Depressed And Unhappy

Dear Elsa,

I recently accepted a commission in the United States Navy and will be joining as soon as I graduate from law school this year. This summer, I worked as a Navy prosecutor and I loved it. I was energized, inspired, physically fit and very happy with my life.

But when I returned to school, everything fell apart. I got diagnosed with cervical cancer, and then I fell into an incredibly emotionally draining love triangle of sorts. One man I had to leave behind; I know I can never be with him because of our career paths. Another one can’t decide what he wants in life.

I am depressed, and generally unhappy. I feel like I am trapped; this whole year is turning out to be a waste of energy. I want to believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but right now nothing seems to be working out the way I want.

Sign me,
Going Downhill

Dear Downhill,

I’m sorry things aren’t working out the way you want. Life is like that sometimes, but this is not necessarily bad. The things you describe are sort of the stuff that happens when you’re alive. And it’s not that I don’t feel compassion for you, because I do!

I’m looking at your chart, and it’s my job to tell you things I think will be of use. You have a lot of Virgo in your chart, and I am sure you aspire to live a perfectly executed life. You probably manage this to a larger degree than most, but there are times – like now – when all hell is going to break loose.

Now as a means to cope, I want to appeal to your intellect. I am sure that you see people around you get involved in relationships that are not so good. They go into them, they go through them (getting their hair messed up in the process) and they get out of them – often mangled to one extent or the other. But if you check them later down the road, they can frequently tell you what they learned.

The same goes with an illness and I’ll use myself as an example. Some years ago I was with my children at their pediatrician’s office, when a fire broke out in the building. I’d just had a baby and I was quite out of shape – so when I ran down the stairs carrying my two children plus a baby carrier, I tore my back up.

This left me in chronic pain with torn discs and some other problems. I was not very happy! But the event sent me to physical therapy and eventually to a gym, where I worked out diligently – basically fighting my way back. It’s six years later now and I am pain free. I am also in the best shape of my life, and if it took that fire to get me here, so what?

Now I’m not comparing that to cancer! I’m just saying, “Shit happens”. It’s how we learn. It’s how we grow and make progress. These failed relationships are just a piece of the much larger person you are becoming. Consider yourself a diamond being cut. And one more thing.

Van Morrison sings about God, but you can call it whatever, I don’t care.

“He’ll pick you up
And turn you around
Put your feet back
On higher ground…”

So the next time you’re trying to go right and your life takes a hard left, consider it might be a detour to higher ground. Good Luck.

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