Trick Questions And The Death Of Earnest Opinions

mazeI’m more and more aware of people asking tricky questions.

They’re tricky because the person is asking, but in truth they’re only going accept one answer – theirs!

It’s double or triple trouble for me, because I am a paid consultant. I’m paid to be forthright. In consultations, I have obligation to deliver my level of integrity which is high.  But it’s increasingly obvious to me that if I speak up in the general world, I’ll be obliterated.

I’m tired of this. I am tired of offering my earnest opinion and being punished for it. I don’t think I’m alone in this.

People constantly have their own realities reflected back at them. It’s no wonder they can’t find their way out the maze. They live in a hall of mirrors and it’s just not real.

Where do you fit in this?

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Trick Questions And The Death Of Earnest Opinions — 36 Comments

  1. I have had to deal with this myself. It’s as if I give the real deal answer I am old and out of date. I have lived long enough to know right from wrong. I have had enough experience making mistakes to be able to tell the complete outcome of a terrible mistake in the making but yet I am outcast and punished for saying what I know to be the truth.

    I don’t try to tell people how they should feel. I just tell them fact for fact what is going to happen if they ____ fill in the blank. If I haven’t made the mistake I sure have lived long enough to know someone who has and I don’t run around offering up advice….to each his own but I can imagine if I were paid to give what I can honestly see how this would be a huge problem.

    I have had to step back and let my children fail. They have to have a little failure to be able to understand what it really means but when they ask me and I give them the true and real answer then I am ridiculed or shut out for a few weeks I have to wonder why they even ask at all.

    As it turns out, the thing will happen and they will get a pie in the face. They want the reality that is in their head and they want me to communicate that back to them. Well, I just cant do it. So I am punished. I mean they think they are punishing me. If it isn’t life or death anymore, I let them go….go ahead. Do it. You’ll see.

    I am not going to answer any more of their or anyone else’s trick questions. I am just going to say ….hmmmm I really don’t know. But I can see how that would be a huge problem if it were my job.

    I have called you. I asked hoping for answers and got completely different answers than what I thought I would get but it helped me pull my head out of my ass and see things for what they really were because I was too close to it and couldn’t see it.

    I am always ready to hear the truth. Sometimes when you are emotionally disabled you couldn’t find the answer if it were pasted to your forehead. I was happy and it helped me turn things around. As it was, I was sinking fast doing things my way.

  2. It’s never one size fits all. Every thing is absolutely subjective…even paid consultants highest deliverance.

    The ways of the world let alone astrology and how it affects us can been seen from a gazillion perspectives. Nothing is certain and that includes astrology…sometimes it is spot on and sometimes it is completely untruthful.

    I look at Nature for the highest learning and to change my perspectives. Nature will reflect back the most fundamental ways of how the universe works.

    Reality of the cycles of life are very disturbing and tough to navigate, they make you thick. As if the tender part of you thickens up and becomes stalkier & bitter…just like plants as they age. Sweet tender new growth inevitably becomes stalky and bitter with age….simple, natural and real.

  3. Today’s post coincided with my daily meditation and I would like to share the meditation:

    Elder’s Meditation of the Day – April 29
    “The old people came literally to love the soil and they sat or reclined on the ground with a feeling of being close to a mothering power…The soil was soothing, strengthening, cleansing and healing…”
    — Luther Standing Bear, OGLALA SIOUX

    Have you ever noticed the relationship between children and the soil? Watch how happily they are touching the dirt. The children play in it and eat it. If you are stressed, go to a spot on the Earth, sit down, put your fingers in the dirt, dig in it. Wash your hands in the soil. When you touch it, notice what it does to your hands. Our bodies love to touch the Earth. Sometimes we get too busy and forget these simple things. Maybe you’ll even want to plant a garden or flowers. These things are mentally healthy.

    Great Spirit, today, let me touch the Earth so the Earth can touch me.

    Get your garden put in and focusing on what is real and tangible have great importance to success and Peace.

  4. I agree; taking the time to give someone a thoughtful answer based off of ‘whatever’ and then having the person completely disregard it to go with what they already wanted to go with is such a waste of time.

    I have a relative who does this. She will take the time to ask everyone the same question, even go so far as to assume during the conversation what you are going to say, and then completely disregard anything you said; in fact, she often goes for the opposite of what someone will say. Some of it is personal opinion stuff, but other things…like the tried and true process of something (I can’t think of a good abstract), she will cozy up to you and put on the front of how much she values your experience, only to go behind your back and mock what you said about it.

    I want to call this Uranus type energy, because it is full of rebellion. I don’t know. But it is such a huge waste of time, and can hurt your feelings when you take the time to be careful and articulate your words and try to speak directly to their situation.

    It’s like, if you want a mirror for your answer, just tell me, and I’ll go get one and hold it up and there you go…

    • “It’s like, if you want a mirror for your answer, just tell me, and I’ll go get one and hold it up and there you go…”

      I don’t even do that.
      I see a circle jerk, I leave ’em to their business. I’m not getting involved!

      • Yep! I have stopped answering questions when I know they don’t want the truth or my opinion. I have also found that if people don’t want to answer a question or if I ask for clarification on something and I am challenging their information in any sort of way, I am just ignored. It is so weird, but I am getting used to it. Just living in my own private Idaho 😉

    • Well, I don’t mock what people say, but… as embarrassing as it is, (and in spite of , until today, never having that same complaint from anybody else… yet), my father has always accused me of doing that to him: “and then completely disregard anything you said; in fact, she often goes for the opposite of what someone will say”.

      I’ve never did it to hurt or diminish him in anyway, and I didn’t even really notice it, if he didn’t said so. I remember that my reaction was to feel a little annoyed, and feeling that his ego was quite bruisable, if he didn’t get the power and authority that I was convinced he deemed was his entitlement…

      I know, I know, I asked, but… I still thought that his reaction was because he had too much of an ego (a mars in Aires, Cap moon, Taurus ascendant with it ruler, Venus in Leo).

      And yes, I do have Uranus type energy, with a pint of Jupiter. Mars and Venus in Aqua. Uranus conjunct Mercury, ans sextile Venus, Sag Sun and Mercury, Jupiter in the 1st.

  5. I’m glad you maintain your integrity and give out real answers. I don’t regularly follow any other astrology blogs because in general I’m not a fan of “new age” stuff and I feel like you are actually grounded in reality. So I appreciate it.

  6. >>They want the reality that is in their head and they want me to communicate that back to them. <<

    EXACTLY. Since New Years, I've had several specific experiences with people where they did not, or could not, hear what I just said, things I honestly hoped and believed, and offered in good faith and good intention, would help to elucidate their situation for them. I didn't, and wasn't, going to do the work for them–I offered a key that might unlock a door. But if they're not willing to take the key from you and stick it in a lock to see if it works… I'm noticing lately that they don't even say "hey, you're holding a key" or even, "did you say that was a key? That's not a key!" anymore. They just keep on talking–literally, with *no acknowledgement* of what you just said–telling themselves the same old story that isn't working for them.

    I know it's not ultimately my job to solve other peoples' problems. But if someone *tells* me their problem–and especially if they are asking me for money as a means of solving their problem–I'm not going to sit there like a cardboard cutout with a frozen smile on my face. Often the problem is a structural one (hello, Saturn), and maybe the structure needs to collapse so they can re/build a better one. Maybe we should just be getting out of the way, instead? I don't know. Especially when it's your "baby," or your actual child, it's hard to just sit by and watch them suffer. It's something that most healers and counselors have to figure out how to deal with, it seems.

    Happened just yesterday, in fact. Someone asked for money to support a venture that, I am told, is floundering. This person has strong Pisces energy in their chart, and I asked if it was possible that Neptune's transit to their sun/sun sign was diffusing their identity, and that people weren't paying for the product anymore because they can't quite grasp what it has morphed into. The reply showed me that they were stuck on the fact that their chart is "set up for success"–and at the root of things, it likely is–but in our conversation, they were not able to acknowledge the effect of a slow outer planet transit on even a "great" chart. Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong, ***but to not even look into it, or consider it?*** This person knows enough to know better, IMO. But there again, Neptune, clouding the issue… which is another clue in and of itself … [sigh].

  7. I think everyone is pretty single mindedly set on their ‘vision’ for the future right now and can’t see the forest for the trees. It’s Saturn in Sag. Sag is the know-it-all of the Zodiac; they have a *tendency* to believe their truth is the only truth. Anything which registers to them as ‘negative’ (even if it’s not really) and at odds with the vision they have for greener pastures, is going to (if they only stay positive and optimistic-tehe) make certain people turn away from advice. I can see people really want to hear “You can do it! Go for it!” right now, above all. Sag isn’t a common sense sign, unfortunately. Ah well, people will have to learn some things the hard way.

  8. Hi Elsa… I know what you mean. The last few days I somehow think Neptune is growing stronger. I feel and see it around me and inside of me. I am dealing with illusions coming back to me. But I am a very open and honest person, so I ask for the truth and nothing but the truth. But hey I’m capricorn with aquarius ASC and MC in sagittarius. There is no other way…. be proud of yourself and speak your truth. If people can’t handle it, it’s their problem. And they will think about it longer.
    Greets!

  9. I’ve just come to a point where I question myself, deeply, before I decide to talk.
    “Does this person really want to hear anything I have to say?”

    Most times, the answer is no. When it’s yes, I speak freely. This is not the easiest thing (for me) to do, but it’s working.

    • I respect you for the work that you do and the challenges you face in regards with communication. Some people just need to hear it straight! You did your part with all your integrity, years of knowledge and wisdom. It’s all up to them how they want to use the information you provided to them. It’s tough not only with consultants but with anyone who wants to give sound advice like doctors. Not everyone will support or agree on what you have to say.

  10. Some people are not good at managing their own expectations. If I don’t meet their expectation, it’s my fault! I’ve experienced this with people who have no boundaries, and don’t know where they end and I begin. I tend to avoid interacting with them at all.

  11. I dont ususally venture out of my bubble, my 10 mile radius between work, home and shopping. when I do, I usually end up hurt,frustrated,envious or a multitude of emotions and have to run back home to process,recoup and analyze. most of life doesnt meet my expectations,but for some reason I alsways expect great and it usually ends up not so great.

  12. I have Mercury conjunct Mars in Leo in 10th. I don’t sugarcoat nothing. I offend people quite often because the truth cuts into them like a knife, especially superiors and authority figures. I tell them things that hurt like “You are not leading effectively.” CUE THE EGO WARS! I automatically get blamed for being childish, egotistical and self-centered. In a sense, I reflect all their own childish, egotistical and self-centeredness right back at them. I’m like “Yes you are this.” and their like, “NO! I’m not this!” The authority figure becomes a spoiled 5 year-old child in front of me, declaring that they are the boss and that they are right. Wow…just wow.

  13. There are very few people who want to hear or are capable of processing truth. It is too bad but most people have not yet evolved enough to seek out answers to recognise their flaws and move towards transformation on any level. You answer peoples questions in truth , honesty and integrity. I think that the key to the conundrum is to not become invested in the growth and change of others. It is always an investment with an extremely low return. It does not reflect on you negatively when people do not want to know themselves. I figure it is not yet in the sphere of their learning in this lifetime, not in their mission yet but someday after many lifetimes and learning it will be. We are all facing this problem, I have been cognizant of this for a long time but I have learned that I have to detach from the trick questions. It is a game and I do not want to lay my money on the outcome or I end up broke. People are usually seeking to prop up the lies they tell themselves.it is what it is unfortunately.

  14. This is so so so true — “I am tired of offering my earnest opinion and being punished for it. I don’t think I am alone in this.”

    You are not alone, and like the others reading here, I thank you for saying this out loud, succinctly, truthfully, and well. I feel sometimes like even if I ask a question people think I want my own thoughts in answer. Nope! I like to hear others’ views too!

    What a world this is becoming!

  15. Maybe they are looking more for confirmation of what they already believe. After the past few years of destruction, a lot of people are grasping for something to hold onto.

  16. in our February reading, you told me to show that a certain person was extremely impaired in relationships. I didn’t want to do it because I hate confrontation being a Libra. Four or five of my planets are in Libra,including my ascendant. but I did what you told me to do anyways as painful as it was because I wanted the outcome that we discussed. I got my outcome and I also grew a bigger set of balls.

  17. You wouldn’t compromise your professional integrity. Expectations people have today seem a bit off sometimes, and they voice their expectations with no understanding of what’s real.

  18. My closest people to me say I never hear what they say and do what they say. But when it comes to strangers I do. Its such a pity. And when you talk I listen. Its like its too close for comfort. I have the opposite problem. Usually when someone gives me advice, & I mean anyone I sweep it under the rug deal with it later and learn the hard way. I don’t like that about myself. But its because I’m lazy. So at least I’m honest about that, but that don’t cost me anything.

  19. You told me to basically let go of what’s not working for me with my painful realizations squashing my old dreams (music industry) and I did like 80-95% in my heart. My heart feels like its dead set on following Vet studies. Everyday its a reality. Its gnawing and growing on my heart. So that’s my new dream. That’s what you inclined me to do. Wasn’t so lazy on that one.

  20. I used to do that. Ask when I already had my answer. I lacked confidence needed someone else to give me the go ahead, right or wrong. It’s no way to live! Don’t do that!

  21. Yes, we live in a selfie world. Doesn’t have to be that way so it’s good people remind us of another way to be. Thanks for the reminder!

  22. It’s two years later – I have been discussing this in my real life. This phenomena has become very distinct and defined. It’s super Commie. You’re asked a question and if you answer it incorrectly, it’s off to the gulag with you! Free speech is dead.

  23. I continue to revisit this post.

    I don’t encounter as many trick questions these days. Questions designed to entrap a person! I’m not sure why this is.

    I don’t know if it is happening less, or happening to me less. What do you think?

  24. You get what you pay for and sometimes you don’t. If a question will have only one answer for someone, perhaps they shouldn’t be seeking advice from anyone other than themselves. This kind of thing always exists, not only for astrology advice. No rules with astrological or any kind of advice, paying for it does not mean a customer has to or will agree with the advice. Those who have a disagreement with the advice can study astrology for themselves and learn much more than focusing on one specific thing. The general world doesn’t pay for astrology advice anyway, so no fear of obliteration. This is not a trend, it’s a personality type, but if that’s somehow a problem, don’t take the trick questions. Some people just like to play games.

    • I wasn’t talking about consultations at all or advice. I was talking about conversations in real life, on and offline that have nothing to do with astrology. 🙂

      • Ha, the mention of being a paid consultant threw me off. ? Questions designed to entrap, offering an earnest opinion and being punished for it? Same answer, don’t answer the trick question, or develop a disclaimer. If this tactic has lessened perhaps it has run its course. Have a relative that does this, placed them in the nut category, we don’t speak.

  25. You’re on point, Elsa! As usual. People have learned how to curate their life to be as comfortable and controlled as possible.

    Person they don’t like? Blocked.
    Subject they don’t like? Unfollowed.
    News they want to hear? Read only biased sites.
    Opinions they don’t like? Censor them. Hang out with the yes men
    The big bad world is scary? Hide out from adulting!

    Anything that looks like it can break people’s comfort zone WILL be treated as a threat.

    The internet and social media has made things larger but also much smaller. Imagine being a nutrition coach to a morbidly obese person and them insisting they need to largely eat fat because it’s “good” for them?? Well, they can google any “researched” information on a wacky cutting-edge diet that grants them their confirmation bias, however much it flies in the face of sound and balanced nutrition principles. Why? Because they’re always right. Duh. ??‍♀️

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