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Confused Capricorn
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wwcod1986
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Tuesday, December 5, 2017 - 6:06 pm
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Several months ago, me and a virgo girl from my past ran into each other at a grocery store and she gave me a classic female flirty “I want to talk to you” wave. The old finger wiggle and a smile way girls wave. So a few weeks later we got back in touch. At first it was mostly talking about how things have been in our time apart and what happened in the past that caused our falling out.

 So after all that came to light I took a little to think everything over before I told her I would be able to forgive her for the past and I was hoping to rebuild our friendship and that I still cared a lot about her. If things would go good between us that I was interested in having a relationship with her. Witch was something we talked about from before.

Well since then things have been weird. We don’t talk to each other as much and when we do she is very shy and vague about things. Even simple questions like “how was your thanksgiving, have anything good?” she doesn’t answer. But here’s something I find kind of weird, her and my mother have run into each other times during all this and they get a long great. They are very talkative, she open and honest about telling her stories about her life, and she’s asking her personal questions about me.

She wants to know things like do I have any mental issues because of a car crash I was in. Asked about me having PTSD the last time they saw each other. She asked about what my values are as far as what my religious believes where. “Does he go to church, does he believe in GOD”. She remembers small detail about me that I told her close to seven years ago. Favorite hockey team, little weird things I told her I do because of OCD. Signs that she might like me kind of stuff, but as far as I know she has a boyfriend. They fight from what I’ve heard but that doesn’t mean much. Is this normal for virgos to do if they do like someone?

She’s had some bad ex boyfriends during the time we were apart so I don’t know if that’s playing into this or not. The fact that she ignores some of my messages, but is reading even the ones she won’t answer with the fact that she’s asking my mother for information about me is confusing. She knows she can ask me anything yet won’t really engage conversation with me. My friends and family say her behavior is a good sign but I can’t help feeling I’m bothering her and shouldn’t say anything anymore.

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doeieori
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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 4:02 am
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She probably feels she doesn’t really deserve a guy like you and tries to rationalize that thought by digging around about you. Looking for faults and stuff like that. Telling her it would be a mistake. Or she feels she doesn’t deserve you flat out.

 

Why did you have a falling out ? the answer should very much lie there. Introspect for a link about why she wants to know so much about you yet can’t ask you directly.

 

If someone is asking questions to your mother and that is indeed the truth ; there is definitely something more to it.

 

Be brave and ask her out. Be gentle ; read the situation ( atmosphere ). At what point does she close up? Be mindful of that. Finally make a move. She might be scared of getting hurt maybe she was hurt a lot in the past.

 

It could be numerous things in the end. The only way to find out is by being brave and mindful of her feelings while doing yourself justice which is hard but doable. 

 

Good luck.

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cosmicbeast
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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 10:04 am
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If you like this girl and you’re interested in a relationship with her, I think you have to play along with this. I think you’re being “vetted” to see if you have potential.

Respect her methods of questioning with your mother and respect the fact that she is currently in a relationship. If you try to impose your will on this, i.e. criticizing her methods, disrespecting her relationship, you’re likely to lose her interest. Of course that could still happen anyway, but I think you’ll have the best chance if you prove yourself to be the better option by setting a good example of behavior.

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wwcod1986
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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 2:29 pm
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doeieori said
She probably feels she doesn’t really deserve a guy like you and tries to rationalize that thought by digging around about you. Looking for faults and stuff like that. Telling her it would be a mistake. Or she feels she doesn’t deserve you flat out.

Why did you have a falling out ? the answer should very much lie there. Introspect for a link about why she wants to know so much about you yet can’t ask you directly.

If someone is asking questions to your mother and that is indeed the truth ; there is definitely something more to it.

Be brave and ask her out. Be gentle ; read the situation ( atmosphere ). At what point does she close up? Be mindful of that. Finally make a move. She might be scared of getting hurt maybe she was hurt a lot in the past.

It could be numerous things in the end. The only way to find out is by being brave and mindful of her feelings while doing yourself justice which is hard but doable. 

Good luck.  

I know that she has a high opinion of me, she’s told my mother that she feels I’m a very nice guy and I have a high intellect. Not her words just my way of saying she thinks I’m smart. Funnily enough I feel the same way about her. I’ve also had a rough go of it with dating and see her as being to good for me. Especially now that she’s improving herself so much.

We had a falling out back in 2012 because as she told me there was “bad things” going on in her life at the time. So I ended up getting the old “it’s not you it’s me” line and she left for the air force. She told me mother (again won’t tell me things) that she is a recovering drug addict. Once I heard about that I told her that I knew about her drug use before and didn’t hold it against her then nor do I now. If she ever needs any help or support I’m here for her.

She knows I’m taking classes to be a chef or at lest better cook, she’s a foodie, I’ve offered to cook her a steak dinner one night if she’d ever be interested. Didn’t tell me anything about that.

All I want is for her to be happy, I care about her a lot. My mom has told her this so she should know that’s the truth. Hell if need be I’d be willing to lay down my life to save hers that’s what I see in her. When she does see faults in me she is quick to try and build me up. “Your not a giant fuck up, your worth so much” Always was like that.

When we first met about 3 days into things she tells me that I sound like the male version of herself. As time went on she was right. Similar personality, interests, believes, goals, even our hair and eye colors are close. Sounds to me like a soul mate right there.

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doeieori
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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 3:04 pm
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You are so in love dude :DDDD

 

Easy there tiger. She has a boyfriend if i’m not mistaken.

 

Honestly if it was me , i would still go for it i know its petty but i read people easily so i have an edge as to would she want me to. If she would i just do her and me justice.

I don’t know if you have that luxury. Be careful though i know what its like to wallow in love. And like poof it crumbles down. I’m a Scorpio Cancer Pisces after all :c

I can’t know everything but to me it really sounds like she wants you yet does not feel she deserves it. Be the man of her dreams. Sweep her off her feet dude. Make her realise she not only deserves it make her see she’ll enjoy it more than her current situation.

 

Don’t focus on her past. She wants to probably let that go. If she talks to you about it listen. If not don’t really mention drugs. I’m pretty sure it makes her feel insecure.

 

Don’t take my advice as an absolute. I can’t really comment on soul mates. Well i could but its not my place to.

 

Huh i don’t know if this can help you ; but i have a virgo friend male who went studying in china. A scorpio woman fell in love with her there. They lived together for a while.She was ready to leave her family ; leave her studies when my friend was returning home. My friend really loved her too. But she had dreams ; my friend was older and could not let her sacrifice so much just for him.

 

Maybe you give off that vibe too. Maybe you give too much. Sometimes it can be hard for someone to carry that weight. [ not in a bad way no better word comes to me ]

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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 3:56 pm
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Virgos have excellent memories. I’m a Virgo and I remember all the details about a love interest (but not only). Virgos also like to take care of the others and do things for them and appreciate a lot when others notice the things they do or do things in return. But key here is delicacy. Virgos don’t like grand gestures… Keep that in mind.

I never dated a Capricorn, but I have greaaaaat Capricorn friends. Cappies have such a great sense a humor and I’ve always felt Virgos and Capricorns looove to spend time together talking and laughing. No one makes this Virgo laugh like a Capricorn does (but don’t tell my Scorpio boyfriend… hahaha).

I’d say go gentle and slowly, but go… make the step. And don’t forget Virgos notice every details, every nuance.

And yes, I’d say it’s normal Virgos like to have information about the profile of a love interest. Mental connection is a must for Virgos. You don’t have to worry, Capricorns as I said are just great people to chat with for Virgos. Relax and let your inner self shine through… I know Capricorns worry a lot, but  keep in mind that relaxing would help you shine your best 🙂 And don’t forget the sense of humor you guys have 🙂

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wwcod1986
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Wednesday, December 6, 2017 - 6:07 pm
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Calliope said
Virgos have excellent memories. I’m a Virgo and I remember all the details about a love interest (but not only). Virgos also like to take care of the others and do things for them and appreciate a lot when others notice the things they do or do things in return. But key here is delicacy. Virgos don’t like grand gestures… Keep that in mind.

I never dated a Capricorn, but I have greaaaaat Capricorn friends. Cappies have such a great sense a humor and I’ve always felt Virgos and Capricorns looove to spend time together talking and laughing. No one makes this Virgo laugh like a Capricorn does (but don’t tell my Scorpio boyfriend… hahaha).

I’d say go gentle and slowly, but go… make the step. And don’t forget Virgos notice every details, every nuance.

And yes, I’d say it’s normal Virgos like to have information about the profile of a love interest. Mental connection is a must for Virgos. You don’t have to worry, Capricorns as I said are just great people to chat with for Virgos. Relax and let your inner self shine through… I know Capricorns worry a lot, but  keep in mind that relaxing would help you shine your best 🙂 And don’t forget the sense of humor you guys have 🙂  

 

Yea like I said she remembers small details about me from like 5 – 7 years ago. My thinking is during the time we were apart I wasn’t always off her mind. The grandest thing I’ve done for her was giving her silver bullion because I saw her at the local food bank. If I care about someone I will do everything I can to help them. I wanted her to use it to get money for food.

She has told me that what I said bout my OCD in the past made her giggle so I made a half hearted joke that females have scary memories because she remembers something I said back then. I got yelled at a little, she was like “the female memory is just fine”. So I don’t think she got that one. My family says I’m so funny just don’t know how to make her laugh.

There is not much I can do as far as going after her. Because I’m handicapped I don’t get out much. We don’t see each other unless I bump into her but good luck of that. I don’t want to go pushing my luck cause of that boyfriend but I’m scared out of my mind I’ll loose her. Also she thinks I’m impatient already so only makes me look worse. And I do worry I’m going to mess this up. Chatting isn’t so easy with her either because she doesn’t open up to be.

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 2:09 am
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I would say knowing what you want is the biggest turn on for a woman.

 

You don’t have to literally go after her. You don’t have to say it too. Body language speaks a lot. Try it when you bump into her.

 

People aren’t stupid. Aloof at times but they have eyes =) . 

 

As with most things practice makes perfect x]

 

Best of luck.

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 10:07 am
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doeieori said
I would say knowing what you want is the biggest turn on for a woman. You don’t have to literally go after her. You don’t have to say it too. Body language speaks a lot. Try it when you bump into her. People aren’t stupid. Aloof at times but they have eyes =) . As with most things practice makes perfect x]

Best of luck.  

Trust me I know what I want and that’s to have her by my side. If I don’t show her that I’m interested in her then I feel she’s going to get the idea “well he don’t want me”. One time she and my mom talked my mother told her that I do really care like I said. And she thinks that when I told her that I still cared for her it might have scared Britney a little. Like an “omg after so long, after what I did he still cares?”

She did say about coming to see her at a local diner but she’s since gotten fired. If the church stuff is so important to her I could ask if we could do that together. I don’t get out much so in the five years since our falling out in 2012, I saw her three times. First she lowered her head and turned to her then b/f, second we passed each other at the food bank and she stepped to the side to walk past me further away, the third I got the flirty smile wave.

It’s such a weird thing, seems both of us have a little draw to each other but don’t want to act on anything.

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 11:21 am
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I agree you are being “vetted”. This is what Virgo does,  they analyze potential love interest (ad nauseam) and don’t jump into things quickly. This sounds exactly like how I act when I like someone (I’m Virgo Sun and Venus) I want to find out everything about them, every little detail, ask about them, and remember everything they tell me about themselves. I want the other person to make the move so I will only ever give very subtle hints, like smiling/asking a lot of questions… I usually feel very nervous around someone I’m attracted to and that makes me feel awkward so I kind of clam up and get shy to avoid embarrassing myself in front of them.

I think she is interested in you but probably worried, something is holding her back or makes her nervous about you…  maybe she has trust issues. It sounds to me like she has been through a lot and is cautious, doesn’t want to get hurt.

Treat her kindly and gently,  with a lot of respect and most of all: consistency. Virgos love and need consistency and reliability from their mate.

I think Capricorn and Virgo are great match and to me you sound like a good guy. Give it your best shot but if she doesnt reach out maybe she is just not the one. 

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 2:01 pm
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strawb. said
I agree you are being “vetted”. This is what Virgo does,  they analyze potential love interest (ad nauseam) and don’t jump into things quickly. This sounds exactly like how I act when I like someone (I’m Virgo Sun and Venus) I want to find out everything about them, every little detail, ask about them, and remember everything they tell me about themselves. I want the other person to make the move so I will only ever give very subtle hints, like smiling/asking a lot of questions… I usually feel very nervous around someone I’m attracted to and that makes me feel awkward so I kind of clam up and get shy to avoid embarrassing myself in front of them.

I think she is interested in you but probably worried, something is holding her back or makes her nervous about you…  maybe she has trust issues. It sounds to me like she has been through a lot and is cautious, doesn’t want to get hurt.

Treat her kindly and gently,  with a lot of respect and most of all: consistency. Virgos love and need consistency and reliability from their mate.

I think Capricorn and Virgo are great match and to me you sound like a good guy. Give it your best shot but if she doesnt reach out maybe she is just not the one.   

When we first got back in touch she asked how I’ve been but I didn’t really want to tell her much cause I didn’t want to upset her with bad news. She told me as long as your honest I wont be upset. After a few weeks I told her about what happened to me after our falling out. How I got very depressed, struggled with opined abuse, and how I’m trying to get better through my cooking skills.

She said she was srry for leaving like that and hoped I could forgive her. Few weeks went by and I told her everythings ok, can we rebuild things? Since then I have been very honest with her about issues I have. I still struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts at times. I told her about some of the weird little things I do and that I’m more emotional and tend to laugh or cry more then most guys. She said that everything was fine. As far as being suicidal she just told me “Jesus loves me so much, I’m worth so much, please dont ever do that”.

I understand her past makes her scared to really jump into things. I think her and her current boyfriend at lest knew each other 6 months before getting coupled. If they are still together IDK, their facebooks both say single, shes removed pictures of him, but he still has them of her and her family as his friends so who knows.

Everything I’ve seen bout capricorn and virgo relationships says its a great one 10/10 type stuff. So heres hoping.

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 4:06 pm
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wwcod1986 said

 

Yea like I said she remembers small details about me from like 5 – 7 years ago. My thinking is during the time we were apart I wasn’t always off her mind. The grandest thing I’ve done for her was giving her silver bullion because I saw her at the local food bank. If I care about someone I will do everything I can to help them. I wanted her to use it to get money for food.

She has told me that what I said bout my OCD in the past made her giggle so I made a half hearted joke that females have scary memories because she remembers something I said back then. I got yelled at a little, she was like “the female memory is just fine”. So I don’t think she got that one. My family says I’m so funny just don’t know how to make her laugh.

There is not much I can do as far as going after her. Because I’m handicapped I don’t get out much. We don’t see each other unless I bump into her but good luck of that. I don’t want to go pushing my luck cause of that boyfriend but I’m scared out of my mind I’ll loose her. Also she thinks I’m impatient already so only makes me look worse. And I do worry I’m going to mess this up. Chatting isn’t so easy with her either because she doesn’t open up to be.  

Virgos appreciate all the things other people do for them 🙂 Because Virgos give so much to others. I’m sure she notices everything you do and find it sweet 🙂

Also, honesty is a thing top on the list of Virgos. And of course on the list of every person who wants a health relationship and Virgos are not interested in anything short term. We are looking for long term only 🙂

Why do you say she thinks you’re impatient? 

Remember, although Virgos are very observant doesn’t mean we can read thoughts 🙂

Chatting is easy between Virgos and Capricorn… there is a flaw that I hope it will come between you two. It does not mean it is there from the start. And yes, Virgos are reserved, but Capricorns too… at least this has been my experience.

Now there is the boyfriend aspect I missed in my previous comment… It is not clear to me if this is a relationship or not for her. I read all the comments here and still there is this question mark if the guy is or not really her boyfriend? But if there is this feeling you have that you should take it slow, then listen to it… It is important you follow as you feel. I appreciate and like your cautiousness… If she really wants to be with you, things will happen even if you move slowly and gentle… As a matter of fact, slow and gentle is that Virgos appreciate the most.

I like very much the things strawb, said about Virgos 🙂

Try to enjoy the thing that is between you even if you want more than it is… even if there is so much uncertainty… What you feel right now is very beautiful and it is not given to all people. Do not let worries put a shadow on the beauty of feeling this love. Even if you don’t know where it will take if and if it will take you further… What you feel right now is beautiful and a gift… 🙂

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 6:25 pm
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Calliope said

Virgos appreciate all the things other people do for them 🙂 Because Virgos give so much to others. I’m sure she notices everything you do and find it sweet 🙂

Also, honesty is a thing top on the list of Virgos. And of course on the list of every person who wants a health relationship and Virgos are not interested in anything short term. We are looking for long term only 🙂

Why do you say she thinks you’re impatient? 

Remember, although Virgos are very observant doesn’t mean we can read thoughts 🙂

Chatting is easy between Virgos and Capricorn… there is a flaw that I hope it will come between you two. It does not mean it is there from the start. And yes, Virgos are reserved, but Capricorns too… at least this has been my experience.

Now there is the boyfriend aspect I missed in my previous comment… It is not clear to me if this is a relationship or not for her. I read all the comments here and still there is this question mark if the guy is or not really her boyfriend? But if there is this feeling you have that you should take it slow, then listen to it… It is important you follow as you feel. I appreciate and like your cautiousness… If she really wants to be with you, things will happen even if you move slowly and gentle… As a matter of fact, slow and gentle is that Virgos appreciate the most.

I like very much the things strawb, said about Virgos 🙂

Try to enjoy the thing that is between you even if you want more than it is… even if there is so much uncertainty… What you feel right now is very beautiful and it is not given to all people. Do not let worries put a shadow on the beauty of feeling this love. Even if you don’t know where it will take if and if it will take you further… What you feel right now is beautiful and a gift… 🙂  

I really do hope she appreciated the silver, it wasn’t cheep. Since I’ve know her I’ve given her three gifts. 18 choco covered strawberries for her “18th” bday witch was really her 17th. An open hearts snow flake diamond necklace just simply to say thanks for taking a chance on me, that I think you are a very unique individual and that our feelings would grow for each other. And the silver.

Im being as honest with her as I can. After she asked my mom bout my mental issues I offered to just tell her them. And as far as her being short or long term at this moment I want to be with her for years. Known her seven years, yes we were apart five of them, I’ve had feelings for her all but six months at the beginning.

I think she’s getting me being impatient from the fact I asked a lot to spend time with her after her high school graduation. In my book there was no reason not to, school was over and she was “18”. I wanted to get things going before she left for college.

I have no clue about the boyfriend. As I said her facebook seems as if she’s single but when my mother saw her last and offered to give her a ride home she said he was coming to get her. When he got there though Brit kept him waiting to keep talking to my mom. After sometime she said her boyfriend got pissed off and told her “I don’t have time for this, you wanted to talk to me so?”. Seems as if they are kinda on rocky terms maybe.

Later that night she started talking to me again more until thanksgiving then we didn’t speak for a few days (family time) but after the holiday she stopped talking again. So egh??? LOL

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Thursday, December 7, 2017 - 8:56 pm
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Thank God Virgo is an overall nice sign, I can imagine people running home in tears after hearing a Virgo’s assessment of them, if Virgos were mean and vicious! laugh laugh laugh

And if Virgo had the bluntness of Sagittarius (Thank God they don’t) and the sharpness and intensity of Scorpio, what a combination that would be. popcorn_gif

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Friday, December 8, 2017 - 3:34 pm
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anonymoushermit said
Thank God Virgo is an overall nice sign, I can imagine people running home in tears after hearing a Virgo’s assessment of them, if Virgos were mean and vicious! laugh laugh laugh

And if Virgo had the bluntness of Sagittarius (Thank God they don’t) and the sharpness and intensity of Scorpio, what a combination that would be. popcorn_gif  

Yea I do wonder what she thinks of me. I have considered telling her that it would be ok if she doesn’t want me around anymore because she’s starting to see how broken I am because of my depression and the fact I still have romantic feelings for her. That I don’t want to be bothering her by trying to force myself back into her life cause I send her messages and she won’t answer for months.

Also that because she’s improving herself so much I don’t feel I deserve to have her, I have a lot of issues physically, emotionally, and sexually that I feel she’s going to not want any part of. I just want her to be happy and if she’d be happier not being with me I understand. I try to put the girls needs before mine guess you could say I’m a giver not receiver person.

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