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Power and respect in interpersonal family and business relationship

plutonian
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I am 43, all my life I have believed that I do not need power over anybody, and that I would be respected for what I am. As they say "you only need power if you want to hurt somebody, otherwise love is sufficient".

And my Libra Sun,moon Mercury and Pluto made me act that way, silencing my Venus and Mars in Scorpio.

But of late I am feeling people respect you better if they see you have some sort of power, even in family.And specially people in power.and it is scientifically proven people in power always suck.

Your views.

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sophiab
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There are different forms of power. What we see a lot of is people taking and using power as a compensation for feeling empty and fragile internally (these elements are rejected, denied, projected onto others) ... you could call it narcissistic power (also, perhaps colonisation). Power is taken by identifying with, accumulating or hoarding external sources which are collectively recognised, or labelled as powerful. Alternative, but less commonplace - power based on internal identification with one's own self.. getting to a place of strength through directly facing emotional fragility, distress, wounding, etc owning it and not rejecting it over time. Knowing what is you and what you've taken on from others, in terms of identity, roles, emotional wounding (transgenerational). With Pluto in Libra, this is a readily available path.. deep self observation and growing from the experience of interacting with the other, recognising the extent of inner resources (which connect to universal energy, infinite rather than finite). As you say, this type of power is based on love, self-love, which transforms all relationships and life experience going forwards. 

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sophiab
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I would add, that families, because of their very nature tend to operate on the narcissistic model of power, because members of the family are inherently enmeshed in regards to identity and the family unit is relient on this sacrifice of self for its own strength/identity. People tend to go along with the unwritten laws of family (you must give up on achieving sovereignty) as the unit offers more security and benefits in the wider society. Family units form some of the strongest power systems on the planet, and are the bedrock of larger societal systems, eg organised religion. The process of separation, which involves a sustained period of deep grieving and sense of isolation and confusion/lack of meaning/disillusionment needs to occur for each member to establish their selfhood. It is possible to do, but it's certainly a rough crossing. The more individuals that take this path however, the bigger the impact on the collective power system currently in place. 

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dolce
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I have found it's important to focus on boundaries and confidence and that is power enough in most cases.

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Elsa
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 Elsa
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I think people dole out respect based on their own criteria.

I also don't see how science could prove a person sucks, never mind all people with power suck. 

By whose criteria do they suck?
What is the criteria?
How long a time were the sucky people observed for and by whom.
Is there a control group somewhere?
How is power defined?

I am a person, therefore I am in the group - "people". I respect people who are authentic. This take quite a bit of power in today's world.

It's common that people conflate power with riches but if you think about it for even a minute or two, you can see this is false.

And people without power can suck too.  You can see this all around, on a daily basis.

But also, when someone acts sucky, they may just be having a bad day.

 

Last, and I don't mean this as criticism, your Scorpio is active because you are wanting to manipulate the impressions of those around you.

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plutonian
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@elsa I will try and understand my Scorpio energy better, as I am feeling it's getting the better of me.

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Elsa
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@plutonian Great idea. I'm sure it will be worth your time and trouble. Smile

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Elsa
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 Elsa
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Oh! Here's an example!

My first husband was 6'7". He had four planets in Scorpio but it was his height and he knew it. He said every time in his life, he ever applied for a job, not only did he get it. Other applicants applying with him knew he was going to get the job, as soon as they saw him standing.

So this is some of societies criteria, or at least it was in this era.  Tall is best. Case closed.

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