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Problem with Gemini (and Scorpio)
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misty
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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 8:17 pm
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elisa said

misty said

Scorpio is manipulative and, he probably knows you have feelings for the Gem and is waiting for the right moment to sting you back, hard. Aint no way a Scorpio leaving right when he knows you dont really care. He’ll leave when you’re down and under or perhaps when you fall inlove with him again. Thats what I’d do lol  

i dont agree with the males, but yes i can see with women like yourself.  

the men, in my experience, always have to have the power and control, and they’ll make you pay dearly. 

Remember the story of Betty Broderick?  He  (the scorpio ex) took everything from her, power and control. 

sure she had everything even after the divorce. but she complained in her videos from prison that he was always always in control.  that’s why it pissed her off even though she had a big house and a new boyfriend. 

that’s why, i was shocked about her story of this so-called scorpio of hers. that’s a very miserable scorpio man. 🙁

edit – and him going along with her shenanigans and going into the sex stuff? I’d have no respect for this guy following me around like a puppy. Maybe that’s why this woman /wife has NO love and respect for her husband. And wants the Gemini.   

Yes the Broderick story is literally me at my worst, when I feel powerless. Its a deep fear to be powerless, to be completely vulnerable to someone who doesnt value that. That why Im wondering, where is Scorpio man’s dignity in this case, agreeing to an open relationship after her cheating? Thats really a nightmare.

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soup
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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 8:28 pm
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Note from a Scorpio.

That Scorpio is biding his time.

My Sag husband cheated and I sat back and let him do it for over a year. Then, after the dirt hit the fan….another year. Then….BOOM.

In the friendliest way I know how to tell you this…. I wouldn’t be watching the Gemini, nor worrying about the Gemini. You have bigger fish to fry with that November 8th Birthday.

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elisa
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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 8:29 pm
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misty said

Yes the Broderick story is literally me at my worst, when I feel powerless. Its a deep fear to be powerless, to be completely vulnerable to someone who doesnt value that. That why Im wondering, where is Scorpio man’s dignity in this case, agreeing to an open relationship after her cheating? Thats really a nightmare.  

that’s why i was wondering…if this is a scorpio man? huh  like i said, even if he were  a libra, that libra was still plutonic.

the story she presented was all over the place, so i suggested to her that maybe she should not be married cause she’s taking advantage of this man.

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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 8:30 pm
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I have been young. I have had young children. I have been in the same sort of mess. I have been married to someone while I loved (I thought I did) another.

The only people who get hurt in the end are the kids.

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elisa
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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 9:05 pm
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misty said

Yes the Broderick story is literally me at my worst, when I feel powerless. Its a deep fear to be powerless, to be completely vulnerable to someone who doesnt value that. That why Im wondering, where is Scorpio man’s dignity in this case, agreeing to an open relationship after her cheating? Thats really a nightmare.  

also i think that for women, like yourself,you need to be in control and have your power too. 

it’s a sad sight 🙁    (edit – losing your dignity)

i hope OP comes back and explains herself.

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RockChick20
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Saturday, October 7, 2017 - 10:54 pm
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I’m not really sure what you want me to explain :-/

You’re absolutely right, the forgiveness is very un-Scorpio-like. He’s big on astrology himself and always says he’s not a very typical Scorpio. So… goodness knows.

We’ve been together a long long time. I was only 17 when we got together (I’m 33 now), and in 16 years together L is the only man I’ve ever cheated with. I’m not proud of it. I wish I could feel nothing for L at all.

I’m currently treating the fall out with L as a “break up” of sorts, in my own head anyway, just to try and give it some sort of closure. 

I realise I need to move on from him. Today has been a bit easier.

P really is a good man for putting up with me. I didn’t set out to fall for someone else, but that part aside I should never have cheated. I am not condoning what I did for one minute!

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TaurusWithaTwist
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Wednesday, October 11, 2017 - 12:44 pm
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RockChick, let me tell it to you straight.  You are in active withdrawal from an addiction.  Let me say it again, for clarity. YOU ARE IN ACTIVE WITHDRAWAL FROM AN ADDICTION. What are you supposed to do when you’re addicted and trying to recover? STAY AWAY FROM THE SOURCE OF THE ADDICTION. In your case, it’s this guy L. He’s kicking up all your dopamine/reward responses and that’s why you’re feeling so heartbroken and lost. Read up on what I’m saying about affairs and the addictive process.  You’ll see what I mean. 

Now, there’s absolutely no hope of your marriage surviving this as long as L remains in your life.  You must go completely dark, no contact whatsoever. There really is no going back to being just “friends” after an affair with that person.  Don’t fool yourself even further with that. There’s also no chance of him leaving his wife to be with you (you didn’t mention it, but that’s always the secret wish, isn’t it?). 

I don’t know enough about Scorpio men to know if your husband has really forgiven you or not. I’ve known Scorpio females that keep running back to the same abusive relationships/people in their lives, so…maybe it depends on  that particular Scorpio’s childhood and other life experiences (the ones I know who do that all have alcoholic parents and/or have been abused in some way). I don’t necessarily think it’s fair to paint all Scorpios with the same broad brush, but that’s just me. I’m hoping he really is trying to forgive you and and work through this marriage; but you also need to work on what was going on *within you* that brought you to the place of cheating on your husband. And no, it’s not your husband that pushed you to do it.  He may have not helped the situation but ultimately it was YOUR choice to do that.  

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Wednesday, October 11, 2017 - 4:31 pm
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maybe if you want to salvage your relationship you can, but the scorpio men i know or those with strong plutonic/scorpio in them, have the trust/respect thing going on. the plutonic men do get depressed and miserable, because they want a trust/respect bond very very badly.  they will feel intense revenge for being swindled like this, so that’s why i thought..hmm how did your relationship get this far that he followed you around in your shenanigans? He must have lost his job, had alot of loss, that he just hung on for the sake of it? i really dont know….

go through some of the links here, like this one is perfect.

https://www.elsaelsa.com/astrology/good-and-bad-scorpio-trust/

 

https://www.elsaelsa.com/astrology/scorpio-men-withhold-sex/

edit – yeah i agree that women always have a harder time, because of lack of power.  it will only get that way if you lack the power in the relationship, and it becomes toxic and cruel.

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Thursday, October 12, 2017 - 10:01 pm
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TaurusWithaTwist said
RockChick, let me tell it to you straight.  You are in active withdrawal from an addiction.  Let me say it again, for clarity. YOU ARE IN ACTIVE WITHDRAWAL FROM AN ADDICTION. What are you supposed to do when you’re addicted and trying to recover? STAY AWAY FROM THE SOURCE OF THE ADDICTION. In your case, it’s this guy L. He’s kicking up all your dopamine/reward responses and that’s why you’re feeling so heartbroken and lost. Read up on what I’m saying about affairs and the addictive process.  You’ll see what I mean. 

Now, there’s absolutely no hope of your marriage surviving this as long as L remains in your life.  You must go completely dark, no contact whatsoever. There really is no going back to being just “friends” after an affair with that person.  Don’t fool yourself even further with that. There’s also no chance of him leaving his wife to be with you (you didn’t mention it, but that’s always the secret wish, isn’t it?). 

I don’t know enough about Scorpio men to know if your husband has really forgiven you or not. I’ve known Scorpio females that keep running back to the same abusive relationships/people in their lives, so…maybe it depends on  that particular Scorpio’s childhood and other life experiences (the ones I know who do that all have alcoholic parents and/or have been abused in some way). I don’t necessarily think it’s fair to paint all Scorpios with the same broad brush, but that’s just me. I’m hoping he really is trying to forgive you and and work through this marriage; but you also need to work on what was going on *within you* that brought you to the place of cheating on your husband. And no, it’s not your husband that pushed you to do it.  He may have not helped the situation but ultimately it was YOUR choice to do that.    

L isn’t speaking to me at all. He’s still got me completely blocked on everything, so I’m leaving him alone. It bloody hurts though. So don’t worry about him remaining in my life, that won’t happen. 

And yes absolutely you’re right it was my own choice to have the affair. I hold my hands up.

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Thursday, October 12, 2017 - 10:16 pm
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Sorry you’re hurting rockchick. Hopefully you can look back some day and see that he’s doing you a huge favor by disappearing. 

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Thursday, October 12, 2017 - 10:17 pm
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I’ve been working out the charts for us :

Me :
Sun sign : Sagittarius
Rising sign : Gemini
Moon sign : Cancer
Chinese sign : Pig

P:
Sun sign : Scorpio
Rising sign : Unknown
Moon sign : Taurus
Chinese sign : Dragon

L
Sun sign : Gemini
Rising sign : Unknown
Moon sign : Cancer
Chinese sign : Pig

Well I think that kind of sums up why I’m so attracted to L 

It’s true, it does feel as though I’m in withdrawal from an addiction. It hurts. Every part of it hurts. 

At the same time though, P is being warm and caring now, he says I’m worth all the heartache I’ve put him through. He says he wants us to make a real go of fixing things because he doesn’t want to throw away 16 years of us having been together.
I love him. I do love him. He’s nice to me now which is a big contrast to the way he was being shitty with me before. 

There’s one part of this story that I never mentioned before, which I suppose ought to be mentioned… 

P is around 30 stone in weight and has leg problems. Both of which make life very difficult. Sexually we are very limited as to what we can do. There can never be any spontaneity. It has to be very specific : on the bed. Limited to 2 very specific positions. So everything is very routine. Even going to swingers clubs is the same “routine” just in a different building obviously. I have to help him with his showers as he cannot physically get into the bath, and he has trouble walking more than a few steps at a time.

With L it was exciting and fun. He’s in decent shape (bit of a “dad bod” but toned enough. He goes to the gym and swims regularly.) So sexually that meant many different positions, total spontaneity, no limitations there at all. He did things with me that P would never be able to do.

Still no excuse for what I did, but I can’t deny it’s part of what made L so appealing. That and the fact that we could talk for hours with each other and never get bored.

I’m not a nice person for what I did, I do know that. I’ve been beating myself up about it.
I don’t want to hurt P any more, and I’m so grateful he has forgiven me. He’s the father of my children, and now that he is tackling his depression and isn’t treating me nastily any more, he is being very kind and solid and dependable, like he was when we first started going out.

The problem is I can’t get L out of my head. He’ll never speak to me again anyway, so I just need to stop thinking about him, but it’s so difficult. So very very difficult.
I don’t WANT to be thinking about him. It’s just… how do you stop thinking about someone who is stuck in your head?

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Thursday, October 12, 2017 - 10:23 pm
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elisa said
maybe if you want to salvage your relationship you can, but the scorpio men i know or those with strong plutonic/scorpio in them, have the trust/respect thing going on. the plutonic men do get depressed and miserable, because they want a trust/respect bond very very badly.  they will feel intense revenge for being swindled like this, so that’s why i thought..hmm how did your relationship get this far that he followed you around in your shenanigans? He must have lost his job, had alot of loss, that he just hung on for the sake of it? i really dont know….

go through some of the links here, like this one is perfect.

https://www.elsaelsa.com/astrology/good-and-bad-scorpio-trust/

 

https://www.elsaelsa.com/astrology/scorpio-men-withhold-sex/

edit – yeah i agree that women always have a harder time, because of lack of power.  it will only get that way if you lack the power in the relationship, and it becomes toxic and cruel.  

He’s disabled and so doesn’t work.
I work from home.

So we’re always together. I’m his carer. He relies on me for a lot of things.

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Thursday, October 12, 2017 - 11:52 pm
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Gemini and Scorpio is a very challenging combo.

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Monday, October 16, 2017 - 3:45 pm
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RockChick20, please don’t take what I said as berating you. That was not my intent at all.  It’s just important to take responsibility for our own actions, and it looks like you’re doing that. 

I understand with your husband’s disabilities that definitely makes things difficult for the two of you, and L seem even more attractive.  You said your husband is taking steps to work on his depression…would there be any way he’d be willing to work on his weight as well?  Have you ever talked to him (without making him feel horrible) about how all this affects you? I’m not sure what physical issues he has with his legs…is that something to do with his weight, or is there another issue separately with his legs? Is it something that is permanent? If it’s none of my business, you can tell me I won’t be offended.  

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Monday, October 16, 2017 - 4:22 pm
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Rock Chick, I understand what it is like being a spouses caregiver. It changes the dynamic completely. Its difficult to look at your spouse as a sexual partner. Being a scorpio I still have needs but I have shut that down so not to go outside of the marriage. I don’t know how old you are but I am 61 and my spouse is 67,SEX is Something I have learned to give up since my scorpio in Saturn transit. I know many caregivers that are much younger than I . I cant imagine that I could go without if I was younger. You are commended for hanging in there with a disabled spouse when so many would just walk away. 

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