Wacha' Doin' 2022
I popped on the Catholic radio on my way home from town. I've not turned on the radio in several months. I could only stand it for a a minute and a half, but they said that CNN lost 80% of their audience? In a one year period! I am not sure which year / calendar year, but when they mentioned, Jeffrey Toobin, I turned it off.
That's one heck of a drop.
The illness is fluctuating... the mouth feels weird...
the new guy is still around...
am watching/fighting my urge to sabotage this
troubled with recurrent thoughts about everything that can go wrong...
I had no idea am so damaged... that I want to end something which hasn't even given me an evident opportunity to get mad at
Expecting bad weather for the rest of the weekend. Planning to make Chili Colorado, which I have never had. But it looks good and I will loosely following this gal's method and recipe.
I am expecting to love this!
This Venus RX has hurt me and helped me so much so far. My husband and I are getting closer. He has changed so much ... he is coming back to himself a little at a time.
I have no idea what he was internally going through. And hard to believe from a Scorpio that I don't want to know. I want to SEE. I want to see the outcome. Because actions are the thing.
The conclusion is important. He shows complete and total devotion to us, the family, our survival in all this, keeping us safe, making sure money is handled correctly, that I am well.
These things matter greatly. I have been just sitting back observing. Any alteration from this path would have sent me packing but he is without a doubt sound, and here for a lifetime. No right or left turns. I stay silent, watch my own actions and work on my response to whatever he is doing.
I didn't think we could or would get closer. What I realized is that with all that outside stuff coming into our home, which I allowed, we were getting farther apart because of me. IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.... come on, its ME here. I am talking about how I allowed my adult children a front door key to run our lives.
Without that interference we are sound, sturdy and solid. He was always glad to help them and allowed me to over help them and never complained. But it really caused us to lose who we were as a husband-and-wife team.
This was my fault. Not his. He is still who he said he was. I feel like a fool. I accused him of everything but robbing a bank when it was I who allowed all the noise in our home. Since I have learned the art of boundaries.... and there is an art to it... this here is fine. I was calling the shots. I got out of the way. Then he started calling them because I abandoned it all. If felt like he was barking orders and bossing me around.
Today, we are both calling the shots together. God, it's nice to give half the big harry bullshit to someone and know they won't drop the ball. He won't.
Scorpio doesn't trust anyone. This is such a hinderance to our growth. To live like that, trusting no one? It's a horrible exhausting and lonely existence for sure. To take it all on because you are too fixated on the .... what ifs. The what ifs can happen no matter what you try to do to protect yourself.
I don't want to live like that anymore.
Who am I? A Libra? (I would not mind this) I no longer recognize myself. I am changed forever.
My progressed Chart.
Cap Sun/Leo Moon/Virgo rising/Cap Venus/Mars Taurus.
Scorpio sun/Taurus moon/Cancer rising/Scorpio Venus/Mars Gemini
Funny... my progressed moon in Leo. My hair is all over the place. Long now...full and wild. Grows so fast. It's a sight to see. I have decided I like it 😍
Pluto, Uranus and Neptune have changed me forever. I am completely unrecognizable. An easier going me. Giving away the command center. Who wants to be the fucking boss all the time? I don't.
It’s snowing here in North Georgia. ⛄️ Almost lost power a couple of times. The birds have been visiting the yard like crazy—bird feeders are full, so I guess they know where the chow hall is. 👍🏻
In other news, just checked my progressed chart and my moon just entered Capricorn. Last time it did, I was in high school with my nose in the books.