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Relationship with someone who has saturn in 7th house

SunnyScorp
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(@sunnyscorp)
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Hi guys Smile

This is actually my first post here in this group. I really need to say thank you to Elsa because her blog is fantastic, she has such a different view on astrology as the other modern astrologers out there and it really soothes my soul. 😊 

Anyway, I have some worries actually. My boyfriend has saturn in 7th house. He is a Taurus sun, leo moon, cancer asc. And I am worried because all they say about these people is that they are serious, reliable and kind of demanding. That they need someone grounded, hard working and emotionally rational. Someone with tons of experience, probably older( i am 7 years younger than him).

Well, first of all, I have no planets in earth sign except neptune in capricorn. My saturn is also debillitated (aries retrograde 9th house).  I am a scorpio sun and moon with leo rising.

I  think I have a good enough level of maturity. For my 24 years of life even too much.(I dare to say even more than him since he lacks awareness a lot) I have dealt with so much abuse in my life and I am healing a lot of that. But I certainly lack stability since I still dont feel safe kind of and I am also not very grounded person, not focused too much on a material plane and I also dont like to hold my emotions back.

Is that going to be a problem? Tears  

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Elsa
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 Elsa
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Welcome, SunnyScorp!  Please check the "saturn in 7th" tag here:

https://www.elsaelsa.com/all-astrology-topics/

 

Also, "Venus Saturn".

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Also, the age difference is VERY common with people who have Saturn mashed with their Venus in any way. He does. 

I also have a workshop on this (but it for $)

https://www.elsaelsa.com/product/how-to-find-your-true-love-soulmate-with-venus-saturn-workshop-transcript/

 

Good luck!

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SunnyScorp
(@sunnyscorp)
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@elsa Thank you   Scorpio smiley Smile

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dolce
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My dad has this and he's been married to my mom since 1978. I can't say he's been a perfect husband but he's not going anywhere!

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sophiab
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Saturn in 7th, one possible outcome of many: a person may experience insecurities relating to their sense of self, self image, but project these onto others in close relationships until they can experience these insecure, fearful feelings as their own. The other partner would ideally be strong in their sense of self in order to recognise the true source of the anxious projections and recognise and contain them. When both are swayed by the insecurities, the relationship is challenged. This has been my experience of my partner having Saturn transit his 7th house. I think if you can work through this together with love, patience and kindness, it is a very binding aspect. 

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SunnyScorp
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@sophiab thank you for your reply. And this is excatly what I am experiencing. I recognize his insecurities but I can’t be rational in some cases because I am still working through things on my own. And I also have saturn transiting 7th house right now and I feel like our relationship is challenged immensly.

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sophiab
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@sunnyscorp From my own experience, it's really hard to stay rational, I think because the insecurities are irrational in nature so even with great awareness your mind starts bending after a while.

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BellaDonna
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Posted by: @sophiab

a person may experience insecurities relating to their sense of self, self image, but project these onto others in close relationships until they can experience these insecure, fearful feelings as their own.

^this has been my experience with Venus Saturn types...

Posted by: @sophiab

The other partner would ideally be strong in their sense of self

although I have found this ^ while ideal tends to trigger the insecurity/projection even more so... they are attracted to what they fear (strength)

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sophiab
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@belladonna very interesting observation! Perhaps the Saturn person attempts to bring the other person into experiencing their level of insecurity, with Libra 7th - seeking balance. Communicating their worries by making them real for the other person.

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BellaDonna
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@sophiab I've found in the instances that I've attracted Venus Saturn types that my strength is what they are attracted to yet it's also what scares the shit out of them (triggers those Saturn fears insecurities) .. but I'm Plutonic so maybe that's all it is

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SunnyScorp
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@belladonna I also attract people with saturn aspects. And I wonder if it is because of my heavy scorpio placements because I litteraly have no earth

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BellaDonna
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do you have a lot of Saturn contacts or a Venus Saturn signature? I have Mars Chiron opposite Saturn in the 2nd... and all the men in my life that failed me/were unavailable emoitonally all have heavy Capricorn, so Saturn types have helped me work out my own self-esteem issues ... their fears have often pushed me away which became me reliving a lot of those wounds, but an opportunity to accept and try to heal them

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SunnyScorp
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@belladonna I have loose orbs from venus, mars and ascendant to saturn..They are in trine but it is a 8 degree trine..so I feel like this is not important in my chart or at least I never deemed it as important. But I have only saturn in my upper hemisphere..maybe that tells something? I don't know yet much about this..

Hmm..this sounds so similar to my case

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BellaDonna
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@sunnyscorp if you read elsa's posts about Venus Saturn, there's a tendency to reject before being rejected... my experience with this is that I drew those types to me because of my own issues of self-worth due to the emotionally unavailable men in my life

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MediumMarie
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I can relate! I am with a man who has Saturn in the 7th house (I'm 7 years older than he), and I have found it's like breaking a wild horse--two steps up, one step back.

Grounded for me has meant NOT to give in to his rattily commitment level. I just ignore it and act like everything is fine until he moves to a more stable place. It's been a great growing experience for me to NOT be the wobbly one Smile

Don't get in a desperation spiral by uncoupling because you think he is about to. Just stand your ground! We are on year 7 and Saturn sticktoitiveness has meant it's gotten better every year. Someone said that Saturn 7H stays; they do. Make sure you aren't the one twisting off Smile

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SunnyScorp
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@mediummarie We came to the conclusion yesterday that it is the best thing for us to break up. The main reason in his opinion is that we always fight. My opinion is that he is too controlling, independent and doesn't know how to make compromises within relationships. He is very fixed in his mindset and he seems like he doesn't want to work on trivial relationship problems.. very immature of him... He didn't get nothing from his saturn return 2 years ago..he just keeps stumbling upon same mistakes

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SunnyScorp
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Right now saturn is transiting my 7th house so maybe Saturn just wants to show me the way..and that is sadly the end I am afraid

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MediumMarie
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@sunnyscorp You are 24. The end is a lonnnng way off! Take away the positives and learning and growth, and move forward--regardless. You always have YOU. Best of luck, SunnyScorp!

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SunnyScorp
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@mediummarie thank you Marie😊

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sophiab
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@mediummarie I needed to hear this advice, it resonates so strongly with my experience of my partner. He seems to have Saturn 'storms' recently where the rattling gets really intense. I see myself taking the position you are describing and it does work but man, I have to hold my nerve and it can be exhausting! It's good to read of a similar experience and positivity.

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