On Being Simultaneously Popular And Unpopular – I Think I Have This Nailed

queen of diamonds playing cardI like to solve problems so scan for solutions to mine all the time. Currently I feel blocked for a variety of reasons but more specific to the blog, I just can’t seem to come up with anything interesting to me that will not upset people, and become over-large or unmanageable, as I outlined here – Uncensored Writing.

The fact is my opinions are often unpopular and provocative and it takes a lot of energy just to get them onto the blog in some form. It is so challenging, it can take a lot of time and thought so once I have said got something up here (I am talking about things along the lines of the Government as Daddy for the Single Mother and the like) I will have work backed up. This means I have to post the thing and then turn and refocus on other work.

But what happens. if I am not expressly careful is I wind up having to explain or defend myself all day long and then someone gets pissed… and maybe you can see this from my perspective.

If it were my job to set charges and then watch fires burn then that would be one thing but I am personally not into that at all. I mistaken as being into that but what I am really into and really care about is communicating my ideas because I know they’re sharp. They are pointed and they can take you somewhere (Mars Mercury in the 9th) however all the sparring is a HORROR for me. I have Libra and I hate it as you can see quite vividly in this video where I came on to plead for decorum on my blog.

So this becomes the great challenge: How can I write something and not go down in flames?

I was thinking tonight, I have all these ideas – I have hundreds of ideas, most of them innovative but my ideas are not what people like, at least not the first time they hear them.  I like you guys and being Italian, I want to feed you.  But I feel right now, it’s as if all my ideas are “liver” and no one in the house likes liver. ::smiles::

mercury dimeI am hoping this train of thought leads me somewhere eventually. Right now I can get some liver up here now and then but jeez louise it’s difficult.

It’s a strange dichotomy to be simultaneously popular and unpopular. I get on a roll and I am happily clacking away, producing and then someone starts telling me how hideous I am and then someone(s) make a grand exit from the blog and this drama has repeated so many times, I don’t know what to make of it.

I know, I know. Just write what you want, Elsa, but guess what? It’s not your dime. It’s not the skin off your nose. Do you know how many people have stormed off this blog? MANY. Was it really in my best interest to piss them off? Is it ever in anyone’s best interest to piss someone off?

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On Being Simultaneously Popular And Unpopular – I Think I Have This Nailed — 44 Comments

  1. I remember eating liver. Back in the day it was a respectable meat.

    I was thinking about the Soldier and how you’d written a while ago some of his thoughts on becoming Soldier in the present climate.

  2. I don’t remember writing about that but he surely has an opinion on it.

    I am sure I could sit here and off the top of my head dash off 10 topics that would attract and repel. I could probably dash off 100 if you gave me an hour but this is not my job. My job is to read charts and if there is no one here because of my mouth, I will be unemployed.

  3. Being burned at the stake for ones talents is so 17th century. But maybe you could have two blogs. ElsaElsa and Elsa Unplugged, I am sure many would want to know your deepestand truest takes…..

  4. You make an impression, Elsa. You absolutely make an impression. I don’t share all of your opinions (and don’t even think it’s really *normal* to share all of anybody’s opinions) but I do find what you say and trying to figure out where you’re coming from fascinating. You are vivid.

    You are correct, too – and I have also written for a living, my entire adult life. There’s art on your terms, and then there’s art as your means of commerce. Finding that golden point where they meet? Kind of a holy grail quest though one I believe can be accomplished, because I’m coming very close to getting there myself.

  5. I guess you’re damn if you do…damn if you don’t…But I still would go with the truth…BE who you are and tell it like it is…people might be slow, but they eventually will catch on…I think we are all tired of the bullshit and the lies we are being fed everyday…the PC culture has done so much damage to people that they are afraid to be themselves…and it is sad…It takes a lot of courage to be yourself nowadays but we only have one life to live and I want to live mine standing up, being able to look at myself in the mirror and be proud to be who I am supposed to be ( did not get there easily, lots of loss, hearache, tears and feeling like giving up)…Godspeed Elsa…

  6. The things that really capture and interest me are almost across the board, in the shadow. I went undercover as a gay man in my 20’s and talked a gay man (Ben) into helping me do this so I could find things out first hand. If I am going to do that and if he is going to do that, obviously we are not typical.

    Anyway, I am not interested in common things. It’s like the other day someone asked if I thought like Jung. Of course not! I have my own thoughts.

    You’d just have to be put out in the desert like I was as a kid. Spend 9 years out there, with nothing and see how well you can blend in later in life. Good luck! Good luck even having the desire.

    Mari – I can’t have two blogs. I can barely have one blog. As I said, I am paid to read charts. I work 15-16 hours a day reading charts and maintaining this blog. When would I write this other blog?

    I don’t understand why people can’t see I am only one human being here. How many hours do you think there are in an Elsa P day, that I should do more than I already do?

  7. I guess the real question is: are you deliberately trying to piss them off? If you are, then try to avoid it. If people are pissed at you when you’re not trying to, then it’s on them, really, isn’t it?

    There are people out there that have hated me on first sight. What can I do about that, other than to not exist? Uh, yeah.

    It’s not great to have people hate you. But as long as you’re not trying to deliberately screw people over, well… there is only so much you can do. If you want people not to hate you, and you don’t have the hate-on-first-sight thing that I do, then all you can do is sit quietly in the dark, all alone, QUIET. And what fun is that?

  8. Wow, I didn’t know I wasn’t the only one who had trouble blending in in life.

    All I know is that for me, when I ignore the stuff inside that wants to get out–my life goes to the shits!

  9. I’ve only read your blog for a year, in that time I’ve never seen you write anything at all offensive on here. I’ve never seen you write anything on here that didn’t ring true. There’s always some crazy person who wants to control others. (It’s YOUR blog, not anyone else’s) Forget them, you know what you’re doing is good. Don’t let them muzzle you because they’re loony.

  10. (Elsa) If your readers are looking for you to agree or support everyone of their beliefs your head would explode. It is unfair of us to ask that of you and it seems to me that you owe us nothing.

    Personally, one reason I come to your website is you are thought-provoking and not cookie cutter. Meanwhile the community doesn’t flinch and they generally show great respect even when there are differing viewpoints. In sum, your site is one of the last bastions of true discourse without malice. I only wish I could provide more help so please let me know if I can assist.

  11. I think it comes down to finding a place with those of kind, where ‘kind’ means not people who agree with you, but people who have a respect and acceptance of the notion of freedom of thought and speech without attack (on either side). Where reason and courtesy prevails.

    I’ve noticed that I can speak freely and express myself when in Ireland, or with Irish people, because we are by nature talkers, ideas people. But I have to govern myself down in Britain where I live, because the manner and style of communication are different and I am just not comprehended, and end up subject to judgement and attack.

    Being on the internet, and accessible globally, means all manner of people are reacting to what you say according to their particular conditioning, over which you have no control, because they are faceless and distant. And somehow, this must be ordered. I do think that paid classes are a big step in the right direction, because only those willing and open to engage with your way and style will take part. And if they don’t like it, they won’t come in again.

  12. I can totally relate to your situation. Four yrs ago I moved from Taos, NM, (anything goes USA) to a small conservative town in Texas. I love the town, the people are friendly; but VERY, VERY, stuck in their ways. I thought if I heard “we’ve always one it this way” I was going to scream, because it obviously wasn’t working too well for them…what I have learned is that isn’t what you say; but the way you say it.

    I am an Aries and like you I like to just lay it on the table; but I have found that slipping ideas under the tablecloth work better. When I keep my eye on the changes I am trying to make happen,and I introduce ideas in a non-threatening neutral way, I end up getting a lot more done and in the process have brought more people to sit at the table of change…it’s not the way I would like to handle it; but it does work. And, for me that’s the goal–CHANGE!

  13. Hi Elsa:)
    I believe Saturn forces us to look realistically at where we are,
    how we got here, and where were heading. We are forced to eliminate what is not working and pare down to the basic essentials. Saturn has just gone over my Libra Asc and Uranus so I can relate to what you’re going through. The outerworld has been slapping me on the wrist for a while and telling me “these are the rules, now follow them!!” I am being forced to finally change some bad habits that have not been serving me. But I am trying to obey father Saturn because he’s helping me to Grow Up and just follow the rules!!
    There is wisdom to it all though:) I guess:/

  14. I think as long as you have a higher purpose to what you write then although you may lose some readers you are doing the world a service! What matters is your purpose. There are always people who get offended no matter what. It’s something THEY need to work on not necessarily YOU.
    Although with Saturn going over Libra planets it forces you to follow the social laws.

  15. See, the thing is I have to pay bills. This just has to be a consideration.

    Further, there are other people who work here now and I think they would appreciate my not offending their customers. 🙂

  16. Your ideas and perspective are what brought me here, Elsa. Your sword-point delivery finally bled me to death.

    People whom you don’t offend will stay. People whom you do offend will leave.

    It’s your blog, your thoughts, your innermost self, who you really are and what you really believe that’s important at elsaelsa.com. You know you don’t need anyone’s permission to do anything you want. What I read is that you’re requiring that all readers grant you license to offend without objection. I wanted to hire you, but I wouldn’t pay you or anyone else to be offensive to me. Corrective, maybe, if you can back it up, but not offensive.

    Life in the USA doesn’t grant people protection against being offended. I’m retired on disability pension. I get offended 15 times a day by insensitive people. I avoid them with my feet and my pocketbook.

    Again I say: People whom you don’t offend will stay. People whom you do offend will leave.

    I don’t know why I’m bothering here except that I do believe you have good ideas. Katrina said, “Although with Saturn going over Libra planets it forces you to follow the social laws.”

    Good luck to you.

  17. Elsa, ignore them!

    You cannot please everyone.

    I think alot of the time people critize others so that they can feel better about themselves. The internet gives people a safe way to vent and not have to deal with the consquences face to face.

    I enjoy your views on life because they are not politically correct. You bring things from the darkness into the light. Some can’t handle the insight because they are crippled by fear.

    Besides, why are they reading your blog if they don’t like it?

  18. What about *your* sword, Parin? You’re the one who launched the personal attack. You’re the one who made accusations against me that you found were untrue and you are also the one who lacks the ability, the humility to apologize for that… or for anything.

    Maybe you are the one who needs luck more than I do. You apparently aren’t “dead” either, as here you are.

  19. I *have* hired Elsa, numerous times, and it was worth it 100 times over. And I was never offended. I was supported, listened to, helped, and not in some hold-the-crystals-fakey way but REAL wisdom, real years-of-experience, real help, real guidance. Real caring.

    Just my 2 cents 🙂

  20. My shrink offended me while he was helping me. He dug out the dirty nasties that were slowing killing me, and he’d tell me this shit and I’d drive home so angry!! “What the hell does he know, anyway???” But after I’d get home, it would click. Loudly enough it was like a physical sound! And it worked.

    Elsa was able to reach those same places, and shine lights on them. Because of all this Virgo, it took me awhile to get my head out of my ass, but I did it. I not only understand myself better than before, but I can see things in such a way I understand what’s happening.

    It seems to me that people don’t *want* to think. They want someone else to think for them, and by God, that person had better think the exact same way they already think or they are crap.

    People don’t have the balls to look into the dark corners – that’s why religion is such a tidy deal for so many. Go to church, have someone stand up there and tell you how to act, how to think, how to raise your kids, how to vote…a bit of wafer, a sip of wine, and you are saved for another week.

    Problem is, Jesus never said to do that! Jesus said “SEEK and ye shall find.” SEEKING is digging in the dark corners. To my mind, it’s a different thing, which is why I don’t bother with the anyone who toes any party line (religion, politics, racism, bigotry of any kind) on a deep level.

    We are individuals, and brought up with different points of view. It’s not a bad thing to encounter or interact with those who see things differently – as long as people are willing to communicate without venom and ignorance.

    Sadly the two go hand in hand.

    On the upside, more and more people are reaching the point that following the herd hasn’t done much for us as a society. They want the straight shit, even if they don’t agree with it – because maybe it’s not been presented in their life at all until that point.

    I trust Elsa, and Dixie, and Lupa, and Satori, and many many who are active on this blog in various ways more than I trust damned near anyone on this planet. I am not a trusting person. I’m suspicious of everyone – until I am convinced they are REAL. Once I know they are REAL, I know they can be trusted.

    Oh, boy. That just sorta all flowed out, but all of it needs to be said. Let’s hope the filter agrees?! LOL!

  21. What mp and Kristine said.

    Elsa has really helped during a dire time, and that takes a weird combo of balls and finesse.

    I would add that “being offended” is a reaction. A choice.

    “People whom you don’t offend will stay. People whom you do offend will leave” is actually “People WHO DON’T CHOOSE to be offended will stay. People WHO CHOOSE to be offended will leave.”

  22. I’m always amazed when a reply on one of your blogs here becomes a free writing frenzy. I used to have those all the time – not so much any more, thus my dormant blog. Thank you for the space to say it, and the community of REAL people you have built here, Elsa. Kudos x 1000!!

  23. “People whom you don’t offend will stay. People whom you do offend will leave” is actually “People WHO DON’T CHOOSE to be offended will stay. People WHO CHOOSE to be offended will leave.”

    Yes, Jilly and apparently I am responsible for the choices of strangers. 😉

    Reminds me of my oldest sister who used to beat my ass once a month. This was because I was responsible for her PMS, see.

    Ha ha ha.

    You can do it if you must but you can’t stop me from seeing through it because I figured this shit out when I was what? About 8?

    I was so glad when my sister left. She left when she was 16 and I did backflips for joy. Actually, I couldn’t do a back flip, I could only do cartwheels which is exactly what I did when I woke to find my sister had run away. Thank you, God.

    I am telling you, Annalisa could testify.

  24. I trust Elsa, and Dixie, and Lupa, and Satori, and many many who are active on this blog in various ways more than I trust damned near anyone on this planet.

    Agreed, and what Jilly said, and what MP said. (Though I’ve not done many consultations, I’ve done many classes and asked my share of questions and such over nearly a decade. I think I’m qualified to have an opinion.)

    I do understand, though, that bills need to be paid. If I came to work and told my coworkers things they didn’t like, I might not have a job for long. If I told my clients things they didn’t want to hear, it might be even shorter.

    It’s not an easy row you were given to hoe, Elsa.

  25. Luckily I can speak freely with clients and I do, without reservation. People who choose to pay me have already qualified me as a human being and found me worthy which is why the class will help here.

  26. I was thinking, occasionally I have clients tell me they are afraid of me but what is VERY common is they tell me they are writing to me because they know I will be straight with them. It’s not at all common, especially when the news is not that desirable but it is super valuable when someone can tell you when to brace – as valuable is when they can tell you, you’ve got smooth course ahead.

    I recently had things change for a long term client. She’s just clearing a really hard time.
    “This is the first time I have ever been able to tell you that you’re clear,” I said. And I meant it.

  27. You know that’s true usually but sometimes it can make things even worse. I paid for this service, where is the mint on my pillow and the serenade at my table?

    When a person is a producer and not a consumer, there is a completely different perspective about what’s going on. As a consumer, I was just really greedy about my internet infotainment until I became a consumer. I remember thinking all kinds of things about people and their blogs, like doesn’t this person realize I am a *customer*? I don’t like this and I don’t like that and I’m not being treated well.

    But then I became a producer and my perspective changed overnight. What a greedy pack of fucks people can be! It’s amazing. I kept feeling like my integrity…I can’t explain it, some kind of boundary I had as producer was constantly being encroached on and challenged. People would say would you do this, can you do that, I don’t like this, can I have an extra bit of your time, why didn’t you answer my email, I wrote you a personal message last week and *you didn’t answer me* — I mean I typed it all out and used punctuation and everything. I’m such a supporter, I’m so special, you owe me. I’ve been wronged! I deserve better treatment from you!

    And like, on and on and I’d be scratching my head, freaking out and exhausted.

    I began to see that I made some big mistakes in the beginning. I made myself too accessible and I tried to answer every request. There were a couple things I never should have done, but I wanted people to like me and keep coming back. I liked the traffic. Finally the whole thing toppled, it was like a sandcastle getting eaten by the sea. I wasn’t sleeping and I was *so pissed off*.

    It would take tremendous restraint on my part not to tell people to just fuck off. Now I wonder what would have happened if I had done that. Maybe my blog would still be something I wanted to do.

  28. Just my personal thought, but I would pay for a place where you, Elsa, could write unfettered. I know that’s not what you’re asking for, since you don’t need/want more on your plate, but if I had the option, I would.

    I appreciate being provoked. I enjoy it. If I have a reaction to something, positive or negative, then I get to examine myself and why. It’s refreshing and healing. It’s growth.

  29. Thanks, SaDiablo.

    eva, I have a take on this but it’s one of those things I can’t make fit the blog anymore. But you are exactly correct – people do see it from THEIR perspective and since this is my blog, it is run by MY perspective even though like so many other things, my perspective is unusual.

    Unusual until you think about it for a minute and then you see the pure logic.

    Anyway, if I can ever find a way to write this stuff I will. With Saturn on my ass, no telling. I am in the land of getting what I deserve so when I “know better than to write something”, I better heed that or else.

  30. Well I experienced it for my whole life, a strange phenomenon perhaps related to the Uncensored writing I always practiced and, being the tendency to write exaclty what one thinks, is not precisely the best for continuous popularity…

    Anyway your hint can be important in order to better understand the astrological positions that allow this phenomenon to happen…

    Thank you very much

  31. I’ve noticed that any of my friends who have sites or blogs get this kind of intense interaction, and it takes a great amount of desensitization to deal with it.. however, it kind of became a trend in America where people couldn’t debate, disagree without completely going over the top.. nothing wrong with stating your opinions and maybe strong opinions will bring out the shadow.. bring it on, I say… if people get offended they’ll get over it… it’s actually more interesting this way, edginess makes people think for a change! But maybe this is because I’ve lived in NYC for decades and people are always this way.

  32. Well they hijack the place, Virginia. They won’t just state their opinion, they expect me to respond. Respond and respond quickly as they are waiting there with their gun in hand.

    The thing is, I have no interest in responding so then all kinds of bad things happen over hours, days, weeks or months.

  33. It seems to me, an astrologer is a kind of ‘spiritual doctor’ in the same way that a medical doctor is for physical ills. Just as you go to a medical doctor for diagnosis and possible cure, so you choose an astrologer for what that skilled person can tell you, with a view to diagnosing where you are going wrong in your life choices. You also hope to get advice based on many years of deep study, advising you how to heal your ‘ills of choice’.

    Don’t shoot the messenger. If you don’t like your doctor’s diagnosis – say he tells you your lifestyle and diet is causing heart disease or cancer – we don’t start abusing the doctor nor do we go off and look for one with better news.

    This is Elsa’s room. It’s public, but it’s also her private space. If you don’t like her voice, or her decor, or her friends, then the remedy is yours not hers. Insulting your hostess or causing rows in her room is plain bad manners.

    Parin, please take note. I’ve read some of your old posts – sad stuff – and I’m surprised you’re still lurking on here ready to make waves and to disparage Elsa on her own boards. If you don’t find nurture in the food, time to get out of the kitchen.

  34. maybe the virgo other life is creeping too close to the real life. or not enough people realize this isn’t you, as a person, and there’s a life you’re trying to live, too?

    i honestly, think, though, that if everyone likes you, you’re not being honest. which is probably not what libra wants to hear 🙁 and that some people you really can’t “just get along” with… and maybe it’s not worth your bother to try.

    the concern about alienating customers is valid, too, but the breath of fresh air here is possibly a motivation for those who do stick around.

    perhaps people don’t like to think wisdom comes from human beings? who are imperfect and have things going on in their world…?

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