My husband and I have been going to classes for about six months. The last two meetings have been about marriage. We wrap up the part on marriage this section this Sunday. The final section is, “Till death do we part”. Venus Pluto, eh?
Anyway, Catholics marry to raise a family. This is one of the defined purposes of marriage. You get together and raise your kids. My husband I have fulfilled this. Our marriage is now focused on the second purpose. We provide each other company and companionship. It’s so simple and so powerful.
I’m writing about this because Saturn is in Sagittarius. We’ve to visualize our future (Sagittarius) and make plans to manifest it (Saturn). If you’re single, you might want to ask yourself if you want be and have a companion in your old(er) age.
I mention this because I had a client; she’s involved with a man who seems to be “running her clock out,” if you know what I mean.
If your partner won’t commit and if you know you want company as you age, this is probably worth mulling.
Where do you stand on this subject?
I’ve been with my husband for 40 years. I’m a Libra rising and he’s a Libra. We never thought about our relationship in terms of having companionship in our older years, but here we are, two old people in our 60’s. Marriage is a journey that you take together. No matter who you’re with, you’ll have good times and bad. Marriage is always a work in progress. It takes honest communication.
There were times I could have ended my marriage, but I didn’t and today I’m happy with my decision. Our marriage is very comfortable now. We’ve worked through our problems. We’re like two old friends that have lots of pleasant memories together and some bad ones. We look back and laugh at some things we did. Our companionship means so much to me at this time in my life. Its easier to be old together, IMO.
When I met my husband he was non-committal to anything other than dating. We dated for over a year until I decided to give him an ultimatum that if this is all it will ever be, I’m moving on (I have Mars in Libra in the 1st house). I had to take a chance and rolled the dice that we had the real deal. We didn’t see each other for a couple a months and then one day he called and explained he was afraid to get more serious, but after thinking about it, he wanted to try. So, we moved in together to give a try.
If you’re dating someone you think has potential, eventually you have to have a serious talk about where your relationship is going. Give it 6 months and if its not going to be what you want, you have to move on. It doesn’t feel good to take a chance, but better to know now than to waste any more time.
I thought I would have a companion in my older age. Just 3 months after our 23rd anniversary my husband died and left me to raise our then 6 yr old daughter. It has been 9 yrs now and I will turn 53 in a couple days. Honestly I believe to be my age with a daughter just entering high school puts me in an unusual place and it just isn’t in the stars for me to be married again. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a relationship kind of woman with a stellium in Cancer and Libra rising and I adore men. I just feel to tired emotionally to start over from scratch with someone new but I do miss having that companionship, support, and shared history ever so much.
I’m sorry for your loss. 🙁
Feel for you too, Tamara.
I have Uranus in the 7th, a ton of Aries in the fourth and moon Pluto in the eighth…many excuses/reasons to be solo. Always thought being independent/alone was THE way to go. Yet. Somehow, we are coming up on 30 years married. “thanks be to God” as my grandma would have said.
Busted! Best thing ever happened to me. True love, such joy.
Don’t forget to have fun.
From a purely pragmatic standpoint, I suppose one may set goals about experiencing love, as one does about any other life ambitions, and that may be the smart and sensible thing to do, so you do not “run out your clock” if that particular love is not available to you. But sometimes one feels deep love for someone whether or not it is convenient or appropriate or fits into a neatly structured life plan. You can choose to block it, perhaps, or refuse to nourish it and maybe it will die over time, but I am not sure that process can be put on a timetable–like grief, which also takes its own time. That (mostly feminine) fear that time is running out, better grab somebody before it’s too late, to my mind really only applies if you want children–there is a biological clock, but not an emotional one. People find true love at all different ages and stages of life. I’d rather wait for someone I deeply and passionately love than be with someone just to have a relationship. Friendships are fine for companionship, and some can turn into love, but love is different and you know it when you feel it. No replacement for that. I am reminded of the song lyrics from West Side Story, when Maria sings, “When love comes so strong, there is no right or wrong, your love is…your love.” We’ll, depending on the life circumstances there may in fact be right or wrong, but I stand by the second part of the lyric. “Your love is your love.” Clocks don’t matter.
Well said! 🙂
‘Clocks don’t matter’. Thank you !
Marriage is there to alleviate loneliness, lower the amount of STD’s, ensure procreation of our species, and give humans a reason to create drama and/or lament endlessly. Whether it is the lack of suitable partners for marriage, being within the restrictions and responsibilities of a marriage, planning weddings, or mourning a spouse after death or divorce…
Love is a running dialogue. That’s why marriage exists.
Its about love,security and sex.
A woman always has more power when she loves a man a little less than he loves her. From what I’ve observed, a woman who loves less will have a man’s loyalty and passion the way a woman who loves more never will.
once i decided i wanted a partner it was easy to find the man i would marry. which is surreal given how hard it was for me to date before that… (saturn venus neptune)