The soldier and I were talking about some scantily clad girl who showed up in one of his classes one day.
“If you were in there you’d have gone nuts,” he said.
“If you were staring at her, you’re right. But so what? How about I’m with you and some guy comes in and my eyes drift off you and I openly stare at his crotch? You know. I just stare right at it?”
“Well I’d be pissed off. I’d do the same thing I did when you danced with that guy when we were kids. I’d do something, that’s for sure.”
“Well there you go. I think men are way more fragile than women when it comes to this. If a woman on a date with a man stares at another man’s crotch, the man she is with is going to have a hard time recovering from it because they have no conditioning the way women do. Women hold men together all the time.”
“May be some truth to that,” he said.
Do you agree? Who has the fragile ego? Men or women?
pictured – Venus and Mars by Sidney Harold Meteyard. Oil on canvas
i don’t think of it as an ego issue. i think of it as a manners issue. if i am out with a man, it’s simply inconsiderate of either one of us to be gawking at someone else with that sexual energy. you know? rude. it’s just rude.
yes, men and women are conditioned differently. and women are trained, largely, to build up a man’s ego. i think it’s probably hard having a penis! they have thier one penis, and if it doesn’t measure up in some way, they can’t do so much about it. they have to worry, is this woman going to want a different penis? is this penis enough for her? will a new and better penis come along? women don’t have that stress. men seem to want vaginas attached to women that are nice to them, and don’t make their lives more complicated. men want vaginas they can trust. women don’t have to be born with a capable vagina, or one of a certain stature. they have more control over it.
or maybe i have no idea what i’m talking about and have gone off the deep end. ha!
Men are more fragile for sure. I have never gone out with a man that didn’t at some point stare at another woman. But I stare at the posters in Abercrombie. 😉
I think it would be the rare man that even noticed their woman was staring at another guys crotch. Women dont tend to be as blatant about it as guys, and I dont think guys watch their women that close.
I agree with Goddess, I think it’s more about manners, respect for eachothers feelings and sensitivity. People in a relationship get along best when they can agree on how to handle situations like that. If I were married to someone who didn’t have control overhimself, well I wouldn’t have married someone like that in the first place unless I wanted to suffer. I don’t like to suffer, so after the first guy I ever dated, I made sure to stick to guys who had some degree of self awareness.
Men! They just don’t say it.
Of course men are more fragile. They are the ones that have their most sensitive and vulnerable parts hanging outside. If they couldn´t work up loads of testosterone to compensate, they´d be too scared to crawl out from under the bed…
And many of them have severe issues concerning their hair, especially when they´re balding. Drama!
As for staring – it´s just subconscious most of the time, I guess. They´re genetically trained to keep an eye on moving objects, and there are quite a few on a woman´s body. So I don´t mind, as long as they don´t drool. I myself find male crotches rather boring visually, so I´ve got no reason to stare anyway.
men. there’s no question that they’re way more inclined to get very upset and bitchy if his woman’s looking at or dealing with another man.
Men staring – ok it’s hard wired & it’s true they think about sex a gazillion times more often then women but they KNOW all that, so like goddess says its a matter of politeness for a guy to pay attention to where his gaze will wander off!!! Gimme some respect! I’m convinced that it’s very easy for a men to feel emasculated because they really want to be heroes (well someone’s hero’s) and small criticisms or gestures can hurt them a lot more — whereas women dont take criticism the same way at all. Women can take it and guys, well you need to package it: goddess qualitatives are right on: you gotta give it to them in a simple, nice uncomplicated way. Except if they drool while starring of course. Who wants to be in such company anyway?