Cancer Frets Over Venomous, Difficult Gemini Girlfriend

Harvest Moon

Hi Elsa Elsa,

I’m pulling my damn hair out. I’m in a relationship with a Gemini and I’m a freakin’ Cancer. Ugh. I hate being a Cancer in this relationship!

I don’t know how to argue with her. She coolly spits out her venom while I lose it and flail my arms. She insults and lashes out every one of her fears on me. She is so damn stubborn, jealous, selfish and controlling.

She is scared of love and life and SELFISHLY proclaims her disappointments and my shortcomings. I work two jobs trying to save money to move back closer to her but she doesn’t see this! She thinks I am just “broke” all the time. Uhhh it costs money to save money. Hello?

But I forget. How silly am I? She needs to be spoiled and taken on lavish outings. And I’m supposed to know this already, even when she says she likes supporting my money saving. SHE DOESN’T.

She thinks my vague and indirect Cancer ways are equivalent to lying. Her possessive, jealous rages are insane and scary! They’re enough to cause an ulcer. I think I have one.

But… I am a Cancer. My claws are embedded deep and it’s tough to let go. My cancer tears are a deep well of worry.

How do I show a Gemini my heart and earn her trust?? There’s gotta be a way to make this work!??? What is the solution here!? Any advice????

Frantic and Fretting Cancer

Dear Frantic,

Yikes, man. You’ve got your hands full, don’t you? And apparently you like it. And I am not sure what I can tell you besides this is this gal’s nature. And yours.

By that I mean, she has Venus and Mars in Aries, so she is going to want to fight. She is not interested in wimps. And you may be a Cancer, but you have an Aries Moon, did you know? So what looks like “home” to you is… her! So sorry, hon.


And her Gemini Sun? Well you have Venus in Gemini. Isn’t that funny? So who do you love? This flighty chick!

Further, she’s a Virgo rising and what do you have in Virgo? One, two, three, four planets!! Ha ha ha ha!

And you are a Sagittarius rising and she has Sagittarius Moon and I guess you’re getting the picture here. Obviously there is a real affinity between you two. Some of these connections are nothing less than superb. However, the pathology is flying in both directions and it’s thick. It’s thick enough you’ll most likely need a referee (a therapist) if you want to make it long term. And while that is outside the scope of this blog, I can offer this quick diagnosis.

She has Jupiter conjunct her Sun and thinks she know the TRUTH. She also has a Sadge Moon and thinks she can sense the TRUTH. However, Gemini is Gemini (lies all the time) and Neptune is conjunct her Moon, a combination that is known to be evasive. And she may very well be projecting the lying thing, since this is what people with oppositions in their charts do! Live one side and project the other that is.

And you? Well you have a stellium in Virgo and you want to FIX everything. Including and especially this gal. And let me tell you something. Gemini doesn’t want to be fixed. It’s not interesting to them, okay? And if you bore a Gemini and you’re history.

Sadge likes being fixed even less if this is possible! Because Sadge is inflated, okay? They think they are GREAT to begin with…. so you see the problems here. And obviously they will persist unless both of you get your asses in gear.

Good luck.


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Cancer Frets Over Venomous, Difficult Gemini Girlfriend — 7 Comments

  1. Good luck, indeed, ’cause it sounds like you’re going to need it!

    My parents were another volatile Gemini/Cancer combo, but I can’t give any advice here. They imploded. Since it sounds like you love her in spite of her exasperating ways, I hope you two fare better. Bon chance!

  2. Uh-oh… hope not a break up…It is really hard to get over that ‘special someone’. I actually had tons of problems and no matter what I did or where I looked I was thinking of that very person. I suggest try reading and listening to music, it calms the soul. Try this book out, it really helped me -its called ‘Curing my Broken Heart’

  3. Dear Elsa,

    I am a Cancer woman (7/21/61 5:09AM)who has been in a three year relationship with a Gemini man (5/25/56 time? I use 12 noon)and although we have had blowouts related to his looking for others and deneying it when caught, for most of this time we have had a very loving caring relationship with much joy. I have read that Gemini often has a childishness about them. With him this is true in general. He loves to be treated like a little boy in a lot of ways. As he is growing older, and is very successful, I have noticed lately that he is more interested in younger women, yet he continually deneys this. Can you please tell me a little about our match with the dates and time I have provided, in the hope of sheding a bit of light on the relationship dynamics? I have stayed with him in spite of disappointments, like the cancer I am, along with the feelings of love and devotion that I can never get past. I love him, but I do not think he loves me in spite of his insistance that he does. He has a continual roving eye and has paid less attention to our relationship lately. I think he just wants to keep me around..probably for the assured sex and familiarity because he has done some things that have caused me a lot of pain.

    Hurt and neglected cancarian

  4. Just a couple of words…to the best of my experience being I Sun in Cancer, Rising Aries, Scorpio Moon, most geminis are simply not worth your time or your trust. They are LIARS and they are flimsy. I mean there is plenty of stuff a Cancer can endure, but a loving caring heart is wasted on such a person. Gemini should just know when to shut the f*** up. Even at work this persons have proved, time and time again, they can only actually care about themselves, and don’t mind making a fool out of YOU to get the upper hand, there’s not a single ounce of altruism in these souls. Sad thing, really, is that these are people who don’t know how to cope with their own emotions and are mostly cowards who try to use verborragy to illude others.

    Go for Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer, Capricorn or Virgo, these are more akin to your true self.

    I had a couple of geminian adventures…it’s only when you don’t give a sh** at all that they actually show interest. By the second week I had enough of their bullsh*t. The only thing I admire about them nowadays are their artistic endeavours, they have a beautiful creative side.
    They talk of trivial things during sex! I can’t think of a weirder way to mood out of it… 🙁 bah, ridiculous, childish persons mostly.

  5. Response to angry Cancer:
    You must have been with the wrong Gemini’s. I am a Gemini and I am no liar. In fact telling the truth gets me into trouble more than I can remember.

    I am certainly worth any bodies time and trust. In fact I have been Married going on six yrs to my Cancer wife.

    I have a family that I care for deeply, every single one of them.

    I am no coward! Never have been and never will be. Flimsy? Rock solid here and like I say you must have been with the wrong Gemini. Please just stop talking like you think you know something that you know nothing about. You must have gotten your feathers tattered up pretty badly from a Gemini to sound like that. Sorry for you!

    Yeah I talk dirty during sex but my wife loves it! I like to play around but I am no child.

    Me > Sun in Gemini, Venus in Cancer and Moon in Pieces.
    Wife > Sun in Cancer, Venus in Gemini and Moon in Cancer.
    Married 5, together 7 yrs and counting with two wonderful kids! Thank you very much!

  6. What can you tell me about his and my chart please? Pretty please…

    His. Mine.
    Sun. Pisces. Gemini
    Moon. Aquarius Sagittarius
    Mercury. Pisces. Gemini
    Venus. Aquarius. Aries
    Mars. Libra. Gemini
    Jupiter. Scorpio. Aquarius
    Saturn. Libra. Scorpio
    Uranus. Sagittarius. Sagittarius
    Neptune. Sagittarius. Capricorn
    Pluto. Libra. Scorpio
    Lilith. Sagittarius. Taurus
    Asc node. Cancer. Taurus

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