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The Silent Treatment

music4am
Posts: 44
(@music4am)
Eminent Member
Joined: 13 years ago

@McKenna, sorry it was so horrible on you, that's not right in my book. But, I do think that's kinda interesting about your mum & dad, as I'm a cappy moon and the hubs is a leo sun surprised.

I do use the silient treatment, but it's more of a I need space to figure out how I'm feeling about an issue instead of being jerked all around out of center about it. Balance is a very important to me and the hubs has a tendency, more than most, to pull me far wide one way then another. I don't function well or from my true self this way. I need time to work thru my feelings on the issue, as well as time to think the issue out.

Similar to what SaD said, I need time(saturn/cappy) & space(jupiter) to figure out how I feel(moon) about the issue. If you can't give me that, then I have learned how to take the time/silence for myself or walk away, instead of employing my merc/mars in 1st , sextile pluto in my 3rd to verbally obliterate you from my life.

So yes, I do use the silent treatment, but on myself, so as to figure stuff out for myself and protect others. How does it feel? It feels good to understand the process and give myself the time & space I need. It works to my advantage now :),
Angie

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McKenna
Posts: 104
(@mckenna)
Trusted Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Hi Miss music4am =)

I wouldn't draw any comparisons... my Dad was pretty messed up... he had a terrible childhood. Looking at their relationship with grown up goggles on, there was no way in Hell their marriage could have worked =(

I have my Cappy Asc & my Mum & I get along & understand each other very well =)

I think it's all in the motivation really. If you use it for space, or to work things out it doesn't seem bad to me. It's if you use it as a weapon then things are nasty!

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Anonymous
Posts: 0
 Anonymous
(@Anonymous)
Joined: 1 second ago

It feels brutal. I used to freak out, and lose my temper and control, but now I understand the energy so I just give up and try to forget about it because when I am receiving the silent treatment in relationship, in most cases there is absolutely nothing on God's green earth that I can do to break it.

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Kashmiri
Posts: 93
(@kashmiri)
Eminent Member
Joined: 12 years ago

No, and I consider the silent treatment abusive. I have never seen it as anything other than psychological punishment and I have heard many people describe why they use it over the years.
I have only ever seen the recipient go into distress over it and that's not okay with me.

I understand not wanting to talk about difficult things (Mercury/Chrion/Saturn) but not talking AT ALL? Ignoring the other person when they try and speak to you? WTF is that all about?

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Anonymous
Posts: 0
 Anonymous
(@Anonymous)
Joined: 1 second ago

Yeah, funny this comes up actually as I was thinking while driving to work this morning that I would like to find a partner who is communicative, not someone who withdraws and gives the silent treatment as their first line of responding to me when there is difficulty.

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michele
Posts: 55
(@michele)
Eminent Member
Joined: 12 years ago

I do need to think sometimes. Just to get my thoughts in order, as noted above. It's not a tactic. But it doesn't go over very well, generally. I REALLY now try to communicate that I need to take some time. We'll see in the next go-round!

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