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Being emotionally numb

leobra1221
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After experiencing some past heart aches. I seem to not feel as deeply as I used to. Its like I cant break through the barrier.

In terms of love especially, relationship wise mainly. (as well as friend/family).

I care deeply, I am supportive but I dont quite have the depth I used to.

I sort of feel lost... this numbing takes away from life!

Have you ever went through periods of having dulled emotions? Numbness?

 

I am trying to get my passion back but it seems its taking more work than I could of imagined. I kind of isolated myself for years to do some internal work and found inner peace. Once I sort of broke away from "just me" I didnt realize how dulled my emotions were!

 

Its sad, life isn't the same. And it is hindering/holding back great relationships at times.

I know this sounds bad - but its something I am working on and am mindful of it. I know I am capable of feeling so much more so what's the hold up?

 

Mind you this has been years - maybe 5? I am relatively young - 25

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canscocappy
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First of all, I'd take a look at Chiron. Chiron is where we heal others but we ourselves are wounded. Furthermore, check the aspects between transiting Chiron and your natal planets. Remember, it's the quarter-life crisis. At your age, I made the mistake of being engaged to my abusive ex. Didn't pan out well, but it was for the best. Remember that around your 21 you had another Saturn and Uranus squares (to your natal Saturn and Uranus respectively), so, yeah, it's the roaring 20s, isn't it? It was at age 21 when I met my abusive ex and it was during Saturn return that I broke up with him. I repeat, it was for the best.

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leobra1221
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canscocappy
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@leobra1221 Around your entering 20, trChiron in Pisces conjuncted your natal Saturn, which tends to add salt to wounds. Once it entered Aries, it started opposing your Moon and then your Mars in Libra, trining your Sun/Mercury/Venus in Leo. The numbing is the sign of healing; a wound hurts and then gets numb before it completely heals. However, Chiron will stop opposing your Moon around mid-2022, so you will be able to see and enjoy the result of the emotional healing you're going through all this time.

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Elsa
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 Elsa
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Posted by: @leobra1221

Have you ever went through periods of having dulled emotions? Numbness?

I'd see this as a defense mechanism.  It doesn't matter how old you are. Everyone around the world has been put through an ordeal. I would find it quite extraordinary it anyone had not shut down at some point for some period.

I know you said it's been going on for five years, but you still don't want to psych yourself out. A major part of getting out of a funk is believing it possible. I would try to communicate (silently, privately) with my deeper self. The question is this: what's your deal? What is going on? What do you need?

 

And then wait for the answer, which will come.  

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leobra1221
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@elsa

I do believe its possible, and there are moments where I feel I get closer. But then it back tracks. 1 step forward 2 steps back

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Elsa
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@leobra1221 which is a pattern that can change!! heart heart

 
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sk8samurai
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You have a big heart with all that Leo trine Jupiter balanced with Libra.

Don't forget that Uncle Pluto is rolling over your planets right at the top of your chart, that's a heavy transit. He's making a firebird out of you.

Wow I just saw that Neptune is nearly conjunct your Saturn. That's can be an aspect of feeling a bit lost or you can find the answers from the ether.

Grumpy old man Saturn is sitting at your kitchen table complaining the soup is cold & the toast is burnt. That's no fun but it won't be for too much longer.

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leobra1221
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@sk8samurai

Thank you! I have faith things will work out, its just been a long road.

My Jupiter in Sag in the 8th makes me see the light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how dim.

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sk8samurai
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Yes! Jupiter in Sag is a nice present (presence) & has your back from The Island of Lost Toys.

Bumbles bounce.

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