My Man Gawks At Other Women

Gemini christmas dogs

Elsa,

I am dating a man. I feel like I am just beginning to learn about myself as well as be vulnerable. We are in counseling; I have issues with him flirting and having so much energy on women when we go out publicly. He is very loyal and loving to me. It’s only when we go out socially. I am still with him because he says it’s not who he is, I am concerned that this is not true. I wish this didn’t bother me but it does.

I look at it like my bad habit that I just quit, smoking (I am three years into not smoking after 33 years). When he does this behavior in my presence, it feels like he is blowing smoke in my face – very disrespectful. When we are in the car he looks at every car that drives by him, as if he is hard wired this way and he is never going to change.

With what’s in my chart, is it possible for me to see this in a different way? I am not the flirty type. He has Saturn square his sun and moon; and squares my moon. He loves me very much and is willing; what can I do to help him grow past this behavior and what can I do besides tell him to not let it kick me in the chest. He has asked me to marry him twice. I am really concerned about this behavior.

Gemini Sun Aquarius Moon
United States

Dear Gemini,

When I read this I was baffled. Why would someone put up with this, I wondered. And then I look at the charts and all is explained. Since you’re a thinker and you know some astrology, I’ll take you through my thought process. It’s no better than yours, other than it’s detached.

You have a 10th house Venus in Cancer in exact aspect to Saturn and here you are stuck trying to grow up this baby. But how could he be a baby with Saturn square his Sun and Moon, I thought? That’s impossible. I decided I’d better look at his chart but I also wanted more information as to how you are standing this. And when I saw your Moon in Aquarius opposite Uranus, I figured that was it. Intellectually you don’t think this should bother you.

Then I pulled up his chart and sure enough: Saturn square the Sun and Moon in Leo… so he’s not a baby after all, he’s a child. ::Laughs:: And he has Cancer too, but mostly he looks like he really likes women, number one… and needs their attention desperately, number 2. In other words, he’s dependent which sort of works for Venus in Cancer…

But there is more to this story. Your man is a Sagittarius rising, with Mars in Sadge in close aspect to Uranus and guess what? No one is going to tell this guy what to do. He’s a walking contradiction. He’s an oppressed free person and since he refuses to oppress himself, it looks like that’s your job. Because guess what? It’s very simple.

QUIT GAWKING AT WOMEN!

So is he going to do this? The Magic 8 Ball says “Highly Doubtful”.
Are you going to learn to love riding in a car with a man staring at other women? “NO”.

How long will you put up with this? Unknown.

Congrats on the not smoking and good luck!

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