Refranation and Missed Connections

missed connectionOver the next few months, Venus and Mars are involved in an intricate dance. Ever since Venus entered Gemini in April, she has been chasing a trine with Mars in Aquarius. She has followed him through the degrees, gaining ground all the while. However, before she can make her exact trine, Mars enters Pisces, where he has no interest in Gemini. In fact, Pisces has a hostile, tense connection with Gemini.

But still Venus keeps up the chase. She turns retrograde this month and swings back through the degrees of Gemini, and finally, finally she makes her connection in early June. The only problem is that now it’s a square. Not exactly the dream love she hoped for.

This process of missed connections in astrology is called refranation. You can liken this to someone who has an obsessive crush. They chase and chase and chase and when they can’t obtain the object of their affection, they begin to build resentment. But that doesn’t mean they give up! They would still rather have their person, even if they kind of hate them, than accept their sunk costs and give up entirely.

So if in the next month or so there’s something you’re seeking that you just can’t grasp, or are living with an itch you can’t scratch, look to where Venus and Mars are transiting your chart. And rest assured that you will eventually get your hands on what you are seeking. The question is whether you’ll want it when you get it.

Are you chasing something? Tell us about it!

Consult with Midara.

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Refranation and Missed Connections — 17 Comments

  1. Interesting. Crushes were so popular with us throughout our teens and 20s.. we never saw it as a sort of destructive engulfing act until someone else framed it that way. I’m chasing stuff too. I feel the pain of the connections and hope I built as my Venus Pluto transit continues eroding. I feel the pain of old doubts. I feel too old and stupid for what I want and so many have told me to drop that attitude.

  2. It’s interesting you chose showpaper. It was from a disappointing hipster past and I wonder if its still in circulation. It was something I placed hope on, a zine, in a world where millennials were failing to connect and I was not able to find a sense of belonging. Venus Pluto transit pointed out that I deserve one. And it’s supposed to not be too late.

    • Kri, thanks for i.d.ing the zine. I don’t know it, but LOVE zines. Another interesting near-connect. The Zine Scene has been one I’ve sought but not latched to exactly…but indirectly? That’s another story:)

      • This particular thing is more of a paper that shows all the current concerts but has art on the front.

        I’m amazed that gen z is getting back into zines beautifully. I saw a Twitter thing that some gen z kids started a zine during quarantine.

        Your creativity is always inspiring 🙂

  3. Fascinating this ‘refranation’!! Venus moves ever closer to my Natal Uranus (6th House) which sextiles my Natal Mars-Saturn conjunction in the 8th House. But before an exact connection to Uranus Venus goes away (retrogrades). Mars transits my 2nd House to light up what I value now. The Pluto-Saturn-Jupiter transiting process? They move back and forth through my the mid-degrees of my 1st House. Who AM I NOW?
    The zodiac and my transits through it now are giving me such an incredible opportunity to be that trapeze-dancer. Incapable in my current physical body, the sky with the stars and planets set me up on that flying swing … chasing youth? chasing the dark-haired woman who I once was with values unripe yet? Before Venus has chance to grab my Natal Uranus lightning rod attracted to a tempered Mars(thanks to Saturn) she backs away. Clever the sky.
    Wow.Love it!

    • ‘chasing youth? chasing the dark-haired woman who I once was with values unripe yet?’

      Interesting that you say that. I thought being young meant not having your values in place.

      I’m meeting a lot of people 23 and under with their values already in place. It makes me so ashamed of my wandering years.. all those articles say that you spend your 20s wandering and learning about your self worth.. and these young people know what theyre about immediately.. I went through my Saturn return in Sag and said that I would be done with regret and live the adventurous life I want now. And stop being scared and playing small. It makes me look and act like what a 20 year old is. How did I waste all that te and continue to? Also, I was never super pretty at that age. The women in my family gain their feminine points over time I guess. I want to live the way I want now. But the guilt and doubt that comes with it.. yeah also I’ll have a Venus Uranus transit soon too. The old questions are throwing me for a loop.

  4. That’s an interesting way to read this whole thing .. but is this venus really so sure about what she wants? I can’t say for sure as gemini is so ambivalent about their desires . . add to that the retrograding/changing minds and the fact that poor mars is deeply desirous of venus in pisces, he simply adores her . . it looks like this whole dance is more about steady then weak in the knees mars progress meeting with crazy swirling sweet girl venus 🙂
    I know not exactly sticking to the script (or question) here but I was tickled . .

    • had progressed mars in pisces for many years, a familiar energy. venus in gemini is doin a transit over my moon. this one is sure she will get what she desires.

  5. I cannot wait.

    My current ex and I made a connection that we didn’t foresee coming. She reneged due to her own internal transformation, me having a kid (she has a Aries Moon), and my own internal transformations too.

    We have decided to still be friends and see each other. I want to rekindle that which we “fell” in.

  6. Chase too strong for my objects of obsession,I swim close and languor with fantasy of the goods and they greys

  7. I’m not bothering to chase. I still want the fellow, but if he’s just going to drop out of communication during the plague, what can I do? I don’t want to be obnoxious about it. If I’m not wanted, I need to go away, right?

    I don’t necessarily think he stopped liking me, but if he has nothing to say or doesn’t want to talk or is too depressed to, there doesn’t feel like shit I can do. Can’t see him in person ever again so what is the point anyway. Might as well get over it because at the rate things are going we will probably never see each other again.

    • I agree that you shouldn’t chase. But maybe don’t completely fall off the grid either. Now more than ever it’s important to stay connected, even it’s an occasional text “just saying hello from the other side”

      The reason I say this, is that generally, I’ll say it again – I am generalizing that men are more action (Mars) orientated especially when they want (Venus) something. Social distancing has basically shut the door on the ability of most men to chase and take action (Mars). So it’s very likely that many men are just plain confused and may even feel debilitated by the inability to act. Mars is also linked to sex drive … as you can imagine, the “stay at home” decree might be a mood killer for many. So, it may not be about you that he isn’t “chasing” – your fella just might be feeling caged, no room to run, chase, he can’t take action (Mars) and as a result he may have simply lost his mojo. Also, he might not want you to see him this way … weak, because his Mars is caged.

      You’re Venus, so do what Venus does best. Be Love. Be happy. Be creative in your expression. But whatever you do, it has to be genuine, not needy and you’ve got to love unconditionally!! This is hard I know, because you might get hurt, but you also might get your fella and experience the magic of love (Venus-Neptune).

      So, stay connected but have no expectations. He may not respond initially or in a way you would like him to, but in time he may learn to express himself without Mars with your help. Sometimes a little kindness and love opens the hardest shells.

      Don’t give up on the possibility of love!

  8. Interesting, Venus is transiting my 11th and Mars my 7th. Wanting a friendship to be more than it is? I currently have no crushes but I do wish for a partner. Maybe someone I desire will turn out to be a friend? Thanks for the post.

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