The Astrology Of Cheating – Nature Or Nurture?

gotti.jpgSome people mentioned control as an issue around people tolerating (or not tolerating) cheating on Your Lover Cheats…

Another reader asked where you might look in a chart to determine a person’s position on cheating. I don’t think it can be narrowed down.

For example, I have Uranus in the 7th. This might describe someone in a group marriage. In my case it describes someone who will abruptly leave a relationship – turn it off like a switch.

You’ve got to consider the whole chart.  I have a packed 8th house to go with that Uranus placement. Loyalty matters!

The moon would also factor as it relates to your deep roots. For example, my husband and I watched a documentary on the mafia on the history channel, chronicling the decline of the organization. One of the detectives described the scene when he showed up at the home to arrest one of the mobsters..

Apparently the wife answered the door. She stood in the doorway and said her husband wasn’t home. She then began to swear at the police in Italian.

The cop was able to speak Italian, so he cussed back at her. Looking outraged, she slammed the door.

A minute later her husband came out on the porch holding his hands in front of him to be cuffed. He said he would rather go to the station then be home with his wife… listen to her yell at him because she’d been disrespected by the cop!

I can relate to this! A man is welcome to cheat on me, however the door swings one way and locks as if closes.

Respect is something that matters to the fire signs, especially Leo. But I wonder how much of this is cultural. Because my husband’s chart is quite different than mine, but he knows and follows the same rules I do. And no one has to tell us the rules. We just know them. Cheat on your husband, don’t even think of coming home and vice versa. You’re liable to get shot, see?

Matter of fact, thinking you can come home after you’ve cheated is probably a worse offense than the cheating itself!
So what do you guys think? Nature… or nurture?

22 thoughts on “The Astrology Of Cheating – Nature Or Nurture?”

  1. Hey!!!!! My venus is in my 7th house. I have been with lifemate for 27 years. I have never cheated on him. Would never cheat on him. Not only would I lose him and his love, I would lose his respect. Nature or Nuture…hmmmmmm, I would say nature. Likewise, I would not accept a cheating mate.

    I would not become emotional involved with anyone who did want to make a commitment to me. I could have a relationship, but there would be a distance.

  2. One of my books says that Venus in the 7th is attracted to and attractive to everyone. But of course, that’s only one-tenth of the entire chart. Someone who has loyalty prominent in the rest of their chart is not going to act on those feelings.

  3. I’d say nature, and I am by nature proud.

    “thinking you can come home after you’ve cheated is a worse offense then the cheating itself”

    Damn right it is. It is flagrant and extremely arrogant. I’m glad you said that bit about RESPECT. Ignorance, stupidity, immaturity are all forgivable, but disrespect me in public or behind my back and I will never forgive or forget. No Leo here, but lots of fire. Disrespect is a dealbreaker. And that’s my EEEEEEGO talking Elsa.

  4. Right and right, Venus in the 7th house according to things I have studied…has a reputation for being a Flirt, I’m sorry!

    and yes I agree with Lis, it is a Fraction of the picture, only I wouldn’t say 1 ninth, I’d say it is more like a gazillianth of the actual chart

    As in…how is that Venus aspected? What sign is it IN?

    Venus in Scorpio in the 7th, e.g., I wouldn’t worry As much because Taurus rising people are extremely monogomous natured (I know, I know, you have examples which disprove that, and then we need to go back to not forgetting it is only one small part of a huge pictue).

    If I should see a chart with Venus in ARIES in the 7th house then, personally, I would lower my expectations of loyalty from such a person to approximately zero. At least they are going to LOOK… that is the least of it..

    but this lowering expectations, that’s just me! I have a right to lower my expectations if I feel like it, don’t I?

    Venus in Taurus in the 7th. Hmmm, Venus is HOME in Taurus. Maybe wouldn’t occur to them to … uh, Flirt. Personally, I wouldn’t want to leave them too horney for too long.

    Venus in Pisces in the 7th house…it’s going to be a spiritual situation Pisces on the 7th you are bringing Neptune on the 7th house). Venus is exalted in Pices. Mose likely this person will not be able to define things the way lots of other people do. Personally, I wouldn’t trust em with a 10 foot…….. anything.

    If you have examples where this isn’t true, go back to where I said ‘gazillians’ of variables…

    Venus is also the ruler of Libra. Venus in Libra in the 7th ……… hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Libra has a reputation for the stacked and overlapping relationships anyway. They don’t leave someone until the next one is lined up, and here the line is LONg

    Venus in Gemini in the 7th……this is another one where I would lower my expectations of loyalty… like, if there is a scale with a lowest end, they break the scale – duck –

    Venus in Cancer in the 7th ….. Cancer is so family oriented …. even if they should think to Flirt, what about the children …

    Venus in Aqu in the 7th…Leo rising, Interesting Person … Whoa. Fixed energy and flamboyant. Either they are there for you or they are for you are not there, but you won’t be unclear about it.

    Venus in Leo in the 7th … Leo is all about love love love. Aqu rising…humanity. I would trust them just so long as I could see them.

    Venus in Cap in the 7th (not leaving anyone out). I’d be afraid to let them go to work, othr than that I think everything would be fine.

    Venus in virgo in the 7th……Well, virgo is a dual sign anyway, married at least twice or so they say. But Flirt? Only in the name of healing, since half of them are physicians. (Loonsounds has digressed into humor from the viewpoint of Satun in scorpio in the 8th house).

    Venus in Sagitarius in the 7th, coined the phrase ‘open relationship’

    who’d I forget?

  5. I have a venus in the 7th in aquarius, but my rising is cancer.

    I like to flirt. I like being attractive to others. I could be promiscuous. But I would not be unfaithful to someone I loved.

  6. lol. It sounds cliche, but I find it very accurate for me.

    “I’d be afraid to let them go to work, other than that I think everything would be fine.”
    haha – chances are the only way they’ll cheat on you is with their career. But hey, at least it’s not with a human being!

  7. Loonsounds,
    you wrote:
    “If I should see a chart with Venus in ARIES in the 7th house then, personally, I would lower my expectations of loyalty from such a person to approximately zero.”

    I have Venus in Aries conjunct the Descendent (6th house though, does this still count? LOL) One thing for sure – I don’t flirt at all… I think the Aries makes me EXTREMELY upfront about where I stand in relation to anyone.

    When I was much much younger and in my first relationship(and also very naive) I actually told my BF at the time: “Honey there’s this guy I want to have an affair with”. And my BF being a Libran-uranian-hippie type, replied: “Do what you want. We don’t own each other” So I scheduled a date with the guy I was interested in and told BF to not come home that night. (gasp! yes this is all true.) And I had that affair. And BF was really mad later on but hey – all the cards were on the table. We stayed on in that relationship for another 2-3 years as crappy as it was. I stopped having that affair because my curiosity had already been satisfied. Is this still technically “cheating”??

    Of course, today, the thought of cheating on my partner (or vice versa) makes my stomach turn… I also have my Sun and Saturn in the 7th house.

  8. Cheat on me and COME HOME??? HUMILIATE ME???

    I’ll do more than curse at you in Italian (which I can do very effectively, btw). I’ll destroy every possession you love (except offspring, duh, I’m no Medea); I will broadcast your infidelity to everyone I encounter who has a functioning sense of hearing; I will list your real/invented sexual shortcomings with the utmost disdain.

    Sure I’ll look crazy for a while, but who cares? The door, naturally, will be closed forever. I might not wish a tortuous death on you, but I really don’t care if your life goes to hell, either.

    Peace-loving PixieDust, over and out 😉

  9. Oh I have a Pisces moon and 7th H cusp pisces with Saturn. And of course I can have nebulous emotional attachments with a few people, w/o thinking that I myself am cheating.

    Although sexually I truly wouldn’t. NEVER two lovers, ew.

  10. I don’t know, I feel a bit out of place, but cheating would not be a 100 percent dealbraker for me. At one time it would have, but I just don’t feel like that anymore. I pretty much would want to know WHY more than anything else. And there are a lot of whys i can understand, and yes I would want them to tell me about it, so I could make up my mind what I wanted to do.

    I am cancer sun, and a taurus rising, but I have neptune in the seventh, (yes I can sacrifice for love), saturn conjunct venus in gemini in the second, and I am VERY uranian, so you can see how this plays.

  11. Pixiedust, eek that is kind of scary given that it’s not too difficult in these days of facebook and the like, to broadcast one’s perception of another ones infidility across the entire world .. the only problem with that being that the rest of the world can go for months (or maybe forever) without hearing the other side of the story….and sometimes there really is another side of the story worth hearing.

    Ya know…what’s his name, the dude on ‘Friends.’ His position that they were ‘on a break’ in the relationship therefore it wasn’t cheating???…

    LC right, Venus in Aries, yes, right up front about it, what a perfect example of Venus in Aries on the DC.

    Anyone ever been out with someone and notice tht they really ARE scoping out all other potentials in the room (not even pretending to focus on you very much) There is Venus in Aries living ‘down’ to it’s reputation … may we all be spared from the strong venus in aries energy especially when it’s bored.

    Anabanana, that’s not quite what I meant about Venus in Cap in the 7th house, but OK 🙂

    Oh, also I was thinking…I made it too easy for the Venus in Scorp in the 7th, Venus is in its detriment in Scorpio, or fall or something, so I don’t know how it would do there. Not well, I’m guessing, may be the sneakiest Flirt of the batch.

    some of my studies have suggested that a stellium in the 7th house can be very challenging to marriage or a long term relationship no matter the planets in the stellium. I know that a lot of astro-time-setters try to avoid placements of planets in the 7th house at the time of the event such as marrige. I hope we can study the 7th house in the class.

    Then again, venus also represents money…perhaps it means your spouse is loaded to have Venus in the 1/7 axis, nicely aspected, or one marries wealth. hey where’s John McCain’s Venus, his wife is a gazillionaire. Anyone got that handy?

    I had another thought on Venus in the 7th for Cancer…it is their families, their kids, their little projects and big projects, all of the people they are nurturing and All the People, that is who they flirt with, therefore probably way to busy to Flirt Around for real.

  12. Hahahahahah. Venus in 7th and I am attracted to NO ONE in years. And very rarely before those years. (But then again, I also have Venus Saturn squashing me.) In Taurus. I’m not into flirting. I think the Saturn utterly negates the Taurus.

    McCain’s Venus is in the twelfth.

  13. “Anyone ever been out with someone and notice tht they really ARE scoping out all other potentials in the room (not even pretending to focus on you very much) There is Venus in Aries living ‘down’ to it’s reputation … may we all be spared from the strong venus in aries energy especially when it’s bored.”

    Venus in Aries is ALWAYS bored, even when we think we’re not. “The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence” is our motto – but as we get older we realize that’s not true. That does not make us cheaters – just extremely (unintentionally) inconsiderate of loved one’s feelings. But luckily, with age comes wisdom.

  14. Hey, Venus in Aries in the 7th here! Here’s the deal with me…I DO flirt, but not because I want to lie and cheat and betray. It’s because I like people. I like everyone. You might even say, I think the whole world is sexy, unless you’re a lying, negative, betraying jerk. I could talk to the garbageman or a CEO and get a charge. It takes an intentional slowing down for me to give my undivided devotion to my love interest, but once I do, you better believe I expect the same in return.. During my most recent relationship, I tried to change who I am to appease… and now I realize, I am just not everyone’s cup of tea. I certainly wasn’t his, and now I admit, he wasn’t mine either. This Venus in Aries in 7th yearns for the guy who understands that while I may be energized by the sexiness of the universe, I am grounded by the love I give to him and him only.

  15. I have Uranus in 7th too, and I can relate where I can shut off a relationship as if there were some hidden switch. Once I decide it’s over, it’s over immediately and for good. I think it might be because I have Mars in Scorpio in 7th as well (I put a TON of my energy into a relationship and become enraged at the loss and waste), along with a bunch of planets in Taurus opposing it. I’m all about me being respected, and I’m all about loyalty. I don’t mind if a man I’m in a relationship with wants to have sex with another person but I would rather he tell me ahead of time, and he better remember that he’s still in a relationship with me when he gets back, because the minute he starts disrespecting me he’s out the door! Adios!

  16. I admire some of ya’lls liberal-ness. I’m too posessive, but not in the crazy-jealous-psycho way. I just want to be the center of my man’s universe, that’s it. Plus, I don’t like to compete, I’d rather be the winner without ever playing..hehe.
    I don’t mind my husband flirting a little and having female associates. All I ask is for the same liberty in return. Like Maureen, I like EVERYONE, so my flirting is a genuine “you’re cool” flirting, not flirting with a motive to take it to the next level. I don’t have Aries, I only have Chiron in the 7th, but my Venus, Saturn, and Jupiter are in the 11th. My slight possesiveness might be from my Scorpio ASC? Mars in Cancer? Sun in Leo? I don’t know. Where do you find possesiveness?

  17. Venus in the 7th house update!! I was just reading the remainder of The Mountain Astrologer for Dec/Jan, focusing on an artice tiled ‘Love’s mysterious ways.’ and lo and behold, on page 81, there I just saw this…

    “John McCain birth time update.” Most recent BD according to a BC shows him at 8/29/36 6:26 pm, Colon Panama, which gives him not only Venus in the 7th, but Venus conjunct Neptune and the sun in the 7th, and Mercury there also, out of sign, 4 planet stellium in the 7th house (all in Virgo, showing him Pisces rising 5 degrees 59).

    Jupiter in the 10th house almost right on the MC I think they have the chart right this time…6 of his major planets are angular which certainly might someone with such a public life as his, and also look at that luck factor with co-ruler Jup in Sag right on the DC…he always refers to his nine lives and he has become more and more of a well known personality with each passing year.

    Earlier on the thread I had used him as an example of someone married to a ‘gazillionaire’ & as someone whose life has been made so pubic that we know, and he freely admits, that he cheated on his 1st wife for a few years prior to finding Cindy, and even went so far as applying for a marriage licence in Arizona before his divorce had become final from the first wife.

    Venus in the 7th house…there you go, a Flirt and marrid to wealth (gobs of wealth, Venus conj. Nept, Venus rules his 8th, nep his asc). chiron is also going right into the 7th house by a tight aspect to venus, and I have also read that chiron and Venus ‘mashed up together’ (to use an elsa lingo)can show wealth through a partner.

    Man alive, I love astrology, it’s so much fun.

  18. An astrology chart is simply a map of how we’ve been (or not been) nurtured, no? I’d say lots of 5th house influence. The serial cheater i know has lots of that….mars, pluto and jup in the 5th….maybe sun and venus too, but not sure of the exact minutes of his birth time.
    5th house people need LOTS of attention, especially romantically.

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