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Chasing Dopamine
 
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Chasing Dopamine

Allie
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(@allie120)
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It is a place you can come when you need or want. It’s good.

I don’t really feel crushed. I feel like my communication is really off though, lately, for a while. I feel out of step with everyone, except when I just sit and engage in everyday things. This isn’t a “poor me”. I still communicate even if it feels like I’m getting bashed over the head. I just tiptoe for a while.

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Allie
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I’m not implying anyone is being “poor me”. For the most part I feel like I live a charmed life and have little to complain about, when you look at it.

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Allie
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This is what I meant by dopamine, but here it’s been mainlined like a heroin addict. This is gross (in demeanor, not in the NSFW meaning gross)

https://twitter.com/crabbington000/status/1595138789386903553?s=61&t=QriqUb_egFvWf0fT4Ay6vw

I hate TikTok. I don’t have one. It seems like a 2 minute dopamine high. Too each his own, I guess.

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sophiab
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I think in general kids get neglected, whether emotionally or physically. Some periods of childhood there is more or less neglect, space, time, or they are overworked to achieve but it's not emotionally satisfying, so there's emptiness. Then the question is, how do you fill this time when you're waiting to be independent? 

In the 70s and 80s I watched a lot of tv, I mean a lot!!! And I also was outside alot when weather was OK..even if there was stranger danger, we were outside alot and no parents were policing what we did. But I think there has been more control of kids over the following decades (dependent on location), more fear about their safety, and the go to space became the computer not TV. Before smartphones it was video games, that was the babysitter so they were indoors with it, glued on. Now the babysitter is mobile and they can walk around glued on before going home. So maybe the technological babysitter determines alot about the use of likes or not, because it has another purpose and meaning psychologically for these generations.

Also, thinking about it, the babysitter has become the peer group due to the connectivity of social media. So that's a different influence from what's coming down the TV or a video game fantasy world. 

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Allie
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@sophiab Oh yes. We are of a similar generation. I don’t remember watching a lot of tv when I was young because tv shows for kids were very limited. Limited in what was available and tv shows that had certain topics (more adult, maybe just R) were on after 8 pm, I think. It was just what they did. I remember being home sick from school and after the morning kids shows, there were just boring adult shows like soap operas or old movies (now I’m an old movie fan). 

Another thing that is so different: my mom didn’t play with us. Parents didn’t do that. And we didn’t want them to lol. We played with siblings, friends, or by ourselves. And God forbid you told your parents you were bored. You did that once lol. My mom could give a looooong list of things , chores, we could do. Interactions with parents were, helping them cook, clean, sew, etc. or sitting at the table talking to them while they worked.

This is always an incredible topic for me. Sometimes I wonder if motherhood is stressful because there is pressure to over involve oneself in it. In addition, sometimes I see a crying child in a store while their mother shops, and I wonder if maybe the child shouldn’t just be at home in a less overstimulated environment, just playing with toys or drawing or something.

I know I sound like a judgmental old fart…I have a Capricorn 5H 🤣

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Plutolover
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I drop by here every day to catch up. I really don't post that often - life has knocked the wind out of me and I rarely have the mental capacity to respond, but I appreciate each and every post and whilst I don't reply to many, they always get me thinking, agreeing, sympathising and so forth.

As to the 'like' button, I've never used social media, so it makes no odds to me, but it is nice to see others feeling the same 🙂 

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Allie
(@allie120)
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@plutolover I hope things ease up for you ❤️

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Plutolover
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@allie120 Thanks. I'll get there eventually 🙂

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Elsa
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 Elsa
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The "like" you get online may very well be imaginary. Think of the dating sites... it's been revealed many profiles are fake.  

In the olden days, attractive women were paid to hang around as eye candy for bar patrons, maybe more. They'd pay attention to the men but it's not real.

The platforms (like facebook) have told us all, in plain language, they test and experiment on their user base, manipulating them with things like "likes".

When they wanted me to institute shadow-banning on this site - guess how it was going to work? This is back around 2007.

The capability was for the forum, which was really busy at the time. A person would comment, see their comment post but no one but them could see it.  So the victimized person would be ignored... they would become despondent, think everyone hated them and leave.

Now this was the idea of the "nice" people I was working with. I was horrified. I'm just trying to say, you're out of your mind if you think what you see on the surface reveals the back end. And if you're going to write for "likes", you may as well be a bot and there are so many of them already - what's the point.

Scared, demoralized people are easy to control. If you don't want to be controls.. avoiding these feeling states is a good start.   But also... if you become a bystander in life, how is that going to be? You have no connection or worse, you think you have connection but you're actually friends with AI?

This is the one thing this forum has going for it. It's well defended.

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Allie
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@elsa This post is fire. 👍

Eye candy bots, manipulative engagement, and scared demoralized people vs being a bystander. I have often thought about these last two oppositions. 

Thank you, Elsa!

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