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How to deal with Venus-Pluto synastry?
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WateryAries409
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Sunday, January 25, 2015 - 9:59 pm
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I have never felt so restricted in a relationship I’m the Venus (In Taurus) person and the other person has Pluto in Scorpio. How do you deal with being the Venus person? Also how do you ignore the Pluto person?

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WateryAries409
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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 4:54 am
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I have read a lot about this aspect but I would like people’s first hand experience with this placement, please and thank you =)

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Goldie
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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 6:18 am
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My husband and I have this aspect between each other twice in sextile; my Venus sextiles his Pluto, and his Venus sextiles my Pluto. 

I have read that it can feel ‘fated’, and I would agree that from the first moment he and I spoke, it had this surreal, fated quality to it.  I always knew that our fates were somehow intertwined but for what purpose…?

I’ve said before that jealousy has been a rotten cornerstone in our relationship and it is.  I experience it and express it more openly than he.  He experiences it as well, but like his other feelings, masks it.  

We have both changed tremendously since we first met.  In some ways good, in others not so good.  For better or for worse, this is us.

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WateryAries409
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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 6:39 am
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WateryAries409 said
I have never felt so restricted in a relationship I’m the Venus (In Taurus) person and the other person has Pluto in Scorpio. How do you deal with being the Venus person? Also how do you ignore the Pluto person?

Also I forgot to mention it’s Venus opposition Pluto.

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redro
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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 6:47 am
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My husband’s Pluto is conjunct my Venus, my Pluto is opposite his Venus (exact).

If you want my advice…don’t go there

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AriesChick
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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 10:30 am
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I’ve been the Venus person in an opposition and it makes me feel powerless, like a rabbit hypnotized by a cobra.

How does the Pluto person feel in an opposition?  I would think an insecure person would feel secure in the relationship knowing the other person was in their clutches.

It’s the aspect that you can avoid since it’s limited to a specific year generally.  Of course, people lie about their age on online dating so you might feel safe until you find out they have this aspect after all!

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 3:52 pm
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AriesChick said
I’ve been the Venus person in an opposition and it makes me feel powerless, like a rabbit hypnotized by a cobra.

How does the Pluto person feel in an opposition?  I would think an insecure person would feel secure in the relationship knowing the other person was in their clutches.

It’s the aspect that you can avoid since it’s limited to a specific year generally.  Of course, people lie about their age on online dating so you might feel safe until you find out they have this aspect after all!

I feel the same way but this has never happened to me before and the person who is the Pluto is Pluto ruled so I think this almost magnifies the unavoidable feeling for me. I’ll do my best to play a long but I don’t like the feeling of being restricted.

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 5:41 pm
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what do you mean by restricted, WateryAries? would you care to elaborate? :p

I was the Pluto in Scorpio to a Venus in Taurus. I can tell you it wasn’t easy on me as the Pluto person. It was obsessive on this side as well. Pluto’s in my 1st house and their Venus was in my 7th, exact opposition. I hated myself for being so attracted to them… plus their Sun in my 8th house. I hated myself for it because I didn’t actually ”like” that person and didn’t want to be with them either, I just felt this compulsive need to get close to them that I felt little control over. I actually didn’t feel like the Venus person cared or was attracted to me that much, I felt rejected by them if anything, and manipulated. But I also felt like I could see through them pretty well.

I would never want to experience it again. The opposition is too fukcing crazy… I think it’s the most difficult one in all the aspects imo, unless maybe you have other more harmonious aspects. It’s constantly swinging between love (or should I say LUST) and hate, no in between. Exhausting. The only thing that helped was distance… out of sight, out of mind.

The man I know with the Pluto/Venus conjunction in Scorpio, sextile my Venus…. I can say it feels MUCH nicer being in the Venus position and in the sextile. I would love to have that in synastry again.

Eta: on second though, I think this can be a very sexy aspects if the rest of the synastry works… if it doesn’t then it gets crazy because there is a part of you that wants to be close to this person even though you know it DOESN’T work… it’s like it tricks you into feeling attraction, against your own better judgement.

I wish I could tell you how to deal with it, but I don’t even know. I tried for a year and nothing worked until thankfully they left and I stopped having to see them. If you want to ignore them just ignore them, don’t engage, don’t get caught in the power struggles, don’t fuel the jealousy or obsession, however you can.

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 6:54 pm
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I’m curious, does it work the same way if venus/pluto in same sign, although not conjunct? Also, what about a trine?

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 10:54 pm
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strawb. said
what do you mean by restricted, WateryAries? would you care to elaborate? :p

I was the Pluto in Scorpio to a Venus in Taurus. I can tell you it wasn’t easy on me as the Pluto person. It was obsessive on this side as well. Pluto’s in my 1st house and their Venus was in my 7th, exact opposition. I hated myself for being so attracted to them… plus their Sun in my 8th house. I hated myself for it because I didn’t actually ”like” that person and didn’t want to be with them either, I just felt this compulsive need to get close to them that I felt little control over. I actually didn’t feel like the Venus person cared or was attracted to me that much, I felt rejected by them if anything, and manipulated. But I also felt like I could see through them pretty well.

I would never want to experience it again. The opposition is too fukcing crazy… I think it’s the most difficult one in all the aspects imo, unless maybe you have other more harmonious aspects. It’s constantly swinging between love (or should I say LUST) and hate, no in between. Exhausting. The only thing that helped was distance… out of sight, out of mind.

The man I know with the Pluto/Venus conjunction in Scorpio, sextile my Venus…. I can say it feels MUCH nicer being in the Venus position and in the sextile. I would love to have that in synastry again.

Eta: on second though, I think this can be a very sexy aspects if the rest of the synastry works… if it doesn’t then it gets crazy because there is a part of you that wants to be close to this person even though you know it DOESN’T work… it’s like it tricks you into feeling attraction, against your own better judgement.

I wish I could tell you how to deal with it, but I don’t even know. I tried for a year and nothing worked until thankfully they left and I stopped having to see them. If you want to ignore them just ignore them, don’t engage, don’t get caught in the power struggles, don’t fuel the jealousy or obsession, however you can.

Hmm it’s quite hard to explain this person just won’t leave me alone in a way, and I haven’t been firm about wanting space because I don’t want to offend the person but I just have to be more firm for the both of our sakes, Also the Pluto person is always so over reactive to everything I do and say, it feel like I’m walking on egg shells sometimes.

Our overall synastry is negative it’s a kind of volatile energy with a crazy amount of sexual tension it’s nice but not really when one person is already taken (The Pluto person).

Sigh, Your right about the distance thing it seems to be the only thing that helps, I just will let it play out and ignore the person as much as I can.

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 11:00 pm
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My one bad experience was with a man with whom I had bad overall synastry so perhaps this one bad aspect combined with general overall good aspects wouldn’t be terrible.  I live in hope!

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Monday, January 26, 2015 - 11:08 pm
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AriesChick said
My one bad experience was with a man with whom I had bad overall synastry so perhaps this one bad aspect combined with general overall good aspects wouldn’t be terrible.  I live in hope!

That’s definitely true!, Usually if you have enough good aspects they outweigh the bad and even them out.

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Tuesday, January 27, 2015 - 12:37 pm
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Unfortunately I have to be around this person, but I will do my best to avoid them.

redro said
My husband’s Pluto is conjunct my Venus, my Pluto is opposite his Venus (exact).

If you want my advice…don’t go there

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Thursday, February 22, 2018 - 2:50 am
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I’m resurrecting this old thread because I just extracted myself from a Scorpio venus conjunct pluto situation.  My uranus-pluto-moon sq his uranus-saturn-moon also but with a larger orb.   

He is venus sq pluto, sun trine pluto.  I’m pluto-moon, with 8th house Scorpio planets.  

His South node is in my 8th, 5 degrees from my venus.  This definitely was a past life karmic experience.  The synchronicities and psychic connections were out of this world.  Hugely intense, obsessive, full of love, sweet experiences vacillated with love-hate reactivity, frequent anger, and it felt like he had the power.  I just couldn’t take it anymore so exited the situation permanently.  As the venus person, I didn’t ignore pluto but I was always aware of his presence.  I’m sure we were both effecting each other.  

In retrospect, he gave me a “gift” of freedom in the beginning, and eventually my leaving was about me taking back my power and never allowing it to be given up again.  I’m glad to be back from the underworld and I’m still digesting what occurred.   

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Wednesday, May 23, 2018 - 6:30 am
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I’ve been the Pluto in an exact Pluto conjunct Moon interaction and also the Pluto in a Pluto opposite Venus interaction. In both cases they were telling me about other girls. Why would a boy in his right mind do that, I can not understand. The Moon one was staying in a different town and telling me (the girl) to travel to his town in order to meet him while telling me he was traveling to different towns and countries in order to meet other girls — extremely rude and stupid at the same time. The Venus one was also telling me how he was going to different bars, picking up girls and sleeping with them. I still have no idea why he was telling me that, since I never asked, neither one of them.

So I felt like they both ignored me and were rude and insensitive and especially the Moon one was a jerk for asking me to go after him while he was going after other girls. Maybe that is why the so called “weak” planet Venus or Moon feels like Pluto is obsessed or jealous with them, cause they are saying and doing really stupid things and Pluto feels offended.

However I’ve known the Venus person for 12 years and the Moon person for 2 years and we are still sort of chatting online once in a while.

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