I recently came upon the idea that a person’s rigidity is a mask for the wound of injustice. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since. I have been encountering a lot of rigidity in my life, some from other people, but much of it in myself. And as I ponder this idea, I am finding more and more truth in it.
Rigidity, of course, would be Saturn energy. And this makes perfect sense. Saturn is exalted in Libra, which rules justice and fairness. Saturn’s affinity for authority, consequence, and comeuppance works best in a system in which everything is fair and justice is a given. But what happens when this isn’t the case?
When we receive the wound of injustice, it cuts so deeply. More than a personal slight or betrayal, injustice causes us to not only have to confront the fallout of our pain, but the horrible prospect that the very world as we know it is upside down. We have the pain of the initial wound, but also the pain of realizing that our wound just doesn’t matter. That the system was not designed for us. That the structures we believed were holding us together are actually tearing us apart. We have to tend to our pain while also remaking our worldview from the inside out.
That is the kind of wound that gapes and gapes until it threatens to swallow us whole. So it only makes sense that we become rigid. When Saturn can’t express itself as reasonable, logical consequence, it must instead express itself as a fortress that protects our vulnerability from the cruelty of the world. Think about the way Saturn looks, with its layers upon layers of protective rings surrounding a soft, vulnerable core. That is what we all look like when we confront injustice.
Where Saturn is in your chart provides good clues for where you are most prone to having this happen. Having Saturn in the 8th, my rigidity comes in the form of hardline stances about power imbalance and uneven energy exchange. If someone in a position of power is taking advantage of another person, particularly in intimate ways, it is very, very difficult for me to look at it on a case by case basis. I have to put real effort into not simply painting with a broad brush and refusing to consider any shades of gray. This is because of my own experience with unfairness and injustice in this arena.
The only way I’ve been able to get a handle on it is by allowing the wound to get air and daylight. We build these walls and become rigid in order to protect ourselves, but also to keep the wound from coloring our perspective forever. We get tired of living in that pain and want to close the book on it. But by building walls, we are giving it more power. We are giving our pain further opportunities to hurt us by driving a wedge into our hearts and closing us off from other people. We are continuing to exist in a way that is defined by the injustice we’ve experienced.
As much as we feel we need protection, we also need freedom. Walled in our rigid fortress, we make ourselves prisoners to our pain. It is only when we let ourselves be free again that we are truly able to experience the healing we seek. To be wounded and keep on living, to be cut down at the knees and still manage to live a great, beautiful, empowered life? That sounds like justice to me.
Have you been wounded by injustice? Where is your Saturn?