Virgo man dating Aquarius woman! Yikes! Help a guy out?
I wear my heart on my sleeve, am all about details, sometimes come off as judgmental to people who don't know me well (and even people who do), enjoy a lot of verbal and physical affirmation and reassurance and enjoy pairing off with someone into a stable, idealistic commitment. With all that being said, for some reason, I have happened upon an Aquarius woman who likes me (sometimes I'm unsure about this one, lol) for some reason that I have yet to figure out! When I look at the Aquarius personality it is evident that I continuously do things that are off putting for Aquarius. I'm also not like the typical Virgo in the sense that I am fast in a relationship. So this is another point of controversy.
Anyway, I'm really looking for pointers here because it seems like Aquarius develops attraction based on characteristics that are the opposite of what I am.
Here's a good example of a difficulty in communication that we have: I show interest in a conversation, activity or topic by delving into the details. My Aquarius lady seems to be directly off put by this. She'll respond kind of impatiently as if I'm not listening or something. Kind of like a, "who cares, that's not the point of the story". BUT, for me, if I just listen to the story and laugh and say "that's funny" or something like that then I feel like I'm being generic and might come off like I'm unengaged and don't care.
What kind of advice would you have for a sensitive, romantic, analytical Virgo as far as getting along and understanding an Aquarius?
Now about checking out the astrological compatibilty with your charts? It might give an idea on where you two have positive or really negative dispositions, in spite of appearances or everyday interaction.
But, for me (Aqua Moon) I'd say earth and air maybe not the best mix, unless above-mentioned synastry confirms possibilities. Aqua maybe isn't emotionally triggered by a sensitive, romantic, analytical Virgo. Perhaps considers you like a nice specimen, but doesn't need to get any closer???
I'd like to hear what real Aquas have to say about this, b/c I'm somewhat biased about earth signs... at least as far as close/intimate relationships might go. They're not loony enough, it seems. (Although they can be psycho, but that's another level.)
Sorry! Don't know why the 3x "sensitive, romantic, analytical Virgo" comes up! - I'd copied your words, but not for that purpose!!!
That really looks wierd!!! Sorry!
Looks like I'm being stalked by a....
There's a lot to go into -- many different kinds of compatibility and attraction that are shown in a chart beyond Sun sign characteristics. I can identify with both sides of what you've written -- broad-minded Aquarius telling a long story with an abstract point and curious Virgo who wants to know everything about everything. You described that dynamic well, lol. So my best advice here is, as much as possible, getting out of your own head. Sometimes what feels generic to us is precisely what the other person is looking for. Conversely, sometimes what seems to cause friction is in fact an appreciated or endearing quality! As long as you then let her finish her story ;). You each bringing something different to the relationship isn't a bad thing. Just keeping lines of communication open is important so you can determine if it's really an issue for her or just her way of being.
And, welcome to the forum!
I think you've done some good research in order to understand Aquarius. If you are able to have her whole chart, you might understand her even better. She may have a different emotional state, thinking style, love nature, fears, etc. from an Aquarius. If you have your whole chart, you may be able to understand yourself better, too.
Because you're a Virgo, you're always striving to be perfect, and I think you're trying to be perfect for this Aquarius woman. I think you're perfect how you are. What I mean is, just be yourself! I see you being humble, critical, and analytical towards yourself. You're focusing on what you think are your personal flaws. She likes you for you already most likely because you're interesting! Aquarius is an air sign and doesn't like to be bored.
Virgos are super interesting because they know a lot, so this would be appealing to Aquarius. They like people who are brainy. Virgo would also give Aquarius a lot of space, since Virgo needs time to themselves to do Virgo things.
What you describe as a difficulty in communication may just be a difference in Mercury styles. My husband has Mercury in Virgo and while it's sometimes off-putting and aggravates me, I like its finer points. I think in broad, sweeping terms, so his detailed thinking style can feel slow and nit picky, but I know his thoughts are reliable. His thoughts have gone through the Virgo mill, and what comes out is grounded and makes a lot of sense. I have to wait a little longer than I would prefer, but his thoughts are very valuable to me because they've been refined through the Virgo thinking process. Mercury is exalted in Virgo for good reason.
Aquarius is an individual and likes people to be individuals. You are an individual. When you feel something inconsistent with how you usually act as being "generic," then that's not having integrity with how you are. Aquarius likes interesting individuals, so sometimes one can "challenge" you, or it may feel like one is challenging you, but they don't want you to change and become generic. They want you to be yourself, but they might challenge you at times in order to make things more interesting. It's not a personal attack. It's more like when people are bored and act up to want to liven things up. If you became generic, it would be boring, so just be genuine. Aquarius can be one of the most accepting of people's differences and quirks. If that is how you genuinely show interest, that is your quirk!
You're not going to be able to pretzel your Mercury style. The style with which you think is very hard to change, if not impossible. So take that into consideration, too. It's something people either like or dislike, but it is a consideration as part of the whole personality. People who love you are more likely to focus on the whole personality rather than the small quirk that bothers them. There are people I like whose Mercury style isn't my preference, but that's OK. It's one thing to be considerate and another thing to try to disfigure your Mercury style.