One of the regulars here, sent me her thoughts. Edited, slightly for clarity and brevity…
“I was thinking about the Saturn Pluto conjunction. It lands in my 8th. Been working on my own pathology best I can. Trying to escape, fix, mend, move beyond and transcend so I can focus on other stuff around me.
I woke up in the middle of the night with this thought.
My pathology is that I HAVE a pathology.
In our modern times it is almost as if you do not belong if you aren’t broken, have a drinking problem, depression, anxiety, aren’t “woke”, aren’t “compassionate” enough etc. etc. It is almost as if we have been reading books since our childhood about how broken we are and so we look for how to “fix” ourselves constantly. How do we fix the extreme exhaustion. There is so much out there that is self-help, changing the self, mastering the self, etc. etc.
What if, just maybe, we aren’t broken but that the world we live in is so draining in stimulation (driving, tv, radio, this screen, that screen) and so demanding in our obligations to work, community, volunteer, etc. etc. that we aren’t actually pathological but just trying to cope in a very demanding, attention-wise, world.
Just maybe I’m not a bad person who is going to screw everything up constantly but just that too much is expected of me because I’m the one who shows up for the meetings and maybe I should stop showing up to help when I don’t have time or energy to help. Or show up less. Or?
It is a nubbin of a thought and not fully fleshed but the middle of night “your pathology is that you think you have a pathology” made me laugh but also made me stop and think…”
She thought the people who read here might be able to add to this. It seems like a Rorshach inkblot to me.
I read this as a person (a people) who’s been robbed of her peace (on earth). This makes her a victim which may or may not be true, but if it is true?
If it is true, I would look to turn 180 degrees and go after what’s lacking here. A sense of peace.