Just me?
HA! No, it's not just you. Not by a long shot.
@soup Thank you. I just can’t help but feel like a freak in pretty much every area, even though my logic says that I’m not that different.
@libra-noir Remind me to text you how many times I have been married 🤣 I have been with this one for a long time, but my life did not start out that way. My dad used to say... she fires them all. 🤣 One slight dick move, and I was gone. Poof. Not another word. I just left and never came back.
And not just romantic. 🤣
I am living like a hermit right now. I don't want a relationship with anyone .. I am burned to the ground with people. Sick of their shit 🤣 I know this is me more than anything, but my tolerance is low. I also realize my POV is tainted based on the shenanigans of the three witches of Eastwick over my parents' death... those paper cuts girls were way too extra.
You're a Libra. You are doing better than me. Everyone loves Libra! Me? I am the most hated one in the zodiac apparently. 🤣 A literal f'ng lunatic. 🤣
You are NOT a freak. Not even close.
@soup Thank you. I just feel very broken and I had hope that I would heal more by this age than I have. Sorry, I’m very in my sad, dark emotions today. The Moon is in my 12th.
@libra-noir I have been right here, and I understand what you are feeling. I get in those dark emotions. It hurts. Damn moon beats me to death once a month. I have moon opposite my whole stellium in the 4th, so I am moon all over the place. It's really gross. I cry.
I can be in the damn Target, and something will hit me, and the tears are running down my face like a nut. I can't even watch those dog commercials. I give everything I have away. I am a moving target for anyone that wants to bamboozle someone. I am trying to learn and do better but when it hits you it just does. This is a craptastic week for everyone. From what I understand by Thursday it will be total chaos.
My husband is back to shouting at someone again. He came out about 10 minutes ago and said can't anyone do the right thing? It's going to be a long week for him.
I should have left this morning to head home, but I don't want to deal with the Gem/Sag/Pisces people at home. It will be like a gang of them losing their poo all at once. So, I am pushing it back a little. I might wait till Friday 🤣
If someone graded me on relationships, I would get a big red F!
It's not just you.
I agree. Not just you. It's pretty much universal at this point. The schema we live in is not at all conducive to forming a happy, healthy relationship. You really have to want it, specifically and find someone else who wants the same thing.
If you can do this, it does work and years spin by (when married), really quickly.
I remember complaining about not knowing how to find a good man, and somebody said, "quit hanging with the wrong guys and the right guy will show up". I went solo immediately. It was a relief and I was genuinely happy to be solo for the rest of my life.
The next thing I knew (well almost), my husband turned up. I tried to push him away and when he finally left, I realized I missed him. We have been together ever since.
Also, every relationship before him was so frickin' HARD, and exhausting... but this one has been so easy and so rich. I never in a million years thought this would happen to me. I wish for it to happen to you.
@aspire Thank you aspire. I hope your wish goes to the ones who can help me.
I didn’t watch the Oscars but I follow Lenny Kravitz on instagram and saw that he performed this song. It sums up my experience.
What a beautiful song - of course the angels will hear it!! They are on it. 😇
No it’s not just you. I’ve been there. And after being in a relationship I went into hermit mode for 6 years . I wasn’t looking and I couldnt hear the clichés about how that perfect someone walks into your life while you don’t expect it.
But it is true! It happened to me, and I’ve been with him for 9 years. I’ve let go in the years of being single.
hang in there. I don’t know if you are in a relationship but I do know it’ll come when you’re ready . You won’t realize it at first but there he/she is.
I guess moon in the 12th can be hard. Mines is in the 1st, also not easy because my feelings were on display.
I wish you a stable and most loving relationship, it’s possible don’t lose faith!
BtW: I’m libra rising and moon
Big hug
Dahlia
@Dahlia thank you. I know people say that. I haven’t talked to a man in two years until recently. I haven’t been in a serious relationship for 14 years. There have been periods where I looked. There have been periods where I haven’t. I hear about it happening all the time to people and I see it. But I also see old maids. I guess I’m already one. I’m not trying to be contrarian or sound bitter. I’m happy for the people that happens to but I’m aware that lots of different scenarios could play out. I see people get together so easily. I see people who just remain alone. I see people who settle.
In my heart though and if I ignore all those negative thoughts…….I do feel that love will find me when I’m ready.
@libra-noir And what if you been bitter? It’s ok, you are only human. God knows I’ve been bitter about my love life! And life in general. But the key is I guess to have faith. And sometimes that’s very hard while looking around you. I see your point.
We all have wishes. I don’t know how old you are. But now at 43 I feel life is moving faster than ever, and it feels like I haven’t accomplished much. Guess that’s on transit Uranus ( my 8th) now opposing my Uranus in the 2nd.
and yes if you really look into your heart apart from the negative thoughts , you’ll find love on your terms. We all have the negative thoughts like I said at the beginning : you are only human!
Big hug
Dahlia
@Dahlia thank you for the encouragement. I feel better today.
Reminders to myself: I’m 42. Im actually the age that my mom was when she met the man that was right for her (her fifth marriage!!). I still get attention from men- maybe more than I used to! I went through A LOT. I grew up in an extremely controlling and abusive, alcoholic environment and then was in a relationship that mirrored that, then was/am a single mother who struggled with my own addiction. Now, I’m clean and sober, lead a spiritual life and help others recover from alcoholism. I do lots of inner work and have healed A LOT. I have to remember to compare myself to who I was, not to others. And also, I know that I pushed so many people away probably because I needed time alone to transform (Pluto moving through my first) so I shouldn’t allow myself a pity party when I play a part in all the events of my life. My own energy field/soul was probably looking out for me by giving me a private space to heal.
@libra-noir Wow im in awe. Your very brave have gone trough what you have gone trough. And i can only admire that!
And im so sorry to hear what you have been trough in your childhood also. I can relate, growing up with abusive mother and abusive siblings. It's been hard. And i had to work my ass off to come where im now. And im still not out of the woods yet. Still going to therapy doing lots of inner child healings. Also suffering from panic attacks. But im getting there. And you show me that people can change. Can get better.
You go Libra-Noir. It how do i say this? (English not my 1st language) Its admirable that you've become sober and did the work. My mom was an addict and she refused to get better or help herself. It broke us all. In different kinds of ways.
I as a Libra moon and libra rising often walk into people that try to take advantage of me. Recently . But im done, the old me who have let herself be used.
How wonderful that you made it this far. Thank you for bravely sharing your story with me. I appreciate that.
And i know for sure, that love will come!
What you described i felt and underwent that too. I was single, working , had my own beautiful cozy apartment. And i felt secure and better. I was independent and content. Not thinking about a relationship. In fact maybe i was a bit scared i don't know. Not consciously i guess. But there he walked into my life.
The most caring, the most unselfish and loving person. Nothing is too much for him. Always helping me out. And taking things out of my hands when im stressed or sad.
You deserve that too! Because becoming an addict was because of what you have been trough. Bless you heart and soul.
You'll get there i know for sure.
Dahlia
I didn't watch the oscars either but I just watched Lady Gaga do this powerful song and it made me think of you.