I’ve been reading Stanton Samenow’s various books about criminals. He’s been in the field since 1970. That’s 40 years!
At the end of one of his books, Straight Talk about Criminals: Understanding and Treating Antisocial Individuals
, he’s asked about fearing his clients.
He said he did not fear his clients on a day to day basis. Right then it hit me.
When you’ve done something for a really long time, your day to day experience is one thing. The scope of your experience is another.
I wish more people who have done something a really long time, would tell the truth about what they know.
You’re old, you’re wise, you’re experienced. I want to know what you have to say. It’s your book that I want to read, even if if your opinions and/or the conclusions you draw, upset people.
What have you done for a very long time? What can you tell us about it?
pictured – Ryabushkin, Andrei 1861-1904
My son walked in and looked at me like I had two heads. I was in my large fenced area sitting on the floor with a 160 lb Rottie. When he came in the dog jumped to his feet and took the defense pose. He said omg what are you doing? He said you’re here alone …he could kill you and no one would know. I said ‘yeah, he could, but he won’t’
I have been doing this a long time. Me and the meanie know each other. You can’t make me believe he would hurt me. In fact we are buddies. I have never feared him. I have worked with him for years. He and I are both getting old. He would protect me, but he would never hurt me. I respect him. And he knows this. And when I work with him I do it with the right energy. So he allows it. I am not a threat to him….so he is gentle with me.
He won’t let anyone else touch him but his owner. This makes me feel bad for him. When people see him they immediately fear him instead of coming at him with respect and kindness. People see something different than I do so they react differently. They cross the street to avoid him when he is being walked. The sight of him is intimidating for people so he doesn’t get a chance to get a lot of affection from anyone outside his home based on the way he looks.
He could hurt me. But, he won’t.
I’ve been a soft shoulder most of my life (Jupiter in Pisces?). When I was a little bitty guy my Grandma said I was a good helper and I took it to heart. Helping people has been the undercurrent running through my life. People with problems gravitate toward me and I walk them through a solution. What I find is that most people already know what they need to do but are unwilling to do it. So many times they won’t help themselves and it is best to let them work it out on their own.
I fix stuff, too. Dad was a mechanic and Grandpa was a builder so I learned how to make and repair things. I see people throw away stuff that just needs a little TLC. Carelessness and addiction to shiny new baubles costs people not only money but also peace in their lives because they’re always hungering after something new instead of being happy with what they have.
“You’re old, you’re wise, you’re experienced. I want to know what you have to say. It’s your book that I want to read, even if if your opinions and/or the conclusions you draw, upset people.”
I’ve been figuring out what it’s like to be human for a long time: certain about fewer and fewer of the rules at this point I try to live the practice of an elder-in-training I began at age 50. Divorced and unsettled, I returned to my birthplace. There I found my blind spots, my roots and the teachers to set me back on the journey.
I have an 8th House Life (those planets aspect every other planet in my life)life and death, rebirth and the shadow life is what I live. I’m not always good at it … but it’s public anyway, in spite of my Scorpio Sun. I had a chance to talk about this aging journey. Here’s a link to the podcast of that interview: http://kwparadio.org/2013/08/07/mokihana-calizar-the-safety-pin-cafe/
I’ve been a draftsman for 34 years. Drawing is the ultimate form of paying attention. You would be shocked at the amount of thought and work people put into the things you use everyday; from the curve of the TV remote to the parking lot you park in.
@Tam … very cool!
I have a half-rottie half-lab and your post really touched me.Beautiful writing. Thank you.
This posting has brought out some lovely shares!
I’ve been in the exercise/rehab game for about 25 years now. Having my own company, as well as working with physical therapists, doctors, exercise physiologists, yogis, etc. has taught me how to discern someone’s interest in getting “better” (improving health).
Just the body language, along with a hint of facial expression, and I can tell who wants/is willing to do the “work” to get improve themselves and who is going through the motions.
Quite honestly, I would like to say this does not influence my discourse with said person, but it does…