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dating someone new & he invited me to meet his friends for the 1st time (anyone care to weigh in)


BellaDonna
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I am seeing someone new, and he's got a heat-seeking missile that Elsa speaks of and that which my Aries Moon-Venus needs... but I am not sure if I am staying in this location. I came here to wait out my Neptune Saturn transit and get a preview if this is a place I could eventually settle or not. We also have a language barrier that's not that bad because I am close to fluent, but is still something that could block deeper intimacy along the way. 

His interest in me and his attraction to me has been very clear from the beginning and he's older than me (soon 41) which I have found is very grounding for my Plutonian depth (I'm mid 30s). It filters out a lot of the power/ego stuff that often occurs in my dynamics with men, especially early on. So, I feel comfortable with him for the most part (thus far) and I definitely like the way he makes me feel - wanted and appreciated. 

I don't feel like I'm guessing with him or games are being played. It feels like a healthier connection than I am used to. But, he does have a very full life, so there's pressure there in terms of getting more serious with him or not. Honestly, with all of my fire and freedom-loving planets, this whole being the stable Taurus that wants to build a life with someone is new for me. I've thought that's what I wanted but have acted unconsciously otherwise for years. 

He's divorced with two young children and owns a business. He makes time for me but he doesn't have much. I came from a divorced family and my father remarried and started a new family quickly. Fortunately, I don't think I want my own kids anyway, but the idea of possibly being the new woman in his life, I'd take very seriously in consideration of the kids. It's so new that I don't have to think that far ahead yet, but it does cross my mind. This may all be a bit presumptuous anyway because I am still not even sure if I'm 100% there myself, but I am happy to attract a healthier situation. 

I have felt a little vulnerable lately, it's a pattern to put my guard up. I am doing my best to stay conscious and open, but when we first went out, the only red flag to me was that situations from the past with other women seemed to come up. Nothing serious, it was more just the fact that he so comfortably mentioned it at all, and it's just not something I would do. 

ie: he was talking about a trip he took to NY, and such and such happened because - he was with a woman, and she got sick. On the logical surface, it's a fact of the story, but it just didn't seem appropriate given that it wasn't the only one either. 

He invited me to meet his friends for the first time tomorrow in celebration of his birthday so I'm a little nervous.

I'd love to hear if anyone has something to weigh in on with our charts. 

Our composite has Pluto ASC 6 degrees apart, which I have a tight Pluto ASC natally so that definitely caught my eye... 

He knew his rising sign but I didn't feel super confident on the exact to the minute birth time... but when I pulled the chart he is Libra Rising and I definitely think the rising is accurate, but I don't know if it's for sure exact degree/time wise.

COMP

 

syn

 

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okscorpiogal
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I haven't pulled up the charts, so I am just commenting "off the top of my head".  You said he had 2 children.  Are they boys or girls or both?  I made a 2nd marriage to a man I thought was my soul mate (and he said he thought the same about me).  We both were divorced from long term marriages.  I had 3 grown kids, 2 boys and a girl.  He had 2 grown kids - both girls.  I had been seeing a Psychologist for several years due mainly to trauma from Marriage #1 and not wanting to rebound into the same situation.  Therapist advised me NOT to marry him or any man with just daughters, that the daughters would always come first!  I talked to soul-mate about it, and he confirmed that his daughters would always come first.

I started retreating from him.  At that time he was working and living in another state due to the downturn of the oil and gas business in our town.  I had sold my house and moved into his in preparation for our marriage.  I thought the 1st thing I needed to do was move out of his house!  I let him know I was getting ready to put a contract on another house.  He back-pedaled and convinced me I would always come first (I should have gotten it in writing!).  We had reservations made at Lake Tahoe for a room and marriage arrangements.  He said please, let's go there for a vacation even if we don''t get married! 

Well, we got married, lived happily ever after for ten or so years, then Alzheimers started creeping in (his)!  He became very verbally abusive to me and started thinking one of his witchy daughters hung the moon.  Then right before 25th anniveersary, he left me to live with witchy daughter!  At that point, all I felt was relief, relief,, relief!  He is still alive, but I haven't talked with him since Dec.  Don't think he can use the phone or computer anymore.  Witchy daughter started charged our (husband and my) joint account $5,000/MO. for his room and board.  She and her husband were already rich!  My money will run out this year.  Fortunately, I am in a retirement place which will take care of me even when I have no money.  2 of my 3 kids are fine finanacially, but they have their own families, and I hate to rely on them.

Pardon this book instead of a short post (as  youo will see I can't say anything in 25 words or less!)

 

 

 

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