I’ve got Pluto stationing in hard aspect to my natal Mercury, where Mercury is a major planet in my world. I am loathe to say anything to anyone because people keep being damaged by my communications. I can figure out why this happened. once it happens but injuring them (or anyone else) was not my intention so it’s pretty gross. It’s like walking in a room and everyone faints because you smell so bad, but you had no idea there was an odor!
I think this happens from time to time, with a person like me. You can’t have Mars conjunct Mercury and not write or speak in a way that is abrasive or challenging at least some of the time but recently it’s been crazy. I keep saying or writing things will no ill intention whatsoever. Then people internalize the communication, random people in many cases, people I am not even addressing, and they wind up bloodied, laid out on the ground. Whaaaat?
I can’t blame these other people because I am the common denominator. But I can say it’s not a good feeling when the words you use, which you feel are regular or even innocuous, turn into poison darts in translation.
I am not sure what to do about this besides talk less. I’d also like to say for the record, that there is not person out there whom I would like to harm. I’m just not strung that way as my anger lasts about as long as a drop of water in a hot frying pan.
Have you ever had a period where you struggled to communicate?
I have transiting pluto conjunct my mercury, so some people have told me i sound more abrupt and defensive than i used to.
I feel like i can’t please everyone, so i would just rather be myself than worry about satisfying social norms.
It’s very difficult. I am operating (intellectually) on a base level level right now. Pigs are pigs, no lipstick.
I am going to try to channel this into something powerful, healing and helpful. Maybe I’ll succeed. 🙂
Getting fresh air and sports helps i noticed.
Tomorrow i am having an interview and i am already dreading how they’re going to perceive me. Even when i look at people i feel like some sort of laser, which cuts through their facade.
I also started one project, which requires deep research; i do it on my own, so it helps.
For example, now in my life… I am struggling to heard. This has been the week for HELL!
I have Virgo in Mercury and a Moon in Leo. I am experiencing a lot of – “pushback” from certain people… Anyone else experiencing this same opposition from loved ones?
I saturn conjunct mercury so it’s always a struggle.
I for one take what you say seriously and if I feel a twinge from it I ask myself why? What hit me in that and usually I see that it’s a trigger for me to work on something. Not you being nasty but me needing to address something..
And usually it’s something lit up in my chart that if you had typed the same words at another time they wouldn’t have made me twinge…
Elsa, I can so relate to what you are saying (I think! – these days, who knows??!!) I had responded before to your musing on Mercury and Pluto. I have Mercury in Aries, Pluto on my Asc, Scorpio on the 3rd. Throughout my life, it seems I have OFTEN said exactly the words that — if they don’t wound another — then they at least brush up or poke the other person’s deepest wounds. And I am not CONSCIOUSLY intending to do that! I emphasize consciously because I have come to believe, for myself, that I must be at some level unconsciously aware of the wounds and how to wound. And that is quite a responsibility to have. Hopefully, since I’m pursuing a degree in counseling, I’ll have the opportunity — especially with Pluto hanging out with me and my mind for awhile — learn how to use that ability to heal and not hurt.
I also feel that some want to get near the fire but when it’s hot, they have a problem.
Years ago I wrote about the FACT that if I were a man, I would be having people sign a consent before I got into a bed with them – it’s so common (at times) that people think I’ve victimized them.
It was Kobe Brant back then, that brought this up. I really think that girl consented to have sex with him. But then she found herself bent over being fucked by a huge, very powerful man and it overwhelmed her.
He said he was holding her down. “That’s how I do it,” he said…which was so stupid / innocent it had to be truth. It was news to him he was raping someone, see? That’s how he fucks!
Anyway, same with me. I am asked to be potent and when I am – wham!
Ultimately it’s about control. I am to be controlled but this is just not possible – I was raised by those Aquarians. 🙂
I do have Libra though. I hate strife so my remedy is to withdraw.
::periscope down:: while I research other ways to communicate.
I’ve struggled for years, as I would mention on the boards, and in some blog comments. I don’t have Pluto in aspect to Mercury, but I have had my t-square with Pluto included, and I have Pluto in my 3rd house now. I wondered if that was causing the depression to just get worse and worse, and for my reactions being so strong. I’ve been struggling to deal with it, and with my “new normal”.
And that’s why I was banned, even though I didn’t mean anything – although I know how one thing sounded to one person, that wasn’t taken as me taking something personally when I felt I was at my lowest, and just acknowledging that I thought nobody would really care. I thought everyone would be better off without me. That’s why I ended up calling a hotline, not only last October, but just before Christmas. I was trying to tell you that I could relate to some things.
Pluto co-rules my ascendant, and is in my 11th in Placidus in Libra. I have felt repulsive in ways, even if that wasn’t the case, for years, but I cast some blame on the a-holes who got me there in the first place, as a kid. I feel best interacting with people who know me well, people I can relax with, and in places like bookstores, where I can be around people without the need to actually interact. I’ve never wanted to be trouble, and have tried my whole life to avoid trouble, and it’s just horrible to be in either situation.
ELsa There are times when you say what i would not expect you to say considering that you are supposed to be helping people. You tend to have a go at those who are poor and need help from the government to survive. Its contradictory. Its quite frankly uncaring and shows a certain level of ignorance about the situation of the poor, and dare I say it arrogance.
If there was anything I could do without hearing or reading is from those who know everything about being poor without ever being poor themselves.
I am sorry elsa but I dont feel or know for that matter that its just not about the pluto/mercury contact that is at this time making you say things that could hurt others – you do it at other times as well.
Maybe and I am guessing that this contact has suddenly made you more aware that you could and or do say things that upset others. It has raised your awareness and or empathy.
“If there was anything I could do without hearing or reading is from those who know everything about being poor without ever being poor themselves.”
I don’t think you know who you’re talking to. I was a homeless teenager. I ate paper to fill my stomach when I was a little girl. I didn’t have shoes. I wore a PE suit (outgrown) every day all summer long because I did not have any clothing.
Seriously, you’re off base here – far, far, far off base.
ps – I am not surprised that I say things you would not expect when your definition or belief of who I am is so egregiously wrong.
I was talking to someone yesterday – the fact is, you would be hard pressed to find another American who grew up with less than I did, and includes every ghetto in this country and all of Appalachia.
I understand if you don’t like me but rethink the idea that I am ignorant about poverty.
I have Mercury in a T-square with Uranus/Saturn and have had many periods during which I struggled to communicate.
I can absolutely understand your feeling about talking less, and the above comment illustrates this perfectly.
Then why are you so inclined to put those down who are poor and need help?
Oh man, sorry Elsa about that “personas” comment calling you uncaring, selfish, ignorant, arrogant.
What the hell are you talking about, persona?
I am not saying I dont like you – I dont know you – but there are times when your attack on those who cant help themselves rankles.
Persona if you have such an issue, perhaps you should read elsewhere. Personally you are offending ME with your rude and incorrect comments!
entirely read what i wrote – dont cherry pick.
Holy fuck. Talk about cherry picking. What are you doing?
It’s not cherry picking. These are your words:
“You tend to have a go at those who are poor and need help from the government to survive. Its contradictory. Its quite frankly UNCARING and shows a certain level of IGNORANCE about the situation of the poor, and dare I say it ARROGANCE.”
Again, what are you talking about? As in examples?
@Kashmiri – my comments are not incorrect. If you care to look through the comments over the past you will see where i coming from. Its no attck on you and was never meant to be an attack on elsa – just an observation.
You come here to her website and call her ignorant, arrogant and uncaring – yes that is an attack.
An unsubstantiated slanderous attack. You’ve provided no examples and frankly owe her an apology.
Your observation that I am ignorant about poverty is off base. Since your attitudes are formed around that bit of misinformation, do you not think you might want to take some time out to reevaluate?
So, how long have you been reading this blog? I’ve been reading since 2006 and think you are wrong. Period.
Unless you have been reading longer, it is fair to say I have read a hell of a lot more comments than you have and you are wrong.
I have been the recipient of Elsa’s generosity more times than I can count.
You are free to be delusional if you want re. Elsa attacking the poor. Knock yourself out–you obviously need someone to shit on today, yourself.
Elsa’s big fat uncaring ignorance LOL:
@ jilly it is cherry-picking when you dont take into account he whole post though – just a paragrapgh. How did I end the entry?
Its seems that you people take what i wrote out of context and turned it around to make of it what you wanted.
It was never an attack. If it was an attack it would have been a lot lot worse.
@Persona, Are you new here? Otherwise, how could you not realize that Elsa grew up in extreme poverty and went to work at a very young age to elevate herself.
IMO Elsa is very supportive of people who want to better themselves.
Bye, persona. Hope you enjoyed your little bait session.
And thats what is so remarkable – if elsa grew up in extreme poverty why she puts those down who are in poverty.
And not everyone who is in poverty can better themselves – no matter how much they would like too. And I suppose its for these people I feel for.
@kashmira – and you also taking out of context and making what you want – again read the whole entry.
I’ve gone from ignorant to remarkable. 🙂
I’ll take it! 🙂 🙂 🙂
You still have not given a single example of Elsa putting down people in poverty.
You are delusional or are a troll.
I will read nothing after I see you spelled my name wrong. Lecturing us on reading carefully and you can’t even get my name right? LOL
I think I better keep my Mercury opposite Pluto mouth shut before I say anything deeply hurtful.
Elsa knows I’m poor and why it’s been hard for me to work (as with Jilly and her severe health problems) – and I too have been the silent recipient of her behind-the-scenes generosity.
You seem to have a problem with English, persona: your posts above are in most cases inarticulate to the degree they are barely comprehensible. If you were better able to understand the language, and read her past posts with care, you’d know that Elsa is only harsh on people who are or play poor when they have a choice to be otherwise – ie people who expect to live off others and have no moral compunction about doing so
If Elsa has a fault or rather an Achilles Heel in regard to her Mars/Mercury, it’s that she sometimes takes offence where none was meant because her M/M are so over-sensitized now by all the attacks on her. So she sounds off in retaliation, then forgets all about it – while the poster in question often flounces off in a huff! I’ve seen this happen several times…
Your comments above certainly are an attack on Elsa; and since she’s the hostess here they display a gross lack of manners, quite apart from being plain wrong which makes the attack even less acceptable. I think you need to adjust your perspective – in several regards
Gotta be a troll.
I have a natal square between Mercury and Pluto and Scorpio Saturn. Being misinterpreted happens a LOT! I’ve learn to just shut up and say my pieces in private to myself. Although my Mercury sextile my Moon so I can be a good listener but I’ll definitely censor what I saw because it takes forever to make someone understand what I really think.
And now that Neptune will conjunct my Midheavean soon well hello hall of mirrors!!
@jilly – I would need some time to look through elsaelsa history of threads.
@kasmira – really – ouch – rush me to the burns unit – and yes that is me having a go at you.
@elsa – ignorant to remarkable – where did you see that – I wrote “And thats what is so remarkable – if elsa grew up in extreme poverty why she puts those down who are in poverty.”
Do any of you read what is written – completely read??
This was a planned attack. So says my gut.
Maybe it’s eccentricvirgo, back from the dead! LOL
Persona, it’s folks like you that epitomize what the aspects of human beings that I loathe. Perish the thought that my Sun-Neptoon conjunction ever gets me to what dumm hell you’re at.
It’s still early over here, but you get the Meta Troll Award of the Day.
This is why I shut up sometimes… Being misinterpreted and all!!!
Gotta love Pluto Mercury!
I like it when you dig deep. I can understand it is not a comfortable position but you’ve mined some incredible hard-won insights. And there are very few people like you – left standing – who are willing to share these insights too.
Persona’s comments are so off-base if not (unwittingly) eye-opening. Neptune anyone?
Well I have enjoyed this immensely. ::burps::
Okay, persona changed to a proxy ip to post this stuff. However, Mercury Pluto can easily penetrate that shit so I’m blocking now… 🙂
You lot have made an argument out of nothing – if anything has been orchestrated it has to be this attack on myself. I wrote nothing wrong – it was not an attack – just an observation.
The real question is why have you lot misconstrued what i wrote and then proceeded to attack me on what is a faulty premise devised by yourselves.
I have done nothing wrong. You lot have decided to make an issue out of it.
I hope you enjoyed it immensely.
And how importent do you lot think you are anyway. Put him on your ignore list !! really – so painful. As if you lot are that imporant to my survival.
Get over yourselves.
Oy. This post and the comments sparked a way too long for the comments entry…So, I’m placing an excerpt here. Am going to think ver (but not overthink) the value of placing the full text on the boards…
[snip] Sometimes being misunderstood or taken out of context is so daunting that I start to doubt myself, my motivations and my place at the table. But ultimately I am confident in the self-knowledge that I’m not a shit-stirrer nor a hurtful, destructive or meanspirited person.
And just because my ideas and opinions may not be in vogue or “pc”–and especially that my ideas may sometimes be complicated and complex–does not make them fallacious or invaluable. In some/many instances, it might make them all the more salient, frankly.” [snip]
Yes. Most of my life. I’ve had Neptune opposing Mars-Mercury in the 8th for the longest time, plus I am generally not clear, so yes, I’ve had a long period where I struggled to communicate. Currently, it’s getting easy aspects from Pluto.
It’s more my problem than theirs to be clear enough.
There have been many times I have injured people without intending to, and it’s never a good feeling. The best I can do is be aware of it or what can happen and be very very clear in my intentions. Because I’ve expressed myself and my intentions clearly, what they choose to do/believe is up to them. I still feel bad when they don’t believe me though. I do my best to make amends and I really do sympathize with their injury, but that’s really all I can do. I’ve apologized, clarified my intentions, and felt for them and at some point that has to be enough.
So, we are a lot? Can we all get jacket’s with our names on it and stuff.
Persona, when you walk into a party and spit on the host chances are there are other guests who will get offended.
Anyway, about this Merc to Pluto aspect. Ya reckon it might draw some verbal attacks? Maybe?
Yes – I have this natally – pluto square mercury, and when saturn was transiting my moon it was like every third word out of my mouth was misinterpreted.
I would put this experience down to saturn in libra.
I had to learn how to hold my communications close – like it or not.