Advice: Will moving out resolve the anger I have against my family?
Long time no see, and that's because of overwork. I've taken in extra tutoring due to my sister's pregnancy as she is not able to do so, along with my translation duties. As my colleagues are overworked, too, I stuck with the load I'm carrying now, as I cannot find someone to delegate work to. However, I'm becoming increasingly aware of a nagging feeling that my parents are taking advantage of both my sister and I. I've felt that tendency for years, but it gets painful (it would take too long, but I have a lot of examples that demonstrate this to me). Furthermore, my exhaustion the other day has not helped either.
I've considered moving out. I would love to keep coexisting with my family in a rather typical fashion until things become more stable, but the anger has not subsided since the day I found out that my parents were asking my sister for money and she sadly ended up giving the money I had given her to save up for her birthing expenses (my parents asked me to help her with that, and I obliged). I was livid because of their insensitivity, given the fact that they had loaned money from her more than once and it's because of them that she needs money from me now.
I've sent my chart with transits and progressions, as I feel that my anger has been a long time coming. Now I wonder: is moving out the solution to my anger?
As someone pushing 60 who has lost more people than I care to remember, I haven't seen many situations where "forgive and move on" doesn't apply. Of course it's possible but, mostly I've seen people eaten alive with anger that prevented them from enjoying their parents last years or at least know that they attempted to smooth things up as much as possible. Then the regret and recriminations set in. Not always at once, but as they got older it crept in at anniverseries, birthdays etc. It was hard to live and hard to watch.
So getting over your anger may be easier, living on your own. But you could also get involved in your life and paper over the cracks in the relationship, erupting every Xmas or such. it doesn't usually happen without the decision to try to let it go.
Best Wishes canscocappy
Most folks get along much better with parents and siblings once they move out of the nest and become self-supporting and self-sufficient. Cultural and economic factors may delay this, but freedom and. Independence are a goal for most. Time to focus on a long range plan.
Jana's post resonated with me - it is challenging to maintain a good relationship with parents through a lifetime because ideally we need to overcome the tricky task of separating from them psychically in order to really know ourselves deeply, if you have a will to do that and it's a hard process. In my experience moving towards this freedom involves periods where anger and rage must come up to the surface, often related to a sense that these loved people have completely failed us (to the point of making our life and those we care about, like siblings, difficult, sometimes impossible). This failure can express itself through children taking on responsibilities too early, especially emotionally (and of course financially or materially) which actually blocks the true growth of the individual. Anger towards family can be seen therefore in the context of a real desire to grow, to develop your own sense of self which currently is impeded by your involvement with others. Longterm this process of growth will benefit all people you come into contact with including your parents, so don't be too hard on yourself for feeling these emotions. Your Capricorn rising, Cap outer planets, packed 6th h and also Taurus IC suggest to me that you may be familiar with premature maturity and responsibility. I noticed Uranus moving back and forth near your IC and opposing a Moon Pluto conjunction. It may be time to start separating from family physically, emotionally, psychically. Give yourself time... Uranus pushes for immediate action and can make things feel unbearably pressurised in the moment but it can be counteracted to a degree by self reflection, taking a step back and knowing you are ultimately in charge. Good luck!
I don't know if your anger would go away, but moving out could give you space. You may need to straight up address what's upsetting you if you are feeling up to it. Might just nip it in the bud.
Fwiw, I still have anger towards my parents and go back and forth between forgiveness and renewed anger all the time. Moving out didn't really change that. Talking to my mom sometimes does. Family can be complicated.
I wish you good luck with such a challenging situation. I know it isn't easy.