I re-met a guy from my past earlier this year. We started talking and hanging out; we pretty much hit it off. I feel like he fulfills all of my needs and I truly think that he is the one. I recently told him that I am ready to commit and we have been completely honest about everything… but there’s been one thing on my mind that I am afraid to tell him.
My last long-term relationship ended pretty badly, with my ex-boyfriend wanting me back and refusing to stop pestering me. But right before we finally were able to break it off, I cheated on him with a mutual good friend. I feel awful about it and definitely realize my mistake. At the time, I was having serious problems with my own parents and family. They had decided to go overseas, so I am here alone & the guy whom I cheated with just happened to be a lending ear when my current boyfriend was not.
At any rate, I need to know how I should get over this blemish in my past. I love my current boyfriend so much, I don’t want to lose him. But I know that infidelity is something he will never tolerate. Any thoughts? Thanks for your help.
Worried & Confused
Yes, I have an opinion and will offer my advice on this but I am not sure you should take it. Because you are not me, and I’ll explain:
I don’t think you should tell this guy about your indiscretion unless he asks you directly and I have a lot of reasons for this.
Number one, this was an aberrant act on your part. It does not represent your character. It is something you greatly regret that happened in a moment of weakness and I think you’re suffered enough over it. I think you should just forgive yourself and put thing to bed for good.
And from his perspective… well if I was him, I would not want to hear about this. Seriously! I don’t need to know every little detail about my partner and I think you should consider this very carefully. Who will you be liberating when you spill this secret? Will it benefit him? Personally, I don’t think so. But this is my perspective! And I am not you with your four planets in Sagittarius.
Now Sagittarians are pretty obsessed with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. But there is such a thing as inflicting the truth on a person and I have a grand example.
Once I was on a date with a guy with a ring in his pocket. He was to propose to me that evening, but he was a Sagittarius rising big mouth and he wound up telling me all about this blow job he had once… () instead. And did I want to hear about this? No! I begged him to shut up! I was seeing pictures of the act in my head as he was talking, sure to negatively affect our sex life which I coveted, but he would not shut up and in fact chased me outside the restaurant continuing to pummel me with his truth as I tried in vain to escape.
So here’s the thing. You are you and you may just need to come clean to be you! But I am me and I am telling you that most people don’t need or want to see every freckle on your butt. So I say, spare him. If this story needed air, it’s got it. You told my blog, right? You have broadcast this now so perhaps this will allow you to let it go and move on to your happy future.
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