Parenting And A Legacy Of Success

I have an interest in some aspects of social psychology and have noticed to two themes emerge in the field that smack of Pluto’s transit through Capricorn. One is the current interest is the study of who achieves.

Talent Is Overrated: What Really Separates World-Class Performers from Everybody Else
touts the importance of hard work. Outliers: The Story of Success states it takes 10,000 hours of effort or practice to become excellent at something but also states the status begets status or in other words, who your parents are matter. Their status has bearing on your level of success as does the effort they invest in you.

Parenting and effort are Capricorn related and you are empowered (Pluto) or otherwise dependent on these things.

Were you empowered by your parents?

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Parenting And A Legacy Of Success — 14 Comments

  1. yes for: integrity, intelligence, individuality, a right to privacy.

    no to: untraditional thinking, inclusive social behaviour, abandonment of religion, having a career.

  2. social standing/education: yes
    being who i am: no
    (though soemtimes they tried. i think i was just too alien to them. somehow.)

    i rebelled. now i’m trying to get over the rebellion and just do what i should be doing. based on my criteria.

  3. Hmm. My creativity was very encouraged. They valued the arts.

    It’s hard to look back actually and try to figure it out.

    But “empowered” ? That word doesn’t fit. Maybe lead by example. But that goes for positive and negative.

    I frequently feel powerless. And…I think my mother did too.

  4. I don’t know if empowered would be my word choice. Challenged would be the better choice. They made me think and never let on that I could be less-than anything. But they also set the bar pretty darned high for themselves so…

  5. No, they had really shitty childhoods so they never learned. did not catch up with their grand children either. My sibling could not leave them alone in the same room together until they were teens.

    I benefited from a few adults key encounters which were influential and somewhat empowering. A little can go a loooong way!

  6. I realized many years ago that my mother had come as far as she could emotionally from where her mother was. She broke some cycles of abusive behavior and while she was far from perfect herself, she was worlds beyond her own raising. She enabled me to empower my daughter in ways that her mother couldn’t empower her.

    My father has always and still does defer to my mother.

  7. Yes – in odd, back-handed ways. Long story short, I was, in effect, the parent in a number of (but not all!) respects. But since I wasn’t actually the parent, it went unacknowledged (underground – very Plutonian I would have thought in its own way). Empowered by learning I had to do it on my own . . .

  8. Nope, sometimes penalised for failure, but nothing consistent.

    My mom heartily discouraged me from post secondary education because ‘I’d never make it’

  9. Wow hmm…

    I’m realizing that my life is more filled with Capricorn everyday.

    Moon in Capricorn. No Pluto transit…… just yet.

    They’ve empowered me in that I have food, clothing, shelter, good role models and a college education. I have the things I need to survive in this world. I know I am privileged and damn lucky… and I appreciate it. I appreciate them.

    But, let’s see… empowered? I’m not feeling empowered at the moment. It seems power = own money + age + wiles these days. And I simply don’t have any right now to my name. (24 years old). Everything is from my parents right now. And that guilt is killing me!

    All of that guilt, while I try to get my career decided and started … Well, it’s negating any power I have over my life. I can’t seem to make any decisions without considering them… or feeling horribly guilty and ashamed.

    They are strong strong people. Opinionated. Say what’s on their mind about what you should do with your life (especially me). But, that also means that they’re pretty good examples of responsible people. People who have stuck by their principles, who have learned the hard way.

    It’s just that it’s getting to be oppressive because they are so powerful. And I need to make a decision now about my life from my own research, or else, I am going to go crazy! I need to make my own mistakes and I need to tell them that…. Wow! That felt good to write. Heehee. Thanks!

  10. Cognitive dissonance.

    Mega yes to the value of hard work & perseverance (we started working as kids) but when I actually accomplished anything it was dismissed.

    Luckily when I was a young adult I figured out that no matter what I accomplished it would always be so, and to do it for myself not for others.

    My siblings have a joke about our work ethic & have named it haha. (We have Saturn in the 4th.)

  11. They really didn’t push or encourage or talk about college. But they would make attempts at supporting us if we drug them along. I went to college for a while. My brother got a lot of encouragement from friends and eventually made it as a phd in biology. My other brother went the life of living like a rockstar and partying like one. His live is about to give out. They didn’t care what we did really as long as we didn’t bug them.

  12. They tried to. I had a lot of pressure on me to achieve at school- I was the youngest of 4 and the others had all done very well.
    When I didn’t they thought it was just me being stubborn. Then I struggled at uni and they thought it was because they didn’t pay me enough attention as a teen. Finally I was diagnosed with ADD this year.
    It was not my fault, or theirs. I am just fucked in the head, haha!
    So I am a late bloomer, but I will eventually live up to their expectations- which is the basis of achievement.

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