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Peaceful Death & Your Perspective On Life
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Elsa
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 12:17 pm
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Recently, a man died around here. I didn’t know him but everyone I know, knows him. He was very well loved, as is his wife.

Anyway, his wife was out of town; called him in the evening. No answer. No big deal – he went to sleep.

She called him in the morning. No answer. Well, he must not be up yet.

She called him at 9 or 10 in the morning. When he didn’t answer, she sent her sister and BIL over to check on him… rather than one of their kids. Who knows what they might fine.

The relatives went to the home, looked through the window and saw him lying on the couch, stretched out, ankles crossed, hands behind his head, with his ipad on his chest.  Pretty sweet, huh?

It’s sweet for him but not at all sweet for his wife and family who are all reeling and grieving.

At this point in my life; from what I’ve seen and all, I would happily pay the price if someone I loved could pass on in this fashion.

I don’t know how other people see things, but this is how I see things.

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Opalina
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 1:05 pm
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Absolutely. Swift death , is definitely the easiest.

My sisters father n law just passed yesterday almost 92. Went to the hospital with a heart attack. After he was transferred from the ER to a room He gave his 82 year old wife his glasses and hearing aides. He said I love you gave her a quick kiss and died.

  My husband is home now in hospice under my care, being kept comfortable. If he wants something in particular to eat he gets it even if he only eats a couple of bites I don’t care. My husbands main concern was not wanting me to have to see him die. That was what the nursing home was about. He was homesick so I said come on home. No better place to die than at home surrounded by the people that love you.

  

 I have less anxiety now and so does he as we are trying to let go and Let God.

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Ann
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Friday, February 15, 2019 - 8:32 am
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I’m so sorry, Opalina. I wish you strength and I hope he finds comfort in being home at least. heart

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Lakshmi
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 2:20 pm
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I think about this a lot.  Every time I read about a celebrity like Gandolfino (Tony from Sopranos) who died quickly from a heart attack while on a trip to Italy with his son, my thought was :  Way to go!  Lucky guy!

I’m even envious of drug overdoses despite the young age of some of them.

I’ve joined “Compassion and Choices” and attend their seminars.  I’ve thought of enlisting help of friend to get me to Zurich if I were terminal and in a lot of pain.  $5000 buys you a quick and painless  with the help of “Dignitas”.

But it shouldn’t be that hard.  Doctors can easily and simply hasten death by administering more morphine but few will do it because of the legal liability. I know.  I watched what happened to my father. He was in the throes of dying and the family doctor refused to give him morphine because it would kill him.  

Dying isn’t bad.  It is a natural part of life. But intolerable pain is an abomination.

Hugs to Opalina.  You can feel proud of what you are doing to help a loved one die at home. 

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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 2:44 pm
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In order to benefit from the Death with Dignity statues, you have to be terminal with a prognosis of less than 6 months to live and of sound mind, mentally capable of making the decision (and pc doctors are the ones who have to make the call on whether one can make the decision, which is one of the main reasons they hesitate…it puts an ethical burden on them.)

So, since you have to be capable of making the decsion, tough luck if you’ve got Alzheimers, since by the time youre terminal, you arent considered mentally capapble.  Also tough luck if youve got Parkinsons, MS, Huntingtons etc, because these deseases can be horrific and severely debilitating way before you get a 6 mo prognosis…

But I was just going to mention… if you do get a 6 mo terminal prognosis, you qualify for hospice.  And hospice provides every patient with morphine….enough to kill oneself.  So if you dont have the laws enacted in your state, there is always the option of taking matters into your own hands… i have heard of people doing it.

Edit..so i guess not all patients get morphine but I have seen most recieve…its also optional but there in case patient needs it.  And if youre in a facility like a nursing home, its different.  The staff would get it.

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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 3:40 pm
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I watched my Dad die in hospice. It was pretty horrible. He chose to stop treatment and decided that was that he was done.  He was there for two weeks and did not go peacefully…despite their assurances that it would be managed and he would go peacefully. Yah, I would pay for a different way go for someone.

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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 4:57 pm
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I am so sorry Jana. Its so difficult to watch a loved one die.

Was your Dad at home, a nursing home or a hospice center?

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Ann
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Friday, February 15, 2019 - 8:34 am
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((Jana)). One of my best friends had her father in Hospice at home and when I went to visit it was just a horrible time for them. The whole family was so drained and looked tortured.

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Elsa
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 4:02 pm
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((((jana))))

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Elsa
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 4:02 pm
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((((jana))))

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Tam
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Thursday, February 14, 2019 - 7:57 pm
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Sorry Jana and Opalina 🙁

I am the biggest crybaby in the family, both sides plus extend family and yet it is me that somehow sits with the dying overnight so that the others can go home and get some rest. No one dies when I’m there but shortly after I leave. It’s that odd? I’m thankful maybe that is why they hang-on, for my sake. My Pisces uncle had the longest death. 

My Gemini grandfather died at home sitting at the kitchen table at breakfast. He said “that is the sweetest coffee I have ever had” and then died of a heart attack. His mom had a terrible death at a young age but he was granted an easy one. I don’t understand these things but there they are.

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Wednesday, February 20, 2019 - 9:40 am
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I want my death to be exciting: mauled by a snow leopard, struck by lighting etc. Something memorable and panic-driven, which leads to the giving in and a flood of 5-HT, opioids and tryptamines flooding my synapses.

Or I’ll do what Huxley did.

But from what religious reading of numerous Faith’s that I’ve read, along with my own mystical and psychedelic experiences, this isn’t it. Seems we or our consciousness goes on. Just death of the physical self.

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anonymoushermit
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Wednesday, February 20, 2019 - 3:30 pm
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Maybe I would be as adventurous as you twenty years ago. Now, I’m worn out. Phew! You really are a dark Aquarian then! laugh

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Elsa
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Wednesday, February 20, 2019 - 3:10 pm
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Another death.

My friend came home to find her brother lying in bed with the door open. He’s been staying with her and her husband for the last three years. He usually would shut the door.

She walked away, but realized she should have checked him. When she did, she found him cold… dead.

She called 911 and they had her do CPR on him for 20 min until they got there…

He was lying peaceful when she found him, but he was in tons of pain, so who knows. 🙁

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Wednesday, February 20, 2019 - 3:28 pm
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It’s not something I think about. I would just surrender to it if it happened, though. Not sure I would have much of a choice.

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