I realised something today, & I'm just gonna post it here quickly so I can come back to this thought later (& also good to know if others can relate!)
So there's this book "Rebecca" by Daphne Du Maurier which I'm sure many of you are familiar with (either the book or the movie or both); basically this is an all time classic. Also, I've been eternally fascinated with the book since I read it as a little girl.
I figured out why this book unsettles me, so much. (Minor spoiler alert!) The story begins at the end, where the narrator is recollecting events that happened when she got married to this handsome but troubled guy who owns a big home (& recently murdered his ex-wife but the narrator of course, doesn't know that part yet). She is looking back at everything from an older, more stable phase of her life. We gradually come to realise that the story that happened so many years ago, is basically a story of an in-between place. Even the narrator alludes to this by bringing up a hotel stay earlier in the text (in an unrelated context). As she goes on with her story, we find out that something is terribly wrong with that house & ultimately the narrator & her husband had to flee, making their home an in-between place too. I think that sort of, sets this tone of uncertain feeling which permeates the whole novel.
I realise this may not be a new thought but it's still new to me... It just so suddenly came to my mind today, like a flash. Perhaps because I'm also in a sort of in-between place right now in life & the uncertainty is kind of unsettling. And apparently all I can do is think of "Rebecca" haha
I'm sorry for the long & incoherent rambling! Just needed to get this out 🙂
Not long or incoherent at all! I was also thinking about liminal space today and how there are different ways to inhabit it. As a heavily earth weighted chart I can be completely unnerved by it...orrrr...take all that earth and access the opportunity of Neptune sextiling all that earth from the 12th house and dwell in the possibility therein. It brought Emily Dickenson to mind:
I dwell in Possibility –
Gosh, yes, something haunting about Rebecca, right from that opening sentence...
There are a lot of power struggles in the story. She is poor (perspectively) so is entirely at the mercy of her employer, an exit route appears while surrounded by the rich, the opportunity is very neptunian, and then she's drawn into the corruption of the adults, exposure to sex? and becomes corrupted herself through reality. Although rich, she still has no power, and is haunted by the perfect idealised deceased wife, who is a mirage. All the illusions eventually crumble along with the house.
It seems the global collective are also in an inbetween place - lots of harsh adult realities to accept and power struggles to deal with.
Did you read 'Don't look Now', short story, set in Venice, another weird space. Its completely terrifying to read... A sort of enduring and pressing anxiety throughout... the shadow of death hanging over it I think.
It was good to think about these books!