Forum

Notifications
Clear all

Ultimately Destructive


Elsa
Posts: 3756
 Elsa
Admin
Topic starter
(@elsa)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago

Have you ever known someone who is ultimately destructive to everyone they meet? I don't think this is all that rare but I do have a lot of planets / 8th house, so maybe I see these psychological extremes.

If you do know someone like this, what do you think it the core cause.  Mental illness? Psychopathy? Lack of a good role model?

Is this conscious in your experience? Or no?

7 Replies
la_sirena
Posts: 672
Registered
(@la_sirena)
Honorable Member
Joined: 5 years ago

Yes. From what I’ve seen it’s usually a combination of emotional dysregulation/mental illness and upbringing. Often I’ve seen that a person like this has good role models that come into their life but pushes them away. Usually they are conditioned to behave and respond like an early attachment figure and model their behavior. It can be hereditary but more likely learned. It’s a choice, but it’s mostly unconscious. Most people would choose to change this if they could, but then most people do not have insight into themselves and why they do the things they do and choose to blame others instead as it’s easier than facing themselves.

Reply
Warped
Posts: 651
Registered
(@warped)
Honorable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

I've known some who eventually committed actions that alienated everyone around them.  Are they "testing" the others' love or loyalty?  Testing how much they can get away with?  Testing God?  Is it self-hating self-sabotage?  One I knew had been introduced to alcohol in childhood by a self-medicating mother.

Reply
Elsa
Posts: 3756
 Elsa
Admin
Topic starter
(@elsa)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago

I recognize everything that both of your said. I wonder there a point for all of us, where the veil drops and we see ourselves. At that point a person who does this - say the constant testing - I could see a good percentage of them continuing as is. Perhaps they aren't interested in commitment or they may be easily bored?

So the person may not be malicious... or they may.

I think social media and computers in general (along with other factors) has made this a lot more common then it was 20 or 30 years ago.  I'd say it's the norm for a significant percentage.

One clue to this; something that got me thinking, is the newer crypto wallets, have guardians rather than seed phrases. I can't tell you how many people I have seen, stating they have no guardian (person they trust). I am not viewing this is a critical way. It's easy to see how this could be. A guardian of your wallet can access your money and whatever else you have in there.

Even spouses. Life changed when everyone has their own computer / tablet / phone.  People have two and three wallets and they are their own guardian(s). But if you die, your money will be inaccessible.  I wonder if this is on purpose but I guess that's another thread.

Point is, people are loners, more and more. Live alone, work alone and die alone. It's okay for a machine but not a great situation for a human.

Reply
1 Reply
Warped
Registered
(@warped)
Joined: 8 years ago

Honorable Member
Posts: 651

@elsa 

Loner here, relatively speaking.

Personally, I favor contractual arrangements with respected verified professionals and fiduciaries -- bank/trust, estate executor, caretaker, etc.  Personal relationships can sometimes prove untrustworthy or worse.  And why be a burden?

Every chance I get I implore people to provide for the care of their pets and the disposition of their belongings in writing with reputable professionals, with appropriate compensation.  Do not blindly trust relatives to do the right thing.

Reply
Libra Noir
Posts: 1129
Registered
(@libra-noir)
Prominent Member
Joined: 10 years ago

Yes I did know someone like this. I would say that yes he was a psychopath but I wouldn’t exactly say that’s the cause because my understanding is that psychopathy is determined by general behavior and state of mind etc. and destruction is part and parcel of that. 

Reply
1 Reply
Elsa
 Elsa
Admin
(@elsa)
Joined: 17 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 3756

@libra-noir this sounds right as well.  You get ground up in their machine. It's a matter of time.

I think when people are older, the pattern becomes clear. I think it's got to be clear to the person themselves.  It's almost like they are a vortex-pit... and here comes another unsuspecting, eventual victim, to be seduced.

Reply
Plutolover
Posts: 145
Registered
(@plutolover)
Trusted Member
Joined: 2 years ago

I've been thinking about this topic for the past couple of days. I have known a few people like this, and it's definitely more noticeable as they get older/their peers gain more life experience.

As to what causes it, I'm not sure. Some of them came from good families, growing up with good morals and know what they do is wrong. I'm leaning towards psychopathy because they can truly go all-out to destroy a person, it's a choice. I'm also sure they know what they're doing, the pattern must be so familiar to them, yet their needs/wants trump those around them.

Reply