The Value Of Charisma

Prior post on Chiron and charisma – You Can’t Buy Charisma

My husband and I watch TV together and we see things so differently. Our Mercuries oppose (100 + posts on Aries vs Libra). Things that are important to me are not a consideration to him.

As an example, we’re watching all these crime solving shows on Netflix lately. I enjoy some of them but quickly lose interest in the stories when they are poorly told by people who lack charisma.

The animated Italian kid talking with heartfelt candor about his girlfriend who had been murdered, engaged me. The person who is generic and predictable did not. I wind up sitting through the latter stories wondering why I am sitting through the stories at all.

In contrast, my husband doesn’t notice anything on this level, at all. He just doesn’t see why charisma is important in this context.

Without charisma, a person does not inspire me to care about their loved one. It’s a bunch of dry facts about a horrible thing and I just want to get away. I realize this is probably not pc to say, but it’s my reaction. Likewise when the cops on these programs lack energy or brains, an an appealing way of communicating, I am just bored out of my mind.

Because my husband couldn’t care less, I’ve concluded I place a high value on charisma. Perhaps it’s too high, I don’t know.

How important is charisma to you? Are you more like my husband or me?
Also, how do you think you got to be the way you are?

24 thoughts on “The Value Of Charisma”

  1. I’m more inclined to be like you in this regard. But, I have a lot of Libra making charm and charisma important. I just don’t become engaged if someone dones on and on. I agree with what you said about the police or other professionals coming off less than intelligent or articulate. UGH. I switch off my brain immediately and usually with disgust and a great deal of disappoitnment.
    I have Merc in Scorpio in the 9th. Even if it is a good story, if the storyteller sucks I’m not interested.

  2. My husband calls these shows “brain teasers” and thinks all that matters are the facts. I see his point (as always, I have Libra), but tend to leave my body when bored. My way makes it difficult to get through school. A boring teacher going on an on…ugh. Not that I think this is good or anything.

    In my case, I think I got my values from my father, and to a lessor extent, my mother. “It is a sin to bore people” is one of her quotes, but it was my father really loathed a bore and I think I inherited this from him.

  3. “My way makes it difficult to get through school.”

    I was thinking the same thing. Especially in reference to history classes. Dates, dates, and more dates? I learned nothing! With the exception of one class where the teacher really brought history to life. We studied the holocaust and politics in that class mainly. But, he is the only one I could learn from.

  4. No, I completely agree. I check out when people can’t communicate to me effectively. I suppose that is charisma that I’m looking for.

  5. I don’t care if they have charisma or not. If somone can’t tell me a story in 2 minutes or less, I’m out. Sun and Merc in Aries.

  6. I see his point too but I have Venus in Leo sextile Merc in Gem and I like to be entertained and it better be good 🙂 Mercury in 10 can pay attention but it’s very hard when a person is dull. And was hard in school. Facts on paper that are dull still interest me because I can absorb them directly. But a dull person is quite tough.

  7. This is so interesting to me Elsa, especially since you are terming it ‘charisma.’ I know exactly what you are talking about, but I have always characterized it as more being able to empathize or emotionally engage with said person. I find I’m this way when reading a book, whether it is fiction or non-fiction, or watching a movie or TV. And thinking about it, it includes people I am talking to, face to face. Most TV programs and movies leave me cold. The only one I ever got into recently was Desparate Housewives. I was amazed at myself, but I honestly cared about and empathized with everyone on that show. When I am engaged emotionally, I’m really into whatever it is…for instance, I actually wept when I finished the book SEABISCUIT, because I was so sorry it was over. One of my favorite movies is TOOTSIE. But again, it is because I was totally engaged in a man becoming a woman and seeing how ‘the other half lived.’ 🙂

  8. We have watched a lot of these shows and for me it is definitely charisma. I am thinking about this deeply, at this point because my response is so marked.

    We did have card games out in the desert and when someone with no juice showed up, we would not really want them to come back, even if they were a poor card player, lol. In my family, this is pretty profound.

    I think this may actually be my currency. Like say you’re from a rich family and the people you associate with need to be at or around your level of income to fit in. In my family, charisma is thing.

  9. I never realized but yes I am turned off by lack of charisma. I’m attracted to people who possess it. I guess that’s the nature of charisma though:)

  10. Avatar
    learningtoground

    My mercin Aries opposes my Pluto in libra both squaring jup in cap. I agree with you Elsa and would add that I have to feel the strength and power of the person as well. I know they are just “make believe” but they have to make me believe it or I switch it off. Merc also trines my Neptune.

    One example is csi Miami vs csi new York. Miami doesn’t hold me at all. In fact the main guy(can’t remember his name) irritates the he’ll out of me.

  11. “I think this may actually be my currency.” I get this! In my culture we have a word for that and it literally could translate to “without breath.”

    Good morning chew, Elsa. I wonder about this a lot when I see my son with the blood of both these cultures and lots of Libra dealing with fitting in to the games played in the different camps.

  12. I will watch some detective/cop/mystery shows only because I like the main characters. I don’t find anyone on Law and Order interesting, though, so I glaze over when that show is on.

  13. Mercury in scorpio in 5th house, part of a grand trine with jupiter and moon-saturn conjunction…i am madlly atracted to puzzles of all kinds and i watch detective stories love to find out how they solved the mistery…was very good in maths and still am …

  14. I generally dislike most cop shows as a rule. I really don’t like law enforcement period from cops clear up to Judges. However I do like NCIS,Fringe, ALPHA’s, and Sherlock Holmes. Real life investigations the highly publicized murder cases between the media and the cops they make me furious. Cop shows that are reenactments of real cases will irritate me beyond belief.

    I suppose if it is a show the story has to be well written with intelligence, good has to prevail and that kind of thing so charisma is important. The true crime shows would annoy me and my husband as well.

  15. Oh yeah, charisma is very important to me. There are a lot of “vanilla” people out there

    I like that show “Snapped” a lot, though sometimes someone who has committed terrible crimes can be boring as hell. It’s a conundrum. Locked-up Abroad is just great though!

  16. Oh boy, charisma is essential to me. Anyone who lacks it soon bores me rigid after a short while – that’s why I spend so much time on my own these days. On the other hand I can put up with a lot from a man with charisma – the Man has it in spades… So did the Artist, the Actor, the Italian, the Arab and FGL…

    I agree totally about cop shows or other fictions where the protagonists lack charisma. ER went quickly downhill when certain main characters loft. NCIS is infinitely watchable for me because ‘Gibbs’ has such charisma – so do three or four of the other main characters.

    And similarly, I can’t read novels unless the characters are rounded and the writing good – trash like The Da Vinci Code may have a good plot but it leaves me cold without interesting people and a good command of English. I have to care about the fate of the characters… As the Actor once said to me, explaining why he’d turned down starring roles in certain kinds of blockbusters “They don’t make me laugh and they don’t make me cry – they don’t make me FEEL”

  17. Chiron is related to charisma. Maybe the woundedness is vanilla society smackin’ down the one who dares to be emotive. The one jot willing to be boring. Hmmm?

  18. Oh, it’s about real people? And I was here preparing to post about a British crime series where I found the acting of the main character captivating, could feel her pain gripping my throat (and usually I felt nothing like this watching crime series -with very few exceptions-, no matter how brilliant the plot). Meh, maybe it would help someone bored during isolation. Happy Valley- a really good show. Hint- it’s not happy at all.

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