I am feeling really funky lately and it’s a feeling that comes back
to me repeatedly. I get very paranoid about my relationship and tend to either lash out in anger or sink into depression. I try not to do either but it seems sometimes it can’t be helped and then I begin a cycle of beating myself up about these feelings I’m having which of course only serve to make things worse.
Is there something in my chart that could help explain what is going on with me? I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.
Paranoid, about your relationship huh? If you haven’t felt this before, then rejoice because you’re finding your true self.
If you have Pluto or Scorpio tied up in your relationship profile, and you do – then angst is part of the deal. Love is deep. Love will trigger you and if you try to escape this…well, good luck.
Lashing out is a waste of time. I suggest you turn thoughtfully, inward and go deep. Use your mind. Probe! Ask yourself where these feelings are coming from and be still long enough for answers to emerge.
It might help you to write. Longhand! Write it down. “What am I afraid of?” or the like. Then write the answer as it comes up. I want you to give your subconscious a chance to speak. It obviously wants to, and when you throw a fit, you’re thwarting this process.
Notice there’s no judgment in this. So no need to get depressed, huh? This is about being productive, and mining your experience for something of value.
It’s in there, I promise you that. It’s rich beyond your wildest imagination and better yet, it’s never-ending.