There is this man who has been leading me on for some time. At first I didn’t like him but he pursued me so much I became attracted. The catch? He told me has a girlfriend. So I pulled away but he KEEPS flirting with me, giving me puppy dog eyes and acting like he is in love with me. Yet he obviously loves his girlfriend more.
I don’t know what to do because I can’t stop thinking about him. I feel like he has really treated me unfairly. Should I just not even try and be friends?
I am baffled as to what you think this guy did that was “unfair”. I am also baffled as to why you think you’re so powerless. Let me read this back to you:
I didn’t like the guy, but he liked me so I liked him. But he likes someone else, so I didn’t like him, but he still likes me. So I like him terrifically and I don’t know whether to like him or not!!
Does that sound crazy to you? It sounds crazy to me, especially when the gal who wrote it is almost 30 years old!
Look. The guy is a flirt. If you think his puppy dog eyes are funny, let him make them. If not, tell him to “Take a flying leap, dipshit!” But for godsakes, get a grip.
People who “act” like they love you don’t love you. They are acting, remember? People who have girlfriends but engage other women are playing games on both ends.
As to whether or not you want to be friends, it’s entirely up to you. What is your standard, where friends are concerned? Does he meet them?
I’ll tell you what I really think. I think you have a Leo Moon and you like the attention and the drama. But Saturn is in Leo now and begs you to grow up with this stuff. I mean think about it. Are you going to be forty and have a man with puppy dog eyes? ::cringe::
“It’s not hard to make decisions
when you know what your values are.”
— Roy Disney
“… with the right value system,
making good short-term decisions
leads to good long-term results.
… I think that is the purpose of a value system.
We need to figure out the way to live
so that when we are in the middle of life
we ‘do the right thing’.”
— Ralph Johnson
“Temptation usually comes in through a door
that has deliberately been left open.”
— Author Unknown
“Of the thirty-six ways of avoiding disaster,
running away is best.”
“Wisdom is knowing what to do next;
virtue is doing it.”
— David Starr Jordan
hehe..go hobo girl!
Ooh Elsa. This one made me fall in love with you! haha.
Hey Wondering, I wonder about a guy with beautiful eyes too. He (probably) doesnt have a girlfriend now, but he had one back when I was sending him beautiful pictures of me to look at. He said “It doesnt matter where you get your appetite, as long as you eat at home.” He made me feel like junk. I have venus in leo and I wanted to be adored. I think I was, but I wasnt calling the shots. Women need to call the shots, cause most men dont live the way God intends. Wait for dog eyes to make a move, then stop him and ask him if he knows where he wants to be in 10 years and what kind of woman he wants to end up with. Make him wait until he begs you, like a dog, and he is at your mercy. Even then he may always be a dog. But thats how its supposed to be. Flaunt your power and use it wisely.
Wondering–he doesn’t sound like the kind of person I’d like to be friends with, myself.
If I were you, I’d enjoy the flirtation and not read anything into it. He finds you attractive, he gives you compliments and attention – all that feels good.
It doesn’t mean that he will leave his girlfriend or that he will be any good in relationship, or that you are ever going to end up together. Drop agendas, and just treat things at face value without reading any kind of future or commitmentp-subtext into it.
I flirt heavily, and think yes – I may be committed to the man I married- but this doesn’t mean that I can’t make other people in the world feel appreciated/liked/flattered.
I think it is especially hard if you are around this person a lot and you can’t drop him like a hot potato, like if he lives in your town and you can’t avoid him. And if you do avoid him, what unnecessary stress you bring on yourself. Of course, Elsa, you would probably know how to pull dropping people that are no good like a hot potato right? It’s hard because maybe, if it is a crush or something like that, this man will obsess you for a while and you might even think you’ve fallen in love with him. And then how do you run for the hills without being attached?