I started writing about Pluto’s transit through my 12th house in 2007. Without a doubt, this series is the most detailed and intimate firsthand account of this transit, in the world. Here’s the first post – Astrology The Scares The Hell Out Of People. If you want to study this transit in depth, click the tag below. It’s been quite an odyssey.
The losses I’ve suffered during this transit have been incalculable. There are no edges in the 12th house. Control is an illusion. It’s possible to yearn (12th house) for death (Pluto) and just as easy to slip away. One day I’m alive. The next day, I’ve passed.
I’m thinking about this, because my doctor called me last week, with test results. He’s young. I could tell he was upset. I wanted to tell him there was no need to be upset. I knew the test would be bad. I was prepared.
My situation is grim. That does not mean I am going to die. I bet all y’all a dollar, I don’t die. But I will suffer.
You know how they rate medical things, mild, moderate or severe? I am “severe”. The word is used more than once in my report.
The doctor’s voice broke when he told me this. I assume it’s because he knows where I’m headed. But he doesn’t really know where I’m headed. He doesn’t know that my ability to tolerate and transcend pain (and hardship) is developed. How else could I get to “severe”, before I ever complained?
This next year is going to be very difficult. I don’t have the timing yet and whatever happens, I probably won’t be talking about it much. This is because it’s a Pluto transit through the 12th house! This stuff is hidden. It’s supposed to be hidden.
The hidden stuff is now revealed, just like when a submarine surfaces before diving back down. But a submarine does not stay on the surface for long.
I went to PT today, sat next to a gal who had the surgery I expect to have, about 2 years ago.
That’s the only word I can think of. I have no clue how I will get through this…because I don’t have help.
However, we’ll figure out something. And she was okay…she was 2 years, post op.
This poor gal…her mother-in-law (dementia) burned her house down, within 30 minutes…her husband had a stroke 10 minutes after they got home after a 5 hour drive. 11:30 pm on NYE. They wanted to make it home for the New Year, for a family tradition. It’s unbelievable what happens to people.
She was in there waiting for her husband who is doing rehab. He’s recovering pretty well, seeing as at first he could only move his eyes…like 6 hours at a time.
Oh…PT two times next week. I am hoping to hear of the results of the MRI at some point this week.
You do have help — your husband, your faith, and all of us praying for you.
Praying for that poor woman and her husband, too.
No, someone will need to be here. My husband is gone 11 hours a day.
Elsa, if it comes to that, I’ll come stay with you and be your personal assistant/housekeeper/dog carer, etc.!
That’s sweet. Thank you. Honestly, it’s thrown me for a loop…reality. And lupus complicating matters is almost unthinkable. Example, I think a person has to go off NSAIDs for surgery..and possibly Plaquenil as well. The thought makes me cringe.
MRI is back. It’s bad but it could be worse. I guess it *will* be worse, because this is progressive. But for today, I should continue PT and taking these pills…see if if can this dialed back to any degree between now and April, which is my next appointment. In April, we decide if it should be sent to a surgeon.
So it sounds to me, like I have a reprieve?
What I’m thinking now is to have my garden and deal with this in the fall? Assuming no changes, this is.
Well, it may be progressive @Elsa, but we live in progressive times! Reprieve? Yes! Time? Yes! Breather 😉 From where I sit, I see your Garden has been a huge priority for you… get it in the ground… enjoy it & fill your heart up!! Good Luck with medication progress, fingers & toes crossed for you, Pisces style =) x.
Born with Pluto in scorpio on 12th lol
Elsa, my heart goes out to you and you continue to be in my prayers. I hope this doesn’t come out wrong – I’ve read a lot about certain people taking on the pain of the collective, in a mystical sense. The way you transform your experiences, which are horrifying, is healing for a lot of people. I’m amazed and still in deep prayer for you that this burden will be lifted.