Do you understand yourself?
I often don’t. Maybe never. When I think I do I find out later that I was deluding myself in some way. There’s some things I’ve come to expect from myself but as far as understanding- no. And it’s actually like the more self reflection I do, the more enigmatic that understanding becomes. One would think it would be the opposite.
None of this is bad btw. Mainly because it mirrors the fact that I don’t understand other people either or current events. I can’t offer explanations for anything. I mean I know there’s psychological reasons etc., but there’s some other drive too that I can not explain.
Is that drive Desire? Maybe. But especially when I ask myself what I want is when things get very very ephemeral and impossible to articulate. Maybe it’s God that I truly desire? Maybe that’s what god is- all the things that we don’t understand. They do rule over us in a way but are also playful and coy. Baffling but not confusing.
So…….do you understand yourself?
I also wanted to relate this to the Sun. My Sun is in fall in Libra, so the self is not super defined. But it’s conjunct Pluto so there’s a motivation there for uncovering the truth. It’s pretty fucked when I think about it lol.
I also feel I understand myself. But I've had astrology all of my life. I'm also a very simple animal.
@libra-noir I agree with you re: Libra sun conjunct Pluto. You're a conundrum, based on that alone. But it's part of your unique beauty as well.
I understand many of my motivations but I think undstanding "what I am" is beyond understanding my behavior and not communicable. There is a core mystery that transcends the physical and that can't be explained with words. Art, music, poetry and some spiritual discussion point at it....but that's as far as it goes...pointing.The degree to which I can hold paradox is the degree to which I see it. i think you may be looking at the ineffable and being an air sign wanting to capture something in words that can only be pointed at and experienced and that's why you are referencing God. Rest in it and see where it goes.
To some degree - I do, but I am not a simple creature, and there's surely more to be revealed.
I work really hard to understand myself because, A: nobody else can do it for me, and B: I need to understand myself in order to be able to take better care of myself. I'm actually at a point of letting go of all other aspirations for myself, so that I can commit to becoming an expert at caring for myself, as I would for a child with special needs. It sounds depressing, but that's what I need right now...
My chart is getting beat up today under the full moon, which is opposing my 10H Venus in Aries. Saturn is square my Taurus Sun, Mars is square my Gemini Mercury (and will then square my Sadge moon), and Jupiter & Neptune are square my Mars opp. Uranus.
Basically yes and no. I understand my conscious motivations. Some of my conscious motivations used to be unconscious, and surfaced after certain experiences and self-reflection. I understand what drives me on a conscious and pre-conscious level. I mostly understand why I behave in the ways that I do, but I don’t always understand how to change the things that I do, and that suggests that I do not know everything there is to know about myself. Spiritually, I understand myself. But that is not easily definable because it’s not “myself” I understand but the connectedness of all things, which I don’t understand per se but I perceive.