Saturn will turn retrograde in Sagittarius on March 14th, 2015. He’ll return to Scorpio the second half of June through the first half of September. Scorpio and the other fixed signs (Taurus, Leo & Aquarius) read this and groan. However, I see this as an opportunity.
Saturn only transits a sign every 28.5 years. If you keep this in mind, you can see this is your last chance to get a grip on Scorpio-themed problems and set yourself up for close to three decades.
Scorpio-themed problems are not boring, that’s for sure. We’re talking about overcoming fear of death, gaining control of your pathology, taking responsibility for your shadow, learning to work with you subconscious and/or your “gut”.
We’re talking about learning to manage your energy of all kinds. Learn to exchange energy, and to not be a drain on others or allow them to drain you. Learn about power struggles and come to terms with the fact there is evil in the world.
Advanced students can learn to transform the negative into something magical, the same way flowers grow from manure. I don’t think of this is concerning. It’s like you’re going to class, hey! May as well try to learn something. I just can’t see suffering and learning nothing. I don’t we’re designed that way.
In whatever case, I feel this period will be significant. It’s the reason I did not have a workshop on Saturn in Sagittarius. I felt it would be premature. It makes a lot more sense to focus on Saturn in Sagittarius once we’re in it and not looking back.
If you want to get the most out of this period, review you copy of my Saturn in Scorpio workshop. If you don’t have one and it’s not out of reach of your budget, I would really consider investing. What you’ll learn from it is priceless, never mind the pain you’ll be spared.
Is there anyone (besides me), looking forward to Saturn’s last gasp in Scorpio?
I’m SO looking forward to this. Saturn in Scorpio definitely forced me to look within and ACKNOWLEDGE my pathology, for real. I had to face the fact that I suffer from an effin personality disorder that was hampering my interpersonal relationships. It was the hardest lesson in my Life so far and I suffered like a motherf’cker but here I am, stronger than ever.
Me too…so much better and stronger. I will take the suffering to finish the process. What doesn’t kill is makes us stronger.
What planets did it hit for you? I had mars, sun, and pluto with a progressed moon in scorpio in the second house in the second in the rotation.
Sunshine888, in my case it was my Progressed Sun, which was/is also conjunct both my natal and progressed Pluto.
PIseas314, I totally agree. If that’s what it takes to be more in control and become whole, then bring it on.
I don’ t look forward to suffer but I know it will be a cleansing – and that is great – scorpio asc 25′
I have Scorpio 7 degrees on my ascendant and am going through my Saturn return. I hate feeling slammed and don’t want to go through this but things need to be finished (divorcing after 25 yrs with this slug)…dealing with his pathology, my pathology and the ‘family’ I created that just didn’t work out.. YET… sigh…
I made a lot of significant relationships during Saturn in Scorpio, especially in the last year of it. I’m hoping this last pass will help me cement those relationships.
No I’m not looking forward to it! I’m at a loss for words as to why anyone would want to go through this transit again.
Tam, I can only speak for myself, I guess I do because I want to close a chapter.
I agree with you, Tam. I’ve had just about enough cosmic planetary mayhem hitting my natal chart in the last several yrs. There comes a breaking point when the flogging & suffering that you’ve endured no longer is a lesson but numbness & permanent bitterness & cynicism. Saturn is the bane of my existence. In Scorpio it’s hell; in Capricorn it will be the end of me, I’m sure.
Well put Eva, at some point you just don’t care anymore. It feels sadistic and mindless. A human that gains consciousness, born to a foreign world, then
having to navigate darkness and corruption only to have some giant force knock the living piss out of them for years on top of a middling existence to begin with. Oh, but I will be a better person, not to mention homeless, penniless, deeply isolated, and broken beyond any return. Nothing like a faceless unrelenting pressure to batter you and break your heart daily without explaining anything. Can’t wait to be a better person.
As a person born on Nov 22, this past year has been quite transformative, and ultimately beneficial. Nothing easy is worth doing — it is the difficulties in life that make us who we are. I have gained a much clearer notion of who I am, and what my purpose is. I am finally coming into my own power, and am learning how to control and use it. It is a massive, transformative force for everyone, which has been confusing in the past, and difficult to deal with, because I am just a small woman. I am looking forward to seeing what wisdoms Saturn in Saggitarius shall bring, and looking forward to experiencing Saturn’s last trip through Scorpio in my lifetime. I have a funny feeling it will be immensely interesting for all.
So accurate: power plays, energy drains, evil, death. I’m hoping w/the station direct in Aug., it’ll be done, done, done for us late fixed Suns.
The worst past of Saturn in Scorpio is that these are the boundaries and issues that you can’t really see, or are not openly talked about, and with the tension Pluto/Uranus add to the mix these issues are apparent but not necessarily definable or quantifiable, yet. Things are just bubbling like hot lava beneath us ready to blow, and we want to take charge and fulfill our debts and karma but its hard when one can’t identify what is ours and what is someone else’s buried secret! Have we really been out of line or just too close to something that others want to keep hidden, it is a personality disorder or is it people overstepping boundaries? Is it all in your head those aches and pains or is you community water poisoned? Is it your imagination or is your pharmicist assistant giving you less meds in each bottle? Did that person really do those things or are they a scapegoat? Until this square brings us the final eruption its hard to know which direction to turn and who the real victims are as opposed to the perpetrators! It’s hard to fight/overcome what you can’t see. So at least having some information will hopefully help this time around.
We’ll also enjoy the mutual reception between Pluto in Cap and Saturn in Sadge. We weren’t seeing beheadings until Saturn went into Sagittarius.
thank you so much for reminding me about the mutual reception! that does make things a little more cozy and gives a lot of hope that wasn’t there this morning. Hopefully we have learned from saturn in sag t to define boundaries and be efficient with force and power to avoid this again, we have “some” clue who the enemies are.
I equate Saturn in Scorpio with the concept of the building of a skyscraper.You would not want to build that on sand. Saturn here is that element that will give the stability to sequentially build up from here to eventually kiss that sky. This is the foundation. The success or failure depends upon the work done here. It is here that we must remove the sand and create something solid on which to build. Saturn in all the sequential signs depend on the work done here. I have done extreme excavation here, gone into the dark earth to remove what was hidden but unstable. I may have to do it some more as it returns, I do not know but I better get it right or I will not stand. It has been a difficult job for me since this for me has been falling on the 1st and 7th. Building foundations is slow work. A lot of progress is not seen with the naked eye but it is still there and I know because I have been laboring ther for such a long time. Best wishes to all in your building so that you may reach the sky. You will need to go deep to climb out of the ground.
beautiful!
After all that crap, I have absolutely zero need to build a skyscraper. After all that (Saturn in Scorpio transiting my natal moon) crap, I can’t imagine why anyone would want to build a skyscraper. Saturn showed me, quite frankly, that all human endeavor is idiotic and meaningless. Yeah, that’s what we need, another genius who thinks the world needs another skyscraper. You are using metaphor, fantastic, I get it. But your goofy greeting card slant illustrates exactly what Saturn deters: unwitting human action resulting in karma. It trims the fat. Why are you here specifically? Because the endgame is knowing enough NOT to reincarnate.
Thanks for the reminder about Saturn’s whereabouts. I, a Scorpio, appreciate the second chances. Struggling with power and the depths of my own “twisted ankle” (a mythic reference in my culture) your reminder gives me insight. The timing is helpful, too: Summer through mid-Sept. As Kaizerina wrote earlier, this will be the last time Saturn transits Scorpio in my lifetime (where my sun, chiron, and mercury reside natally) and focusing my energy where it can do the most is a plus.
P.S. Elsa, thanks for getting this out for us on the blog. In between all you’re up to with the house/moving/juggling finances/health … this is a big reminder to serve us all!
You’re welcome! 🙂
I’m looking forward to this time period as much as I’m looking forward to having no money all the time and being stretched thin to where I want to pull all my hair out. I’m terrified.
Well, since things are still rather crappy (nothing has changed, nothing clicks) the whole Saturn retrograde seems redundant. If Saturn wants to oppose my Moon again, then oppose it, as Saturn has become a stale act.
I am sick to death of Saturn in Scorpio and absolutely dreading this. Back to the swamp one more time. It will conjunct my Venus and square my Pluto again.
The last time it touched that configuration a year ago, two of my very good friends passed away. I’ve been thinking a lot about them lately and how much I miss them. Beautiful memories, but so painful.
This is the 2nd Saturn in Scorpio transit in my life. Both involved the death of people I loved, lack of money and power struggles of all kinds. That’s how it came out in my chart anyway. It was in my 2nd house.
I second that…..sick to death indeed!
Me too, but have felt a lifting of pressure and struggle internally in the last few days and weeks, and power struggles are resolving, as if my mind has been making its decisions and coming to terms without conscious effort. I am scared too but also accepting of what may come, I am not scared any more. Maybe that’s the true gift of Saturn in Scorpio – facing the really bad stuff and ploughing on through.
I am not happy about Saturn returning to Scorpio. This means it will retrograde over my ascendent and cross it a second time. in the past 7 years, I have experenced my second Saturn return, Saturn in my sun sign Libra. Satiurn in 12th house Scorpio and now this. And I haven’t gotten to Saturn transiting my 2nd house a few years from now. Enough!
Hey, I’m just glad it’s not bouncing back to Libra. That one killed me. I say bring it… force out yet another shadow of mine.. whatthehell.
Anything that can make a clean slate is good, even if it hurts!
(Speaking for myself, however. I do not wish sufferance on others!)
He Pepe and Jo France….me too. I just got a little wiggle room. This makes me want to cry. What degrees will this impact?
25-29 primarily.
Thanks Elsa.
Please tell me we will have some positive aspects while this is going on.
Well, it turns retrograde on my birthday. What could this possibly mean? It seems like the Heavens have been targeting me personally for the past few years for some kind of total disillusionment with regards to love. I saw it all coming years ago, but of course, I did not want to face it. It forced me to look at my illusions anyway. Saturn hates me, that Devil… This has been a bastard of a G-D saturn transit + Pluto/Uranus transit. I hate to say it but I hope I put my love illusions to rest and finally live in peace with true acceptance of the cards I’ve been dealt in life. I want to feel peace. If I have to be destroyed to find peace so be it.
I went through multiple symbolic deaths and an actual near-death experience when it was in Scorpio. It was beyond anything I’ve ever lived through. I was lucky to come out alive from the ashes. Saturn in Sagittarius WAS SO BEAUTIFUL TO FEEL after all that pain and chaos. I felt optimistic and hopeful for the future for the first time in a long time. Now Saturn is going to retrograde back into the pits of hell….again??? Saturn is going to force me to take an exam after all that? That’s like going to the hospital and forcing someone in a body cast to take the Board Certification exam to become a doctor. I hate Saturn/Pluto in mutual reception. I cannot take another fracture or lose another tooth. Can’t my restructuring and rebuilding on an entirely new foundation be good enough? Will Saturn reward me this time around for returning to the right path? or continue to beat me up for something I’m still failing to learn? …*hyperventilates*
I get my gold tooth on the 14th
: D
I am looking forward to this, I actually wish it lasted longer but that still is a decent chunk of time. Saturn will be trining my Cancer sun again so that’s pretty cool! Last time I took some vacation days from work and just straight up gave myself permission to sit around and heal.
I am looking forward to it. So much has been unearthed for me to heal. I am so much more clearer on my priorities having had to go through hell to get it. It will oppose my Jupiter. I am ready to close this chapter once and for all and start over in my life, on my terms.
My venus is in scorpio 25 degree in seventh house and my staurn in seventh house in sagitaurus 15degree..
this transit will hit me directly !! Am scared
Anyone can tell how will that affect me ??
And btw I am a capricorn so my ruler is saturn :/
TSaturn in 4th house of scorpio squared my sun, hit my IC, moon and neptune ….since 2012 i’ve had my son marry, my father pass away, my house flooded/remodeled, my kids move back in and have my first grandbaby, then right as saturn was entering sag the kids bought house and moved out!! So with it coming back….it won’t hit the planets (early degrees) but will it effect the good things at the end of its transit?? I was happy with the baby and their new house etc….I considered all of that time as my ‘gift’ from the saturn transit to my 4th.
I feel for you. In 2012, my father passed away, I moved from a home where I had lived for 15 years, my only daughter went away to college, I had to distance from family that I will always love but who are very toxic for me, all as I worked to establish an independent practice in Clinical Psychology. I am not reeling as much, but yes, it has been so challenging! Being a Scorpio– nobody said it was light or easy, but at least it is quite the interesting ride. Right?!
I am okay, but sooo exhausted, sooo tired.
Last year was soo hard, and I am still feeling the reverberations of it, although I do feel more grounded as a result of all the work that was done. I am limited in my knowledge of Astrology, but how long will this Saturn in Scorpio transit take? When will it start, and when will it finish? I look forward to hopefully the later years of my life being more peaceful than the first two-thirds. I am willing to learn lessons, yet it has been quite the ride. More peace, integration, warm comfortable connections, love. I sure could use it. If anyone could help, I am 11-21-64, born in Havana, Cuba time 7:20 pm.
Natalie, sounds as if you and I have a lot in common. I, like you, am very limited in my knowledge of astrology, we both are Scorpios, when I told my psyc doc about life up until now, she said I could make a great horror story out of it. I was born 10/31/63 at 4:46pm in Statesville NC. I too would love a normal, peaceful life for the last 3rd of mine. Scorpio shows up 5 times in my chart. So are we damned to live out the rest of our life this way? Suicide would be the easy way out for me, but I can’t bring myself to that deed for the love of my wife and daughter. What did we do or not do to deserve this? Blessings to you, Bill
Saturn running back over Venus, heading dangerously close to my AC and then going forward and running over my Venus again. Opposing my Chiron all the way.
Sticky sticky love troubles. But really figuring out what the real thing is. I hope I don’t become too much of a curmudgeon- but I just have no time for superfluous superficial fragile relationships and friendships. And don’t get me started on money…
I feel like this is my last hurrah. It’s all so amazing how these energies impact lives. My 2nd hse Sun, Mercury, Jupiter, Venus, and Neptune got the lesson of a lifetime. Painful but I feel like I was reborn and rising from the fire. This last trip back into Scorpio will hit my Neptune at 29 degrees. I’m trying to accomplish what seems like the impossible and I need this time to finally turn those dreams into reality.
I hope everyone fairs well. xoxo
I hit a wall in my relationship yesterday, and was able to finally learn a huge lesson. the lesson being that if I don’t take time for myself, to get centered and nurture myself, then I make others around me miserable.
It’s been opposing my Sun for like 3 years -__-
My self-esteem has been a 2 steps forward 5 steps back on repeat.
I’ve slowed down significantly socializing wise, since I don’t make good company when I feel like shit, you know?
Saturn will be crossing over my NN again, which makes me a hermit/recluse.
I am just hoping it doesn’t delay my employment I have been awaiting for since 2012 even further…..
LAgurl1997, did Saturn make you physically and mentally ill like myself? Family issues, money issues, depression, worked over 30 years in a row, july 2012 last day for me. I was born 10/31/63 at 4:46pm in Statesville. Scorpio is in my chart 5 times. Good luck to you, and when will it be over, if ever?
My Mars is in Scorpio and my Saturn is in Scorpio on my natal chart. Does this mean this will affect me positively or not?
And Pluto is in Scorpio in my chart also.
Alexandra
Thank you Elsa. Mars is 28 degrees Scorpio. Saturn 15 degrees. Pluto 1 degrees Scorpio.
Maybe the divorce (following 8 months of complete separation from emotionally/financially/physically abusive pisces) I’m starting on April 1 is one of the things to end. Have been nervous about starting the process and excited to have it be done once and for all. Also hoping for a promotion at work – if I don’t get it may look for different position at another company. Otherwise I am good but a bit recluse since dating is hard with a 1 year old baby.
My daughter’s North Node is in Scorpio. I’m excited about this push toward her life goals. Saturn is the planet of karma & I feel a lot of past life fears will be overcome during the next 6 months. Saturn is the Father Figure of the Zodiac, the disciplinarian who wags his finger & says “Grow up! Face reality!” As my daughter interviews at colleges now, Saturn will be done with this transit just as she goes to a new school. It’s exciting. Saturn gets a bad rap, and it brings trials & tests for sure, but it cements things, brings your work to fruition. I’ll take some structure over chaos.
I am not enjoying this at all. I wish this was over with. During this retrograde Saturn is dabbling between my 12th house and ASC and going over my Moon and Sun multiple times. I appreciate the lessons I’ve learned while Saturn was in my 12th but it was a hard time in my life I do not wish to revisit. I feel like my life has come to a complete halt right now. I know this is part of my transformation but it’s frustrating at times to not know where you are going. Plus Im not up for more obstacles being put in front if me preventing me from accomplish my goals. Saturn going over my Moon and Sun is not fun either. I couldn’t sleep for a week because of anxiety when Saturn ascended to my Moon.
Oh boy, am i ready for one last dive!
In April of 2013, shortly after Saturn entered Scorpio, my mother was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. Scorpio rules my 4th house. In October of that year, she stopped speaking to me and instructed my entire family, to not tell me anything about her illness. (Saturn begun squaring my moon and Uranus was opposing my natal Pluto, not sure how these relate, i just trust that they do.) We began speaking again in August 2014 (Transiting Mars conjunct my Scorpio Uranus, changes manifest). I got to see her in early January 2015, shortly after Saturn entered Sag. She passed away in mid-February and i recently attended her memorial at the end of March. Needless to say, a wild couple of years. I spent much of the time anxious, frustrated, sad, angry…all of it. At the same time, anchored in the understanding that if she had to be angry with anyone in our small family, than i was the best person for it because a) it makes sense if you knew our history and b) I was best equipped to deal with it since not taking things personally is a beneficial side effect of all my training in mindfulness and healing.
What I am excited about is heading back into that Scorpio time to pull out any last gems my soul needs to glean from Saturn in Scorpio so that i can move on and move forward and close that chapter of lessons in my life. My mother has been one of my most challenging teachers, of course and I believe I would be doing her and our relationship a disservice if i didn’t commit to learning whatever i can about our dynamics, our contract, to bring it to light for healing.
Wow, love this. Helps me see Saturn going back into Scorpio in a new light, instead of being scared. Appreciate it, Maureen.
when will we find peace? at one moment life feels so beautiful and the other moment, i am standing at the edge of my balcony and thinking so deeply about just giving up and jumping down. I did take some silly medicine to kill myself, which only got me sick, no luck in there either. During this struggle or period of Saturn, are we meant to make wrong decisions? especially with love? or we took right decisions, but just don’t know how to deal with anything at all? Never felt so helpless in my life ever.. will Scorpio ever find peace? will over mind ever settle down ATLEAST for one complete year?????
Elsa thank you for this blog it has been really helpful. The past few years have been crazy psychological for me. I have my saturn in scorpio 22 degrees 1 house pluto in scorpio 2 degrees 12 house and my ascendent 25 degrees 1 house. What will this summer bring? I’ve learned so much but there is still a fear lurking.
((((mags))))
Please don’t do it, don’t even try it again in any fashion. Be grateful you did not do yourself any permanent harm (liver, kidneys, brain damage!). And don’t jump — you could end up a vegetable, imprisoned in a paralyzed body. When my husband dropped dead suddenly years ago, I thought about throwing myself in front of a bus, but I didn’t. Because I didn’t want to end up either trapped in a paralyzed body, or trapped in that current misery for eternity, which is what some people believe happens after suicide. Do not give up on life. No matter how deep your despair today, someday soon you will find joy in life again and be so glad to be alive. Today, go outdoors, look at the beauty of nature, flowers blooming, grass growing, birds singing, people smiling. You will feel better with fresh perspective. There is so much good out there — nature, books, animals, music. Grab some and rekindle your love of life today! I wish you every blessing!
Aloha to all,
It seems you all, like myself, are gearing up for the final round of the task maker’s last stop to Scorpio. My oh my, what a couple of years that transit was, but it truly delivered lessons and truths that needed to be accounted and confronted in our lives. If it were too easy, it would never get done. Saturn always will deliver, but espcially in Scorp, it took it to a whole other level.
I do truly feel this last pit stop will be a completion and culmination of everything that 2 and a hald year transit was all about. Any debris, leftovers, and stones unturned will be getting examined and taken up for review. Saturn’s all about the final test, right? Well here it us, fellow astro lovers. I say instead of trembling in fear and cowering away like it was oh so easy to do when this transit was first in effect, let’s give it all we got this time around and complete this cycle with graditude and the knowing that we weren’t defeated, thus coming out an entirely transformed being.
There’s no doubt about it that where Scorpio is concerned, we’re taking a look and plunder through the siftings that most people don’t want to look at. The more resistance to it, the harder it’ll be. I don’t see the retrograde as bringing up a whole lot of new baggage that wasn’t already viewed and sorted through in the 2 year’s if it’s orignial transit, but rather getting a grasp of it now that we’ve seen the ‘bigger picture,’ we were given with the brief forward motion as Saturn went through the first 4 degrees of Sag the first half of 2015.
I do feel what we did get of Saturn in Sag was just merely a glimpse or preview have you of the full on movie we’ll ne immersed in once we finally bid Saturn in Scorpio farewell this last time, at least till 30 years from now that is.
I have a 28 degree Scorpio ascendant, so as Saturn retros back, it’ll hit that for me a second time; the first being back in December ’14. Then it’ll hit it a third go around when it stations direct. Needless to say, I’m in for some shake ups. Saturn crossing the ascendant point is no joke, but also quite empowering. It as well is forming an exact conjunction to my 0 degree Sag moon. Whoooo. This guy right here has learned to make friends with Saturn, as struggling with him became to much of a lifeless, cold, and miserable exsistence. When we come to realise that Saturn is actually on our side (yes, I totally just went there, lol,) then we can gain some much from the sacred time/task maker up their in the sky.
May the force be with you all as we dive back in~
Welcome. 🙂
Here here!
As a Pluto in Scorpio dude, Saturn through Scorpio wasn’t that troublesome like Saturn in Sadge has been on these months, so I can’t wait for a bit of Saturn Scorpio again.. Lol, our generation already knows about the “dark side” that play beneath the surface, so Saturn through Scorpio wasn’t even felt with us, what we are noticing is how insane and crazy the world can become, under this Sagittarius Saturn early transit, something the sagg pluto generation really understands I’ve seen , these guys are turning really wild these days, as well as the whole world ofc, but these guys just swim on it, its kinda scary for my generation who is dark indeed and deep but rarely into the action part, the things we think of, the stuff the saggs are daring to do ,I say scary because we can see how blunt society can become, things that I never thought people would dare to, are happening today with sagg Saturn, BTW it’s my first Saturn return so it’s been double difficult, lol, thanks for reading
Yes. This blog is pure gold. It’s about energy management.
And yes, there is evil in the world. If you ignore it, don’t do something about it, you become an accomplice to that evil. The thing is, when to be invisible and not get caught in the crossfire. Saturn is about timing, depth, intention, and wisdom. With Scorpio, there’s always mystery.
This wrap-up foray into Scorpio is almost comical because it is so obvious. I find myself in a mini version of the same thing I went through during the main Saturn/Scorpio visit. My particular lesson seems to be about self-value versus approval/acceptance from others. In other words – where does my happiness and strength come from? Hope I’ve picked up some smarts along the way…
I have early Scorpio Saturn and MC, this end game is at the end of my 10th house, squaring my natal Part of Fortune, and conjunct my progressed Moon.
During my first whirl with Saturn in Scorpio 30 years ago, I took a job with a boss who would later change my life greatly, got married after nearly breaking up, we bought our first house, bought and sold a small business (my idea, for “togetherness” — mistake!), and I gathered up my courage and discipline to begin the first of five years in real estate.
This go-round, I ended two draining friendships, bought a money-pit house (mistake), moved back to East Coast again (mistake), wasted a year in confused unemployed inertia, and now am selling the house after much indecision and loss to move back to CA, with potential work and something resembling a life again I hope and pray.
What have I learned? To avoid exasperating people. To survive and possibly even forgive my overthinking and unrealistic expectations of myself. That even when I think I’ve got all the facts, I probably haven’t. That a simple life is preferable to an overwhelmingly burdensome lifelong project for potential “financial freedom and security.” That I need real work, a job, structure, and physical work with people to thrive. To choose happy pursuits over sinking into sentimental swamps. To not bite off more than I can possibly digest. To not “fix what ain’t broke.” And that I squander way too much of my life on the internet!
I loathe Saturn going backwards in any case, but the return to Scorpio is the icing on the cake. I am using the transit to try to forge a different career. The “work” thing has always been bad throughout my life and I have just about had it. Oh, and I’ve started smoking. And got rid of just about all my friends and unnecessary suitors, so I can focus fully on the “work” thing. I don’t need their sarcasm or schadenfreude – unlike Aries me, they never tried anything different, and now are too old to do so – they don’t have it in them, they don’t have the drive I had. Yet I got knocked for trying different things, big time. I just don’t get it. Ah well. Jealousy, maybe? No one can understand why I never made it. I say it was all down to jealousy – people see my energy sitting opposite them and just can’t cope.
I created the best stuff with Saturn in Scorpio that I ever would. It was the most fertile time of my life, from 38-40. I wanted to be a second Beethoven, and in my mind, I succeeded. But I don’t look like Taylor Swift – not that I care, these people are exploited too – but there you go.
I also had an affair with a Christian (big mistake), got arrested, nearly committed suicide, and my dad and I broke contact with my mum for good – thank God!
I used to be able to sell sand to the Arabs, but during the Scorpio transits I haven’t been able to sell anything, to anybody. I hate sales and will do absolutely anything to stop this career of mine, which seems to be stuck in sales. I have no money, but just Don’t Want To Do It.
I can feel Saturn in my bones, literally almost going direct. It’s like waiting for an egg to drop, nerve wracking yet exciting at the same time.