I’ve been learning a lot lately, a little too much, perhaps. When you learn something new, provided it’s deep enough, you may be compelled to go back over your past experiences so you can better understand them. This is not always comfortable.
I have had a lot of experiences in my life. Many of them are uncanny. If you’re adventurous, you can find yourself in all kinds of circumstances. You don’t necessarily know what you’re getting involved in. I’ve been in over my head so many times.
Yesterday, as I was mulling new information, I recalled this dinner I had once, in a restaurant I didn’t know existed, although it was in my home town which I knew like the back of my hand. It was a secret or private restaurant, I guess. I went there with, The Blond. I decided to revisit this story.
I used to write stories. I’m a pretty good astrologer but I’m an even better storyteller and all my stories are true. I wrote about, The Blond and the experience I had, nearly twenty years ago. I just wrote the truth. I always write the truth. I have Mars and Mercury in my 9th house. I hate lies. I loathe them.
Anyway, I loved telling stories but I was sooo stupid when I wrote them. I was stupid when I lived the events the stories recall as well and this is where I have regret.
No, I don’t regret writing the stories. It was SO FUN. I regret that I have lost so much of my naivete! I wrote like an idiot child, wide open, with no fear or filter. The stories are funny even if they’re horrific. They’re honest. I’m just saying, something is lost along with your innocence. I used to think it was okay to be me.
I decided to look at the old story. I also decided to post the beginning of it so you can see what’s happened to me. I’m going to link it but I warn you, I swear like a son-of-a-bitch in this.
It’s how I write! I am able to recall dialogue, verbatim, from decades past. I don’t know why I can do this but I can. So when I was nineteen, I swore a lot. Don’t click if you think my authentic (teenage) voice might offend you. The Blond.
Back to my point, I’m really going to weigh (Libra) this going forward. I may not want to go forward. I may prefer to go back. Perhaps I know more than necessary as it is!
All these planets will turn direct, shortly. I stand here on this (internal) precipice.
How naïve are you? Is there an upside?