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my plan fell through last minute - still in Neptune Saturn quicksand


BellaDonna
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ugh I'm feeling so defeated. I just wrote on here asking for advice if I should commit to an apartment while confused amid 6 more months of Neptune Saturn transit. 

I was feeling confident in the decision and felt like things were coming together despite this debilitating energy.. then bam, fell through today. 

I know I am being redirected - but to nowhere it seems. I am set to leave the country to go back there in 2 wks, no place to go, no plan. ugh

I was feeling good like I was onshore for a moment of clarity, being thrown a freaking bone finally... and feeling like okay, I am gonna try to make the best of these next 6 months, float .. felt like a slap in the face today, like nope, wrong move... but yet I have no idea what else to do. 

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Warped
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If it doesn't come back, perhaps you can find a short or long term option on the various house-sitting and caretaker websites.  Also check for rooms for rent in a private home and sublets.  Just keep your stuff in storage until you find an apartment.

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BellaDonna
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@warped I have been looking for short-term options in the meantime.. but this is all abroad. My stuff is already in storage and has been for years. That's why I was excited to finally have my own place but was nervous to commit because I am still not entirely sure if the city is where I actually want to put down roots ..but with the opening of that apartment.. the timing and all, it felt like it was a ring to grab despite the Neptune Saturn fog and quicksand. I felt like it was an anchor and helping guide me despite not really knowing exactly what I want or where I want to be because it was an affordable place. Now, it just makes me nervous about committing to anything at all during this transit with 6 more months left... but it's just getting really old, the drifting with no place to call home.

Long-term, I haven't found anything as affordable as that other spot for what I was getting. So, it makes me feel like I need to drift and not commit yet. Hang like a loose tooth as Elsa says while I ride these last waves. But it's definitely exhausting.

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Warped
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@belladonna 

Something better and totally different will appear when you least expect it.  Neptune entered my 2nd house in 2011.  I stupidly moved back to California, then moved back up north in 2014 (bought money pit house), totally confused and bleeding cash. But by 2016 I'd sold it and had three new options, all tempting.  Then My House appeared in an email alert! Within 45 minutes I'd signed electronically and was booking a flight to Florida to inspect and decide. Best choice I ever made. Neptune is still in my 2nd for a few more years, but I'm Home.  

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BellaDonna
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@warped that's such a relief because Neptune is squaring my Saturn in the 2nd. So, that gives me hope that something can transpire. It starts to feel like nothing ever will that everything is meant to dissolve and I am left homeless,  jobless, planless.. nothing.

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sophiab
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Sorry to hear that you couldn't get the apartment. It's hard when you start to think about 'home' and imagine a place and then the situation suddenly shifts. It happened to me before and I got really really down because I was stuck in a difficult, depressing situation and wanted to get out, I felt hopeless by losing out. What happened in the end was that when an opportunity arose about a month or so later - same location but actually a better apartment, I just leapt so quickly as Warped described and everything happened really easily and positively and in the end was better situation for me. I could be like that because by then I knew what I needed, yes it was painful process. What was important appeared to be fostering the desire that grew in me for something, rather than the material details. Try to stay unattached to specifics and focus on kindling the feeling of wanting something for yourself, a dream, a scenario.... even if that isn't completely clear yet, the feelings that you want to experience are important. 

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BellaDonna
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@sophiab thank you Sophia, I sure hope so. and yes, you're right about focusing on the feelings <3

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