With Venus square Neptune in my chart, I have lost a lot of money in my life. I give a lot of money away. People steal it from me, they trick me out of it or I let them trick me out of it. It simply leaks out or disappears, one way or the other.
This doesn’t bother me. I don’t know why it doesn’t bother me, exactly, but it doesn’t.
Having a family complicates things. I have a responsibility to my family so I can’t just run around giving away everything I make, though I am pulled to do that.
I was talking to my husband about this the other night, He also gives a lot of money away, but he’s worried about me. He doesn’t think he’ll live long enough to be a burden to anyone. He figures he will die working, basically.
If he does come to a point where he is a burden to society or to anyone for that matter, he says he’ll go out into the woods and live under a poncho until the animals eat him. He’s serious, I’m sure. But what am I going to do? He thinks I should consider this.
His point was well taken, but it did not provide me with clarity. Both my mother and my grandfather died with virtually nothing. See – Inheritance.
My grandfather (Henry – in his own words) had strong Buddhist leanings. My mother was Catholic. Both lived and left this world without attachment to money or material things. I don’t think I can get this way of being out of my blood.
I have a packed 8th house. I have Jupiter involved, even. I’m supposed to inherit, but what I have inherited is their spirituality.
My grandfather agonized over whether or not he should spend money on a $10 transistor radio, so he could hear music when he worked all day in the sun. He felt he should give the $10 to the poor. When you’re exposed to someone like this, it’s impossible to not be influenced by them or at least it’s impossible for me. I can understand my grandfather.
I found this out for sure, a dozen years ago when someone stole all my music. I was shocked, but I recovered quickly. I recovered two hours later when I found myself singing in my car and realized that you can’t actually steal a person’s music.
I have never replaced what was lost. I give the money away and I feel better with no music, if you can believe that. I’m traveling light.
I wonder how this will turn out. I don’t think anyone will be surprised if I die with nothing, but I wonder how I’ll manage this. I tend to think I needn’t worry about it, as it will be managed for me.
I feel a lot better giving things away then I feel keeping them. I don’t know that this is something I can change. I understand it’s not right to give away so much that you become a burden to others. I don’t think I want to go die under a poncho in the woods. However I can think of worse things so I’m not firm on that either.
These things are so personal. Being peculiar, it’s hard to discuss this with people. I doubt people believe me for one thing. I also don’t think I’m ever going to figure this out. It too mysterious.
Here are my questions for you:
Do you have weird ideas about money? Inheritance? Death or dependency? If so, where did you get them?
Also, do they benefit you in some way? How?