I get back from my classes and organization meetings. I begin to watch my favorite show that always put me in a better mood. But then a cold, dark feeling washed over me. Something bad.
I secretly know my boyfriend’s email log in information, along with his Facebook log in information. Immediately, I knew that he had to do with that sudden black cloud.
There’s this girl he worked with over the summer. I was in Tennessee then, at home and he lives in Minnesota (where I got to school). I read their messages on Facebook. They even arranged a lunch date. He’s planning to go spend time with her in South Dakota. But only if “you show me a good time.” He also has her name in his work info stuff. Saying that he also needs to keep her in line because she is a slacker. . . with 😉 after it. He also had asked her if she had a non-school address.
He’s emailing her now?! So I went to check his email and there are two emails from him to her. One: Pictures of him and his penis. And he made a joke about how he said he was gonna fuck law school (the picture was of his penis on the top of the pages of his law book. By the way, they both have interests in law. I am a Biology and Art student. Her response to that email? She went “ugh. I shrieked when I saw and immediately deleted it!” And he went something along the lines of “Aww. Hehe.”
Another email was of more pictures of him. Not his penis, but just really, really good looking pictures of him. One of it even had me in it! Friends also! No reply from her yet. He emailed her while I was away at my classes and meetings. And that last email? While he was talking to me online.
Problem: Before the emails, when I had read about the South Dakota trip and the lunch date, I confronted him about it. I asked him. He said no. That he loves me and only me (we’ve been together for almost two years–it’ll be two in January). That he only wants me and that I am the most beautiful girl he has ever met. Meh, is what I said. We had a small argument over her. And finally, I said, fine, go. Go to SD and go on your little lunch date. I was still irritated but willing to put my trust in him on th line. And, well, fuck. I get this feeling. And I find these emails. He knows that I know about the trio and date because of
her responses— I only get to see hers if I log into my Facebook. But I get to see the convo on both ends if I sign onto his.
Now I am lost as in what to do. I love this man. I have been hurt before. MANY TIMES. My life was Hell before I met him. But now this. . . What the f***? What am I to do? This pressure and pain in my heart makes it even worse. How do I confront him? Should I confront him? What do I do? I have even thought of sending her a Facebook message. But maybe she will tell him and he will get all mad and defensive and shit. Help, please.
Stellium in Scorpio
You are 21 years old. And I may be an old lady out of the loop but if my boyfriend had ever mailed a picture of his penis to another girl when I was your age (never mind pictures I was in), I would have picked him up and thrown him into the next state. It would definitely been the last he ever saw of me, so based on this I find your response baffling. Why would you put up with this?
It goes without saying you have no business logging onto his business. This is a character flaw, you know? You ought to do something about that, but first let’s deal with this man.
I understand you have been with him for 2 years but when something like this happens, as far as I am concerned, you have been with him 2 years too long. Especially when you are 21 and have no tie downs. No children, I mean. So here’s my advice:
Take your stellium in Scorpio that included a Venus Pluto conjunction and amputate. Cut this guy off, cut him off for good and I’ll tell you why.
It’s because he can’t be trusted. You will never trust him and if you can’t trust him, what do you have? Well if you’re a Scorpio, what you’ve got is garbage. Something to set out at the curb… permanently.
You can’t be trusted either, of course. You poke in people’s business, so if I were you I would take this whole thing as a wake up call. Resolve to partner with someone you can trust and to be a trustworthy partner, because this other stuff is going to lead you to nothing but pain and you said you’ve had a lifetime of that, right?
Well I believe you. So get your order of operations down.
Use your spider senses up front to suss out whether or not a person can be trusted. This is something you can know for the most part. If a person can be trusted, proceed carefully. If not ditch them and move to the next. It’s a different application of the same “stealth”, but this guy? He’s got to go. Because there a million men out there who can tell you that you’re the most beautiful. I say, where’s the meat?
His butt and publicized penis (WTFooo????)to the curb so fast your head should be swimming and not worth a backwards glance!
MANY, more worthy of your beauty, fish types in the sea darling!!!
Elsa has given you good advice, do your scanning before you get in so deep! Think back, there must be something about him that made you go poking around to begin with??? Should of gone on red alert then and not went any farther. When you are with the right person there won’t be any pull to snoop.
Life was hell before him? What is it now??
Keep looking – clear him out and make room for some wonderful in your life.
Perhaps a nice decent Virgo chap?
Amen to all of the above. I’ve been there, done that. A guy who pulls that crap is not worth keeping. If you keep him around, you’ll do nothing but turn yourself into a professional paranoid and he’ll do nothing but break your heart.
I’ve asked this before, and I’m still wondering – anyone knows men who snoop? Why do women need to do this? The guy above is crap, but that doesn’t mean he should be snooped on.
its good advice; both are not trustworthy. everyone can change that. even if you do have intuition and feelings about something, i would just let that go and let things be. all in time.
this guy sounds really fliratious and doesn’t seem happy in the current relationship or wants them all, like a casanova. Don juan type. *smh* he probably has this connection with the other woman and spends alot more time with her because of the same career line.
I am kind of in the same situation but understand how she is feeling! me and my boyfriend have been together almost two years also and i know for a fact that he’s cheating but when i bring it up he just deny’s it and says that i should trust him. Well how am i supposed to trust him when i know that he’s lying to me??? its so hard because i put so much trust and time into this relationship and i dont know what to do? does anyone have any advice for me?
If a guy sent me and another girl a picture of his penis, I’d tell him to go to hell!
“would have picked him up and thrown him into the next state.”