“…How do you defend yourself against bad energy that is not so obvious or just a bad energy of other people in general (without taking such “dramatic” decisions like cutting them off)? We were such good friends for long period of time. What is interesting this is not the first time I’ve done this to people. I’ve had bad luck throughout the life with people being jealous of me and I’ve paid a price because of that many times.
How do you deal with bad energy of other people which you did not cause or provoke, but still has a negative effect on you?”
Knowing I have a packed 8th house, a gal in a similar circumstance sent me this note which I condensed and edited for clarity. This gal has just amputated two 10-year-long friendships because her friends were knocking her down in ways that are plausibly deniable. Gaslighting, basically. She could see through it. For the sake of discussion, let’s assume she’s read the situation correctly.
She seems to be asking if this is just how it’s going be or how it’s got to be. I think it probably is but I’m willing to explore this and ask others to weigh in.
To answer her specific question, ultimately, you defend yourself by amputating. So what she’s really asking is can you live with this?
You can live with it but if you have a choice, I’m not sure why you would. If you work with someone like this, you’re stuck. But if you’re involved socially with someone who hates you (they often don’t realize it), and you can get away from them, I would.
Yes, you can use their negative energy! But there is no shortage of that. It’s everywhere! Why invite it in? Why bring it to your house?
I think 8th house people have to get comfortable with the idea they make other people uncomfortable. It also helps to realize you don’t want a million friends.
This is challenging if parts of your chart are “social”. I’ve got this problem, myself. But the fact is, you’re going to appear shadowy if not flat-out dark to a significant percentage of people. You can’t control them. There is no cure! I mean, they start out liking you, or your veneer or whatever, but your actual self disturbs them. I’ve been through this a billion times!
Eventually you realize you’re going to have just a few friends. TRY TO KEEP THEM.
Over time, you realize you’ve got to contain quite a bit or it won’t be possible. I’m sorry but this is what I’ve learned.
Can anyone else weigh in?