“In for a penny, in for a pound”.
It’s occurred to me this is a good philosophy to apply to love relationships in that if you’re going to love someone, then love them!
I wrote this post a dozen years ago. I run across these old post when cleaning up the side.
At the time, my husband said he intended to tell our son, when he got around to asking…
“Kiss the girl you like. No sense kissing the girl you don’t like. Find the one you want and put everything you have into it…”
My husband has been this way his whole life. I think it’s served him. But today I see that all three of our children have adopted this idea. They’re very serious regarding their commitment to their partner(s). You may lose in relationship but it won’t be for lack of trying!
“In for a penny, in for a pound.” What do you think?
I am all for unconditional love – but it helps if the object of one’s affection is aware of this! I became aware of this very recently when I felt I had given this incredible gift of love to my husband and was extremely put out when nothing registered on the Richter Scale of his emotions. Feeling confident that I had given nothing less than a completely selfless act of unconditional love he looked puzzled and said that in fact he had interpreted my words as an attack on his manhood! What? Where did that come from?! Thought I. Anyway it meant that we were able to open up channels of communication between the sexes and between lifelong partners which had not been explored before. Wants me want to give more quality than quantity next time!
Yes yes yes! Over the past few years I’ve had a major Saturn transit as well as Neptune transit over my Venus. It’s really taught me the value of commitment and unconditional love. I’ve really thrown myself into my relationship, and I’ve never been happier.
spinner – LOL. I don’t know how that happens. Sometimes I check and there are 10 comments the trash but you seem especially lucky along with Heather M and a few other (Dina comes to mind)… everything they write goes south pretty reliably. I wonder sometimes about your charts..
Funny, that has always been a favorite expression of mine, even though I don’t hear it used much….
Hmmmm, what if you don’t know if they love you? What then? (still sighing)
An Irish expression for gambling or committing funds to a project? It speaks of committment. Committing to love your partner as much as you possibly can sounds great. I am all for it. With love sometimes it’s a gamble but one I am willing to take.
my ball went into the gutter again
thanks elsa p
Could it be my wood burning computer model?
Now if I can only just find someone else that would agree with that. I don’t understand this take it slow, no commitment type of “love”. It makes no sense.
Elsa, you are always so refreshing. I love this thought!
I’ve always used that expression when someone was talking about whether or not they should have more kids. I kind of felt that since I was already committed to parenting I might as well make it worth my while. 😉
I recently adopted the IFaPIFaP philosophy in regard to love. I can’t really say why… maybe cos the man is so good… maybe cos I’m ready to grow as a human being. maybe both.
I know Elsa called it giving someone a “free pass.” I decided to do that cos I believe in his innate goodness. even if I lose my shirt, I’m all in. it seems like the right thing to do
Oh, and that quote reminds me of John Adams: “The only two creatures of value on this earth are those with the commitment, and those who require the commitment of others.” Like — you’re in, or you’re out.
I weigh my investments these days. I used to just chuck my pound around like it was meaningless.
ewinbee– my thought is not what the penny/pound are worth, that’s the bet. it’s what are the overall stakes of the game. if the pot’s something unique of great value… you throw in the pound.
I have heard of it, but not incorporated it, I like it though. I think it will help. Thanks Elsa, you are so awesome.
Absolutely! Either do it, or don’t, but don’t pussy foot about it. 🙂
Yeah, no half assin’. I’m in it to win it!
well, yes, if you’re going to see if something works, you better put some energy into it. what kind of love requires no energy?
i guess it depends on how much one values relationship, but i think love itself is something sacred and should be treasured as such….
My mom told me once and it stuck,
“Love doesn’t come with ultimatums ,
If,but, I ,three little words that don’t
Fit with love.“Love is a power a mighty
Power, love is love
She also told me and it sunk in deep
“Oh honey(with her famous wink)
We don’t sing the blues ,we twist
To Jazz”,ok you all have a twisty jazzy Sunday
With Venus in Capricorn, I definitely have this attitude. Unfortunately, I also have Mars conj. Neptune which doesn’t give me the best radar in picking out the best men. But I did find one (though it’s a stormy tumultuous relationship half the time) and no matter what happens, until or if and when it’s over, I’m in – I did leave him once and for a good reason but a few years have mellowed him a bit and I just keep forgiving (or apologizing) and we go on – but for how long is uncertain.But this time, I won’t be doing the leaving.