My Boyfriend Talks About His Ex-Lovers

Capricorn capricornio

Dear Elsa,

I’ve fallen madly in love with a Pisces six years older than me, but with a lot more experience.

The real bad thing is that we’ve become close friends and confident enough for him to tell me everything about his past, present and future girlfriends. I sometimes get quite jealous but always try to hide it. He acts like he doesn’t notice it, but I feel he knows, but doesn’t want to face it.

Question is am I wasting my time? Will he ever make any “movement”?

Thanks a lot,
Capricorn Girl Waiting
Argentina

Dear Waiting,

I am sorry but I think this man has made his “movement”. He has decided to tell you all about these other women. And though it is possible he may want to form a relationship with you, I think it’s doubtful.

Men (and women) often talk about their various entanglements with the opposite sex as a way to communicate their lack of romantic interest in a person. Basically they want to be “friends” and this method creates distance.

But what specifically bothers me about this guy is you say he knows you are uncomfortable but he continues to talk about these other women and that makes it very clear to me he feels his interests trump yours.

I am very sorry but I think you should cut your losses and look elsewhere. Because a man who is interested in you will talk about you. He will also make a move…

I’m sorry and good luck.

 

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Comments

My Boyfriend Talks About His Ex-Lovers — 9 Comments

  1. I think my only issue with this is that she hasn’t said anything to him. Yes, it’s a bit shady that he continues to speak about his past, but as a Pisces, I know it’s also a defense mechanism. If I am unsure about someone, but I like them enough to confide in them, I will distance myself to avoid rejection.

    Also, I need set boundaries, and if I were in a situation like this, I would want her to tell me that talking about my exes makes her feel uncomfortable, that she likes me more than the friendship that I have her comfortably stowed in to save my self the excess pain of getting overly attached. Because, yes, we may know what we’re doing is making someone uncomfortable, but we’re also prone to a bit of romantic paranoia.

    Plus, communication is key in any relationship, romantic of otherwise, and if she can’t set boundaries, if she doesn’t draw a line in the sand, then she shouldn’t be upset when he tromps all over it.

    If after speaking to him, if they are indeed as close as she says, he continues, then yes, I suggest backing off and moving on.

    Just my two cents

  2. Hi Elsa,

    I had sent you the q about the pisces man. Well… you were absolutelly right!
    After i told him about my feelings gently, he kind of back off scary(???)at first after a couple of weeks of complete silence, he started the pattern again as if nothing ever happened… so i may have to move on as Daeshii said.

    Thanks a LOT

  3. I know a Pisces who does the same thing. He hasn’t had past lovers but he likes to talk about other girls. At first I was hurt because I believed that he didn’t like me at all and I tried to move on. But then I realized it is to make me jealous and it is his way of breaking the ice to get close to me. I found this out after this girl he talks about doesn’t even exist but he made her up so that he can make conversation. I didn’t confront him about this. Pisces guy I know lives in his imagination likes drama and likes the feeling of being wanted. I see what he was wanting me to do…to come to him and show that I care maybe throw a tiff. I know that he likes me because he’s always wanting to come to my house or be in my space ie car, be around my things and says I am distracting when I am around. Also his body language doesn’t lie there is sexual energy there. If I am around at his job he stops working and hangs out with me no matter what the cost. Also when I stayed away he kept asking me why I don’t come over like I used to. I think that Pisces is passive and doesn’t make the moves so he wants you to make some of them but he can be rejecting too when it backfires. He’s always asking me ‘Did you call me?’ Like he was expecting me to and being a bit old fashioned I keep saying no. I have a feeling that you have to be a sensitive person but also someone who will just drop everything and follow him. I think Pisces is shy but very romantic.

  4. Hey. About the whole Pisces Capricorn deal….I am in a similar situation. I’ve been friends with this one Pisces male since I was 10 years old. And as we’re getting older, we’re getting closer. I love his company. his sense of humor and other things about him. Though, we are on two different ends of the spectrum.

    Recently, our friendship boundaries have been flippant between friends and lovers. Though, there are certain complications afoot. This year alone, we’ve spent more time together hugging, kissing, talking, laughing…than we’ve ever spent together. I’ve been conflicted all at the same time in a blissful state of mind.

    I’ve fallen in love with a Piscean before..It was my pisces guy’s friend; and it was the worse thing that ever happened to me. He was just always too shy to tell me he loved me, so we never dated.

    Moving on, I think what you’re Pisces is doing is testing the waters, trying to see exactly how you feel by stating facts, opinions and other things that have to do with other females. Let him know, because Pisces are funny creatures. He may know, but he may know subconsciously. Same thing happened to me.

  5. I am so happy that I found this blog!

    I, also, am a Capricorn woman who is crazy about a pieces man! I do not know what to do.

    My story goes as follows: He was my older brother’s childhood friend and so I’ve known him since I was I diapers and always had a crush on him until the age of 10. We then moved to a different country and lost touch for more than 20 years. 4 months ago, we found each other on the internet. To catch up, we chatted, spoke on the phone & even exchanged photos many many times, almost daily! He once called me long distance at 2am, during which I asked him if he was dating someone, his answer was vague, he said that he had a comfortable arrangement with someone but it was not serious. He refused to go into details. Almost daily, we’d send each other messages with our favorite songs, something I took as a form of mild flirtation!

    Our chats were long, twice weekly on average, and through them I got to see that he is the same adorable person I always liked, and much more. We even talked about meeting soon!

    For 2 weeks now he has not been online and he halted all forms of communication! I know that I am not the reason for his odd behavior, since I never gave him reason to worry! I showed him that I cared and kept things warm & pleasant without being overly enthusiastic!

    Now I miss him and miss his songs! He really means a lot to me! The past months were lovely just by having him around. Now it’s all quiet & sad. I wish I knew what is happening with him.

    Being a typical Capricorn, I uncomfortable about pushing him to talk to me. I hurts to lose him, and now I’m trying to keep him out of my mind but to no avail. I miss him

  6. Hania…Let’s get this straight right now.
    Okay. Pisces are funny creatures as I stated before. & this is a Pisces guy. It’s even worse because he’s a guy. You know they don’t get their heads out of their asses until at least the age of 40! Well, many of them at least. Okay..they Pisces guy that I was talking to? He’s doing the same thing. He’s been through a lot of terrible and sometimes okay relationships, but I feel as though he doesn’t know how to deal with me sometimes.

    We were friends before the lovey dovey stuff; & i want us to stay friends, but he’s been kinda distancing himself away from me. I’m unsure as to why; but sometimes I think he’s afraid that our relationships are gonna mean anything.

    Anyway, I think the deal with your guy; is that there’s somebody else and it’s more serious than he let on. Trust me, love. Males do this no matter what sign they belong to!

    A Taurus did it to me! It hurt me to my soul! Because we had so much chemistry, that if we had decided to get together, there would be no breaking up!

    I’m kinda starting to feel that my Pisces is going to do the same thing yours has done; but I don’t want him to because we still have a history of a friendship behind us, along with a recent romantic history. I don’t want our friendship to go away; but I’m afraid it might.

  7. hiii..guys thank you i found this site.
    im capricorn…talking to a pisces man for almost two months,in net ofc.he seems to be funny..yeah he likes to talk more sexy thing.Since we talked?we used to do offlines thing…text…and once call.We used to talk every friday to sunday..his time late 5hours from my time and i have work from mon to fri so i cant stay late night to wait him.Well,he said he really likes me..he likes to talk to me..and even hoping to see me..actually his coming next month here in my place..then we will meet to see if we can be more than friends..but honestly lastime that we talked..we talked more than friends..he shown me everything,but i just only shown him me in two piece..and now,,i felt that i did a wrong thing..as were just friends…well,i agree that theyre always in drama.His grandma died and he seems to be cold..but still tried to log in and say even a short hi to me.Im flattered with his time,hes the man that we will inform you where he’l go..and i would agree about him falling to a married woamn bec his ex was a divorce woman with 2children.Im sad.i dont know if ill still continue this thing?or cut it?he said hes afraid to fall inlove again..and either me……:-(

  8. hey, i am in kinda same problem.
    i am definitely falling for a pieces man and since i am a capricorn, i know there is a hige level of compatibility between us. we used to keep on flirting with each other. and when we met finally with eachother, i was so nervous and so was he. i could sense that. n when we were alone he was hinting me the things we flirted for. and after our meeting, i defo felt for him and i couldn talk to him. he is having his UNI and work as well so he is bg right now and we are being unable to catch up together but i feel like he likes me too but yea maybe not. he is not initiating things and being a girl i don’t want to. please help me, how can i make him talk to me or to know whether he feel for me or not.

  9. Always a sad day for a Capricorn Woman and Pisces man that belong together and just can’t find each other. I’m 21 and I’ve known this guy for half my life. Before we were friends and when we were together, we were together. But I fell, and I fell hard and I see him trying to meet me hallway but he can’t. He has said so many things that keep me holding on and I don’t know what to do. So these twos are supposed to be together but it’s always so hard and they can’t.

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