Reuniting With Your Lover, Friend Or Family Member…

With Uranus in the 7th house, I have a lot of experience with togetherness followed by separateness followed by togetherness and my strong experience is that whatever was there initially will be there when the people reunite and this is for good or ill. You may be able to better manage strong feelings that are conjured up when you reunite with someone but the energy itself will still be there.

For example I feel the same way about the soldier as I did when I was a kid and I feel the same with him too, as far as physically when he is in the room. We fought like a cat and a dog within hours of meeting each other, both yelling at the top of our lungs and we still have bouts like this.

As another example, my sister cropped up after a number of years and we fell right into sync and into the same feelings and patterns and ways of communicating that existed when we shared a bedroom, 40 years ago.

If you had a troubled relationship with someone it is probably delusional to think you can reunite and not have the same misgivings but there is an important point to make. It matters whether the problem was “yours” or “ours” and I will use myself as an example.

When I was young, I used to throw men out. I literally would kick them out of the house whenever things got tense, sort of like throwing the baby out with the bathwater you hear about. I outgrew this in my early 20’s. Not to say I do not still have the impulse because I do. But I have learned not to act on it, how damaging it is, what it can cost you, etc.

That is an example of something that has nothing to do with the other person. To contrast, say you were with someone who tended to insult you or oppress you in some way. Maybe they blame you for their unhappiness and the like… in between the good times. Things like this are liable to be hard-wired and odds are overwhelming if your reunite, you will repeat the experience. Not that this should stop you!

I reunited with Scott at least 20 times over the course of 35 years, both of us knowing what the likely result would be or perhaps because we knew what the result would be! We’re both commitment-phobics who knew very well we could go in knowing we wouldn’t be in for long!

Ben and I have been friends for 25 + years and whenever the phone rings, the same feelings constellate and I think this stuff is good to know. With Saturn heading into Libra, it’s a good idea to learn everything you can about relating to others, particularly when it comes to limits and/or definitions for good or ill.

If a person makes you feel safe, you feel safe. If they bore you, the bore you. If they make you nervous, they make you nervous. If they dump you on your head, they dump you on your head. If they covet you, they covet you and so on and on and on… as far as my experience goes.

What does your experience show?

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Comments

Reuniting With Your Lover, Friend Or Family Member… — 11 Comments

  1. Experience has showed me:

    trying to change other people, inflicting your ideas on other people of what you “think they should be” is highly damaging to the so-called ‘flawed’ person you are trying to change

    I really believe in being the change you want to see in people…

    It’s easy to alienate people with careless yammering about who you think they are and what you think they’re like

    there will always be more vulnerable members of society that need care

    Also, if a relationship is ruined by waiting, then it likely was destined not to last…I think true connections transcend time and space and physicality and love lives in the spirit, not on the Earth plane…

    Last but not least, if someone wants to leave a relationship with me, they are FREE TO GO. I will mourn my loss but I will never ry and stop someone from leaving me…I learned this almost 10 years ago but it has become crystalline lately

  2. I have 7th house Uranus too, so I have the same understanding of the together/separate/together/separate/etc.
    Experience (thus far) has taught me not to run (literally run away) from my problems in relationships, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still ignore them unfortunately…

    I’m actually looking forward to my Saturn return in Libra. Should be interesting.

  3. “I really believe in being the change you want to see in people…” – Kashmiri

    I agree 110% Usually what we want to change about someone else is a projection. Becoming that change or taking on the process of that evolution yourself is supremely more satisfying and good for everyone involved.

  4. My feelings change like the weather. Natal Moon 7th house, squares Venus and Saturn.
    To be honest I am capricious in my relationships/interactions.
    This all creates the expected outcomes.

  5. I just figure everyone goes away and to accept that similar people come back. I have not had anyone disappear from my life to come back into it. If they’ve disappeared they’ve disappeared. However, I do see similar people, just different names. At first I thought this was weird, now I just think it’s the way things are.

  6. So far whenever anyone’s left (and there have been a lot) they have never came back and that hasn’t bothered me before. Now it does, because I lost the most important relationship in my life fairly recently and now I have no hope of talking to this person ever again.

    Okay, I’m lying. I have every faith that I will at some point talk to this person again, but I know it will resolve nothing and that makes me inexpressibly sad. I’ve had to resolve myself to the fact that whatever I thought it was, whatever it was to me, was a complete and total falsehood and entirely meaningless. I honestly don’t know when/if I’ll stop greiving.

  7. I’m super aware of what remaining tendencies to outgrow… I take full responsibility for that (once I’m done whining and what not.) It’s Mine. When the other person does the same, there’s no repeat performance but something different. But it seems to be more rare then common. And I’ll add, some composites will make it crystal clear which way it can go – or not in a glance.

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