Who Becomes A Caregiver?

Caregiver paintingAs the population ages, more and more people are find themselves in caregiver positions. Many of them never saw this coming.  They just wake up one day; the need is there and they decide to fill it the best they can.

Recently, I’ve had a lot of clients working in this capacity. They may be caring for a parent or a spouse. Many of them have full-time jobs on top of their caregiver duties. In all cases, it’s rough.  Some see rewards in their work.  Sometimes it’s just so bleak, it’s all the person can do not to circle down the drain themselves.

Anyone can be a caregiver but in working with this population, I notice themes in charts. The Virgo / Pisces or 6th house / 12th house axis is often prominent.  This is a no-brainer. These signs routinely serve and sacrifice.  But I also see a lot of emphasis on Cardinal signs.

I’m taking about Aries or the first house.  If a parent is ill and there are a number of children, it’s the leader that is most likely to step up and take action.

It’s common to see Cancer / Capricorn and the 4th /10th houses emphasized as well. It’s because these people tend to be responsible and parental.

Libra will also step in.  I think it’s because they don’t like to be alone. Consequently, they can’t stomach leaving someone to suffer in loneliness.

Working with caregivers is becoming a specialty of mine.  It suits me. I love to help people but I love to help people who help others, even more. It’s been years since I wrote about this but it’s a fact. It’s the Jupiter effect. If you can help a helper, you’re helping more.

Are you a caregiver?
Have you ever been a caregiver?
Do you think you might be called to do this at some point?
Would you respond to the call, or do you feel you’re unsuited to it?

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Who Becomes A Caregiver? — 23 Comments

  1. I have a packed 4th house. Even though I am the youngest, it’s widely understood (though unspoken) that I will be the caretaker for my parents.

    I don’t mind caretaking for the people I love. I do worry about the practicalities of it. My parents are older, late 60’s and early 70’s, and while they are very happily in excellent health, I do worry about being in a place in my life and career that allows me to care for them when the time comes. That’s one of the reasons I work as hard as I do. I want to be able to give them as wonderful a life as they gave me.

  2. Having been involved for several years in caring for someone with severe Alzheimers, my fondest hope is that I will kick the bucket without imposing such a burden on my family….

  3. I was a caregiver to my Mom who passed in August 2016 from Alzheimer’s disease. She was diagnosed in 2010, but it was going on before then we just didn’t know what it was. I’m a Virgo sun, Virgo rising with a 12th house stellium. The only Cardinal in my chart is Jupiter in Libra at 29 degrees and my Aries south node and Libra north node. I also have a T-square: 4th house Saturn, 10th house Moon, 1st house Sun conjunct Ascendant. It was my honor and privilege to be there for her. It was also extremely difficult as I lived over 3 hours away from her. I was fortune to only have to work part time, or temporary or not at all during her illness. The hardest part for me was other family members not seeing the need or feeling the need to help as I did, and also rage inflicted on me because of doing what I did. I tried to let it go and I pretty much have. I don’t want to feel resentful towards them. I figured it’s not up to me to figure it out or to judge. What you’ve written here is pretty much me to a T astrologically speaking. I guess it’s what I was meant to do and it was not what they were meant to do. It was truly a gift and we had some really special times together during that period. My Dad turns 86 in a few days so this is not over yet.

  4. I’ve been a caregiver when I was a teenager, helping to care for my grandmother. My aunt was the primary caregiver and even took me into her home. She was a Pisces Sun. I don’t know what time she was born. I have Venus in Capricorn and Chiron,both in the 4th. Libra rising. When my dear Aunt aged, I helped care for her. Not in the same capacity as I did my grandma, but I did step up and helped my uncle when I could. As a Sadge Sun I often felt trapped while giving my time to care for these women whom did so much for me. Selfish Sadge.

  5. I was my husbands caregiver. Jupiter in virgo my MC is there as well.Sun, mercury and Saturn 12th house; mars and Neptune in libra.
    Nothing I would choose to do but inevitable. He was about 6 years older so I assumed I would end up his caregiver but did not realize the task that it became.

    One way or another I become some ones caregiver. If not physically , emotionally and mentally. People come to me for advice and comfort.
    I now have my Taurus grandson living with me. He needs me as he struggles and the relationship with his Mom is so Volatile .

  6. I’ve always been drawn to and try to show my appreciation to caregivers. Seen too many people get physically and even emotionally broken down from years of service as caregivers, professionally or to family members.
    And sometimes you gotta remind them how the first rule on airplanes is to put on your own oxygen mask before you assist anyone else; to nudge such caregivers to let themselves get some r&r without feeling too much guilt 🙂

  7. Since you have been working with them, Elsa, have you found that the most fragile time for the caregivers is after the person they cared for has passed away.
    Close friends and family who are good enough to help them process the loss and adjust to the new gaps in their schedule are invaluable at such times.

    • That’s a good question but I don’t have an answer. Each story is singular. I understand the potential void or emptiness at that point but it’s not a given. Some people are really prepared for the person to pass. Some are relieved which is understandable because it’s so hard to see someone you love, suffer, never mind the toll it takes on you!

      Anyway, each story is poignant and that’s what they have in common.

  8. Agree with you jello. I was a caregiver for my beloved mother for a number of years. She needed a walker for the last few years of her life. We had a special bond…I knew that I needed to be there for her. I am a Cap Rising with natal Saturn in Pisces & a stellium in Scorpio. She passed away in December 2017…thankfully did not linger in pain…I could tell that she was ready to depart and was trying to prepare us. Grieving is a deep intense emotional process for me with that Scorpio moon…I still miss her but acknowledge that I had so many wonderful years together. She lived to be 88 years old…may my mother rest in peace.❤

  9. I have Saturn 29 Cancer in 6th house sextile Venus and Vesta and Mercury in Taurus 3rd H. Saturn is exact square to Chiron in Aries 2ndH. I help profesionally other people who are ill or dying. Moon conj Jupiter conj South Node in Taurus in third house also.
    Sun conjunct IC opposite Neptune – i am not perceived correctly or just invisible to other people.

  10. I did care taking for my parents. We did hire help too but I still took them to appointments, made sure their meds were being taken, their health and home cared for and tried to keep them as comfortable as I could until my mom passed first at home, then two years later, my sweet dad. I have Venus in Capricorn in the second, Ceres in Cancer at 29 degrees in the 8th and Moon/Pluto at the top of my chart though in the 9th house (0 degree Virgo Moon). I loved taking care of them so much I though when I “retire” I’d do Home Care part time. But caring for my own parents was the most precious experience.

  11. I feel and know down to the bone, I will be a caregiver for my parents if they someday need someone to care for them. I have already made the promise in ny heart and I am bound to it. I have a Pisces Sun and Moon H8. Saturn in Scorpio conjunct I.C. Saturn opposite Aries Venus and Aries Mars.

    I seriously have no doubt in my mind and no hesitation at all. I think about it all the time.

  12. With Saturn in Cancer in 12th opposing Venus in Cap in 6th, I feel as though It’s a karmic condition, I always end up providing care for others, I have even worked with Hospice patients, as well as my own elderly parents . Sometimes I feel resentment, but I realize nurturing is certain in my chart.

  13. Virgo Sun(12th) with Virgo Ascendant, Mars in Cancer in 10th, Jupiter in Pisces(6th) with Chiron, Taurus Moon in 8th. South node in Aquarius. One astrologer looked at my chart for the first time and gazed wide eyed at me and said “Youre a healer”
    I laughed and said “not in this lifetime”. North Node in Leo

  14. Hello. I’m a respiratory therapist and hospice caregiver.

    My sun is in libra. I have a pisces moon and capricorn ascendant. My need to take care of and or try and save animals and ppl, started when I was a upung child.

    I have an uncanny way of seeing, knowing and hearing things from the “other side” …

  15. One thing that I recently realized is that its not just about taking care of the person, but everything that they took care of- pets, house, finances, even their relationships.

    I never thought Id be the caregiving type until recently. Ive been helping my mom take care of my stepdad. I think it doesnt just take a nurturing quality, but a managerial/organizational/Capricorn quality. I know that service is technically a Virgo/Pisces thing, but caregiving really is a leadership position as well. At least from what Ive seen.

    • That’s actually how my healthcare career started out, by taking care of family and everything associated with it that you talked about. It’s definitely a balancing act!

  16. my pisces sun venus in 12th, moon mars saturn in cancer in fourth, neptune jupiter libra in 7th so most of my life had been caring for others but the past few months I have pulled back to care for myself first and then go visit my two elderly neighbours who do have family but rarely visit. My ex Aries partner taught me that you ahev to look after yourself before you can look after others without exausting yourself. and his is self love and in todays world we must take more responsibility to care for ourselves. The moon I find is a good indicator of what we ‘need’ on a personal level. i stay i bed on laptop with lots of tea until my body says Ok that’s enough time to get up and ‘do’. Others think I’m a bit odd and one accused me of laziness but at 73 who cares. Im the only one paying my bills, maintaining my home and garden, recycling water in a drought, making all myown clothes, doing woodwork bla bla bla 🙂 🙂 Love yourselves kids

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