded…Having said that I think had a lot to do with a couple of his planets on my South Node…never had to with other people

  11. I have a Pluto in 3rd square Venus in 12th. This has manifested more than once in deeply loving someone I couldn’t be with for various reasons. My last relationship, a 29+ year marriage recently ended because he fell in love with someone else and wanted a divorce. I ended up moving 850 miles away. It is extremely painful still and I am not sure if I will ever get over it. If I do I think I might be afraid to try again.

    • Use your power (Pluto) to change, burn off, transform the old from the new, gaining new power, knowing how to use your power…Pluto is always in power and in control… you’ll have to work your Venus with your Pluto….

  12. I’m glad there’s so much astrology information out there now for people to get to, but the downside is that without some discrimination it can be really upsetting and misleading. Someone reads something and they believe they’re “doomed” to this or that.

    Doesn’t seem like there’s enough teaching out there that balances these dreadful pronouncements and you get people in deep horrified states for days, contemplating their awful fates. Got to be a way to fix that.

  13. whew, just checked and I have venus trine pluto..not the opposition..I have never lost anyone that i can think of..I know of girl related to me by marriage who is on marriage # 4 ,one husband died, one hung himself ,one she was divorced from,and the current. always thought a little odd..extreme bad luck.

  14. I have seen Venus opposing Pluto in several charts from friends and clients and I completely agree with your article. Thanks for your blog; you’re always extremely insightful!

  15. I have sun/venus conjunct (scorpio) squaring pluto (leo) My husband died when I was 40. Always thought my saturn in scorp was the reason for so many deaths. My sister was only 7 and Mom 50 when they died. I’ve lost quite a few friends who died way too young from heart attacks, accidents and other illness.

  16. though her natal venus is not aspected by pluto, my mothers husband, my dad, committed suicide when transiting pluto and venus were in opposition to her natal venus.

  17. Ooooo pluto will be opposing natal venus sometime in the next 10 or so years. Guess I’ll have to forego a relationship to save myself the pain. Thanks for an excuse.

  18. I lost my twin brother in uterus…. I have pluto opposite venus in Taurus.

    This experience caused me to re-enact similar scenarios for all of my life,…
    Your unconscious psychology is that strong…

    But now i found out, I started to be able to change patterns.
    I can really recommend psychological involved methods of kinesiology and EFT. (or maybe combination of NLP).

    You NEED to get those beliefs out or you’ll be stuck.
    Especially because they are beyond your grasp, it’s not an easy to acces layer of your unconsciousness.

    This aspect, i think, tore my heart in millions of pieces.

  19. ” I am talking about women who wake up one day to find that their husband is GONE. never to be heard from again.”

    This is, I hope used to be, my greatest fear. I hope I can heal this with the kinesiology, it did such wonders already.
    (google N.E.T)

  20. Yes it is Elsa, but I came a lonnng way, and I understand so much more now..
    I just glad I managed to come beyond the point where i felt i couldn’t possibly live into next day. Not that I wanted dead, more like Robbie Williams sang “I don’t want to die, but I ain’t keen on living either…”
    It was just so intense, especially with interacting with others, I guess that is the power of opposition….

    Thanks <3

  21. Does this mean if I attract a natal venus opposition pluto mate I am going to die? Spooky information. I am bewitched by it.

  22. Notch,

    Maybe just before you die, you might bump into one.
    I feel it is more the other way around… we can actually feel parts of a possible future of people, but we are not at all aware of it.. it think.
    So you will find one, and it will not change your destiny or something, it is your path that attracts certain people……

  23. Venus 4/5 cusp opposite Pluto in 11. This is two corners of a grand cross also. Have had a couple of traumatic separations and also my best friend was murdered by her estranged husband when tPluto was on my Scorpio Moon.

  24. I agree we may attract these great loves who want to die, subconscious or not… Or they may need to be healed from some type of grief or loss that happened to themselves. Very eery…. Tragic.

  25. Remember that extreme badboy Ted Bundy had a Leo Pluto/Saturn ( 12th ) square Venus in Scorpio in 3rd. Watch out for the square in a Male. Can get nasty.

  26. My husband has pluto conjunct moon, opposing sun, inconjunct venus, and square saturn in his natal chart. He lost both his parents in a car accident the same day a few years ago. Since then he found out he has cancer expects to die soon/eventually, just not sure when. He has become miserable and negative, and after trying everything I could think of to help I have given up trying. He doesn’t want to be happy or learn or grow or change. He has given up so what could I possibly do?

    Pluto is transiting his first house activating a cardinal cross with his natal t-square with his sun in aries, moon and pluto in libra, and saturn in cancer. I don’t know if he will make it through this transit, but that might not be such a terrible thing. As horrible and insensitive as it sounds, his death might bring a lot of relief from suffering for both of us.

    I have natal venus semisextile pluto, but I doubt this means the same as the opposition. Also, t. pluto has been in trine with both my husband (taurus) and I’s (virgo) natal venus for a few years now. Last thing, venus was trine pluto in my solar return this and again next year. Guess we’ll see what happens. :/

  27. My stepmother has a a big Aquarius Stellium, including Venus, opposing her Leo Pluto. She hasn’t lost a companion, but was divorced when she married a widower. Dad has his 5th house Scorpio Venus square 2nd house Leo Pluto. So, these are two people with heavy Venus/Pluto, who’ve been together for almost 30 years now. I think sometimes shared hard aspects are really what bring people together, synastrywise.

  28. Venus opp Pluto, here. I have lost many, many people close to me, beginning with a lifelong friend who committed suicide when I was 13.

    My partner didn’t die, but I was in a relationship with someone who very nearly died in an accident. Horrific injuries he was disabled by early on in the relationship, which defined the relationship itself.

    I fully expect my partner to die. Every day he leaves the house. He has a dangerous job, for one. He’s also a Scorpio Moon/ASC with a jacked chart and crappy transits.

    I have known more people to die from sudden, terrible things than people who have simply grown old, got sick and then died.

  29. Also, having Saturn in my 8th aspecting everything in my chart doesn’t help. I have done everything I could possibly do to combat the feeling ______ will die (well, of course we all die). Acupuncture, meditation, reiki, psychotherapy, yoga, spiritual pursuit, etc etc. This paranoia has a life of its own.

    • Ugh, I have that too, Kashmiri. Saturn 8th conjunct SN makes aspects to ALL the traditional planets in my chart. It’s a struggle to just be happy. I spent the first 30 years of my life battling chronic depression. It’s gotten better with age, though, and some focused and intense soul work. If you do the work, Saturn always rewards it. <3

  30. Venus exact trine Pluto – so many loved ones died when I was young that I was afraid to get close to anyone for a long time. However, I also have Venus square Saturn. With time and maturity, we broke the cycle when my second spouse was close to death; we won and now there is nothing left to fear…

  31. I don’t have Venus opposition Pluto, but my father did. Don’t know if the astrological predictions would be that different for men versus women, but he did not lose a spouse to death. He was, however, an unbelievably, non-stop manipulative individual. I’m not even sure it was on purpose. I do not think he had any concept that relationships could be based on anything but manipulation.

    It’s sad to think of the loneliness at the bottom of it, but it sure got tiresome to be on the receiving end of it…

  32. Hey there Elsa! Venus is quincunx and exactly counter-parallel Pluto natally for me. Transit-wise, Pluto is sitting on my Sun/South Node in 7th house – and there were tons of other confirming things that pointed to death and it was very sudden and shocking. Another Cappie relative of mine whose Bday is close went through the same thing about 3 months after I did (but hers wasn’t such a sudden event, but still an unexpected turn).

  33. My mother has Venus in Aquarius opposite Pluto in Leo. Her first husband abandoned her (twice), and then cheated on her, effectively abandoning her a third time. It appears this aspect does indicate this kind of thing happening, though Pluto always represents what we can’t control, so there is no point in worrying about it.

  34. “though Pluto always represents what we can’t control, so there is no point in worrying about it.”

    True, MagicZara.

    Why does Pluto do this? As soon as one becomes comfortable, Pluto rips your soul to shreds.

    You have 2 options with Pluto, either accept change and rise above or resist it and self destruct.

    It isn’t fair.

  35. Natal Pluto and Uranus in Virgo, opposing my natal Venus, Chiron and Saturn in Pisces. Traumatic loss and separation are my life.

    I’ve been heart-friends or the relative of more than 25 people who have died. Sometimes I feel like death follows me around waiting to pounce and make me learn something else. My romantic relationships begin and end suddenly (possible Taurus decision making).

    I hope I learn the lessons I need to so that I don’t have to do this again…too much loss can rip your heart to shreds and it gets hard to put back to together over time.

    I have become a very good seamstress, however. And have hope that my crazed, ironic sense of humor will save me in the end.

    Namaste Elsa

  36. What about a venus pluto transit? does it operate the same way? is it only the opposition or does the conjunction and square also bring traumatic separation?

  37. My first husband was a Taurus sun had a venus/saturn conjunction opposition his poorly placed pluto. He started experiencing loss at the age of 7. First his brother at 7 then his dad at 11. Both were very sudden and tragic. When I met him he was in his 30’s and had loss every one of his best friends to tragic death. That is actually how I met him. A friend of mine asked me to accompany him to check on his friend because the friend had just lost his BFF to a tragic motorcycle accident. My ex-husband was the friend who needed consoling. After we got to know each other, I realized every loved one he ever spoke about had passed away. All him his sentences started with “may his soul rest in peace” whenever he spoke of a loved one. It was very sad because he was incapable of getting close to people by the time he was a grown adult and unfortunately it was one of the reasons we divorced. Towards the end of our relationship, I was in constant fear of him killing me out of passion. It was definitely a forbidden love affair and it was very intense. I seriouly felt i was going insane during our divorce., because we had a deep emotional connection and it was hard to leave the relationship even though I knew it wasn’t good for us to be together. Maybe it was his venus/saturn conjunction opposition my pluto/saturn Conjunction, mixed with his venus pluto opposition.

  38. Elsa, I just read this passage in Arroyo’s book, and it includes the conjunction too. Do you also see it happen to people with the conjunction? It’s hard to not be spooked by this kind of statement – I have venus conj. pluto in 6th house Scorpio. I have yet to feel loss of a partner but I am also a late bloomer (at 26) with Saturn in the 7th house.

    • Janna, as I mentioned in the post, I have seen people with NO Venus Pluto aspect lose their spouse in a way that is particularly traumatic. Specific to your conjunction, it does not smell like this to me. You could be a doctor with that aspect, serving spouses who die and the partner they leave behind.

    • Hi Janna, wonder if you will read this (2018 now) but i also have venus – Pluto conjunct in Scorpio in the 6th and Saturn in the 7th… i wonder if we were born around / at the same time ☺

  39. Venus in Scorpio Square Pluto in Leo involved in out of sign
    T-square with Moon in early Gemini.

    Not only have I lost – traumatically and young 2 ex lovers..
    My extended family and friends and my Sister have all lost Children at ages 14, 16 and 26. I wonder if the Moon being where it is indicates this ?

    That is a part of my Natal Chart I would gladly give away…

  40. Oh and i almost forgot, I have an astrological “twin”, a cousin born same day as me with i assume a different rising sign, or perhaps Moon at Algol or Pliedes. Her Father died in a small plane crash when we were 11.
    As for how this Uranian influenced my life ? My Dad was a commercial pilot and Mom a Srewardess. She shared many of the losses of Children with me.

  41. My boyfriend not only has a tight Pluto/Venus square in his chart, he has his Pluto tightly conjunct my Sun.

    He is always afraid of losing me, or me leaving him. So far he hasn’t lost any spouses or anything, though he did lose three grandparents. He has also been in two traumatic accidents, though I chalk that up to his Saturn/Jupiter square.

    Maybe his Venus/Pluto square has more to do with his love of zombies and vampires?? LOL

  42. My mother has lost her partners twice. She has a venus/ Pluto / mars conjunction aspect in Virgo.
    My father lost his parents in a murder/ suicide. He has venus pisces opp very late leo Pluto.

    I inherited venus conjunct Pluto in scorpio. I attract tragic people? Or maybe I will be the tragedy anyhow I’ve come to peace with it. My daughter has the venus sq Pluto aspect.

  43. My current FI and my previous FI both have Venus/Pluto conjunct, 12th house. They both self-isolated, it seems, from their small families. They are/have made themselves pretty much on their own from their 40s. Plus both had coldness from one parent or both.

    What’s strange, to me, is I have Uranus Pluto in 12th, not conjunct, and I think the Uranus “pulls” them out of their mental prisons. They cling like krazy glue to me even after breakup points and that’s the only thing I can think of.

    What’s beautiful though is that astrology allows that 3rd eye of true awareness; by that I mean that I see that members here, all of us, we all have some fked up aspects, and yet we all aren’t at the aspects’ whim like those we know. We can piece together, day by day, the possible ‘whys’ something is happening to those around us/with us. For that, I am forever thankful for Elsa, Satari, everyone here and other astro blogs.

  44. When my Mother died in 2009, I had Venus opposite Pluto (Venus in Tau house 5) Amazingly enough, Mars was at 29* Cancer (Literally the end of mother) and her midheaven was 29* Virgo (The end of her terms of service perhaps?). My N.Node is at 4* Pisces, so it is no surprise that Chiron was at 4* in Cancer…guess our charts were pretty tied together…
    She spent the night with my all female family and the next morning, she died from a heart attack…Must have been that leo transit right before (Got Michael Jackson and many others)

  45. I have natal venus opposite natal Pluto. When I first started learning about astrology in my late twenties and discovered this aspect, it put me in a very dark place as I became obsessed with the prospect of meeting men who might leave or die on me. I did not realise at the time that the depression/anxiety/feelings of loss were connected to the loss of my twin at birth. She was my soulmate. I have had short relationships but never married.

  46. Also, just before my daughter was born her father walked away and literally disappeared. Twenty years later he resurfaced (through my ‘excavation’) and he now sees her and helps her financially.

  47. Thanks Elsa. I now have progressed Venus conjunct my natal Venus opposite Pluto. I have Venus retrograde natally and now it has gone back to its original position. Am wondering about the effects …

  48. I have venus inconjunct pluto in my chart. Venus in 1st house but not laying across the asc/desc. I lost one love of my life through AIDs- he had it when I met him and I didn’t know it. I lost my fiance last year suddenly in a motorcycle accident when Pluto was square my venus, saturn opp my sun and uranus conjunct my venus. He had a mars uranus opp and a sun conjunct mars in his chart and sat, pluto and uranus were aspecting his sun and mars.

  49. Sorry to hear of your losses Lila. How painful for you. Mars/Uranus people are risk takers and like to live life in the fast lane, as you probably know. Venus is also in my first house opposite Pluto in my seventh. Fortunately I have some good aspects to Venus – trine Neptune and conjunct Jupiter and asc., but inconjunct Saturn.

    • I think we have similar stories. I have my Venus in Taurus in my first house and Pluto in my 7th. I also have the Venus trine Neptune aspect. I lost my father right after I was born.

  50. have just discovered with software, that (slow moving) transiting Pluto has been going in/out of opposition to my natal Venus for a couple of years now!…during this time, my wife has left me and my finances+career have taken a nosedive. (only)2 more months in direct opposition. what an awful transit!

  51. My ex has venus opposite pluto and while we were together his ex before me took her own life. The ripple effect that followed was so tragic and devestating that things almost instantly fell apart for us after this.

    • Wow, k, coincidentally, I know two male friends who have Pluto opposition to Venus in their charts and they both had a close female friend or lover commit suicide and both are haunted by that. One of the friends is a graceful and eloquent Aquarius who’s close female friend committed suicide and while it haunted him he still had long committed relationships with women (he moved to Seattle from Buffalo NY with the girlfriend he was partnered with for 7 years and she was so jealous and insecure he broke up with her and he’s been with his current girlfriend for 5 years- they were friends in Buffalo and she moved out here to be with him), a healthy self-love and self-respect (and respect for women without overstepping boundaries so it seems all women are attracted to him or feel comfortable with emotional intimacy, meaning he fits into a group of women talking about their feelings as if he’s a woman but at the same time provides a safe platonic connection and philosophical conversation everyone loves. People just love being around him and relax in his presence so it’s funny to see him sometimes because he attracts gorgeous creative women and he’s creative too, but the heart chakra connection between everyone is so deep and sincere. I love hearing his voice because it’s so crisp He annunciates so clearly, and the philosophical thoughts are profound and even though anyone can see the depth and sensitivity in his eyes he always holds himself (posture) in such a dignified manner, it’s like he would naturally be suited to wearing the robe and crown of a king, speaking lovingly to his court inside the walls of the castle, never objectifying people or women. He holds eye contact with people and everyone feels a connection with him but he’s unpretentious and introspective yet a true thinker and philosopher who enjoys engaging people. He’s just easy to care about and love as a person and has a softness yet also masculinity that he’s secure with so he’s just a very balanced and stable guy.

      The other male friend is an Aries who’s girlfriend committed suicide and he also is a guy that everyone loves to be around. He’s successful in his career and always makes everyone laugh. He’s the kind of guy who has an intense fiery energy, not really any soft feminine energy like my Aquarius friend. Yet there is this intensely profound way about his fiery energy. He’s like a conscientious flaming bonfire that is mindful of not burning anyone. I mean in groups of people he can be so funny yet deep, and a few young people loved being around him and he was always encouraging and sweet to them in a fatherly way that was gentle and kind, and they always seemed so grateful of any nuance he might have of emotional support without becoming emotional himself. It’s hard to explain. He seemed protective of people and yet never overwhelmed by anyone’s emotions or vulnerability and if someone ever felt awkward or insecure, he would never make someone feel disconnected and estranged as if he had something to prove to himself about his own masculinity or his own sense of knowing who he was or what he values. For about two years he was my neighbor and he only had groups of the same friends over all the time and then dated someone briefly who didn’t want a relationship and he was disappointed by that, but then the next woman he dated was the ONE and they started out seeming sweet and shy and lighthearted but they fell hard for each other and you can see it in the photos as the years went by. They got married and just had a baby this past year. When I saw the photos of their announcement that they were getting married I cried because they looked so in love and I never saw him so happy and it just moved me to tears to see them in such a healthy relationship. They are so perfect for each other. He’s very fiery and masculine yet has a stable solid authoritative fatherly demeanor everyone looks up to (I think everyone projects the alpha male ideologies onto him) and his wife is very soft and feminine. They balance one another in such a lovely way. You can see they’re completely opposite yet they appreciate one another for who they are, without wanting to change them or make the other more like themselves and over time you can see their faces glow in the photos. They look like fire and water, and there is a magical magnetic quality to the mystery in the dance between them. I can tell he respects and reveres her, and I feel like they will together for the rest of their lives in happiness.

  52. I have Venus in the 8th in Aries opposite Pluto in the 3rd in Libra, and have, as some others also have mentioned, always had a fear of the person not being there, or with me, like something might happen to him and he will just be gone. This causes me to ‘check up’ on people as soon as I start a relationship with them – why aren’t they responding to my texts or calls? Why aren’t they calling? I expect them to disappear from my life. And they do – because, I think, this makes me look clingy and a little nuts. I also have a Grand Trine with Venus trining Saturn trining Neptune, and the Venus-Pluto opposition forms a Kite. Does that add a positive aspect to the whole thing, or is it the opposition that is causing tension to an otherwise positive aspect?

  53. Oh wow, my ex has his asc conjunct venus at 12 degrees cancer, and I have my moon at 12 degrees cancer… when pluto rx opposed us, we broke up in a traumatic way. Very painful. So I know for him was devastating. But things happen for a reason.

  54. I will experience the Venus (natal) -Pluto (transiting) opposition at 21 degrees Cancer and in the 9th house in a few/several years from now. I already have read some about this aspect. This may be simple, but as for everyone self-love has been a roller coaster ride for me. I haven’t been in a long lasting love partnership for ten years now which I see as a refection of this inner struggle for self acceptance and learning how to communicate in a way such as to encourage staying power in my relationships. The absence of commitment and the presence of a man in my sexual connections with men has been something I’m also learning to grieve… to feel into the disappointment, to cry my tears so that I can move forward and leave “that” disconnect behind… and little by little to rebuild my relationships from the ground up. I see the coming opposition I’ll experience not necessarily as a death of a partner, but possibly as part of this process of learning how to create, “stay with” and protect my intimate connection. Basically, to show up for him and for myself in greater ways. Ironically, my mother suddenly lost her husband, my dad, when I began to feel and experience an unable to sustain commitment/intimacy.

  55. I have Venus opp Pluto. All my romantic relationships have ended abruplty or never really get off the ground. Even since I was in grade school. I am about to be 28 and never had a romance. Just a bunch of short lived fwb. I also have a twin and now im afraid of losing him. Im closest to him and mom my mom….those are my rocks Im terrified to lose them. Is there anything good about this placement?

    I just lost my cuz this past summer…abruptly

  56. You know what’s interesting, is this is for a female, yet my father has this aspect in his chart and left his wife one day saying he was going to the market , never to return. He would also leave home and just disappear for months at a time, also had a difficult childhood and losses….very interesting….

  57. Hi, read this with interest.
    I have a grand cross… Pluto in 4th (Cancer) opposite Venus in 10th (Aquarius) squared to Mars in 12th house (Taurus) and Saturn in my 6th house in Scorpio.
    My father died abruptly when I was 14 years old. My relationship with my mother was difficult, much pain, and I was very grief stricken for a number of years. I only came out of the impact of grief in my mid-thirties well 40. I worked hard on myself to pull myself out of this.
    I have not had a love relationship that has been ‘happy’ / good. I have been cheated on and I have learned to cut through that. I have accepted the blows and would rather be single than not in a healthy relationship .. I feel pretty balanced now ironically (grounded deep down) and would be able to have a good loving relationship I believe but not come accross someone for that…. so that’s the way it is.
    I have a sun and moon in the 11th house (Aries).
    Tough, sometimes lonely, miss affection and loving… and I am very affectionate by nature but … I have no close family alive now so… one has to adjust.
    To top it all now I am going through my second Saturn return (!) and to my dismay I am afraid, not looking forward to the fact that Saturn (transit) is going retrograde from today (I am in the UK) in my 6 house while Mars (my ruler) started going retrograde yesterday in my 5th house.
    Someone give me a break… I have navigated a pack of tough years… but I work with cancer patients and they remind me that I have to be grateful … as I am still standing.

  58. Fortunately, I have never lost anyone close to me through death. However, I have never had a long lasting relationship or friendship in my 18 years of living. I can never seem to make that connection with people. These relationships also end very abruptly. Mainly over petty things and arguments.. This could be because I am very young and children burn bridges over the smallest problem but I can’t seem to connect with family members either. It’s truly distressing. I feel like I have taken after my mother who doesn’t have Venus/Pluto but is very fond of burning bridges with those closest to her. I will have to do some soul searching to try and find the true source of my dilemma. In the mean time I hope that I will one day find a group of people I can connect to and who will be there for me and vice versa for a long time. 🙂

  59. Hi Elsa, I just came across your article. Interesting I have Venus 21 degrees and Mars 28 degrees in Aquarius and they both oppose Pluto in Leo in the 12th house. My Venus is in the sixth house and my Mars is placed in the 6 th conjunct the 7 th house Descendent opposing Pluto which is also conjunct my 29 degree Leo Ascendent. I have had many surgeries. I also had separation through family members. Two Scorpio Sisters and actually a Scorpio sister in law. I always run into jealous people even at this stage in my life. My husband is a Scorpio and we have had our ups and downs. Venus…issues with love, money and sex. I was told by an Astrologer this is my theme to work on in this life. My Mother has passed when I was 43 my Dad is still alive at the age of 89. I have 7 siblings. I have lost cousins that I was close to other than that I can’t say anything about Venus Opp Pluto except that my husband has a gambling addiction. I recently had someone I was once engaged to die. I have run into many abusive people during my lifetime and was sexually molested by a brother twice. I had a serious injury when I was 10 years old. A young girl was running and pushed me into a steel beam. I was in the hospital for a week. The accident pushed my top teeth back up into my jaw.

  60. If I remember good Stephen Arroyo, in his book mentioned this possibility around Venus Pluto in men chart. Because Venus represent his wife. I think it makes more sense if men has this aspect in his chart or Venus conjunct Pluto.

    How comes that this aspect in women chart predict dead of the spouse, should it be the another way around?

  61. I have my Venus in Taurus conjunct my Ascendant (7 degrees Taurus). My Pluto is in Scorpio and it is conjunct my Descendant at 7 degrees as well. So I have a Venus Opposite Pluto. Two months ago I lost my father who I was very close to. Not sure if it applies to loved ones in general or just lovers/spouses. Although I was reading the interpretations of my symbolic degrees and one mentioned about a divorce/widowhood. Interesting…. Mostly scared.

  62. Hello there. I am sorry to hear about your friends husband. I thought Venus opposite Pluto meant that they were opposing each other? Could you please clarify this as I am just starting to teach myself astrology (I have found this article very interesting). I do have Venus opposite Pluto, I did have a traumatic event, where things changed over night. My ex finance became schizophrenic, disappeared and came back a different person.

  63. My husband has Venus conj Pluto natally, and now Venus is in transit approaching his natal Pluto (10th). I am “in danger, girl” I guess? LOL. What else. If you don’t hear from me…..

      • Shall I be your crash test dummy? Nowm I am unlikely to off myself though my life is fifty shades of crap right now because my friends and I say “don’t kill your self, kill THEM,” eh? But…if I run for it or have a bad check-up, I will record it here. Most likely I will transform shortly into a person my husband won’t be able to cope with ( ie, myself, the me he deplores)!

  64. So what if Jackie had no natal Pluto/Venus aspect like that ? Maybe it came through another part of her astrology or maybe she did experience Venus opp Pluto during a solar return when JFK died. Or during a progressed aspect. I could look but so far haven’t yet.

  65. I have Venus oppose Pluto Natally. Venus on DSC, Pluto near ASC. Love at first sight in 2010. I lost him due to a conniving lying jealous woman spreading rumors about me. 5 years later, I still ache for “the one who got away.”

  66. My husband has Venus oppose Pluto Natally. Not on the Asc or Dsc.

    He also has Pluto almost exact (conjct) his moon (transit) right now.

    If all this is true I guess it wont be long until someone finds me dead!

    He has no relationship with his family at all but I have not known him to ever lose someone in a tragic way or even at all.

    So, guess I am dead man walking!!! If you notice me gone…well ….

  67. I have Venus (Cancer, 8th house) square Pluto (Libra, 11th house).
    Since early childhood I feared losing people I love (and I know how stupid it is to live in fear). My loved ones started dying early. My mom was the last to go, I was barely out of my teens.
    My husband has Mars (3rd) opposite Pluto (9th) and has had many potentially fatal accidents. Including drowning (Neptune in the 12th opposite Sun in the 6th).
    We have Venuses in conjuction and right now transiting Pluto is beginning an opposition with my Venus and will soon “touch” his…
    The bright side of this is that we have been feeling for a while that we need to change things, start a business together… I can only hope that we can use this energy for rebirth, new start of some kind.

  68. Hello, I have Pluto (rising) opp Venus (7th house). When I was a kid, one guy that was about to be my bf died. During my teenage years relationships have been very intense, guys always left me but somehow all of them wanted to keep contact with me until I dont want it anymore. Somehow I feel I dont deserve nothing stable with anyone, a real relationship and I always get infactuated or obsses with the “wrong” person. I have many Venus aspects like venus square to mars or venus sextile saturn and moon, also venus trine Neptune and Uranus. I do enjoy creating tragic love scenarios in my head… I havent live them and I hope not to.

    Thank you for the info!

  69. My Pluto is 7.38 degrees of Libra. My descendant is 28.53 degrees of Taurus. Saturn is in my 8th house-Cancer. My fiance’ was murdered in August of 2013. I am not a skilled enough astrologer to read my chart and see if there were any other warning signs.

  70. My father has Venus conj Pluto in the second. My mom died at 53yo. I got divorced when Pluto opposed my Venus in the 7th. Let’s just say burying the memory of my marriage has been very difficult. 7 years I still get angry or upset even writing this I feel it in my chest.

  71. A very good friend has Venus conjunct Pluto in Leo. Her husband suddenly decided after 25 years of marriage that he wanted to be a women. They are now divorced.

    Another very good friend has Venus in Aquarius opposition Pluto in Leo. She has been married to a Scorpio for 30+ years with no major issues.

    I had 3 other friends with Venus in Scorpio and they all seemed to have a habit of getting in very “heavy” relationships often with violence involved…..
    I stopped being friends with them because I was just sick of all the self-imposed drama!

  72. I remember when transit Pluto first opposed my natal Venus and squared my nodes… I walked out on my abusive ex and moved several states away without any warning. Even though it was necessary –it still felt like the death of a spouse.

  73. Does Pluto opp. Venus always have to mean a death? I was with my partner 7 wonderful years and and he is the only man I ever truly felt in love with. He is extremely independent, I think because he didn’t want to lose his freedom and yet we were together. It felt like we were made for each other and could feel each other’s thoughts sometimes. Until this year anyway. On almost the day his Uranus sq. Venus and during his Pluto opp. Venus transit, he very suddenly blew up at me blaming me for things I had nothing to do with, his taxes, etc. And now…total silence. He may as well be dead. I have been very depressed, had suicidal thoughts and cry easily. Thankfully, my friends at work have been a tremendous support.
    But I wonder, will it stop? Any of you who have had that transit, would he ever want to speak to me again and transform into a better way of relating? That’s what I thought Pluto did was make us wake up to ourselves and change for the better.

  74. When Pluto went into opposition with my moms Venus/Saturn my dad died suddenly from a heart attack. She has Venus sextile Pluto in her natal chart. He had Venus square Pluto in his. I have Venus square Pluto and have experienced painful separations.

  75. I have Venus in the 12th opposite Pluto in the 6th I have experienced this all my life with friends dying in traumatic ways. I am losing a friend a month lately . I have felt like the angel of death my whole life. Drug overdoses, car accidents involving alcohol, going into hospitals never coming out type of stuff. I have had 4 partners threaten to kill themselves but not go through with it. In my love relationships one of us usually leaves abruptly most of the time it being me because I can sense its about to be over! Thanks Elsa for the insight

  76. Venus square Pluto, and Pluto square the ascendant. Moon square
    Pluto, pluto sextile Neptune, Pluto conjunct jupiter and saturn (although idk if those apply)

    Yes, many lovers, always ending in dramatics!! And hell if I could just keep one, I wouldn’t have had so damn many!!?

  77. My Aries mother has Venus & Mercury in 1st house square Pluto in the 4th. Sadly, my Leo birth father died of suicide when I was 2-1/2 years old. She also has Sun in the 12th house square Pluto. The death of my father was a very hard blow to my mother and it colored the rest of our lives. But she remarried 4 years later to my Taurus stepfather and they have been together 50+ years, even though he’s going thru a health challenge now.

    I have Venus semisextile Pluto and I’ve been divorced for many years, but I don’t know if there’s any correlation with that.

  78. I looked at the 3 deaths that changed my life profoundly. I have an 8th house moon. Transiting venus was conjuncting my natal moon for both of my siblings deaths as well as the transiting moon conjuncting my natal sun (was my father’s Uranus in the 8th???). The third death is more austere, but the transiting moon was in the moon ruled 4th house and venus was inconjunct my natal moon.

    Anyway, that’s just a look at it. I don’t put a lot of stock in it. I’d go nuts living by a formula like that. Shit happens and sometimes it’s difficult. Very difficult.

    • I have the Scorpio Moon in my 12th house today, so musing is kind of nice right now. Otherwise, yes, it probably would not be as interesting. Just saying.

  79. I do not have this aspect in my own chart. My cousin (she was born during the massive Aquarius stellium of Feb. 1962 which is a completely different topic but interesting nonetheless!) has Pluto (2nd house Virgo) opposite her Venus (8th house Pisces) and her husband did commit suicide. I can’t remember if she was 29 or 30 when that happened. I have venus square pluto in my own chart and I have not lost a spouse.

    • Yes, Momof5, you can’t single out 1 aspect as Elsa says. You have to look at the other planets, too. I have Mars square Pluto and I’m not sure how that plays out in my life. Bruce Lee also had that aspect, but I never want to fight — I’m a Libra! However, my older brother used to fight with me when I was younger and a girl in jr high school got into a nasty fight with me (black eye, etc.), but I think it has to with the other aspects in my chart, too. I do defend myself and it has toughened me up, so it’s not all bad. 🙂

  80. Hi Elsa

    Look at this blog, so many sufferers. I am very familiar with this aspect, whew!
    I’m not going to go into details, but; from a very young age, I experienced this aspect. It shows up in the forms you mention,abandonment by death,its like clock work; 7 yrs, 14 yrs, serious stuff. This aspect goes beyond trauma, but you know what, it does make you stronger, or maybe I was just born this way.

  81. My ex-wife had venus opposed pluto and we had venus-pluto opposition in our composite. Six months after the death of her mother (and nine months after death of mine) she abruptly asked me to move out and then basically stopped communicating with me. (She also has Uranus conjunct ascendant oppose Moon in aquarius conjunt mars on the descendant.) It was brutal. (She had just started work as a hospice social worker.) Uranus in Aries conjunct both our suns at the time with pluto squaring — my sun conjunct nadir so Uranus on my nadir as well. So, lots of factors, but the brutality of the way she cut off communication made like she had died. So, I think this can take lots of forms and can be projected.

  82. Hello Elsa, Pluto (2. house Scorpio) opposition Venus (8. house) can be the death of a child. I have found this in two cases. Love, Micha

  83. I have a 12th house Venus squaring Pluto in the 8th and Venus square Uranus in the 8th. I have read those are generally not good aspects for stable long-term relationships.

  84. This is very interesting and helpful. I’m so glad you had this topic on the forum Elsa. In my situation it is like a death and very much a manipulation, especially in the year or two leading up as Pluto teased his DSC before it opposed Venus. It’s depressing to think that one person can be so brutal to another. Stronger…I guess so. We have to don’t we? Projection? Yes, most definitely. I could tell you things that Jung would find very interesting in the lead up to my bf’s “demise”.

  85. Pluto scorpio asc oppposed venus taurus descendant, experienced traumatic separation like divorce (all of sudden, after a great night with husband, in the afternoon, we fought that I just found out he’s cheating on me, he left and never came back), my fiancee passed away, and a bf passed away…
    You’re right about this “One thing I have seen is that if the opposition is prominent (say, lying across the ascendant/descendant), it’s entirely possible this happen to a woman more than once!”
    I am really afraid of having any relationship now, not ready for another heart attack, can’t endure anymore

      • Dear Elsa, I’m okay now, thanks a lot, my divorce was happened this years, I got no idea where I got this power to move on so fast, and then I read some articles about Scorpio/Pluto rising who can heal themself very quick through transformation, now I know and aware that I’m “new” myself 😉

  86. I have venus opp pluto. in one significant relationship the person died suddenly, in another he left me very suddenly. Scared of any other relationships.

  87. Actually my mother died in 2008 was born 2/18/1963 in san diego at 444pm i added 45 days to her chart and got venus conjunct chiron opposite pluto and uranus…. her part of death at pisces 14°6 mars a quincunx venus node sesquisquare venus with aries in the 8th house and scorpio in the first… which was my first clue to death that year … suprisingly it all seems to fit together now..

  88. Natally, I have Venus in my 3rd (ruling my 4th and 9th), conjunct Mercury (ruler of my 5th and 8th) opposite Pluto in 9th (ruling my 10th) and have lost several people.

    I lost my mom in my teens, then my brother and then my sister. I lost my twin in utero, had a few miscarraiges, lost a romantic partner (he died in an accident) and also lost my boyfriend.

    yup, Venus opp pluto can be tough to deal with

  89. I’m concerned about a dear friend of mine after looking at her chart and hope some of you might be able to discern more about what these aspects may indicate.
    Natally, she has Venus in Cancer (18+d) in her 11th house to an exact conjunction with her anti-Vertex (Vertex in the 5th).Recently and for the next year and a half or so Pluto will be conjunct her Vertex with direct and retrograde motions. Her natal Pluto is at 17d Libra in her 2nd house. Also, in her Solar Arc chart Pluto will conjunct her IC within 1 to 2 years. All this seems attention worthy but I’m not sure what to really say about it. Again might any of you know what to anticipate? Thank you!!!

  90. In my synastry with my husband, his Venus sits exactly on my midheaven at 9 Pisces, tightly opposing my Pluto conjunct IC at 10 Virgo. Venus rules my Libra in 4th, though, where my sun sits. I already suspect I’m going to outlive him anyway with my 8th house Saturn conjunct South Node in Aquarius. I worry about it sometimes, but that Pluto has already caused me a lot of painful losses of family, both figurative and literal. In a way, I expect it. He’s a keeper, so I’m happy and grateful that we got to be together at all. Mostly I just try to treasure the time. Pluto comes for us all eventually.

  91. It’s timely to see this article pop up again. I got a chance to review my late grandmother’s chart. She had a tight orb Venus in Capricorn opposite Pluto in Cancer in her chart. Her story is one of tragedy and resilience. She was widowed twice during her lifetime, both times when she had preadolescent sons and then nearly lost her third common-law spouse after he was shot during an armed robbery. He survived but eventually left her for somebody else after 30 years. She stopped partaking in romance after that. But that’s hardly all of the story. She took many blows. But she always maintained her composure and dignity.

    She died a few months before her Uranus return and her Neptune opposition Neptune. She was sooo relieved to be set free from this plane of existence.

  92. Mary Shelley had transit Pluto opposite her Venus when her husband Percy Shelley died. My boyfriend died when transit Pluto squared my Venus.

  93. My marriage ended the day Tr Pluto trined my Pluto; Tr Pluto squared my Sun; Tr Saturn conjunct my Venus; Tr Mercury crossed my ASC; and Tr Mars trined my Vertex. That was some fated day! lol.

  94. i have the opposition. and, it’s complicated. lots of near misses. mother nearly died when i was five. best friend nearly died in her twenties. (illnesses.) spouse nearly died a few months post marriage. (accident.) a child i’m guardian of has leukemia… but will probably make it.
    moved across the continent, away from all my extended family at nine. that was traumatic.
    but those planets are also in aspect to eris, neptune, saturn, uranus, and asc. close to a six pointed star (fuzzy orbs.)

  95. Yes, I have (natal) Pluto (Leo) opposing Venus (Aquarius) and my boyfriend was killed in a car accident when I was 18.

  96. Wow. I had no idea. When I was younger, a lot of my boyfriends died right after we split up. Now that I’m 41, and for the past decade, I live with this intense fear that whenever my partner doesn’t call back or disappears for some reason, I immediately have an intense fear that they’re dead. Which can be excruciating even if it’s not real, and I’ve actually broken up with people when they do this ti me. Since they know how I feel about it. Also the main reason why I chose to not have kids, I think I wouldn’t be able to handle this fear if it were my child. If you have any advice reading all this, please share!! This really is an issue. Thank you!

      • Yes, I was so shocked I forgot to mention it! Pluto in Libra in my 9th house conj. MC, opp. Venus and Mercury in Aries in my 3rd house. Saturn Rx in Leo 8th house, Sun in Pisces 3rd house, and Uranus in Scorpio 10th house. I have been reading about it all day! I don’t understand how it can be a good thing, how to make it work. I always assumed I was just plain unlucky in relationships. Shadow work is what I’m reading now. If you have ANY advice please let me know! Thank you!!

      • Oh and Cancer Mars in the 7th house ??? I’ve been in a million relationships and they were all awful!! I’ve wanted it all my life and at 41 I think it’s time to give up ?

        • Maybe it’s also my 12th house Neptune in Sag.,my imagination is too vivid. Which also makes me fall in love with potential mostly, ignore all red flags, and just go for it, as bad as it might look. Sorry for the overload of info! But reading other people’s comments really helped me, maybe this will help someone else too.

  97. I read this after all that’s been written about the upcoming 1/12/20 conjunction in Capricorn post. The 1/12 transit hits my family in a way that, to be perfectly honest scares me; me-4th, hubby exact on this DC and our daughter in her 8th. It’s as if it’s foretelling my hubby will die during the transit. I have Venus conjunct Pluto in my 12th and yes, I have suffered a traumatic loss when our son committed suicide 4 1/2 years ago. I want to scream to the universe “I’VE LOST ENOUGH”!

  98. I am a man and I was in relationship with someone who’d always shower me with gifts and through my own care for them I decided to reciprocate sexually. It wasn’t meant as manipulation. I eventually stopped although I developed feelings for them as there was a lot I convinced myself was wrong and I felt I was taking advantage. We remained friends for 3 years. 2018-2020. A few days ago they took their life. I received the phone alongside their parents. I hope i never feel this pain and guilt again. I think my love would have saved them.

    • Sorry for your loss.Do u have Venus opposite Pluto ? I Do and I experienced death of partners after the Relationship is over in strange ways as this ..I’m left with questioning should I have stayed with them and it wouldn’t of happened. It’s happened about 3 times after I was no longer with the person ..suicide, drugs, dui accidents it’s always something to make me feel horribly wrong about it.

  99. Only two men I’ve ever loved comitted suicide. My boyfriend killed himself by smashing his car into the wall. I was sixteen. 15 years later, my first love, first friend, best friend and soulmate commited suicide by overdose. My sanity was at risk. It was 4 yours ago. I’ think I’m done with love for this lifetime. I have natal venus opposition pluto. Furthermore, twice in my life I ended up on the court and got police protection from the guy I went ONCE for a date…So, I think getting a dog and few more cats would be the best solution for this lifetime.

  100. Well, this happened to trigger a transit of my husband’s sister’s boyfriend yesterday morning. My husband’s sister died. She had had health problems but yesterday morning, she just didn’t wake up. Her boyfriend has Venus at 23* Capricorn. We are all in shock.

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